Hello Friends! What a kind welcome! I'm honored that you've taken time to read this (and review! Oh my gosh! Seriously! No, seriously. NO SERIOUSLY made my day!) I've been a fanfic stalker for years now, and was having a super crappy day yesterday. To cheer myself up, I decided to do something brave (well, brave for me ;) and upload this story that I started a few years ago. I've got 22K words written, and assume that I'm half way through. Thank you for reading and making today so much better than yesterday!

Since the fanfic site is still making sure I'm a real person and not a robot, it won't let me write back to any reviews yet. So let me just say a few things real quick. Some of you noticed that Edward was a bit of a jackass in the last chapter. Yes, yes he was. What's a good love story without a little angsty drama. I LOOOOOVE me some angsty drama. (Not in real life, only in fiction. We are not in High School anymore, my friends. Thank goodness. Unless you are still in High School, and let me just say that life gets sooooooooo much better!)

I'd like to make this a HEA, but I don't know exactly how to get it there. I've got to wrap my head around it a bit. I'd like to update a new chapter every day until I've got y'all caught up (then it'll slow down to a realistic pace), but we'll see if real life cooperates with me. I'm having so much fun, I may just bully real life into doing my will. BEHAVE REAL LIFE. LET ME UPDATE MY STORY!

Ok. Now I will. Let the draaaaaaama continue!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

A few days passed since the Pike Place Market incident, and I let myself believe that's all it was going to be. An isolated incident. Maybe I just imagined it. I should have known my imagination wasn't that good and that he wouldn't just let it go.

It was after dinner on a Thursday. My office was only opened Monday through Thursday, so every weekend was a fabulous 3-day Owen extravaganza. I used the time to relax, do our grocery shopping, and go on toddler-appropriate adventures. But mostly just relax. From the time we got off the bus on Thursday afternoon, it was THE WEEKEND. So imagine my surprise when I opened my front door to an officer, a lab technician, and a warrant for Owen's DNA. While wearing my ratty old yoga pants and a wife beater tank top. And Owen wearing nothing but a spaghetti stained onesie. I know, way to inspire confidence in my mothering skills.

"Bella Swan?"

"Can I help you?" I asked the officer in front of me, balancing a very messy Owen on my hip.

"I'm Officer Black, and I've got a warrant to collect DNA on your son."

I felt myself pale. I opened my mouth. I shut my mouth. I opened it again. "Can…can I see?"

He showed me the paperwork.

Yup.

There it was.

"Oh."

"Can we come in?"

My hand fluttered up uselessly, "Oh. Yeah…. Yes, I'm sorry. Please."

I opened the door. Even though I really wanted to slam it shut and go hide my head in a pillow.

The two men came in. I pointed vaguely at the couch and we sat down. I was totally overwhelmed and it showed. They seemed to take pity on me.

"Don't worry ma'am. This will only take a moment."

As the technician scooched towards us, Owen cowered in my hair.

"I'm sorry," I said. "Is there any way I can do it for you? You just need a swab of his cheek, right?"

"Uh, technically I have to do it, " the lab guy said. I blinked and looked at Owen. He was having none of it, trying to burrow into my side while simultaneously hiding his head in my chest.

"What about it you just watch me try it once, and if it's not enough you can try it."

The tech looked at Officer Black. Officer Black nodded slightly, and the tech handed me a swab.

"Thanks," I said with a sigh of relief. "He really doesn't do well with strangers."

I tickled Owen's side and got him to relax. He giggled, and I quickly swiped the inside of his mouth. I gave it a few more passes. Heaven knows I'd rather be thorough and get this done right the first time. I definitely did NOT want any more officers showing up at my door with warrants. The tech bagged the sample and gave the Officer a look. He nodded in response. They were getting up to go when I said, "Wait. Do you…do you know why he wants this?"

The officer paused and swallowed. "I'm sorry ma'am, I don't."

I did that count-back-from-100 thing and tried not to cry.

