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Memories of a Teenage Amnesiac
WINTER
A blonde haired girl sits alone by the sparkling blue fountain. All around her are voices of chatter and happiness, and even laughter. Makes her wonder if she'll ever feel this way.
Looking around, she sees little kids playing games of tag with one another, laughing as if there's not a care in the world.
Makes her wonder if she was ever like them...back then.
These days, she's been having these strange dreams, of going on adventures with three other people...and a blue cat...?
However, she can't see their faces for some reason, but all she saw were their hair. One had red hair, one had a dark raven hair, and the one she was mostly attracted to was the guy with pink hair. Why?
She isn't sure herself. However, all she knows that these string of dreams are no coincidence.
They say that dreams mean something, and whatever it is, Lucy is determined to find out. All she seeks for are answers, but once she gets them, will she happily accept it?
We never know what the future holds in store for us, but for those like Lucy, she will definitely find out one way or another.
But what do these dreams mean?
Sighing to herself, she quickly makes her way back to the café she works at for now. It is Winter, and looking at the sky, it looks like a snowstorm is on it's way to Hover Town.
White snowflakes dance and swirl in the air, before finally making their way to the ground. Every single one of them is unique, and no two are alike. After looking and admiring them for a while, the brunette snapped.
"This is bull! There's no f*cking way Lucy is dead. And besides, even if she is, stop crying Natsu!"
"I'm not crying Cana! I'm waiting for this f*cking storm to pass so I can leave and look for her!" He shouts at the brunette, as Erza makes her way over.
"Natsu... Lucy's death may have an impact on you, but you're not the only one. You should learn to move on... She will always be in our hearts, so stop blaming yourself. You've been gone for a long time just searching for her, but think about it... If she's alive don't you think she would've came home by now?" Erza says.
"Yo she's right man. Look, we spent a long time looking for her, but she's gone... Not even her body is to be found..." Gray says sadly.
Natsu's body starts heating up, and dangerous wisps of fire surrounding him. "Doesn't mean we should give up," he says with anger.
Observing each movement, Cana takes out her deck of cards. Flipping each card, she reads the outcome.
After getting an answer, she chuckles.
"Natsu, Lucy is alive. I know it."
Only to earn a glare in return. "Of course she is! I'll find her!"
Taking a gulp of her liquor, she kicks the empty barrel to the side, and leaves the guild.
"Hello, welcome to Coco Café! May I take your order?"
"Aw come on girl, don't cha remember me?" The brunette laughs, before standing up and hugging the poor, confused girl. "I missed you Lucy. I knew you were alive."
Confused to why this stranger was suddenly hugging her, she starts to panic.
"I-I don't know you! Get off me before I call the cops!" She shouts, getting her keys ready.
Taking it as a joke, the brunette laughs. "Sure, sure, it's good to see you too."
"Loke do something!" Lucy shouts, waving a golden key in the air.
Shielding her eyes from the golden, blinding light, the brunette comes face to face with a spirit she hasn't seen for so long.
"Damn this girl. Loke tell her I'm harmless!" She says, as Loke's eyes widen. Jaws drop, and Lucy just wonders with curiosity.
"Cana? How did you find us?"
The brunette who Lucy noted was Cana, waved a deck of tarot cards in the air. "Hello? Magic?"
Loke sighs.
"Well here's the thing. How do I say this... Um Lucy lost every single memory of you guys... Fairy Tail I mean. Sorry Cana..."
Cana's eyes widen, as she realizes what this means.
"What? You're joking right!"
Loke sighs. "No it's serious. Look, I can't risk losing her again, so just act normal," Loke hisses, pulling Cana away from Lucy.
"Why aren't you doing anything about it?!"
But Loke simply just sighs, "What can I do? She may not have the same memories, but she's still the same girl deep inside."
"So you're just leaving her like this?" She whispers.
"Letting her heal slowly. Her memories will come back naturally... I hope," he tells her.
Letting out a dramatic sigh, Cana nods, understanding the situation. "I'll make her get her memories back. Trust me Loke. I'll just treat her like the same Lucy she was, and bring her to Fairy Tail."
