Chapter Two
After the first iffy question, she carefully avoided any others like it. After the first defensive reaction, I didn't have to give another. I definitely wasn't used to this much talking, and my voice was starting to hurt.
I didn't mind, though, and just for a moment, I nearly completely forgot about how much pain I was in. Just talking to Alice distracted me for one blissful hour. Just enough to ease the constant tension I felt.
Sitting beside her, I felt the strangest sense of protection. As if just having a friend like her, people like Rachel no longer mattered. For an hour, the field trip seemed bearable. The longer I sat with her, the familiarity only got stronger.
Maybe that was why I got along so well with her? I searched my mind, trying to remember where I'd met her before. It just didn't sit right with me how I recognized the color of her eyes, and seemed drawn to her like I knew her, but couldn't remember anything whatsoever about this stranger. It scared me, but I couldn't be scared.
The entire time I answered her questions, she had given me her full attention. It was very strange to me, but I found I liked it. I was used to being in the background, always just there. Never listened to, never given a second glance. Never receiving attention, unless it was meant to hurt me. I found myself meeting her eyes more often, and I found myself smiling just a bit more often. I'd never had the opportunity to just talk, and it felt good.
"I want to ask you something, but I don't." I admitted quietly, and she gave me her attention again.
"Why not?" She asked, curious.
"Because I don't know what it is I want to ask." I mumbled, "And I've found out that it's better not to ask many questions. Nobody likes someone who asks too many questions."
"That's not how it should be." She frowned a little, "Who told you that?"
I looked down, "It doesn't matter."
"Is that why you're so quiet?" She asked, and I glanced up.
"I just never have much to say." I sighed, "I'm stuck in my mind a lot of the time."
"Sometimes it's good to talk." She offered, offering a bit of hope. I immediately shook my head.
"No it's not." I answered firmly, "It's not good to talk. Not at all." Worry crossed her features.
"This is the first time I've heard her speak so much." I looked over, up at Mr. Daniels as he came to stand beside the table, "What's your secret?"
I stopped talking then. Looking down immediately, I studied my hands in my lap as she replied to him politely. Even after he walked away, it was difficult for Alice to get a reply from me. Right back to my quiet self, but she never stopped trying.
By the time we had to leave, I didn't want to. I nearly cried saying goodbye to her.
At the end of the hour, Alice stood up as my class did and gently hugged me. The very slightest pressure that she gave me told me that she was being incredibly careful, which completely threw me off. How'd she know that any harder pressure would have hurt?
Not to mention the fact that I wasn't used to being hugged. Not in the slightest. I was so shocked, I didn't know what to do. She didn't seem the slightest bit discouraged by the fact that I didn't hug her back.
"Stay strong, Leandra." She told me as she pulled away, and I looked up at her. Though the rest of the group clearly found this behavior strange, they didn't comment.
"No promises." I found myself murmuring in response, meeting her eyes one last time before Mr. Daniels called me again. I glanced back to him, before sighing heavily, "And thank you. For talking to me."
"Why would she do that?" Rachel's sneer made me close my eyes and look down, "She was probably bored to tears the whole hour."
"Actually," Alice replied, "Leandra is very fascinating to talk to. I found her very intelligent and incredibly polite. She very easily held my attention the entire time she spoke to me. How many times have you been given that compliment, Rachel?" I smiled, despite the situation. Rachel didn't reply, aside from huffing and storming away.
"Thanks." I murmured, looking back up at her.
"Any time." She smiled encouragingly at me, and I couldn't help but return it.
"Leandra." Mr. Daniels called, "Let's go." I sighed, my smile fading.
"Bye." I told her.
"Take care, Leandra." She told me, and I paused before turning. Making my way toward the door where Mr. Daniels stood waiting.
I followed my group down the hall. Our next class was History, which wasn't so hard. I didn't hate it as much as I hated math. I sighed, already missing Alice. This was going to be a very long day. I doubted I'd find another friendly face in this place. I just counted my lucky stars that I'd found just one.
I felt myself distracted by how strange the situation was. The sense of knowing this person, but having no idea where I'd seen her before. That didn't happen to me often. Usually, it was difficult for me to even look up and around enough.
Just as I had predicted, no one else attempted to talk to me the way she had. I kept my mouth shut, letting whoever prattle on about whatever subject they were on in the class we visited. Staring out the window.
Most just gave up and started talking among themselves. Joking to their classmates about how they got a 'broken' kid. One suggested trying to find an on switch. At least someone was having fun.
By the time lunch rolled around, and the class gathered in the cafeteria with everyone else, I was nearly desperate to slip off on my own. Just to get away from people for a few minutes. Just a few minutes to myself.