"He's not going to try to take Owen, is he?"

The officer just looked sad. I'm sure I looked pathetic. A few tears leaked out and I could feel my cheeks burning with embarrassment. Ugh, I'm sure I was bright red. The officer was feeling REALLY sorry for me now, cause he put his hand on my shoulder and said, "I'm so sorry. I don't know." He paused and handed me his card. "Please. call me if there's …if you have any more questions."

I nodded in return, afraid that if I opened my mouth only my sobs would escape. I was definitely not in control of my emotions. As I closed the door behind them, I knew things had just gone from Maybe Kind of Bad to Pretty Horrible.

This is what I knew:

1. Edward was not happy with me.

2. Edward was questioning the paternity of my child (Really, Edward? Really?)

3. Edward had a lot more money for a lawyer than I did.

4. We were in trouble.

It was a Wednesday night and I was doing laundry. My building was centrally located and had a lot of charm, but was short on amenities like garbage disposals and in-unit washing machines. It was ok though, I had a system down. After dinner and bath, I put Owen to bed. I waited till I knew he was asleep, and then I'd strap on the baby monitor, grab my clothes basket and rush downstairs to the basement laundry room. With the help of the baby monitor I could keep an ear out and make sure Owen was ok while I filled up the washer. I figured I'd hear if someone ever tried to break in, I'd run up there and hit them upside the head with my 15 lb. bottle of detergent. I was only out of the apartment for five minutes to switch the laundry out and nothing had ever happened before. We'd lived in the building for a few months and I felt pretty good about our routine. But just as I finished pulling my load out of the drier, I heard a commotion over the baby monitor. At first I thought it must be the neighbors pounding on the wall. I cursed under my breath as I heard Owen stir and then cry out. I threw everything into the basket and started up the stairs. By the time I got to the lobby, all hell was breaking loose. In between Owen's sobs I could hear someone banging and calling my name. Was my apartment on fire? I took the stairs faster than I ever had before. I swear I made it to our floor in less than 30 seconds. And there was Edward, pounding on my apartment door.

"What's going on?" I asked. I pushed him aside, unlocked the door with a violently shaking hand, threw down the laundry basket, and ran into Owen's room. Edward followed right behind me.

"What the hell, Bella! Where were you? You almost gave me a heart attack!" Edward yelled as I pulled Owen out of his crib. He'd followed me into the room. I gave the laundry basket I'd flung into the living room a pointed glare and then gave Owen my attention. Owen was having none of it, though.

"Mommy, who's dat? Who's dat Mommy?"

"Edward, please, can you just give me a minute?"

He glared. He sighed. His shoulders slumped and he turned around and shut the door. I collapsed with Owen into the rocker and attempted to calm us both. I was 50% effective. Owen's head got heavy as I sang and rocked him. My own head just hurt. What was Edward doing here? He never cared about Owen before. Was it just because he'd never seen him in real life? Once I'd seen Owen, the theoretical love I'd have for him exploded into full-on-head-over-heels love for my baby. The first time we met I was exhausted from 12 hours of labor, he was covered in that gunky white stuff, his head looked like a squashed potato, and he was very angry. But he was so beautiful. It was love at first sight. Owen was no longer covered in Vernix caseosa, his head was beautifully shaped and he had sweet little red curls and big brown eyes. He was much cuter than a newborn. I could see why Edward would want to see him again. I wanted to see him every second of the day. Except when he was supposed to be sleeping. His little body relaxed and I knew he'd miraculously calmed down enough to sleep. I laid Owen's warm, limp body in his crib and covered him with his blanket. I may have been stalling a little bit, but I stood there and smoothed his hair and rubbed his arms for a few minutes. Then I finally turned to go face Edward. He was sitting at the kitchen table, rubbing his face with his hands and looking generally disheveled.

"Can I get you something to drink?" I asked in a quiet voice, hoping to set the tone for our little encounter. I got a little lucky putting Owen down again so quickly. I'm not sure if he'd cooperate with another interruption of his sleep. "I have water, milk or apple juice."