Shaking his head, Loke sighs. "Good luck with that. Look, she requested for a fresh new start so I'm just going to have to obey her orders. I do owe her my life after all, but if you can bring her to remember, then... Well... Let's just say good luck to your crazy ideas."
Cana chuckles. "Don't worry, I got it all under control."
Meanwhile, after serving a few other customers, Lucy walks back to the two.
Hearing a tune in her head, Lucy shakes her head.
It didn't work, for the music started to get a little bit louder, and she looks around to see who is the source.
"Hey can you guys turn the music down?" She asks, looking at Cana and her spirit.
"What music? There's no music," Loke says, as Lucy scrunches her face with confusion.
"Hey Lucy. I know you have amnesia and all that crap, but how about I offer you a deal," Cana says, and Lucy tilts her head.
"What's the deal?"
"Come with me to visit a place of your past. In return, I'll owe you a big favor. After all, I was once part of your past. Just think about it Lucy," Cana says, taking a gulp from a water bottle that looked like it was filled with...alcohol?
Lucy bites her lip, unsure if she should trust this Cana girl.
Reaching into her pocket, Cana pulls out two things.
"Here's the paper with the address to the hotel I'm staying at in case you agree. And here's a picture of you and Natsu together with Happy. If you ever feel down, just remind yourself that those two morons will always be by your side, and if you ever get lost, just visit them. They miss you, you know?"
And with that, Cana steps out of the café, and into the freezing snow of Winter.
She has a week to decide whether she should take Cana's advice, and for now, she's on the no side.
After all, is she ready to face the reality of her past? She had just gotten used to this odd lifestyle, and she doesn't want to leave just yet.
Perhaps she should go apologize to Cana, and tell her no.
Yes, as, that is exactly what Lucy is going to do tomorrow morning. For now, she has a job to finish if she wants to stay in that small house of hers.
Rent was very important to pay you know.
"Ooh welcome, welcome to my hotel room. So~ you got an answer for me?" Cana asks, tossing the empty champagne bottle in the trash before opening a new one.
"I'm really sorry Cana, but I don't want to go back. I don't want to see them with lost memories," She tells her, before Cana frowns.
"Are you serious...?"
Lucy nods, and apologizes once more.
"You know, the old Lucy would've taken this opportunity to find out more about her past. Maybe this amnesia crap changed you too," Cana says, before Lucy raises an eyebrow.
"The old Lucy? Well I don't know about you, but you should learn that people change," she says annoyed.
Cana put her hands up in the air. "Okay okay, . I got a week here in this place and if you ever change your mind, you know where to find me," she says, pointing at herself. "Although I might not be here the whole time."
Lucy sighs. "Okay sure. My shifts going to start soon, and if I were you, you should buy some jewelry here. Hover Town has the latest jewelry stores, and they're awesome you know," she says, offering a friendly advice.
Cana laughs. "Naw, I'm gonna check out the bar a few blocks away from here I saw earlier. Remember... Second thoughts? Come find me," she says, and Lucy smiles.
Walking out of the hotel, she thinks about this girl Cana who claims to be an important person from her past.
Perhaps she should take her advice. Maybe it isn't so bad after all.
All throughout her work, she can't seem to get Cana out of her mind. Feeling the Winter air from the doorway when the customer opened the door, she notes that Winter is her least favorite season.
After all, summer is so much better,and so much warmer. The idea of warmth makes her smile a little inside, and she can't help but miss the warmth of someone... But who?
This, she doesn't really know.
Probably someone from her past, she decides.
Pulling the picture that Cana gave her, she looks at it. In it, she was smiling happily, with a guy in pink hair looking at her with happiness and affection. Above them was a flying blue cat that was smiling deviously, as if planning something.
In the picture, she looks so carefree... So happy... As if she was the best she can be...
If only she can feel like that again, if only she had her memories back, if only...
"Lucy! Help me serve table 4 please. Gotta use the bathroom. Be right back!" Another employee says, and Lucy snaps herself back to reality.
Placing the picture back into her pockets, she goes back to the real world.
