Disclaimer:
Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all it's characters
BPOV
"Mind if I join you? I could use a break myself." Smiling lazily, he points at the spot next to me, currently occupied by my schoolbag. I stare ahead and shrug. "It's a free country."
He stands and waits for me to move my things. I don't. Instead I turn my head and close my eyes. Hoping he will understand, I'd rather sit alone.
For a moment it is silent. Then the silent shuffle of his feet, a few steps sideways and the rustle of his clothes tell me, he doesn't understand. As he sits down, around the corner, I glance sideways to see a pair of long legs stretch out in the hallway.
Leaning back, I prepare to grab my things and leave to find another secluded spot, or perhaps just leave the school all together. Running home won't take me that long, and Alice will see anyway. Most likely stopping me, claiming I can't run away from school on my first day. She's right and so I sit back, my eyes closed... waiting for the interruption, thinking about how I can cut the conversation short. But everything stays quiet, except for the soft murmur in the background of teachers and students. There is no talking. He is not talking.
"Are you ignoring me?" Speaking softly, I lean forward to peek around the corner. Blue eyes does the same, his eyes showing a tiny hint of amusement as our eyes meet. " No."
I lean back again, resting my head against the wall.
"Are you?" His voice is closer, and I can see him leaning forward again. Resting his weight on one hand so he can peek around the corner this time.
"No."
His lips curl in a smile, small and gentle. "Good."
"So." we start at the same time, and that's enough. Somehow it makes me giggle, knowing that this is probably the most awkward yet at the same time, most uncomplicated conversation I have ever had with a human.
"You first." Still leaning on his hand, he nods at me. I nod back. "Thanks."
Grabbing my bag, I point at the spot next to me. "Since we aren't ignoring each other. Let's start over. Would you like to join me?"
He eyes the now empty spot, then he smiles again. Disappearing for a moment around the corner as he gets to his feet. As he does, I think about his smile. It's friendly, like the way Emmet could smile at me.
"Why so sad?" As Blue eyes sits down next to me, he carefully studies my face. Telling me, the memory of Emmet and ache I feel in my heart from missing him, is reflected on my face. "You're first day at school, can't be that bad." Nudging me in the shoulder, he smiles at me.
Stunned by the initiation to touch me and his response, I shake my head and find a smile to share with him. "I was thinking of my brother, he's not living with us right now. I miss him. And believe me, the first day of school could be that bad."
With as little force as possible, I push back. My shoulder meeting his. Biting my lip nervously, hoping I don't hurt him.
"I'm sorry to hear that. Is he away at college?"
The question is a simple yes or no.. .no strings attached type of question.
"No. He got angry at me and left." Aching as I confess to this stranger, I've grown estranged from my own brother.
Blue eyes nods again. "That must be difficult, I gather the two of you were close?"
How much should I tell him? Thinking about it for a moment, I feel the word on the tip of my tongue. For the first time in almost 2 decades being asked this question, it wants to be answered. So I open my mouth and hastily rush out the single syllable word. "Yes."
"In that case, I'm sure he'll find his way back home to his sister. "
The way he emphasizes the way home and sister, make my heart ache again. Wishing that like this stranger sitting next to me, I could have the same fate. For Emmet to show up at our door, scooping me up in his giant arms and roughing up Alice her spiky hair as she joins us in his welcome. Laughing his giants laugh once more.
"You sound sure?" Hopeful, I turn my face to meet his. Staring into his eyes and watching them fall, shadowed by a memory of his own this time.
"Yes, let's just say. I have some experience on the subject."
"And in your experience, it all worked out?"
Blue eyes leans back again. Looking away from me.
"Not yet... but I'm sure it will soon. The first steps have been made."
"Glad to hear that."
Silence stretches out between us again. A calming sadness lingering between us as both of us stare at the clock.
"Classes finish in 5 minutes, you better get going."
Blue eyes, get's up. Picking up my schoolbag for me and reaching out his hand for me. The calm silence still in his eyes as he looks down on me. I hesitate for a moment, knowing that I can stand up by myself easily. Afraid to let him touch me, feeling the need to hide the cold of my skin. My abnormality a secret, I'm not willing to share.
