Chapter 11

Collecting the silver chain from the table,
I stepped over his body and to the window.
Swinging my legs out and dropping down to the ground,
afraid to look back at what I destroyed.
Knowing that not only had I destroyed the man I love and his wife.

My own actions had also caused the last part of Isabella Swan

to come undone and I did not know, how to fix myself.

BPOV

I did not look back at Edwards window. Instead I walked to the front of the house, looking up at the moon. It was a faint silver line in the dark sky, a waning crescent. From the scientific books that Carlisle had, I knew this was the last day before a new moon. There couldn't have been a more fitting night for the darkest moment in my life.

There was no going back after what I had done tonight. Just the thought of returning to our house in London, being confronted and judged by Esme and Carlisle. Or worse... comforted and forgiven. The last thought was unbearable.

Before I even stopped to think, the decision had been made. I couldn't bring the burden of my actions into their life, knowing that Esme would try to share my pain. They had their happy life, pretending to be normal people. I couldn't have that life anymore.

Turning my back from the city, I Instead ran towards sea, reaching the cliffs and looking down at the black water. Across the water, countries waited. Places I could stay anonymous and never be found. I took one last breath and closed my eyes.

Without hesitating I took a step forward and let myself fall. The drop was longer than I had anticipated, cool air brushed past me and the salty taste in the air burned my lungs in an unpleasant way. It seemed fitting that after enjoying such pleasure, I was now receiving punishment. Remembering how the green vibrant eyes had welcomed me until Edward had known I was a monster...Finally the force of the water against my body came. I welcomed it, keeping my eyes closed and not fighting the current as it pulled me under and took me out to sea.

I would let it lead me, there was no where I wanted to be.. no where I needed to be.

Exhaling the last of the oxygen in my lungs, I felt my body sink even deeper and pulled into a current. Wherever nature would take me, was good enough for me.

Days later I washed up on shore. Lying on the wet sand I looked up at the dark sky, watching the new moon slowly disappear. My dress was dirty and soaking wet, clinging to my body. So I waited for the sun to come up and dry my clothes. The sun however did not reach me, as the morning came a thick white cloud of mist started to come down. Surrounding me and wrapping around me like a cold blanket. It was exactly the welcome I deserved.

Getting up I started walking away from the water. Using my hearing and smell to navigate through the sandy landscape until I finally felt the first trees against my fingers. The mist was so thick, I could barely see my own hand. Frowning I wondered what place I had washed ashore. After what felt like hours of carefully finding my way in the thick white mist, I gave up. Sitting down I decided to wait for the thick mist to clear up. Resting my hands in my lap, I felt the ring on my finger. Caressing it. Knowing without a doubt, it would no longer have the vibrant green it had for the past 25 years.

Esme had explained it very clear. For as long as both souls are alive, the ring will show you to your true love

My soul was gone, whatever remained had been destroyed the moment I killed Edward, taking his soul away also. Slipping the ring from my finger I raised my hand up and backwards, prepared to throw the painful memory as far away as I possibly could. Ready to let go.

I loved you The pained words flooded back to my memory, together with a flash of vibrant green.

Slowly I lowered my arm, opening my fist to look at the ring. Even with the black stone in the centre, it was still beautiful. Trembling I pushed my other hand in my pocket and collected the silver chain.

On it were both my parents wedding rings, another memory of a loving relation. Still trembling,I added my own ring to them. Carefully bending the lock on the silver chain back in shape and placing the it around my neck again. Hiding the rings under my dress so no one could ever see. Making sure no one would ever ask me about any of the rings.

Not that I wanted to see people at the moment, but at some point I could run into them. Thinking about that, I listened carefully. From far I could hear footsteps, but they were soft and fast. No humans could be this fast, meaning only one thing. Vampires.

Moving to my feet with, I knew I had to run. But where, the area was unknown to me and with the thick mist it was hard to see what direction I was going. Up in the air, hiding in a tree wasn't an option either. Sitting against the tree, I had felt how it had been rather thin and it would probably not be very high. Thinking about my options, the footsteps started to come closer. Listening with more concentration I was sure it was more than one vampire. Maybe two or three.