"Okay girl, I have given you a week to decide and the decision's been made. Let's go Lucy!" Cana shouts, dragging Lucy with her.
5:00am and Cana hasn't had her liquor yet. Must be why she's so cranky.
Dragging Lucy by the wrist, the girl struggles to get out of Cana's grasp.
"Didn't you say it was my decision? I already told you no thanks... Ow! Hey! This is kidnapping! I can get you sued for this you know!" Lucy shouts, protesting.
Stopping in her tracks, Cana raises an eyebrow at Lucy.
"But will you really get me sued? And girl, no worries. You'll thank me for this one day," Cana says, picturing herself as a heroine.
Grumbling, Lucy trails after Cana and gets on the train with her.
"Don't even try to think about escaping. I will have the windows locked and don't worry, I spoke to your boss already. She's fine with it!" Cana tells her, and Lucy's jaw dropped.
I guess you can say this is how she ended up on the train, heading to Magnolia. A place where her secrets lie.
A place where her past is buried.
After a while of silence and watching the never ending soft snow drift from the windows, Lucy speaks up.
"Hey Cana, how was my past like?"
The brunette looks at her in confusion. "I thought Loke told you everything?"
Lucy shakes her head, "I mean, things like boyfriends and such. Did I have a boyfriend? Do I have a pet?"
"Nope. No boyfriends. And you owe tons of cats. Back then we'd call you an old cat lady," Cana says, before bursting out with heavy laughter after seeing her friend's face.
"What?!"
Laughing, Cana takes a sip from her wine.
"Aw come on, I'm kidding with ya. You got a little pet named Plue... That spirit of yours with a carrot nose, and no boyfriend. Although you and Natsu seem to be really close recently...well before all this happened that is..." Cana says, smirking.
For some odd unknown reason, a blush starts making it's way up Lucy's cheeks.
Hiding the blush, she lifts her scarf a bit higher, and looks away, out the window, where the soft unique snowflakes swirl around before hitting the ground.
"I-I doubt it."
Cana laughs, and simply makes herself comfy for the long train ride.
There it is again, Lucy notices.
The song. The beautiful little rhythm that she hears over and over again.
And louder. It starts to get louder.
Who is playing this music?
"Cana please stop. Please lower the music. It's too loud," Lucy says, using her hands to cover her ears.
The brunette frowns. The music? What music? She doesn't hear anything at all.
"Uh are you hearing things?" She asks, unsure of what to do in a situation like this.
Hey, she may be able to tell fortunes but that doesn't mean she knows what to do with...this kind of stuff.
Well that's nice.
"Um no, the music. Don't you hear it?" Lucy asks. "It sounds nice, but... It's a bit too loud."
"Uh haha, um there's no music Lucy..." Cana says, panicking.
"Do you hear it? The words I'm not too sure, but the rhythm is nice along with the melody... Oh forget it!" Lucy says, and Cana nervously laughs.
"Aha yeah uh... Okay then..." She nervously laughs, "let's hope master can fix her," she mutters under her breath.
Stepping out of the train while humming a song she constantly hears in her head, Lucy looks around and points out the differences between Magnolia and Hover Town.
Not very different, but still.
Feeling the cold, frosty snow melt on her arm, she takes a deep breath, breathing in the minty smell of Winter.
Trees covered in white as if the snow is a blanket, she tries not to touch it or it might ruin nature's artwork, or so she liked to call it.
Looking around, humming the song, Cana tells her to be quiet.
"Shh. Let's surprise the guild," she tells her, and Lucy nods.
"Hey Cana, what's the guild like?" She asks, looking at a tall building that had the name Fairy Tail on it.
"Crazy, fun, wild, you name it. It's awesome though, you can't argue with that!"
Taking a deep breath, Lucy follows Cana.
Winter boots make crunching noises in the deep snow, as the two make their way towards the guild.
Each breath Lucy takes, she notices the 'smoke' puffing out, and feels her cold, frozen fingers.
Opening the door roughly, Cana laughs. "Welcome home Lucy!"
