I'm... What?
(Buffy's POV)
"Um... look... I think I know what you've been thinking, and I just think you should know... it's not STDs or anything like that. I'm not really sick or anything, and other than having nightmares every night about the... about the rape, I'm just fine... It's nothing physically wrong with me, it's just..." She falls silent, and the tears are back again. "Everything's gonna change, B. Everything. Nothing's ever going to be the same for me. And... if you stay with me... and I'll totally understand if you don't wanna stick around after I tell you this-"
"Faith, stop right there. I'm not going anywhere, so you just push those thoughts out of your mind, okay? I'm not going anywhere. I told you I'd be here for you, so that's exactly what I'm going to do. Because I love you, Faith."
She nods, but still doesn't look sure. "But, anyway... if you decide to stick around... it's all gonna change for you, too, B."
"Why does anything have to change? Whatever it is, we'll make it through."
"Because... I'm pregnant, B..."
...
"You... You're... You're... what?"
Faith nods, her eyes clenched shut. "Yeah." She whispers. "That was pretty much my reaction, too, when the doc told me. I'm... I'm pregnant."
We're silent for a long time as I try to figure out how to say what I need to say without things going badly.
Finally, I take a deep breath, rubbing my palms on my knees nervously. "What... What are we gonna... you know... do about it?"
"What do ya mean, Buffy?"
"I mean... What are we going to do? Are we going to... abort? Are we going to take it to full-term and give it up for adoption? Are we going to keep it? What are we going to do?"
Faith does something right then that I definitely don't expect. She smiles. And it's a sincere smile, too.
"What?" I ask.
"You said "we", B."
I smile back and pull her in for a tight hug. "Of course I said "we", Faith. We're in this together. Whatever you choose, I'm here for you."
She nods, but pulls back with a frown.
"What... What if I do decide to abort?"
I flush, heart sinking. It's not that I was looking forward to raising a child. Of course, it's not that I wasn't looking forward to it, either. I'm just... I'm only seventeen, but... Anyway, it's not that I was looking forward to raising a child, but I am totally against abortion. Still... Faith's been through so much already, and having the child of the man who raped her might be too much for her. It should be her decision, but I'm definitely not going to be happy about it if it comes down to it.
I clench my eyes shut and sigh. "It's your decision, Faith... And I'll support whatever you choose. Doesn't mean I'll be happy if you decide to abort, but I will support you."
She nods and tears up. "I'm not gonna abort, B." She says, and I can't help the sigh of relief that escapes. "I'm totally against abortion. I mean, it doesn't have a heartbeat yet, but... it's a life that's growin' inside me. I'm growin' a human being inside me, B. Way I see it, I decide to abort, it'd make me a murderer. Be even worse than killin' someone out there on the streets, too, 'cause this little guy wouldn't even know what's goin' on yet."
"Faith... You have no idea how relieved I am to hear you say that." Faith smiles.
"Sorry about the test, B... I just... I had to be sure."
"I know. I get it." I smile back. "So, did I pass the test?"
"Failed miserably." She jokes, and I'm glad that the mood is light enough that we can be jokey now.
I lean in and kiss her softly. "So. Abortion is off the table. What are we going to do?"
"I don't know." Faith whispers, the light atmosphere gone. "I don't know. I figure, I'm gonna see this to term, no matter what. I've got about nine months to make a final decision."
"We." I correct. "We have nine months to make a decision. I'm serious about being with you the whole way. But if we're going to see this baby to term, then that means you're going to have to take things easy. Especially on the alcohol and smoking front."
"I don't drink or smoke, B. Don't gotta worry about that." She smirks.
"Okay, good... But... it also means no fighting, and nothing too strenuous, either. I've heard that exercise is good for pregnancy, but not to overdo it. Also going to have to dial down the junk food, and eat more fruits and vegetables. Protein is going to be an absolute must, of course. And we can't have you being too stressed out or anything, either, so we're going to have to find some way of keeping you in calm surroundings, and..."
[Omniscient POV]
Faith smiles at Buffy as she goes on and on about what all they would have to do to keep the baby healthy. She just watches her, not really listening to what she is saying, only paying attention to the fact that she is saying it, saying "we" every time. Falling more and more in love with her with each second.
Suddenly, she leans forward and silences Buffy, capturing the blonde's lips with her own. Buffy freezes in surprize, then leans into the kiss, her lips moving slowly against Faith's. Faith's tongue swipes along Buffy's bottom lip , and both mouths open as their tongues embrace each other. Buffy straightens herself out and pulls Faith down on top of her, groaning when one of Faith's legs accidentally slip down between hers, her thigh pressing against her center, which quickly responds.
Faith's smile turns to mischief, and she presses down harder on Buffy's sex with her thigh, causing Buffy to pull away and groan again, louder. It's hard for Buffy to believe that this is the same Faith that, only an hour and a half ago, was so timid and shy in the shower. Buffy loves both Faiths equally, of course, but this one has her total attention right now as she grinds herself down on Faith's leg, desperate for some friction.
The brunette shifts a bit so she's straddling Buffy's leg, and she starts a rhythm against her girlfriend, rocking her hips into Buffy's core as she grinds down on her, and soon, both of them are groaning. Finally, Faith pushes herself off of Buffy and throws herself to the other end of the couch, leaving them both trying desperately to catch their breath.