"Come out... come out where ever you are?"

Standing with my back to the tree, I tried to pull my shield up. Holding my breath as I waited for them to find me. Hoping the stories Esme had told me about vampires usually being very polite upon first meeting was in fact true. If it wasn't, at least I deserved to die.

"Are you sure this is a vampire, she smells weird." A worried voice asked someone else, confirming they were with at least two vampire. Focussing on my gift, I tried to hide my scent.

"What the... Ivan you idiot, you let her get away." A third voice sounded, angry at his friend. His outraged words brought a smile to my face, knowing I had succeeded to pull up my shield and strip myself of the scent they were tracking.

"No I didn't, and stop using my name Kent. Now she knows my name." A loud crack sounded, like something heavy crashing into a tree.

"So I can't use your name... but you can use mine. Now she knows both our names." Another crash sounded, followed by playful laughter and a growl. A third set of feet kept moving towards me with a steady pace.

"Stop it you two immature idiots... she's right there. " The steps became closer until I felt someone standing right in front of me. A hand reached out through the mist. "Aren't you? My lovely."

Grabbing my wrist, the hand pulled me forward. Causing me to crash into the chest of a large vampire. Looking up I could see his bright crimson eyes staring down at me. A cold smile was on his face, examining me like I was some object or a trophy. It caused me to shiver and in response I tried to pull away.

"Let go of me."

Trying to pull away from him, I twisted my body and tried to break free. He just glared at me and held me tighter.

"What is your name?"

His voice sounded cold and uninterested. Could Esme have been wrong? Did nomadic vampires fight each other and kill each other, like animals claiming their territory. Just as I felt fear starting to build up in my body, the mist lifted slightly and I could see the other two vampires.

Unlike the blond haired man that was holding me, they seemed friendly. Both of them had dark curly hair and similar facial features. What surprised me most however was their age, they appeared to be a few years younger than me.

Both of them were staring at me, standing behind the large blond man that was treating me so hostile. Facing him, I stared at his hand around my wrist for a moment before raising my chin and staring him in the eye.

"I could ask you the same." Pushing my chin up in the air, I glared at him. "Who are you?"

Trying to sound as cold as possible, I asked him the same question he had asked me. The two boys, Kent and Ivan elbowed each other and laughed softly. Making me fear for a moment, I'd made a mistake. Then the blond man relaxed his grip and an amused spark showed in his eyes.

Letting go of my wrist he took my hand and bowed, bringing my hand to his lips and placing a chaste kiss on my skin.

"My apologies my lady, you are right, how rude of me. My name is Tristan."

Letting go of me he stepped sideways and pointed at the two boys who now stood up straight with their hands behind their back.

"This is Kent and his brother Ivan."

Kent waved and Ivan just stared at me, earning another elbow from Kent. Quickly he waved also. I smiled at them and nodded.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Curtsying and giving them each a nod. " My name is Isabella."

Giving them my first full name and not my last name, like they had given me. They nodded, repeating my name. As we stood, looking at each other, the air seemed to clear and I finally got the chance to look around. We weren't in a forest like I had thought but in a sandy area with low shrubs and a handful of trees. Glancing around, I was relieved the sun wasn't out. Knowing that there wouldn't have been a place for me to hide, not for miles. I would have been exposed instantly.

"What brings you here Isabelle?" Tristan asked me, the amusement still in his voice.

I shrugged and walked past him, allowing him to follow me. "Nothing really, just passing through."

Continuing to walk, I noticed both Kent and Ivan were following me also and came to walk next to me. "Where are you going?"

I shrugged again, looking straight ahead, refusing to answer them.

"Great." Shouting out loud, Kent turned towards Tristan. "Can we take her with us, can we, can we?"

His excited words made me stop. "Ehm.. no.. wait." Looking past Kent at Tristan, I could see he had that same cold laugh on his face again.