But he waits for me, arm stretched out.. hand open. And without hesitating, I place my hand in his. He closes his fingers around my hand and grips it tight as he pulls me to my feet, not flinching at the cold or showing any discomfort in touching me. When I'm on my feet, I find he is actually not as tall as i'd anticipated.
"Jasper" Shaking my hand, he still holds in his hand. He introduces himself. The name fits him, slightly old fashioned and uncomplicated.
"Bella Swan." My name rolls of my lips with ease. My real name, the one I was born into and given by my parents Not Isabella Swan the name that is part of my current facade, currently printed on my ID in bold letters. No I want to give him my own name.
His eyebrow raises for a moment, then his face relaxes and he releases my hand from his embrace. Handing me my schoolbag back.
"It was nice meeting you Miss Bella Swan." Drawling out the my name, he reminds me of days long gone. "I'm sure, I'll see you around."
Turning around he starts walking down the hallway as the school bell rings. Doors open and the hallway is flooded with students, rushing to their lockers, happy that another school day has finished.
Within seconds I feel her presence next to me. "Did you make a friend?"
Her eyes sparkle as she links her arm through mine. "He looked absolutely gorgeous." Sighing as she leans her head on my shoulder. I giggle again. Wondering what is wrong with me, feeling so happy for the first time in a long time.
"Gorgeous? Alice, you spied on our conversation?" Trying to sound offended, I pull her along with me. "I got some flashes but was distracted by his eyes."
Sighing again, she stops and turns me around.
"Was he really that comfortable around you, he didn't notice that we.. you are different?" Her eyes big and anxious, framed by a tense frown on her forehead as she stands in front of me, waiting for an answer.
"Oh my god, Alice. You like him? You honestly like Jasper." Laughing out loud, I see my sister drop her guard and look away from me. Then she looks back and I'm happy to find a sparkle in her eyes. "Maybe."
"Didn't you see him coming?" Stunned I watch my sister take a step back. Her tiny frame buzzing with excitement as we talk about my new friend, who obviously in no way, is meant to be my friend.
"I have been busy lately, trying to look for E..for Emmet." Her explanation seems thin but we reach the car. Having taken our time, it is now surrounded with a group of hormonal boys, taking turns at taking pictures with it. Posing like they own the car, touching it and leaning against it. Next to me, Alice starts walking faster... and I stop. Already knowing what will happen. No one touches Alice her things, without her permission.
Marching right up to the group, waving at them with one hand and her other placed on her hip. She stops next to the guy who is taking pictures. "Would you mind taking a picture of me with that car also?"
As she bats her eyes and pouts her lips at him, giving him her most adorable look. My sister, looks to him and back to our car.
The guy, a good 2 feet taller than her, blinks. Some of the other guys whistle and try to draw her attention, while another few start to hoot. Cheering on their friend who is still star struck with Alice her radiant smile.
"Ehm.. sure. But it's not really a girls car. A car like this is build for men, not pretty little girls like you." Wiggling his eyebrows at her, he steps closer and lowers his camera. "But I guess since the owner isn't here yet, you can get a picture also."
"Great." Opening her handbag she starts digging round, taking her time.
The guys start to laugh and joke about how girls always reapply their make up when taking pictures. Betting what it is she is looking for.
Alice just smiles, slowly pulling her hand from her bag.
I know what it is, easily seeing with clarity the key chain dangling from her hand. Knowing in her hand, she is hiding the car key.
"Where should I stand?" Standing next to the door, she looks over her shoulder, already posing. "How about I just sit in the car." Unlocking the car with a single press on the button, she opens the door and get's in. Draping her hands on the steering wheel and leaning back in the custom made seat.
The laughter stops and the tall guy with the camera turns pale as he realizes, the tiny girl in front of him, actually owns the car he just told her is a car build for men.
"Next time I get out of class. I don't want to see any of you near my custom made car." Targeting the group, she all but growls at them as her eyes show pure hostility. "Got it."
One by one, the group splits up. Each of them walking to their own cars, rushing to get away. As they do, I can feel a presence coming up from behind me. His scent familiar and the sound of his footsteps not a warning or reason to feel threatened. Stopping next to me Jasper, stares straight ahead at the car.
"Wow." Is all he says. Rolling my eyes, I punch him in the shoulder. "I know the car is great, that is why my sister just scared away half of the male high school population."