At the mention of her name, the guild falls strangely silent, before jaws begin to drop.
A redhead and a raven head stands there frozen, staring at Lucy as if they'd seen a ghost. It was strangely still, and the only thing that seemed to be moving was the soft snow that drifted down outside the guild, falling to the ground silently and slowly.
"L-Lucy?!"
Her eyes drift to the boy who had made the first move. Pink hair, scaly scarf, odd clothing, he seems to be the boy that was in the photo Cana had given her.
"Are you Natsu...?" She asks, a voice as soft as the snow outside.
"LUCY! I KNEW YOU WERE ALIVE!" He shouts, before running over to her.
Frozen, and still in shock, Lucy stands alone, as still as she can, with wide, confused eyes. Running over, Natsu was about to give her a hug, when she feels a sharp pain in her ears.
Music.
There it is again.
Louder. It is getting louder with every step he gets closer to her.
"STOP! D-don't get near me!" She shouts, and the pink haired boy freezes.
Stopping in his tracks, he looks at her with confusion.
"Huh?"
"STOP! The music! Make it stop!" She shouts, with one hand clutching her head and the other hand holding onto the wall for balance.
The music is blasting in her ears now.
How can no one hear it?
"What are you talking about?! There's no music! You're still as weird as ever!" Natsu says, brushing it off, hoping everything is okay with her.
"Shh. Let it flow softly. If it's too loud you can't enjoy it," Lucy whispers, her voice becoming one with the snow.
"Natsu, stop. Don't scare her. According to Loke, she has amnesia," Cana says, before the redhead snapped.
Banging her hand on a nearby table, she looks at Cana straight in the eye.
"Amnesia?!"The redhead shouts, as Lucy jumps a little, at the sudden scream.
"What's that...?" Natsu asks.
"It means she doesn't remember us, you dumb*ss," Gray says.
Ignoring the insult he mentioned, Natsu speaks. "No! That's not possible, Lucy remembers us, right Luce?" He asks, hoping Cana was joking.
Crossing her arms, Cana raises an eyebrow. "Same person, just lost memories."
"I'm sorry," Lucy speaks.
As the crowd remains silent, a white haired woman comes over. Placing a hand on Lucy's shoulders, she speaks up.
"It's not your fault Lucy. We can always help you regain your memories. Why don't you stay with us for a while and let us help you," the woman says. "I'm Mira by the way."
Lucy smiles at this woman, and realizes that the music is getting soft now, and a lot more enjoyable.
"I'll think about it."
"Oh no no no! Last time I said that to this girl she ended up making the wrong choices. Had to drag her here," Cana says, and Mira giggles.
"It's good to have you back Lucy," The redhead says, after a moment of shock.
The raven haired boy nods. "Yup. I'm Gray, she's Erza. And you probably already know the moron Natsu," he says pointing to Natsu.
"It's not permanent. I still haven't made my choice yet," she reminds them, but they call smile.
One by one, giving her a small hug, as well as a paragraph of confessions by a bookworm names Levy, Lucy smiles, and thinks to herself. Maybe she'll stay.
A pink haired guy comes and runs up to her, and in that moment, she hears the music again.
Its loud.
It's getting louder.
"Please stop! The music! You're making it too loud!" She shouts, letting everyone believe she's crazy.
"Natsu stop!" Master Makarov shouts, as Natsu looks at Lucy with hurt on his face.
"Luce..."
"It's only natural for amnesiacs to experience these symptoms. I don't know why you're the cause, but let her heal Natsu. It may hurt you, but just do it," Makarov says.
"No, you're wrong!" He shouts, running over to Lucy.
Clutching her head, she feels tears rushing to her face. The music, it's too loud. It's making her head hurt. It's tearing her up emotionally.
Getting closer, he extends his arms and holds a shaking Lucy in his arms.
For a second, it's as if time has stopped altogether. For a second, she feels warmth, something that feels nice. For a second, they looked at one another in the eye. For a second, they smiled at each other.
For a second, they felt love.
But as Lucy knew all too well, everything ends.