I looked around the loud cafeteria once Mr. Daniels chose a table in the center of the room. So many people were in here, and it intimidated me. As situations like this often did.
My school cafeteria never had this many people in it.
It made my stomach hurt. Although, I wasn't sure if that was from nervousness, or the smell of food in the room. My stomach snarled, and I rubbed it gently, whimpering quietly. Knowing I'd get nothing to quiet it.
A few of the boys in my class had found a small group of high schoolers to sit with, and the teachers allowed that, which prompted a couple more from my class to flood their table. Just to seem a little 'cooler'.
I slowly looked up, and around again at the feeling of being watched. Finding Alice's eyes again. It wasn't just her this time, but others sitting with her far across the crowded room. I blushed and waved a little, trying to let her know I was okay, and survived the day so far. Though I was nowhere near okay on the inside. She smiled sadly and waved back, probably to make me feel less alone. I appreciated the gesture.
A boy to her left looked to her, seeming to murmur something quietly. I didn't see her reply, but he looked to me next, and I immediately looked down. I didn't like being watched, or caught looking at anyone else. It was just something that made me uncomfortable.
I continued to stand there, even as most of my class had seated themselves, unfolding lunches.
I debated taking something from someone and hauling ass for the door, but I wouldn't. I'd never do anything like that. I knew what it was like not having anything to eat. I wouldn't do that to anyone else.
I turned my attention back to Mr. Daniels.
"Can I go use the restroom?" I asked quietly.
"Yes, just hurry back." I nodded and turned, clutching my bag to me and heading from the room. I had my out.
I looked around me in the deserted hallway, heading the opposite direction of the restrooms to outside. Pausing at a water fountain in the hall, I took several moments to drink. Hoping to calm the empty ache in my stomach just enough to survive until tomorrow. The cool water helped the pain, and soothed the nausea I felt.
Glancing up and down the hallway, I noted that I was still alone as I continued on. I slipped out the doors quietly, and darted over to the next building, hiding behind it nearest the trees. Opening my little backpack, I looked around me again, making sure I was alone before quickly taking out a cigarette and lighting it.
I smoked quickly. Downing it, so to speak. My back stayed turned to the side of the building, but my ears listened for any hint I was about to be discovered. Particularly the sound of the door I just left. There was no silent way to open those doors.
Not picking up any, I continued.
Especially after the long weekend with nothing to eat, I needed this. I closed my eyes, just taking a breather. Regathering my patience and soothing my nerves before I had to go back inside. After awhile, just being around so many people grated on me until I just wanted to run. The stress on me started to become too much after while, and I needed to take a few minutes to myself.
Nobody ever noticed when I scooted off on my own, so it didn't become an issue. I normally cried when I was off on my own. The deep emptiness in my heart coming forward amidst the stress. Today was different. Today I didn't cry as much, because I was at a different school.
I couldn't cry today, because I had to be on my best behavior. I scoffed to myself at the thought. Best behavior. It was all a bunch of bull. Wouldn't the high school rather all of us behave like animals? Just so they knew what'd be joining them in a few years. Set the bar low, expect the worst and you're hardly ever disappointed.
It was chilly today, and the cold made my forming bruises ache.
I cuddled in my thin sweater as the rain started to pick up, thudding almost loudly as it hit me. I shivered, but continued on with my cigarette, trying to stand closer to the building where the rain wouldn't get to me. I closed my eyes, resting my head against the brick of the building. Just for a moment to rest my eyes, trying to ease the headache I knew was coming on.
When the hot end started to get too close to my fingers, I stubbed out the cigarette on the bottom of my shoe and pinched the end between my fingers. Making sure it wasn't still hot before tossing it into the trash can in front of me. I really didn't feel like setting any fires today.
I took a deep breath, and held it for a moment. Letting it out when I was sure I was ready to head back inside. I waved the air around me, trying to clear it of smoke. Feeling confident I'd pulled this off, I spun, ready to jog back into the building, but stopped dead in my tracks, nearly bouncing backwards with a gasp.
My heart racing, I met the eyes of a high schooler. He had the same golden eyes as Alice, but a guy, with auburn, almost bronze colored hair. I recognized him from Alice's table. The one who'd spoken to her. I stared up at him, wide eyed. Maybe he hadn't been standing there long.
His eyes had the same piercing effect as Alice's did, but it was far more intimidating coming from him. I took another careful step back as my eyes found the one standing beside him next. He didn't look the same as the dark haired one, with his lighter dirty blonde hair, but immediately, I noted his eyes too.
I frowned a little, noticing the sense of familiarity with these guys. Just as much as I had felt toward Alice. What the hell was going on? I chose to file that question away for later, while I focused on the more pressing issue. Being caught.
Shit they scared me.