"Not the car, the girl in it. Wait is she your sister?" Staring at me with disbelieve, Jaspers eyes widen and his mouth drops open.
A plan forms in my mind. Staring from him, to Alice and back again. Remembering how she had sighed at seeing the images of me talking to him in the hallway.
"Yes, would you like me to introduce you to her?" Knowing Alice would hear and without a doubt want to meet him. I grab his hand. Starting to lead him to our car. Several things happen at the same time.
Jasper follows me, dazed as he continues to stare at Alice sitting in the car. Alice looks up and instead of seeing the excited sparkle in her eyes that had been there earlier today when we talked about Jasper. Fear, hurt, apology and longing all shine from them at once. The gold shifting from light to dark and back again, in a way I have never seen before. As my feet move, still holding on to Jaspers hand. I hear the car start, reverse out of it's spot and watch it disappear.
"Alice."
Shouting after her angrily, I let go of Jasper and jump forward. Ready to rush forward and catch up and stop the car, but I remember just in time that I am surrounded by humans.
"Well..." Jasper paused, shifting his weight and looking round with a sour look on his face. "That was the weirdest, almost introduction I think I ever experienced before. Thanks for trying, perhaps I'll see you both in school sometime this week." The disappointment in his voice is carefully concealed. The silent buzzing in his pocket, makes both of us look down.
"You should probably get that." Suddenly eager to find a way out of this awkward conversation. I take a step back and give him a small wave as I walk away. Hoping that Alice at least has the clarity to send Carlisle to come collect me. Glancing over my shoulder one more time, I can see Jasper walk away. His shoulders are hunched as he digs in his pocket, retrieving the cellphone and flipping it open. "Yes this is him speaking, please put my brother on the phone."
The rest of the conversation is lost as in the far distance I can hear the Audi being revved, Alice. Rushing forward, following the sound. I catch up and find the car in an empty parking lot, in front of a nursery.
My sister is still in the front, her legs pulled up on the seat, arms wrapped securely around her knees. "Alice." Sliding in the front, next to her. I call out her name and see her stare back at me with big sad eyes.
Her breathing hitches as she struggles for words, then her arms lock around my neck and she sobs silently. "I was so scared, I didn't know it would be like this. Not so fast, not now, not today. Bella.. I messed up everything, I'm so sorry."
Holding her arms, I carefully untangle her from the firm grip on my neck and hold her at arms length. "You did see Jasper?"
Her eyes move and no sound comes out. "Alice, get a grip. I'm not a psychic like you." Trying the last thing I know, I try and reach out.. feeling how my shield stretches out and wraps around us both.
For a moment Alice blinks, then she relaxes and stares at me with disbelief in her eyes.
"Is it bothering you?" Holding on to the tight grip I have on my shield, I wrap it around both of us even tighter carefully stripping myself and Alice of as much as possible until I can see her the gold in her eyes fade away.
"No, it's kind of nice. Thank you." Sitting still she stares at me, before me I can see the panic flood from her eyes until they are back to the dim gold that they had been before going to school this morning.
"Alice, what happened in the parking lot? I thought you would be excited about meeting Jasper."
"I was. But knowing he would see me, and I would see him.. touch him and fall in love with him. It scared me so much, I could see myself loose control and scaring him.. or worse hurting him. I could never do that." Again the panic is back, this time at least not multiplied by a multitude of visions rushing through her head.
"You're right Alice. You would never do that." Hugging her tight, I place a kiss on her forehead. "If he is the one for you, you can not run away. Allow yourself to love him."
Alice nods, her spiky hair tickling underneath my chin. "You're right."
Relieved I let go of her and lean back in my seat. She smiles back, a sudden mischief in her eyes as her lips curl up in a smile. Reaching out her hand, she offers me her pinky. "I will if you will."
The words stumble through my brain, reminding me of the love I had so long ago. And the never-ending hope my sister has that some day, I will find love again. Reaching out, I link my our littlest fingers together and watch Alice her lips curl up even further until they are a radiant smile.
"Deal."
Letting go, she looks at me one more time before starting the car, finally driving us home. As I lean my head against the headrest, I sigh and close my eyes. I can feel deep down something has shifted today and whatever it is, it makes me feel hope.