Of Epic Proportions

by authorinprogress97

And I thought life was hard enough the first time. OC self-insert (because I'm that shameless)

5. Persevere

And I thought life was hard enough the first time.

OC self-insert (because I'm that shameless)

There is so much I want to cover and I can't seem to. I don't know man. Action scenes are not my forte. I don't do movement well. Or feelings.

People who comment, I'm so grateful. Seriously. I never thought I'd get so many reviews and it's so nice to hear the reader's voices, figuratively. Seriously though, I have such wonderful reviewers and you're all wonderful people for not saying mean things.

This is the longest chapter yet. Dude. DUDE.

Nina – Marco is awesome and cute and I am sad he didn't make it. He would have been an awesome addition to the Military Police (or Recon Corps where he can watch over Dani's reckless ass). FRIEND. HI FRIEND.

-0-

The next day dawned bright and early.

Well, it could have been earlier, but it wasn't and I was thankful. Last night had been heavenly. I'd forgotten how great it was to sleep with a pillow. We didn't have proper beds, but at least we weren't sleeping on the cold, hard ground. At this rate, the wooden bunks we were sleeping on with the cloth over it might as well have been a bed. It was certainly a step up from the stone floor of the food reserves.

I eyed the structures in front of us with slight apprehension. It… didn't look safe, to be honest. Then again, I came from a world where safety scissors were still considered unsafe. I mean, seriously. Safety scissors. I couldn't have cut myself on one of those things even if I wanted to.

They were basically attaching strings to our waists and telling us not to flip over and possibly give ourselves brain damage. I wanted to panic – I can barely walk a straight line without tripping most days – but panicking wouldn't help me. I had made a promise, goddammit and I was also a Vale. Vales didn't back down and I wouldn't back down.

But god, did that thing still look scary.

"First off," Shadis announced, "the aptitude test. You worms aren't even good for bait if you fail this! Fail and I'll throw you back into the landfills."

I… didn't doubt that. Like Shadis said, this tying strings to our waist and keeping our balance is the basic of basics when it came to working the 3D Maneuver Gear. Balance was the most crucial aspect of working it, along with spatial recognition. I was horrible at things like that Back Then, but I didn't know about now. This would be the first time I'd be testing that out. It'd be really embarrassing if I couldn't stay up at all.

I glanced at Mikasa, sighing in slight envy. I didn't know if I could stay up like her. She was barely moving, even when a slight breeze blew. I scanned her posture, trying to see if I could memorise the way she positioned her body. I tugged on my braid nervously. Can I really position my body just like that?

A rap to the back of my head had me turning. Armin smiled at me bemusedly, his smile sliding off his face when he took a look at mine. "Hey, why do you look so worried?"

I bit my lip, making a slight noise of frustration. I gestured to Mikasa, who I didn't doubt was passing the test with flying colours.

"I can't do that," I blurted, flailing slightly. "Armin, I trip over the floor. I think it's safe to say that my balance is pretty horrible." My voice dropped to a whisper. "What if I end up failing this test?"

I hated this, the self-doubt. I know I told myself that I wouldn't doubt myself anymore, but it was just so easy. All I could think about was my horrible coordination on the ground and the many ways it could translate to the air.

Armin's hands landed on my shoulders, shaking me a little so I was looking at him. "Hey," he said firmly and softly. "Dani. You'll be fine. Just – don't panic."

I stared into Armin's calm, blue eyes, forcing myself to relax. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply through my nose. This was just another test. I took a lot of tests Back Then, and this was just another test. If I didn't panic, I'd do fine.

I needed – I needed to be confident. I needed to be confident in myself – in my abilities. I can do this. No, I have to do this. I need to be there for Armin, for Mikasa and for Eren.

I opened my eyes, feeling my head clear and smiled at my best friend. He smiled back.

"Thanks," I said quietly, patting the hand on my shoulder as the instructor called out for the next cadet.

He squeezed my shoulders, turning me around and nudging me forward. "Any time."

Don't panic, don't panic, don't panic, I chanted in my head as the instructor asked for my name and I gave it. I attached the strings to my belt the way I saw the others did and waited for them to lift me up.

I thought back to how Mikasa had posed, hands by her side. But… it wasn't only her pose that had caught my eye; it had been her expression. She had looked so calm, which was the exact opposite of the way I was feeling. I had a feeling that was the key.

I closed my eyes and emptied my mind, trying to calm myself down. I needed to get rid of the tension in my shoulders. I wouldn't be able to balance myself if I couldn't feel the way I was shifting. I tried the typical way of calming down: I tried to picture waves lapping against a shore.

It… wasn't working. I couldn't even picture it. It had been so long since I last saw the ocean… no, that wasn't right. Technically, I had never seen the ocean. Sometimes I forgot how different this life is. It just shows that even if I tell myself that I've moved on from my old life, I still haven't quite let go.

I didn't have time to ponder that now. I could feel the tension in the strings and opened my eyes. Calm. I just needed to calm down.

My feet left the ground and I suddenly remembered.