The darker haired one stood on the left, while the one on the right looked even more unhappy than the first one, and at first, I didn't know what to do. I hated being caught off guard like that.
"H-Hi." I mumbled, "You scared me." I laughed a little nervously. Despite the way I tried to make my heart slow down.
"Care to explain what you were just doing?" The dark-haired one asked me quietly. For emphasis, he gestured gently to the bag on my shoulder. I chose to ignore that. His blonde friend beside him glanced to him, but I had feeling he wouldn't be the one to talk to me. His gaze was firm. It made me nervous.
"Oh, uhm.." I hesitated, looking down, "N-Nothing. Just getting some air. It's a little crowded in there."
His eyes searched my face, and I suddenly worried my concealer had come off in the slight rain. I thought of the yellowing bruise along the left side of my face, my darkening eye. Hoping he couldn't see them. I'd definitely need to check on it. As soon as possible.
"That's not what I saw." He replied. My cheeks blushed. I knew I'd been caught, so I figured that I might as well try to make this just a little better. My heart pounded, and I took slow, deep breaths. Trying to calm it. I huffed out a defeated breath, slouching just a little.
"Okay, look." I said quietly, "I don't do this often. Just.. Just now and then."
"Now and then is often enough." Was his calm reply, "How old are you?"
"Nine." I answered, my tone almost hesitant as I looked away.
"Nine years old and smoking." He shook his head, "Should I let someone know? Have them call your parents?"
"No." I told him firmly, a strong shiver of fear trying to steal my breath, "Please." I lowered my voice, "Don't tell anyone. I won't do it again, just please. Please don't get my parents called. Please."
He looked somewhat surprised at the fear in my voice. Studying my face closer, something of a carefully curious expression entered his eyes. Puzzled. As if he were piecing things together that I hadn't mentioned. I stayed quiet, though, waiting on his decision.
When he stayed quiet as well, I managed to figure out a way to persuade him, "Don't get them called. My mom's sick." More true than I wanted to admit, "And my stepdad works a whole lot. I never get in trouble at school."
"Okay." He finally said with a sigh, "Give me the ones you have on you, and I won't tell anyone." I couldn't believe my luck. He was going to let it slide.
I quickly nodded, reaching into my backpack and handing the pack over, my heart still racing. Not even caring I was handing all the ones I had over. I was just thankful, beyond thankful Jack wouldn't be called.
He nodded, "Just don't do it again, alright?"
"I won't." I said quietly, stuffing as much sincerity into my tone as I could, "I promise." He sighed, tossing the pack in the trash. It was quiet for a moment, until I spoke again.
"What are your names, anyway?" I asked, trying to figure these guys out. They weren't nearly as open or friendly as Alice was. The left one smirked at my question. The other stayed with a frown. Seeming puzzled.
"Edward Cullen." He replied. I nodded, looking down before glancing to the second one.
"Jasper." He gave me a nod, "Hale." Those weren't common names. I couldn't help focusing on their eyes. Like Alice's, Edward's eyes were golden. A strange golden color not commonly seen. Jasper's were darker, but somehow just as confusing.
"Leandra." I said quietly, silently debating for a moment. What could it hurt to give them my last name? "Leandra Wallace." I finished just as quietly, "Nice to meet you. Maybe I could have done it another way, but-"
"Why do you fear your parents?" Jasper asked. His tone was both curious, and firm. Not quite commanding, but with a smooth authority. Instantly taking my attention. He wasn't being mean with that question, but I couldn't just ignore it like I wanted to.
I still didn't know what to make of either of them, so I stayed guarded. My mind working a million miles a minute, trying to come up with an answer.
"I don't fear them.." I mumbled as casually as I could, keeping my eyes away from his, "I just.. Jack, my stepdad, would get mad if he got a call from the school and he had to leave work to come sort it out." I placed my bag back on my shoulder gently, awkwardly shoving my trembling hands into my pockets, "I don't like making him mad. That's all." Also an understatement.
"Your stepdad." Jasper spoke again with the same tone, "He's strict?"
"Very." I said without thinking. I instantly kicked myself, "I mean. Yeah, he has rules.." I looked down awkwardly. I was bombing. Quickly. I had to fix it, "Trust me. You've never met anyone like him before."
"What about your mother?"
"She's.." I recalled her passed out drunk on the couch every day, "She's very.. Laid back. Like I said, she's been sick. For a long time now."
I was fully convinced my mom had been drunk the day I was born, so that wasn't a lie. I couldn't remember a time when I didn't see her either passed out, or too drunk to have a conversation with.
I couldn't understand where all these personal questions were coming from, or why I bothered to answer them, but they agreed not to have Jack called. That's what mattered to me, and I wasn't afraid of them like I was always afraid of strangers. I was more comfortable than I had been all day, oddly enough. When did that happen?