The music in her ears got louder and louder. The pain in her head increased, as she starts to shake.
Then scream.
And in that instant, Loke comes bursting through the gates, and punches Natsu away from Lucy, to keep her from breaking.
And when they let go of one another, she saw an image.
No, perhaps it was a scene.
There was a cliff. There was a girl with blonde hair. Is that...her?
The blonde was falling, falling down into the unknown. Falling down the cliff.
Screams. Bloody screams. People yelling her name...Lucy...
Tears shed...
And music... The one she keeps hearing in her head.
"Please," she pants, gasping for air. "Let me go!" She pants, sitting on the floor, holding on to the wall for balance.
"Lucy-San..." Everyone looks at Wendy who tries to hold back tears.
"Are you...okay?" Lisanna asks, afraid to move.
With wide eyes, and shaky breaths, she slowly stands up. Backing away from the guild as if she's seen a ghost, she turns around.
And runs.
Run, run away. Away from the past and away from her once family.
But nobody follows her, afraid to move. Except one.
Standing up, Natsu is about to follow her when Erza and Gray grabs hold of his arms.
"Running after her is not going to help. Don't kill her in the process," Erza says.
"Nobody go after her. She needs time to rest," Makarov says, trying to stay calm.
"I won't kill her," Natsu says in a dark tone. "I just... I just miss her," he says, his voice breaking.
Crying and Natsu Dragneel don't mix, unless if it involves Lucy.
Using his strength, he struggles against Erza and Gray's grasp, but it was no use.
"Stop Natsu. Don't go after her," Cana says, and a ring of fire surrounds him, as he gets mad. Attempting to make a run again, Freed traps him in runes.
"She will come back Natsu. I know it. It says it in the cards," Cana says, and tosses the cards to the floor.
"For now let's wait until her return. I don't want to make things worse than it already is," Gray says, and once more, the guild turns silent.
Still as snow, nobody dares to move.
And that is all Lucy hears, before she leaves the front door of the guild. Bolting to the nearest train station, buying a ticket, with a tired Loke running after her, she enters the train.
"I'm sorry Natsu..." She whispers into the silent sky.
Unsure of why she said those words, she feels tears escaping through the corner of her eyes, and sniffs, breathing in the smell of Winter.
Winter, she decided is not her favorite season. The same goes for Natsu, for Winter is the season that he let her go.
But next time they meet, he will surely keep her safe and sound with him.
Lucy on the other hand, has no plans of returning. She simply just ran away from her past, and has no intentions of turning back no matter what Cana's cards had said.
Looking around, all she sees is white.
"Hey Loke. White's such a pretty color, don't you think?"
"Well in a way, yeah I can see that," he replies.
White.
The color of innocence and purity.
She was innocent, she was pure. She decided she likes the color white. Just not the season it's associated with.
Humming the same song, Loke looks at her with curiosity.
"Sing it. You have a nice voice," he tells her.
Giggling, Lucy starts to sing in a soft voice.
Somewhere over the rainbow way up high,
There's a land I heard of once in a lullaby,
Somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream,
Really do come true ~
"I only know the first part," she tells him, before Loke nods and smiles.
"I'm sure you'll go over the rainbow one day. Then you will have your happy ending," he tells her, and she just shrugs.
Maybe one day she will have her happily ever after.
One day she will travel far, over the rainbow to a land far away. A place with blue, clear skies, where nothing is as confusing as it is now.
Someday her dreams will come true. In the land far, far away.
Someday.
Maybe...
If only.
Looking out at the freezing white snow, Natsu kicks a pebble blocking his way.
He misses her.
Now she's out of his life once again.
Hurt. All he feels is hurt.
And this hurt almost as much as it did when Igneel left.
It hurts to know that the girl you love is leaving you.
It hurts even more knowing that he lost someone he never truly had. Sad that he lost someone who probably doesn't miss him back.
Anger. Frustration. Sadness.
He doesn't know how to deal with these emotions.
It's like losing Igneel all over again... Except this time it's with Lucy...
"I miss you a little
I guess I could say
A little too much
A little too often
And a little bit more every day"
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