Chapter 15

BPOV

"You sail under an English flag, I have family there."

London 1712

After 2 days and another stop at a small harbour the large ship finally was making it's way up the river Thames. As it did, I stood on the deck. Outside enjoying the silence of the cold evening air.

"Is there really family waiting for you there."

The bold man that had agreed to give me passage came to stand next to me. A small distance between us. A very subtle and generous way of letting me know, if I did not feel like having company or talking, I could just ignore him.

For a moment I considered that option but felt it wouldn't be fair to ignore the man. He was only showing concern for me and had been very generous to me. Offering me passage home.

"Yes, there is, somewhere. I'm sure I can find them." As I spoke out loud, my loneliness was evident in the tone of my voice.

"If you need a place to stay for the first night, I'm sure my wife wouldn't mind giving you a bed for the night. You'd be safe." His words sounded loving as he mentioned his wife. It wasn't enough to touch my heart, instead the last word however made me shiver.

Safe. That is what Tristan had told me he was trying to get us to, a safe place. The truth was, with him alone.. I couldn't have been less safe. Remembering how his teeth had sunk down in my body. I could feel the burn run through my body again.

The captain obviously noticed my response. Stepping a little bit closer and stretching his hand out towards me. "Are you alright?"

Stepping back I hissed in response. Making sure he kept the distance between us. Afraid of how my body would respond as his warm hand touched my cold skin. Knowing that soon, I would need to hunt.

The man stepped back and dropped his arm to the side of his body.

" Thank you for your generous offer." I smiled at him, hoping he wouldn't notice the red in my eyes as I felt my shield slip away. "Really, you don't need to worry about me, I will stay with my family."

We both knew it was a lie. He didn't comment, instead he nodded. "Just keep out of trouble from now on. A young girl like you should not travel without protection."

Muttering something else to himself he turned away and shook his head once more before he started shouting at the rest of the crew. Alerting them to get back to their stations and start preparing to bring the ship into the harbour.

An hour later and for the first time in over 400 years I was back in England again. The last hour had been the most difficult. As the ship had slowly crept into the harbour, I had stood on deck. Staring at the city in front of me, unable to hide my astonishment and battling my own insecurities. The city I had lived in for a short while, had changed so much. It was unrecognisable.

"Are you sure about that bed?"

Placing a hand on my shoulder as we got on shore. The captain asked one last time. I stopped and held my breath, focussing on staying still. He waited for a moment, before letting go and nodding at me. "As you wish."

Walking past me he continued down the harbour. A few men followed him, others went towards the city centre. I watched them leave, clutching my bag to my body.

When the last of the crew had left, I finally relaxed. Looking around I tried to decide what direction was safest and closed my eyes. Listening very carefully. It didn't take long for me to pinpoint the direction where fewest sounds welcomed me.

Hoping it was the right choice I started walking in that direction. Careful to keep a human pace so I wouldn't draw too much attention. After a few hours, I finally reached the edge of the city. By now it was only stars and the moon lighting my path and I felt more confident now. Knowing it was night and not many humans would come out at this time of day.

Pushing myself forward, I went in the direction my instinct told me to go. Using the mixture of wet dirt, green leaves and wood to guide me. Finally the road I was walking on started to lead into a forest. Smiling I started to move faster and faster, until I was running at full speed. A lot had changed but as I glanced up, there was one way to still find my way. Using the stars above me as a map to guide me to a place I hoped was not forgotten.

Just before the sun started to come up. I reached the place I was searching for. Stopping at the edge of the property, I stared at the now crumbled building. The outer walls seemed to have been broken down, the stones perhaps used for new buildings. The main building was still there. It looked sad and damaged, but the shape was still recognisable.

Walking closer I dropped my shield completely. Immediately I was rewarded by the comfortable and familiar sound of the small wildlife in the woods. Stopping I took a deep breath. My nostrils flared as the different scents assaulted my senses.

None of them however were the scent I was looking for.

The scent of another vampire. The building was not only sad and damaged, it had also been empty and unvisited for a very long time.

Entering it, I walked down the large hallway. As I did, memories I had forgotten flooded back into my mind. Remembering how my life had started here and the painful moment Carlisle and I had shared here. Standing still I closed my eyes and held on to the one that hurt the most.