Edward looked amused for the first time. "No thanks. I don't need a sippy cup."

What was this? A joke? I tried to smile, but my face didn't cooperate. I pulled out a chair and joined him at the table. "Edward," I stopped. I took a big breath and tried again. "Edward, what are you doing here?"

He became very still and looked at me. It was his "thinking face". I grew stiff with his appraisal.

"What do you mean? How could this happen? Bella, what did you do?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, genuinely confused.

"You left me. You didn't even discuss it with me. And then I find out that you HAD OUR BABY." His voice got a little louder at the end. I looked nervously at Owen's door. I wondered if I still had that officer's card. I think it was in the junk drawer. Way to be organized, Bella…

I spoke again quietly, trying to keep this calm. "I told you I didn't want an abortion. I must have told you a thousand times. But you didn't listen. How could you not know?"

I think he could hear the genuine confusion in my voice. I have the feeling it kept him from blowing up completely. "I didn't know because you didn't tell me," he said, his voice icy.

"I told you in the letter."

"No, you didn't. All you said in the note was, 'I'm sorry Edward, I can't do this. I had to make a choice. This is the end. I'm sorry for disappointing you. I'm going to stay with Renee for a while and get my life back on track. I've transferred schools. I am not coming back. I will always love you, but this is goodbye."

"Yes, I said it was too hard for me to have the abortion and that I was sorry for disappointing you….wait, did you memorize the letter? Is that what I wrote word for word?"

"And you returned your ring."

"Yes."

He looked at me. I felt defensive. "Didn't Carlilse tell you?"

"What?"

"Carlilse. I gave him the letter and the ring. We talked for a while. He thought I was going to ruin your life. I told him that you could terminate parental rights."

Edward paled. His faded freckles looked stark against his porcelain skin. And then he began to clench his hands into tight fists. He looked more than furious. I put my hand on his arm to calm him, something I'd done a lot when we were together. We'd really only been together four months, but I remembered how to be with him. I remembered who I was to him before I was Owen's mom. I knew how to help him regain his focus. It was strange, like reading a favorite book from your past. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths.

My mind was reeling. He really didn't know about Owen? The past three years I'd secretly been relieved but also resented the fact that he never tried to contact me. Sure, I knew he didn't want a baby, but didn't he even care what his son looked like? I'd felt a hole in my heart when I realized Edward was moving on without me. I felt I'd made an informed choice when I decided to have Owen on my own, but it still hurt that Edward had never proved me wrong. I guess now I understood why. "Edward. I'm so, so sorry, " I whispered. I tried to look him in the eye, but he was staring out the kitchen window. "I…I thought Carlilse told you. I knew you didn't want to have a baby. I thought I was doing what was best. I didn't want you to give up your life because of my decision. I knew you didn't want to be a father, and I wasn't going to force you. I'm so sorry."

He turned to face me now. "You never forced me to do anything, Bella. I'm the one who ruined everything."

I was genuinely confused. "What do you mean?"

"I did. You didn't even want to have sex with me. I talked you in to it. And then you didn't want an abortion, and I forced you into that too. There were other options. We could have figured something out…I've ruined your life," he stopped, overcome with emotion. He continued, his voice breaking, "And you LEFT me. I couldn't understand why you didn't even talk to me about it. I thought we were going to be together forever, but I BROKE you. I made you do things you never wanted, and you left." He bent his head over my kitchen table and sobbed.

It was incredibly awkward.

I swallowed my panic and tried to calm him down. I felt like my carefully built life was beginning to sway in an earthquake. Like any second it would shake down into a pile of rubble. I didn't know if I'd be able to build it up again. "Shhhhh, shhhh, Edward, it's ok. Everything turned out ok. I'm happy with my life. I don't regret anything. Don't worry about things that we can't change."