"Yes, why don't we... since we are all going nowhere. Why not travel together." Walking over to me, he stood close to me. "Don't you agree Isabella?"

Stepping back, I bumped into Kent and Ivan. Who, in their enthusiasm had stepped closer also. Turning around I faced them, their eyes like Tristan, a bright red. But their faces were so young and happy. Behind me I felt Tristan step closer, giving me no place to run to without having to fight my way out. Something I had never done in my life and wouldn't start doing at this moment.

Hiding my fear, I managed a small smile. Giving in, for now.

"I guess.. why not."

Immediately I felt a pair of arms wrap around me and my feet lifted from the ground. Twirling around once before being passed like a rag doll to the other brother, he too twirled me around.

"We're going to have so much fun."

Setting me down on the ground Kent and Ivan laughed and pushed me forward, forcing me to follow Tristan who had started to walk out in front of us. I let them. Hoping that wherever they would lead me, could help me forget the hurt I felt inside.

It turned out that Tristan was not the cold man I had mistaken him for. After spending a few weeks with them, his silent moods were something I started to appreciate. Kent and Ivan were in fact brothers in real life. Acting loud and playing jokes on each other. It was both fun to be around and infuriating at the same time. Very rarely they would be silent and a lot of their pranks, were aimed to impress me.

Tristan was silent and kept to himself, while watching them, reigning them in when needed. After a few days, the dynamics in the group had become clear to me. Tristan was the leader, like an older brother or uncle, looking after the boys. He had told me the story behind Kent and Ivan. Decades ago they had been turned together. Left behind by the vampire that sired them, Tristan had found them, alone and confused. He had been a nomad for years but something he could not explain had forced him to take them with him. Explaining this life to them, teaching them all about their new strength and endless possibilities.

From that day forward they had travelled together. He was like a big brother to them, keeping them out of trouble and keeping them safe at the same time. I soon found out, they had a very different approach to humans. Carlisle had always taught me we had a choice ... Tristan, Kent and Ivan did believe this, they also believed that human blood was the right choice. They sought out drunk and lonely travellers, killing them without thought.

The hunt was a game to them. Taunting and teasing their target, slowly driving them mad with fear. In everything they did, they were the opposite from Carlisle and Esme.

And slowly I was started to get sucked into their games.

After the first week, I had gone out and hunted. Ivan had caught me with the deer in my arms, my teeth deep into it's warm flesh. He had said nothing, just stared.

Later he hadn't asked, all he had done was look at my eyes and smile. I had smiled back at him, silently telling him that indeed my eyes were different because my diet.

Tristan and Kent had both commented on my eyes but I had been able to lie and tell them it was part of my gift. My gift was what I presumed the reason Tristan allowed me to stay.

Shortly after joining them, he had confronted me, demanding to explain how I could have hid my scent the day we met. I quickly explained my ability to shield my scent, looks or even limit my own senses. He had been intrigued but relieved, knowing it was a way to defend myself and not a weapon to harm others.

That had been the only time he had asked me to tell anything about me. Only once had he commented about my silence. Gently placing a hand on my shoulder and offering to listen, whenever I felt like talking. The moment had been a turning point for me, starting to trust Tristan, Kent and Ivan from that day forward.

It turned out, they had spoken the truth the day we met. They really did not have a plan or destination. During the evenings and cloudy days we would travel, during the bright daytime we would seek shelter.

I enjoyed the company. But as days turned into weeks, it was getting more and more difficult to find time to sneak away and go hunting. At the same time, the burn in the back of my throat was increasing, rapidly.

One evening we were travelling down a dark country road when the sound of a horse and carriage came up from behind us. Quickly Tristan explained the plan.

He wanted me to continue walking on the road alone, sure that the carriage would stop for me. Kent and Ivan would come up from both sides and Tristan himself would come up from behind. Leaving the travellers no place to was the first time ever he had asked me to take part in one of their tricks to trap a human.