"I'm sorry." Faith apologizes. "I... I didn't mean to... I just got caught up in-"
"Faith, you don't have to apologize. I got carried away, too. Besides... I... I kind of... didn't really want to stop." Buffy admits.
Faith stares at the blonde, still breathing heavily, though now, their breathing has become erratic, and Buffy shivers as Faith's eyes darken dramatically.
"But... I... I thought you said... Just earlier..."
"I know." Buffy says. "But, um... I guess I just... I didn't want my first time to... To be in the shower." She says nervously, fiddling with the bottom button of her shirt. "Save that for later, you know?" She adds.
"You mean-?" Faith starts, but Buffy continues.
"Plus, I mean, that was before I found out my amazingly hot girlfriend was growing a new life inside her." She jokes, trying to lighten the serious mood in the air.
Faith chuckles slightly, then grows serious again.
"But... What are you sayin', Buffy?"
Buffy hesitates, but not because she isn't sure. No, she's certain, but she's worried how Faith will react.
"I'm saying... If you want to... then... I want to... too. Also, I mean. I want to... also."
Faith stares at Buffy for a while before nodding just slightly. It was enough. Buffy stands up and grabs Faith's hands before leading the tall brunette up to her room.
...
Buffy lays down on her bed and pulls Faith down on top of her to rest just between the blonde's legs. They kiss slowly, savoring the moment, taking their time to let the knowledge of what is about to happen sink in.
For Buffy, this is an all new experience. She'd never gotten this far with anyone before. Every second that goes by is new, and Buffy isn't at all sure how to do this. Luckily, however, Faith is more than experienced with this, so she does know what she's doing. At least, that's what Buffy's thinking. That is far from the truth, however.
Faith is every bit as unsure about what she's doing as Buffy, something that hasn't happened since her first time. Ever since she first lost her virginity, Faith has been confident, maybe even a bit cocky about it. But now, she's nervous. She's nervous that maybe she won't live up to Buffy's expectations for her first time. She's nervous that she'll get too caught up in the moment and end up being too rough or fast with Buffy. She's nervous that Buffy might actually only be doing this because she feels sorry for Faith, and just wants to try to make her feel better. That last one is pushed out of her mind, however, because she knows Buffy isn't like that.
But when she pulls back and looks into Buffy's eyes, she knows that no matter what happens, Buffy's first time will be perfect, because she's hopelessly in love with Faith. And Faith feels the same way. So she wants to tell Buffy, and show her.
"Buffy..." She whispers. "I love you."
Buffy gasps and tears up at the words, and Faith is worried that she did something wrong for a minute, until the blonde pulls Faith down for another heated kiss that leaves them both seeing stars.
"God, Faith, I love you so much." Buffy whispers once she's able.
They slowly rid each other of their clothes and crawl under the blankets. Buffy lets Faith stay on top, and the brunette shifts so she's laying snugly between Buffy's legs. She lines her sex up with Buffy's, then relaxes enough to press their clits together. They both let out a sharp breath then, which turns to a moan when Faith presses down a bit harder, so their hips were pressing into each other as well.
Faith lets Buffy relax for a minute before she slowly starts moving against her, rubbing their cores together, setting a very slow pace. Buffy stifles her moans, trying not to seem too eager, but Faith smiles and slows down.
"You don't gotta be quiet if ya don't want to." She whispers and leans down to kiss Buffy passionately as she starts grinding again. This time, Buffy doesn't try to be quiet, she lets the moans fall from her lips as Faith makes her feel things she'd never thought possible before. Amazing, beautiful things. And Faith isn't even going very fast or hard.
It's a struggle for Faith to keep herself under control, keep herself from going too fast or hard, letting Buffy's sounds guide her. When she sounds desperate, Faith speeds up a little, or presses harder. When she sounds anxious, Faith slows down or relaxes the pressure a little bit.
Faith lays down a little more, relaxing her torso enough that she can focus on controlling her hips better, as they keep wanting to go faster and harder. Doing so allows their nipples to brush against each other, drawing another gasp from them both. Buffy is moaning and whimpering almost constantly now, Faith's name falling off her tongue repeatedly, and the brunette in question is loving the sound of it.
Slowly, Buffy felt a pressure building inside her, building, building, building, and the pressure caused her hips to start moving erratically as she drew closer and closer to her finish.
"Let it go, Buffy." Faith whispers in her ear. "Let it go."
And with that, the pressure is released all at once, feeling like an explosion of pleasure deep inside her, and Faith continues to grind down, hard and fast as she tries to prolong it as much as she can, coaxing Buffy's orgasm to its limits. Seeing Buffy come undone like that, knowing that she was the cause, Faith felt her own orgasm rip through her, and despite the pure simplicity of everything, and the amount of experience she'd had with sex, she'd never had a climax so intense before in her life.
Finally, Buffy comes down from her high, leaving her shaking and whimpering and exhausted. Faith sits up, pulling Buffy into her lap and hugging her tightly.
"I got ya, B. I got ya." Faith whispers, soothing her, stroking her hair as she whispers sweet nothings into her ear, and Buffy's shaking arms wrap around the brunette.
"I love you, Faith." Buffy coos.
"I love you, too, Buffy." Faith says back. She holds Buffy like that until her breathing evens out, and the blonde falls asleep, smiling happily as Faith lays her down on the bed. Faith takes up a spot on the bed next to her, wrapping her arms tightly around Buffy and quickly falling asleep holding the girl that Faith is certain is the love of her life. Something Faith had never believed to exist before.