"Isabella," he responded, his voice muffled in his arms, "I'm so sorry. I can't believe this is happening. How could I not have known?"

I sad there silently. Cause really, what could I say to that? I was kind of on the same page. And the more I thought about it, the more livid I became with Carlilse. But I was pretty sure if we discussed that, things would get loud. So I kept my mouth shut. I was tired. And I had work in the morning. Our problems were too big. I felt a lump of sorrow and futility grow inside me. I just had to get him out of here so I could pull my feelings and shock out and look at them. Look at the disaster this had all turned in to. And then I could figure out where to turn next. I wanted him to leave.

We sat in silence for a while. But it wasn't sweet.

After a little while, Edward pulled himself together. He shuddered and sat up with a sigh.

"So what do you want to do, Edward?" I asked. My head swam with questions. Did he want to see Owen? Did he want anything to do with us? And did we want anything to do with him? And his OBVIOUSLY crazy family?

"I guess…," his words stuck in his throat. " I don't know…. I…. should probably talk to Tanya."

I stayed quiet. But my thoughts must have shown on my face, cause he replied, "Tanya is my girlfriend. We've been dating for about 9 months. She's studying to be a surgeon."

Of course she was. "Is she the one who was with you at Pike Place?"

"Yeah."

"She's pretty." It's the only nice thing I could think to say about this Tanya, who I'm pretty sure already hated me.

"I've been told." I just let that one go.

"Would you like to call me after your talk then?"

"Yeah. I guess that'd be good."

"Edward… You don't need to worry about us disrupting your life. And I didn't mean to run away from you at Pike Place, you were just the last person I expected to see there…"

Edward interrupted me, "Isabella. Please. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Can I have some time to think, to figure out what I'm going to do?"

"Ok," I whispered. That kind of scared me. I wasn't sure I wanted him to do anything.

"I'm sorry," he said. "You both will be in my life. Always. Owen is my son. But I just need to figure out how to do that. How to fit you in. I will. I just need time."

After a moment of silence, I said, "Edward, can I ask you something?" "

Of course."

"Why the paternity test? You didn't think I went off and had someone else's baby, did you?"

"To be honest, I didn't know what to think. When I saw you in the market, at first I thought my mind was playing tricks on me. I've thought I've seen you before. But you were real. And you'd had an abortion. I knew it. I set up the appointment myself. I'd picked the doctor. Carlilse had told me. So who was this boy? Where did he come from? I called Alice, and she's the one who told me to get a paternity test. I think she knew I wouldn't believe it until I saw the results on paper myself."

"Oh." I was so furious with Carlilse. I cringed, realizing that this was Owen's grandpa. Ugh.

After a few more minutes, Edward shook his head and rose. "I guess I'd better go. I….I mean We have a lot to think about."

I stood up too. "Just one more thing Edward. Please."

He looked up.

"You're not…you're not going to try to take Owen from me, are you?" I asked in a small voice. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight unless that option was taken off the table.

His face paled, he looked shocked. "Do you think I would DO that?"

"No. I don't think you would do that on purpose, but I think….I feel like I can't trust your family. And I just need to know. I haven't been able to sleep since I saw you at the market, afraid that the Cullens were going to claim their stolen heir or something."

Anger flashed in Edward's eyes. "No. I wouldn't do that," he replied.

I shrugged my shoulders in response, tired of words, tired of trying to talk. Tired.

He responded by pulling me up into a hug. And by pulling me up, I mean literally. He was a lot taller than me. And in that moment, I remembered exactly what it felt like to belong with Edward Cullen. I reveled in it, breathing in the smell of his neck, and feeling his strong arms around me. But Edward Cullen wasn't mine any more. So I pulled back and he let me go. I walked him to the door avoiding his eyes. I was afraid to look in them. Things were already too strange.

"Goodnight, Bella. I'll be in touch soon."

"Good night Edward," I said, looking at my wall. He left. I shut the door. I went to bed. I cried myself to sleep.