His plan made me sick, but I was afraid to refuse them and stayed on the road. Walking slowly in the middle of the muddy track. Exactly as Tristan had predicted, the carriage came to a halt when the driver noticed me.

"Look at what we have here, a little missus all on her own. Can we offer you a safe ride to the next town?" The deep thundering voice, came from a heavy man. He was sitting on the box, whip in one hand and the reigns in one hand. Leaning down and letting his eyes roam over my body, he managed to wink at me just before letting his eyes rest on my chest a little bit too long. It made feel a little bit uncomfortable and angry at the same time.

"No I'm fine thank you." Please ignore me and go home Pleading silently, I knew it was to late because already I could hear the three other vampires come closer. Ivan was the first to act, ripping open the door on the side and grabbing the first person he could. The smell of blood filled the air as he started to feed.

Kent had grabbed a younger woman, she was crying for her mother. Perhaps the woman now in Ivan's arms? I had no more time to think about it because with one precise movement Kent silenced her.

Tristan had managed to grab the man on the back of the carriage, leaving the heavy driver to panic at the sudden attack on his passengers. Standing up he turned to look back, squinting his eyes as he tried to see where his co-driver had disappeared to. As he did, the large man lost his balance and stumbled backwards. He fell down, right in front of me. A low soft thud as his massive body hit the mud.

I froze, looking at the man in front of me. He crawled forward and grabbed my dress, pulling himself to his knees by holding on to my legs. "Please... help me escape." He was so close to me, the alcohol on his breath made me wrinkle my nose up with disgust.

Stepping back, I tried to pull free but he held on to my dress. Clutching the fabric so tight it ripped at the bottom.

It was then something else caught my attention. Making my nostrils flare and move closer. Taking a deep breath, I could smell blood. Somewhere the man had a wound on his body, fresh blood was flowing from his body. Looking down at him, I allowed him to see my eyes. Knowing how dark they would be, it had been weeks since I last went hunting.

Leaning down I touched the back of his head. Letting my fingers slide through the wet spot on the back of his head. Bringing my hand back up, I trembling brought my fingers to my face. Smelling the blood, taking another ragged breath. The scent wasn't pure and sweet but tainted. Perhaps by the alcohol he had been drinking while working.

" Isabella, are you having him?" Tristan showed up beside me, standing close to me. Whispering in my ear, he was like my own personal devil. Adding to the temptation I already struggled to resist.

"For the past months, I have watched you. Carry around your pain, restraining yourself.. almost like you are punishing yourself. To embrace your true self will free you... trust me." On his breath I could smell the clean sweet scent of the young man he had taken.

Trembling I took one last look at the mans face. His hands were still clutching my dress, holding on to me with desperation. Reaching down Tristan picked the man up by his neck.

Dragging him to his feet and making him stand in front of me. Tilting the mans head sideways he used his nail to break the skin, making blood drip from his neck.

"You're eyes are black Isabella, don't deny you want this... to feel his warm blood... released in your mouth and flowing down your throat." Pushing the man closer to me, his neck was now only centimeters away.

I could feel Ivan and Kent watching me as I grabbed the scared man by his shoulders and pulled him closer. Placing my lips on his neck over the cut Tristan had made. Somewhere in the back of my head I could hear Esme's word Your hands are free of human blood. It is something I wish for myself, each day.

Using my shield I shut them out, allowing myself to get lost in the addictive taste of human blood. The past 25 years I had tried to do all the right things for my family, never doubting their ways. Now I had found a new family... and as I dropped the dead body to the ground they smiled at me.

Wiping the blood away from the corner of my mouth Tristan placed a small kiss on my cheek. "I'm proud of you Isabella. Welcome to the family"

His words gave me unexpected pleasure. Walking away with the three men, my new coven. My shield locked in place, pushing away the last echo's of my past. Shedding the last human feelings I felt, embracing my true nature.

The vampire.

A/N This is not the end, just the beginning. And it is allowed to let me know what you think after reading a chapter by leaving a review. I don't bite ;-)