"Without him, how will I pass the time?"

Trying to force unwilling tears from my eyes, I felt the ache in my heart spiral out of control. Carlisle stopped me from falling any deeper by hugging me tight to him, this time his action reminded me of my father. As he did I was thankful for having such sensitive hearing because almost inaudible he answered me.

"By never losing hope."

Realisation hit me as I remembered that conversation. Carlisle had given me the strongest tool of survival. And for the last centuries I had tried so hard to forget, I had forgotten all about that tool. Falling on my knees, I sat in silence wishing my eyes could cry.

Find hope.

Keep hope.

The words repeated in my head until I finally understood what I needed to do. Not only did I need to find Carlisle and Esme. I also needed to retrieve what Tristan had taken from me, he held the only key to my existence. Edwards ring. If the two halves of a soulmate spend eternity finding each other, I still had a chance.

Getting to my feet I walked to the end of the hallway. Opening the door to the little room I had woken up in so long ago. The furniture was gone but I didn't care. Throwing my bag to the ground I sat down and stretched out, lying on my back and staring up at the beams. They had become only slightly more worn down through the years.

Smiling I focused on the grain of the wood and lost myself in tracing the lines. Finding comfort in the simplicity of my task. Each second that passed, I started to feel more and more calm on the inside. Almost as if the silence of this place, the room where it all began, was giving me strength.

Once I was sure the day had passed completely, I got up to my feet and brushed the dust of my clothes. The captain had found some old shirt and pants for me to wear after we had set sail. The shirt was slightly too long, reminding me of the tunic that Carlisle had given me a long time ago in this same room. I didn't mind, it covered me thoroughly.

Emptying my bag on the floor I looked at the few sad belongings I had. Most of them were useless and unwanted reminders of the time spend with Tristan, Kent and Ivan. One item however caught my eye. It was a small piece of wood. Kent had carved it for me, a long time ago.

He had given it to me, proud of creating such a small thing without snapping the fragile wood into small pieces. Little did he know at the time, it reminded me of a similar gift Edward had once given me. That reminder was enough for me to accept his gift and keep it with me all these years. Sliding the whistle in my pocket, I got up and left the rest of my things behind.

When I got outside, I looked back once more at the building. It was just as silent and untouched as it had been when I found it. The atmosphere however seemed to have shifted. From looking sad and damaged in my eyes... it now felt like a tranquil fortress. Old and wise, providing a shelter for me when I had needed it most.

Reminding me of the good and calm companionship Carlisle had offered me in a time where I had been convinced of my own incapability to love... giving me something back I had lost as I tried so hard to prove I was that cold monster. I knew now, my time had been a waste.

I had found hope again. And with that hope came determination. Lifting my chin in the air I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

My nostrils flared as I caught several scents. One however stood out.

Pushing forward I started to chase the scent until I came to a small creek. Standing there with his head down was the cause of the burning ache in my throat. Majestic and tall, Lowering almost to the ground in a crouch, I very lightly pressed my hands down against the soft green grass. Feeling how the sun had warmed it slightly, making it warm to my ice cold touch.

Watching my prey for a moment, knowing it would not satisfy my hunger but would satisfy me in many other ways. I silently jumped forward in his warm muscular back, wrapping my legs around his body and putting my arms around the thick strong neck. I moved so fast, he didn't have time to respond and without a second thought. I tightened my grip. snapping his neck with one single motion.

As we landed on the ground, the soft thud echoes through the forest. I smiled and leaned closer, placing my mouth on the soft spot that would allow me direct access to one of the main arteries. Growling I sank my teeth in his skin, like I expected the blood wasn't as satisfying... but my mind rejoiced at each drop that flowed his body to mine.

When I was done, I got up to my feet. Brushing the few reddish brown hairs that had stuck to my shirt from my clothes. Proud I looked down on the dead deer.

Knowing his death marked my own rebirth.

CPOV

As soon as Mary Alice stopped explaining to us about the house in her vision, I left. Hoping that my faith in the little girl would be rewarded. From the first day Esme had decided to bring her into our life, her gift had intrigued me. At first I had been sceptical, never having been confronted with such a power in a mere human. But she had slowly and without knowing, made me believe she was truly gifted beyond any human or vampire I had ever met . So while Esme lovingly watched over her, I had looked into her background. Finding out that there was a reason why she was alone.