I moved to the side, their eyes following me. I attempted to step around Jasper, and they just followed. Letting me pass, but walking along beside me. Jasper to my left, Edward to my right, as if herding me. I wasn't afraid, though. Only curious.
"Tell me about him." Jasper requested, and I glanced up at him with a small scoff.
"How much time do you have?" I replied quietly. I couldn't help the bitter edge to my voice. I wanted to ask him if he'd ever met Satan before, but I sighed instead, "He's taught me a lot." Another understatement, but the finality of my tone had to tell him I was done talking about Jack.
I looked to Edward, "You're Alice's brother?"
"It's safe to assume." He replied. I really couldn't tell by his tone if I'd pissed him off or not, so I got a little nervous.
"Well, it's just.. I saw you sitting with her earlier, and you two sort of look alike, I guess.. I just thought-"
"Relax." He told me, noticing my nervous rambling, "It seems you've made quite an impression on her."
"I have?" I asked, surprised. That really surprised me. I never made an impression on anyone. I certainly wasn't trying to leave any impressions. I wasn't aware I had, "I'm sorry."
"It's not a bad thing, Leandra." He seemed confused at my nervousness. Jasper, remaining quiet, just walked along beside me.
"Oh." I murmured, looking down, "Then.. You're welcome?"
He smirked again, chuckling quietly. I was extremely out of my element. I avoided talking to anyone like the plague. I half wondered what was wrong with me today, until he spoke again.
"Are you going to eat lunch?" He asked quietly. I sighed, remembering I didn't have anything.
"No." I murmured, looking up at him, "I'm not hungry. How about you?" I smiled a little, "Do you always follow fourth graders outside?"
"Only when they go off by themselves." He chuckled slightly. I smiled a little, shaking my head. My smile faded as I realized I'd have to go back inside soon. They'd start wondering if I fell in.
"I gotta go back now." I said sadly, looking up at him. He nodded. I hated having to tell them that. It was nice having someone to talk to. It surprised me to find that it was just as easy to talk to him as it was Alice.
Despite him not being as friendly as she was. He had a carefully calm sort of air about him. Like he was listening to something I couldn't hear. It almost made me want to shut up, not wanting to interrupt him.
Jasper's presense alone was almost as calming. It was the oddest sort of emotion. Being both intimidated by him, but not minding it.
"No more smoking, alright?" Edward asked quietly.
"Okay." I agreed. At least not here. Today would be the last time I ever brought cigarettes with me on a field trip. Maybe even at school at all. He followed me as I changed my direction and started walking slowly back toward the lunch room, my hands still in my pockets. I didn't want to go back.
I'd always preferred to be on my own, and I always hated other people. I was just an odd one. There were people in my class I did get along with. Ones who weren't mean, or didn't look at me like trash, but I never bothered trying to gather a friend or two. I stayed away from them just as much as I stayed away from the ones I didn't get along with.
"Are you from around here?" Edward asked, following. Jasper did as well, which I was quickly learning not to mind. I liked them.
"No, I live in Sappho." I said quietly, looking over at him, "This is the only high school anywhere around, so they brought us here. I should be going to the school here, but some of the parents thought it would be cheaper to send us to the one closer. I'm not complaining. As shitty as school is with twenty five kids, I'd hate to see what it'd be like here."
"Shame." He said, "There isn't much to Sappho, is there?"
"There isn't much to Forks, either." I pointed out and he allowed that with a chuckle, "But there's more here than there is there." My small smile faded again and I sighed, "I didn't even want to come on this stupid trip."
"Why not?" He asked curiously.
"I don't like new places." I explained, "But I didn't want to stay home." I instantly kicked myself again. Fuck. I just knew now he was going to ask about my shitty life at home, and I'd have to lie even more. To my surprise, he only nodded.
"So what class do you have next?" He asked instead.
"Oh, uhm.." I paused on the sidewalk, and reached into my little pack. Trying to shake off my surprise. I sighed, looking at the paper, "Biology."
He nodded again, "I'll see you there then."
I smiled a little, "If you see a girl named Rachel, trip her for me."
"I wouldn't." He replied, surprised.
"I'd do it myself," I muttered, "But I'd probably be the one to get into trouble for it."
"Is she mean to you?" He asked, frowning. The second time I'd been asked that today.
"We've never gotten along." I murmured, "So the stupid teacher thought it was a good idea to put me in her group." I sighed, "She trips me one more time, she won't have a foot left to trip me with. She's just mad I socked her this morning."
He saw I was getting irritated, "Is that how you got that bruise?" He asked, pointing to the left of my face. I blushed again, looking down. My eyes involuntarily widened, and my heart sped up.
As carefully calm as I usually was, that was unexpected. Completely throwing me off.
