Chapter Notes: Here it is. The CONCLUSION! Drum roll please! There will be both a Gail POV and a Holly POV in this final chapter.

General Notes: All of you who stuck it out with me through all of it. Thank-you. Those of you who review, your time means so much. Thank you.

Editing Notes: all mistakes are mind to own. Subconscious is in italics once again, as are the texts. Yes! There are texts in this chapter! New ones! And as in the last chapter, when there is a '...' in the any of the conversations, it means the person is refusing to answer. So the next line belongs to the next speaker. I do not own either of these 2 ladies, they are the charge of Rookie Blue and only aid me in wanting to write about them.

Chapter 9: Conclusion – Scars & Jokes

Gail's POV

We are made to bleed and scab and heal and bleed again
And turn every scar into a joke, we are made to fight
And fuck and talk and fight again

Ani Difranco

#####

'Forgive me if I am being dense darlin' Oliver said as he pulled a chair closer to your bed, 'But, you had a plane ticket, you were headed to San Francisco...from what you said in my office, this wasn't just a whim. So why, now that she's here instead, are you telling her to go?'

Oliver was one of your favourite people. But when it came to matters of the heart, he was a simple man. Explaining this to him, was going to take some finesse. 'Okay Ollie. Its like this. I was going after Holly for one reason and one reason only, because I love her. She wasn't hurt, or in danger, I just simply missed her and realized that after everything, it was her I wanted to be with. ' You paused and looked at the ceiling, the next words were hard. 'She came because I was dying. Before that, there was nothing. No phone calls, no emails, no texts, not even a fucking post card.' You needed to control your breathing...your chest was still so heavy.

Holly stopped...all previous bravado running back down the hall. You are an ass Stewart.

'That doesn't mean it was easy for her darlin' he caressed her shoulder, in that insanely sweet fatherly way, 'You two need to find out how to start talking to eachother in person. Or you are going to lose. Both of you are going to make the biggest mistakes of your lives...the mistake of not knowing.'

'I texted her.' She blurted out. He looked confused.

'Now?'

'No dumbass, while she was gone.' She paused, gathering her thoughts. Deciding, how much of this she wanted to relive. 'Sorry' she apologized for snapping at Oliver.

'No worries. I know vulnerable Peck is an ass.' He replied with a wink.

She really loved this man. Perhaps more than her own father.

'The day she left, I went to the airport.' She put her hand up to stop the questions.

He settled back down in his chair, and like a patient father, he waited.

'They day she left, I watched her get on the plane, watched the best thing in my life walk straight out of it. ' she sighed. 'She didn't know I was there, silently watching her walk out of my heart.'

Oliver's face softened.

'She was my first time Ollie. My real first time. ' She blew out a long breath and stared at the ceiling. She trusted Oliver and she needed to get this out. If she and Holly were ever going to make a go of this, she needed to talk about her feelings. Ugh, she shuddered, Feelings.

'She was the first person I could be Gail with and trust not to run for the hills. She was the first person I let see me fall apart. The first person I let myself call when I needed help. And she's the first person I really made love to and with. She was my first time for everything.' Tears were gathering in her eyes.

'Take your time darlin' and Oliver handed her the tissue she wasn't mobile enough to reach yet.

'You know when someone says their heart shattered in million pieces?' He nodded 'Well, that day, at the airport, I finally knew what that meant. And when I was falling apart, my instinct had been to tell her, because that's what we do. We tell eachother stuff. So I texted her about the spectacle I was making in the airport over her...I just never sent it. And then it just started to become a thing. I would text her like I used to, whenever there was something I wanted to tell her, I just didn't send them this time. Hundreds of drafts to her sitting on my phone.'

'Wow.' Was all Oliver had to say.

'Yeah. Crazy right?'

He shook his head vigorously. 'No darlin'. Not crazy at all. In fact, it might be the most normal thing you've ever done!'

She laughed. It hurt. 'owwww'

'Sorry. You okay?'

"Yeah, it was worth it.'

'You know what this sounds like to me darlin'

'I'm sure I'll never guess.'

'The one.'

#####

HOLLY's POV

how can I go home
with nothing to say
I know you're going to look at me that way
and say what did you do out there
and what did you decide
you said you needed time
and you had time

Ani Difranco

#####

You were a crumpled mess, just outside. Tears streaming down your face.

Wow, who knew she loved you that much eh?

Apparently NOT ME!

You're a mess

You think? WHY THE FUCK AREN'T YOU SMARTER THAN THIS!

We've been through this-

Yes, simple. I know.

So! How can I help?

By grabbing your cheerful ass and going the fuck away!

Oh no, this is too good to miss. Gail is pouring her heart out in there, no idea that you are sitting out here, eavesdropping, like a child with a glass to the door.

You are such an arse.