Everyone who had ever been part of her life, had turned their back to her. Afraid by the riddled words she would sometimes speak after seeing things her mind could simply not process. For vampires it was different, the exceptions in this world were our reality. And we had seen enough in our existence to know, this was a gift that should make the girl loved not hated. If she was right, and a big part of me believed she was, her latest vision could lead me to Bella.

As fast as possible I rushed to the place she had described. Forgetting all about pretending to be human. Instead I pushed myself to run so fast, I felt sure they wouldn't even be able to see me. Within a few minutes I had reached the thick forests and was running through them, ignoring everything around me. There was only one thing on my mind at the moment. For the first time in centuries I had a chance to complete my family once more.

When I reached the edge of the orchard I slowed down en stopped under a large tree with low branches. It gave me plenty of coverage and would keep me out of sight. As I stopped, I focused and listened for any sounds. There were many sounds that greeted my ears, hearts beating, children's laughter and a woman calling out to a boy to sit still as she cut his hair. Counting the different heartbeats, I came to the conclusion that a large family currently lived in the Swan House.

Slowly I walked round the house. The moment I did, the overwhelming smell off other vampires made me stop and lower into a crouch. I was prepared to find Bella, vampires do not forget. So I was expecting to come across her scent. However, it was not just her scent. There were several more, the amount of them combined with the fact that inside was a human family, unharmed… it could only mean one thing.

The Volturi had been here.

Rushing forward I caught Bella's scent also, it lead me away in a straight line towards a direction that was familiar to me. A place that had been my sanctuary for many years and I had offered to share with her at the very start. The multiple scents were also leading that way.

Frowning I let the thought run through my mind. Could Bella somehow in the past century been caught by them, joined their side and their way of living. Shaking my head I knew that couldn't be right. At least one of them knew exactly who she was, what she looked like and represented to my family. No she wouldn't be with them. That was impossible. Impossible or the greatest betrayal possible.

I was just about to continue my path, tracking the scent when something else caught my attention. The forest had gone completely silent all at once. It remembered me of the moment in our hunt, when we would without sound stalk and attack our prey. But no matter how silent we were, the forest would grow silent at the moment the snapping of the animals bones… and the almost silent would whimper as the hunted animal last breath would echo through the forest. It was almost like every little being sensed how the delicate balance of nature was disturbed.

Slowing down I glanced at the direction where all sound seemed to have disappeared. Only Esme, myself and once upon time Bella had hunted animals in this region. We were unique in our kind.

Hope grew inside of me. Could she possibly….?

I didn't even give myself a chance to finish the sentence as I pushed myself forward, away from the scent I was tracking and towards the silence. I ran as fast as possible without making a sound. Listening closely and trying to find a scent. After a few miles my patience and intuition were rewarded as I crossed a scent. A singular scent… it belonged to Bella.

Following it, I found it lead me towards a small clearing. Slowing down until I was at a human walking pace. When I almost reached the clearing, I heard footsteps approaching me from the other side of the clearing. Hiding in the bushes I waited for the person coming towards me to catch up.

Looking at him, it was easy recognise what he was part of. He had probably been send out to track Bella. A hunter in a previous life and now a very valuable tracker to their guard. His long strides made the cloak rustle around his legs. The hood was up but I remembered his scent and the face of the man.

I was just about ready to jump at him, confront him with the facts… Not sure what they were but knowing he was one of the honest men and trusted by his leaders for his judgment.

Strong hands around my shoulder made me stop. Stunned I froze as I felt how they wrapped around me tight as I inhaled the scent. Closing my eyes and smiling with relieve. There was no scent, and I knew only one vampire that could cloak it's scent. Making herself untrackable.

"Bella".

Whispering her name, I smiled even brighter when she turned in front of me and faced me. The red glow in her eyes that I expected to see was concealed by the known gold hue of animal blood. Her eyes searched mine with a thousand questions as she raised a finger to her lips. Signalling for me to be silent. And I was, immediately. Trusting Bella with my future.