"Uh.." Should I say yes? "No, that.." I couldn't think of anything. My panicked mind stayed blank. I reached up and touched it gently with my fingers.
Nobody had ever asked about my bruises before. Nobody had ever even acknowledged that they'd seen any of them before. I didn't know how to react now that someone had. I hadn't bothered to come up with an excuse for it beforehand, so my stupid mind wouldn't come up with anything but the truth.
Edward seemed to stiffen again, but I ignored it.
"You don't have to answer." He said. I picked up something of a hidden meaning in his words. Something he wasn't saying. Despite that, my panic slowly began to ease. I still trembled subtly, and my hand lowered.
I didn't have to answer. I wasn't going to answer either way. Not truthfully, anyway, but it definitely helped that I didn't have to lie to him.
"Yeah." I sighed, "So.. See you in a bit then." I tried to smile up at him, but his eyes seemed angry. I subtly put distance between him and I, not sure what to expect. What had I done to piss him off?
"Yeah." He said, turning and walking into the cafeteria. Jasper's eyes lingered on me for a moment, before he followed Edward. Just leaving me there, confused and worried.
I watched after them for a few seconds, half considering going back for another cigarette, but I decided against it. I'd been gone for too long as it was. I doubted anyone would care what I'd been doing, but I didn't want to risk it.
I shook my head, making my way back inside after them. I was half worried I'd made Edward mad by not answering, but oh well. I couldn't tell him the truth. I couldn't tell anyone the truth. I was still in complete shock over the fact that he saw the bruise I tried to cover up. Never, in all of my school career, had anyone ever seen it. Any of them.
I suddenly thought back to this morning. My wish. I'd wished that someone would look close enough to see the pain I was in. I'd wished someone wouldn't buy my lies.
Maybe today was different.
What with the dream this morning, how much I hated waking up. Add this on, it only created an even stranger mystery. Did this mean that these people wouldn't accept my assurances that I was okay? Did this mean they saw me?
That thought scared me, despite how hard I'd wished for it. It scared me, because I sure as hell didn't know what to expect, should they insist. Seeing me wasn't saving me. It was ensuring more pain if they ever told anyone.
I stepped into the bathroom, looking over my face in the mirror. The concealer had stayed, almost completely covering the bruise. Maybe just a very slight discoloration over my cheek. It confused me as to how he managed to know it was there, when I almost never gave him direct sight of my cheek.
How he'd seen it wasn't the issue, though. The issue was that he had.
Who would he tell? Was he so upset that he'd run to a teacher and tell them to ask me about it? Would Jack be called? Would Jack be told that I had told someone? My heart sank at that thought.
Despite my efforts to hold it back, I started to cry. My breath coming in quiet, panicked gasps, I cried gently in fear. My legs trembled, threatening to give out, so I held tightly to the sink.
Just the thought of Jack finding out I told anyone, caused fear to race through me. My heart pounded a million miles a minute, and I knew I had to calm down. I couldn't walk back into the cafeteria like this.
I calmed myself slightly with the thought that when I saw him next class, I'd have to explain where the bruise came from. That would divert his suspicion, and it would keep him quiet. Keeping him quiet was the number one priority right now. My life depended on it.
But.. What if he didn't wait until next class?
That got my feet moving. I scooted from the bathroom as fast as I could, my panic renewed. Left over tears still on my cheeks. I had to find him now. It couldn't wait.
I had two minutes to come up with an excuse, before I made it to his table. I fell, I ran into a pole, I got hit by a car, a goddamn bear mauled me, just keep your damn mouth shut!
I took a deep breath, holding it before letting it out. I had to calm down. What was believable? I was standing outside a door, and someone came through it really quickly. Yes.
To my relief, he was sitting there when I walked in. They all were. Despite the way I recognized three of the five sitting there, I was still nervous. Would they mind me going over there? I took the long way around, my breathing still racing as I made my way closer. Their eyes on me as if I were crazy as I stepped to Edward's side. Confused, he looked at me.
That wasn't very comforting, but neither was the thought of him ratting on me.
For a moment, it hit me. I was hardly taller than Edward with him sitting down. I hated how small I was. Shaking that off, I sighed and got back to what I needed to say.
"I ran into a door." I mumbled with finality.
"You ran into a door?" He asked, "Lovely. Nice to know."
"No.. I mean.. The door kind of.. Ran into me."
"I'm not following you."
"That's how I got.. This." I murmured, touching my cheek briefly, and understanding came to his eyes. Which I was thankful for, as I hated getting the feeling he questioned my sanity, "So.. Yeah. That's how I got it. A door hit me."
"You came all the way over here just to tell me that?" He seemed surprised.