Ummm...you want to be the pot or kettle here?

I get a choice?

Well, you are upset and all.

How kind.

I have my moments.

Lets get back to task...?

Kettle...

Kettle it is. Gail has just pretty much confessed that she thinks you might be the one.

Noooo, that's what Oliver said.

Did you hear her protest?

Doesn't mean she didn't shake her head.

OMG! You are so annoying!

Bout time I pissed YOU off for a change

You decided at the waterfront that you were going to fight for her no?

Yes I did.

So what's changed.

Hearing her pain, out loud, hearing that big thumping heart of hers so broken...

You feel unworthy

I do

But what if she's you're 'one' too?

Then I guess I'm going to have to give this a go.

That's my girl! Now pick yourself off this floor-

And march in there-

NO!

What?

You look like someone tried to drown you. Go clean up, if you can even see.

Do I look that bad?

Yes, and gross. You need tissue and some cold water. GO!

Your subconscious had been right. You looked horrible. Worse than horrible, but your vocabulary was failing you, and for some reason, you couldn't actually think of a word that was worse than horrible.

Your pocket was vibrating. You almost ignored it, because you didn't have answers for whoever was on the other end. It was either work, or your family and you simply had no solid answers at this very moment, not until this was sorted. The institutional tile feels cool on your shaking fingers, you don't want to fish out your phone, but you are Holly Stewart, curious like a cat, to a fault, and you have to know.

'You there lunchbox?'

You dropped the phone, luckily, on the floor and not in the sink with the motion detection faucets. THAT would have been awkward, and expensive.

'I'm here.'

'Where is here? Cause I can't come to the airport this time.'

'Seriously Gail, did you think I would just leave?...Again?'

' I all but told you to go.'

'You are not the boss of me and even you don't have the power to tell me to go this time.'

'So where are you?'

'I was at the lake...now I'm in the washroom down the hall.'

'You're texting me while peeing?'

'NO! I'm just freshening up.'

'Relax lunchbox, that was a joke.'

'Right, ok.'

'The lake?'

'Yeah, you know, the one where you wouldn't even look at me while you shredded my heart with your bare hands?'

'Oh, that lake.'

'The very one.'

'Why there?'

'I needed to go back to the moment we decided, or rather you decided, that I wasn't worth it.'

'Holly...'

'No, let me finish.'

'Sorry, ok.'

'I needed to let that pain in, I needed to understand the part I played in all of this and I needed to give my heart a fair shot to speak.'

'And what does your heart have to say?'

'It says I shouldn't have walked away that day. I should have stood there, for however long that stubborn blond head of yours sat there. Until you turned around, until you looked me in the eye and told me to go.'

'I don't think i could have done that.'

'And that is exactly my point. I accepted your words because I couldn't see you. I should have marched over to that damn rock and stood in front of you. Made sure that, stone calm Gail was really there.'

'Stone calm Gail had tears streaming down her face and was working so fucking hard to control her breathing so you wouldn't know. I couldn't ask you to be a part of the huge life changing decision I had made while we were apart, any more than you could ask me to come to SF.'

'So we're both cowards.'

'Hot cowards. Don't forget hot lunchbox.'

'You say the most inappropriate things at the most inappropriate times.'

'Its a gift.'

'Where do we go, from here?'

'Isn't that a line from a Buffy song?'

You giggled 'Awww, you were paying attention when I made you watch!'

'The battle's done, and we kinda won?'

'Now you're scaring me.'

'I'm scaring the nursing staff!'

'OMG, you're singing outloud?!'

'Open the bathroom door and find out...'

And sure enough. Gail's melodic tones were carrying, ever so softly, down the hall. Gail was singing for her.

'Where do we go from here?
The Battle's done, and we kind of won
So we sound our victory cheer
Tell me
Where do we go from here?

You poked your head around the corner and she smiled.

'Why is the path unclear
When we know home is near?'

You smiled back.

'This is going to be hard.' You stated the obvious

'Yep.'

'And we are going to have to talk...alot.'

'Laid up here! Not going anywhere!'

'And we need to make some rules...'

'Yes, yes...later, just later! Get the hell over here and kiss me lunchbox!'

'Gail, you've been in a coma...did you brush your teeth?'

'Holly? You work with dead people!'

'ON dead people! And I don't kiss them!'

'Are you comparing my mouth to a dead person?'

'Well if the breath fits.'

'Hey! I had some cheesepuffs!'

'Well, let me run right over there to kiss "smells like cheesepuffs and coma" mouth!'

And we fade to back as they continue to laugh and cry and fuck and fight and figure out how to live their lives, together.

That's all folks. I really hope this ending pleases. I needed to figure out how to bring the texting back in...you know, since its in the title and all! Thank you for reading. All of you who stuck through one of my first attempts at fanfiction. The good, the bad, the whining!