"Yeah." I muttered, "I just.. Didn't want you to tell anyone about it.. Because you're kind of the only one who's ever noticed it, and-"
"Not true." Alice's voice had me look to her, "I noticed it. I just didn't ask about it." I looked to her side, to Jasper seated close to her. A blush came to my cheeks as I looked at the other two looking my way. The very large guy across the table had an amused smirk on his face, the blonde looked annoyed.
"Um.." I mumbled, suddenly very intimidated and I looked to Edward again, "Don't tell anyone, okay?"
"Relax." Edward told me, "I wasn't going to."
"She sure is a shaky little thing." The large one smirking chuckled, "I wish she'd come to my class."
"Emmett.." Alice scolded, "Stop."
"You weren't going to?" I asked quietly, half afraid to hope, "You're not going to now, are you?"
"No." He said, "I won't tell anyone. Although, maybe I should-"
"No." I whimpered, my breath catching, "Please. I'll be more careful. I promise. I won't stand near any doors. No doors. I'll stay away from them forever, if you just shut up." I couldn't help it this time. I was probably blowing it just by how I spoke, but I needed to stress how important it was without giving him any reason why it was so important. I did the best I could with what I had.
I was stared at, concern around the table. Even the smirking guy's smirk faded, and I sighed. Trembling from head to toe. That was something that couldn't happen.
"Jack can't know." I murmured quietly, "Please just forget about it." Edward was quiet for a moment, glancing to the side at the others, "I don't know how you saw it, but it really is nothing."
"Did he put that there?" He gestured to my face.
"No." I said instantly, "I ran into a door. I mean.." I sighed, "You know what I mean." He didn't buy it. I saw the difference immediately. Between the ones that only went as far as asking me if I was okay, and Edward's suspicious gaze now.
Shit, shit, shit. He didn't believe me. Not that I could blame him, but I didn't specifically need him to believe me. All I wanted from him was just to know he wouldn't run to the nearest teacher. It really was that simple.
I held his gaze, hoping that helped me. I wouldn't say another word unless he did, as he was clearly waiting for me to continue denying it. What he didn't understand, was that I was trying to protect my life. That wasn't something I took lightly.
Before I could even concentrate on what that thought meant, I saw his expression change ever-so-slightly. Not enough to identify what it was his emotion had changed to, but enough to see and distract me.
"You say I'm the only one ever to notice?" Edward asked finally, "Nobody has ever noticed?"
"No." I replied shakily, "Nobody." He was quiet, "Because there's nothing to notice. I just didn't want you to think the wrong thing." Nailed it. I still amazed myself at how I was able to lie. If Edward knew how right he was, I was a gonner.
"You're telling me," He sighed, turning in his chair a bit to face me a little more, "That I'm the only one to ever notice?"
"Yes." I sighed, slightly irritated now.
"So there's been more." He murmured.
Fuck.
"No." I replied instantly, "I-I just meant this. You're the only one to ever notice this."
He still didn't seem convinced. Glancing to the side again at Jasper, who returned his glance across the table. I held my breath.
"Alright." He told me, "I won't say a word about the door hitting you." The way he worded that worried me instead of comforted me, "Can you tell me more about where you live in Sappho?" My previous slight relief was squashed immediately. There was only one reason he'd need to ask where I lived. I wasn't stupid.
There were rules I followed. Rules I knew well, as it was a requirement. One, don't talk to anyone unless they talk to me first. Two, don't look at anyone for too long. Looking at them just opens me up for trouble. Three, never give away where exactly I live.
That third rule was one placed by Jack, but I edited it a little. Never telling anyone where the house was meant safety for me, and for whoever wanted to know as well. If I could keep one less person from knowing what kind of hell I lived in, or meeting Jack, I'd do whatever it took.
"Way across town." I said after only seconds, "Behind the last gas station before you hit the highway. In that little group of houses there." A complete lie. I glanced behind me, "I gotta go. Just.. Don't tell anyone. Please. It's really nothing."
Please, I thought. Just let him agree. I just needed his agreement that he wouldn't say anything to anyone about anything. That's all I wanted. I didn't need my life more complicated.
"I won't." He sighed. As if he really didn't want to agree to that.
"Thank you." I sighed as well. Even if he didn't want to agree, he agreed. That's all I needed, "I'll quit bothering you guys now." I pursed my lips, glancing around before I got moving. Hoping my heart calmed down before I got to my class' table.
Should I have stayed? Made sure he didn't tell anyone? That could have been a bad idea, considering I seemed to just keep getting myself into more trouble.
"Leandra." I glanced back at Alice's call, "Wait." Dear God, what now? My nerves really couldn't take much more.
I waited, watching her dance around the table, and came to stand in front of me. She held her hand up and offered something to me. My eyes widened at what it was, and I looked up at her. I shook my head slowly, refusing the apple she offered. As much as it bothered me to.
"I can't." I murmured, "Really. Thank you, but it's yours."
"I want you to have it." She insisted, "It's okay." I was tempted. I really was, and I probably would have taken it had Mr. Daniels not called to me.
"Leandra." He called behind me, "There you are. It's about time to go." I looked around, noticing the population in the cafeteria had thinned out.
"I can't. I have to go." I told her, "Thank you, though. Really." Her gesture had nearly brought tears to my eyes. I bit them back as I turned.
"Leandra." She spoke again, and I glanced up at her again, "I worry."
"Don't." I replied, "You shouldn't. Not about someone like me."
Before I could cry in front of her, I turned again, and hurriedly made my way to Mr. Daniels' side. Sitting down in the empty seat there with a quiet sniffle.
"I saw that girl trying to give you something to eat." Rachel called from the side, "What? Wasn't your lunch enough? Have to take others too? What a hippo."
I looked down, feeling that edge of my patience coming even closer. I glanced behind me at Alice now back at her table. Jasper's arm around her as she spoke quietly, her eyes on me as well. They were getting ready to go, gathering their stuff, probably to make it to their next classes ahead of time.
"I never took it." I said, looking forward again, "So shut your face."
"Too good for other people's food now?" She countered. I chose not to reply. If I would have acknowledged her comment, I would have burst into tears, and started beating on her as I did so.
This day was proving challenging to me, and we'd only just finished lunch.
Watching as Alice and Edward's group left their table behind, and started toward the door, I couldn't help noticing how much kindness I'd seen from them. Alice didn't have to keep talking to me during her class. Edward and Jasper didn't have to follow me outside. Even if that was partially what made me so nervous.
Alice still in Jasper's embrace led the way from the cafeteria. I sniffled again. I half looked forward to seeing Edward next class, but I was also very nervous about it.
I'd be in the same room with him, giving him a chance to look at my bruise some more. I knew as well as anybody that once someone saw something, it couldn't be unseen. If only he knew that wasn't the only one on me. He'd for sure freak out if he knew about the others. I wouldn't be able to talk him out of telling anyone about the others.
I frowned, watching his steps falter just a bit on his way by a few tables away. Like he wanted to stop, but quickly decided against it just as he was stopping. I wondered if he was okay, worried now. I eventually shook it off, watching after him and his group, figuring he probably just stumbled over a backpack someone left on the floor. I'd done that before. Or he thought he saw a quarter on the floor. I'd done that too.
We followed them not long after. The groups once more splitting up once the bell rang. Leaving my group to head into the next building to visit the biology class. Mr. Daniels paused outside a door, opening it slowly for us. The rumbling of talking slowly died as we made our way in, the class' eyes on us. I looked around at all the eyes watching us. As with every other class, some looked happy to see us, others looked annoyed.
I sighed, rubbing my eyes tiredly. Wincing a little, and choosing to just rub my right eye instead. My stomach growled, reminding me what I'd just missed as we waited.
We stood at the front, again waiting for the class of high schoolers to get into their groups. I met Edward's eyes and smiled a bit. I waved, and he returned it. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Rachel's eyes on me.
I was chosen first this time, and of all the groups, Edward's was the one that got me. Why did that relieve me? I walked over almost happily. I chose the seat beside another boy, closest to the wall. Settling into the chair slowly, I looked up.
"Hi again, Leandra." Edward greeted me almost loudly. I looked over at Rachel's wide eyed expression at witnessing Edward calling me by name. I almost burst out laughing as I pictured her imploding in jealousy.
"Hi, Edward." I replied, turning and smiling back at him.
I kneeled up in the middle of the chair, my elbows on the table. I found this position felt better, ensuring my back stayed away from the hard plastic back of the chair.
Unfortunately, Rachel was in the group just beside mine. Her table in front of this table, and our chairs only inches apart. I scowled at the table as she shoved my chair out of the way, nearly dumping me out of it, so she could pull hers out directly behind me.
"Jesus, fat-ass." I yelped, looking back at her, "Calm down over there. The cake is down the hall." Both of our groups started laughing as she glared at me.
"A-At least I own more than one shirt." She snapped back at me. Didn't she have any other insults?
"Too bad they're all size 'Tent'." More laughter around us. Even Edward was smirking at the look on her face, "Aww hey, don't get mad." I said, laughing a little myself, "It'll be okay. They'll make more fabric one day, and your mom can take you shopping again."
"At least I don't need my brother to say hi to me to try and make people jealous." She huffed. I looked confused at Edward before looking back at her. She thought he was my brother? I mean sure, we did have the same hair color, maybe his a little darker, but that was it.
"I don't have a brother." I told her, "We don't even look alike."
"Sure." She drew out the word, and again, I wanted to hit her.
"Really," I laughed instead, "I'm an only child."
"See? Even what siblings you could have had can't stand to be around you."
Okay, that stung a bit. I almost told her it was because my stepdad preferred me over my mom that way, just to see what she said to that, but I bit my tongue. Instead of replying to what she said, I just rolled my eyes and turned back to the table. She grinned in triumph and sat down.
I righted my chair when she was seated, tucking it in more. I wouldn't want a brother from Jack anyway. No doubt he'd be spoiled rotten, and be just like him. I didn't need another Jack in my life. One was more than enough.
I sighed, looking up and around.
"So.." I said, "Biology." Edward looked angry again, but I didn't point it out. A girl beside him smiled my way.
"I'm Bella." She said, reaching her hand across the table. I reached out and shook it. The stretching motion set my back into a deep, throbbing pain, but I ignored it the best I could.
"Leandra." I said.
"You're pretty quick with those come-backs." The boy sitting to my left said. I laughed bitterly, shaking my head.
"I just can't stand dumb-asses like that thinking they're the brightest thing since the light bulb." I gestured over my shoulder. I laid my weight on my arms, and scooted the chair closer to the table with my feet, still kneeled in it.
Having heard what I said, Rachel roughly shoved her chair back, hitting the back of her chair into the back of mine. I winced heavily as the motion shoved my chair forward, slamming my ribs into the table in front of me and pinning me there. I lost my breath for a second, wincing hard in pain.
"That hurt, you stupid fucking cow!" I snarled back at her when I recovered, spinning as much as I could, "Back up before I knock your goddamn teeth out." I ignored the shocked eyes on us now, having gained the attention of the entire class.
"Leandra." Mr. Daniels scolded me from across the room, "Watch the language."
"Yeah, Leandra." Rachel told me, "Watch the language. I'm awfully sorry if that hurt. I just forgot you were there." Her tone was dripping with false innocence. Slowly, painfully slowly, she scooted her chair in, and I pushed mine back, whimpering as I did so. That really hurt.
"Here." Bella offered, starting to clear off the area of the table against the wall, "Sit up here-"
"No." I said quietly, "I'm okay."
"Are you sure?" She asked, and I nodded.
"She knows if she does it again, I'll beat her ass." She laughed in response.
"You wouldn't dare." She said, looking back at me, "We both know that I won that fight this morning. You cried like a baby for like an hour. So you can just deal with it." I grit my teeth and looked down.
"I only cried because your smell makes me want to puke. You should try showering once in awhile." That shut her up. Gasping offendedly, she turned forward again.
"Okay," The boy beside me laughed, "You are officially my favorite fourth grader."
"Thanks." I muttered, keeping my eyes down. I didn't like insulting others. Normally, it made me feel as bad as I was trying to make them feel, but if she was going to insult me, I wasn't going to take it lying down.
I looked up across the table, spotting Edward watching me closely. I quickly looked back down, sighing heavily. I turned my head to the side, hiding that side of my face from his gaze. The wall on the far side of the room suddenly became so incredibly fascinating.
"I do shower." Rachel grumbled behind me, regaining my attention.
"No, no." I said, "The point is to shower more than once a week. Or else you start smelling like a moose." Again, both groups laughed, and I turned forward again.
"Yeah," Rachel said, "I guess you're right. Who on earth would ever want to smell like your mom?" She shuddered, and her group laughed louder than they had before. That had hit a nerve.
"Ouch." The boy beside me chuckled, shaking his head. My cheeks blushed, and I glared at the table.
"What?" Rachel asked among the laughter, "No come-back?"
"Leandra?" Edward's voice had me look up, my cheeks burning in embarrassment. I couldn't speak yet, as I was seconds away from turning around and hitting her.
"Back to work, guys." The high school teacher said, having made his way over, "Come on. Stop arguing." I took a deep breath, calming down enough to speak. I did have a come-back in mind, but I needed to calm down first. Just so my voice would be steady enough.
"Yeah. Let's get off of the subject of moms." I mumbled eventually, "I can't say anything about Rachel's mom." I turned, looking at her.
"That's right." She grinned.
"After all, I don't even know the guy." I finished, and the look on her face was priceless.
The deafening laughter that resulted from every group in the class now made me feel a little better. Satisfied with her silence, and her suddenly flushed cheeks, I turned forward again. Smiling down at the table.
A/N: A little more added to this one. Not much different, but added to. :)
Since I'm releasing this right after the first chapter, and this is normally where I'd be thanking the reviewers for leaving their thoughts, I'll hold off on that until the next release, but I'll definitely appreciate seeing them. :D
Hope you enjoyed this one too.
Until three! :D