Sensation of flying coupled with the sting of cold rain against my skin, coupled with the warmth of another body against mine…

I tilted backwards, but instead of flailing the way I normally would, I stuck my leg out a little further in front of me. As I had expected, I tilted forward and with that, I immediately placed my leg right underneath me, where my centre of gravity was.

I was smart, wasn't I? I had been smart Then and I was smart now. This was how I was going to pass this – with a calm, analytical mind. This was all just physics. If I kept my weight in line with my centre of gravity, I wouldn't wobble.

Slowly, I let myself relax into the harness, my weight settling on my hips. Whenever I felt myself start to tilt back, I readjusted my left leg. Not too much – that would throw me off-balance – but just enough so that I would stop tilting. I let myself feel my body for the first time, allowing me to straighten myself before I could visibly tilt. I was aware that I didn't have the natural talent Mikasa seemed to have, but I seemed to be doing well enough.

"What the fuck are you doing, Eren Jaeger?" Shadis roared. I glanced out of the corner of my eye to where I heard the commotion, inwardly sighing when I noticed Eren was hanging upside down. Oh, Eren… "Get yourself upright!"

I felt myself being lowered back to the ground. "Good job, cadet," the instructor said distractedly, no doubt distracted by Eren's epic failure. I unhooked myself from the contraption, bowing at the instructor before heading towards Eren.

I pushed my way to the front of the crowd, not believing the sight in front of me even though I had expected it. I remembered this had happened, but I couldn't remember what the cause was.

I'll have to remember quickly if I didn't want Eren to get left out.

•●•●•●•

I scrutinised Eren's belt before looking upwards to the rest of the test rig, chewing on my bottom lip in thought. I tugged on the end of my braid, standing next to Armin.

He nudged. "What are you thinking?" he asked.

I sighed, shrugging. "Something's not right," I murmured. "I mean, Eren should be able to do it, I think. I did. You did. This should be easy for him."

Armin hummed. He didn't say anything, but I knew he had a feeling there was something off too. "Maybe there's something he's not grasping," Armin suggested. "It's Eren; it could be anything."

"I guess so."

"You should be able to do it if you stick to the basics," Mikasa said. Eren was listening intently, even if it was something Mikasa had been trying to tell him for the past three hours. "You don't need to try anything fancy." Mikasa stopped, looking past Eren to meet my gaze. "Dani, anything else you want to add?"

I blinked, but walked forward so I was facing Eren. I didn't know why she wanted me to continue when she was doing just fine. "Um, just lean forward and back," I said, my voice taking on a slightly lecturing tone that I hadn't noticed I had until now. "and place your weight gently on your waist and hip harnesses. For added balance, I use my leg to counter my body when I start to tilt."

"Just relax," Armin added. "You can do this. Even I managed it."

I nodded. If Armin and I could manage it, this should be easy enough for Eren to accomplish.

"Okay," Eren replied, but I could hear the uncertainty in his voice. "I'm sure I can do it this time. Take me up, Armin."

"Okay."

I kept a careful eye on Eren's body as Armin slowly lifted him up. It didn't make sense. His shoulders were relaxed and as Eren's feet lifted off the ground, I noticed that he was placing his weight on his waist and hip harnesses, just like I had said. He should be able to stay upright.

Eren hovered in the air and I thought he managed it. Then, his weight shifted far too much all of a sudden, sending him reeling forward. I winced as he cracked his head against the ground.

"I'll go notify the nurses," I told Armin and Mikasa as they rushed towards the unconscious Eren.

•●•●•●•

Dinner was a quiet affair. I would be glad about the lack of a crowd, but I couldn't stand Eren's forlorn look. I wanted to tell him it wasn't his fault, but it sure seemed like it was. He was staring at me, but he wasn't seeing me. He hadn't even touched his foot.

"Hey, Daz," I heard someone near us say, just loud enough for me to hear. "Wasn't that guy bragging about killing all the Titans last night?" He snickered. "Looks like he'll be on his way to the landfills tomorrow. We can't afford to feed good-for-nothings around here."

I turned to shoot them a brief glare before turning a concerned gaze towards Eren. He hadn't even reacted at all. Then again, neither had Armin or Mikasa. Maybe I was just being too sensitive to everything.

"Don't let it get you down," Armin said, trying to cheer Eren up. "You can just do it tomorrow."

"Armin's right," I agreed, trying to force some cheer into my voice. "You still have another chance. This isn't the end." We will make it into the Recon Corps, Eren. Trust me – and trust yourself.

"Pathetic," Eren muttered. I wished I knew a way to tell him everything will be fine without it sounding like a lie. I couldn't help but be frustrated with myself; what was the use of my knowledge from Back Then if I forgot important details like this? "I can't hope to exterminate them. Not like this."

"Don't give up," I said harshly, frustration welling in my chest. "If you give up now, that's more pathetic."

"You should just give up on that," Mikasa voiced, completely contradicting me.

I jerked, frowning at her. "Mikasa!"

"What'd you just say?" Eren snarled.

"I'm saying you should give up on being a soldier," she clarified, not looking at any of us. "Throwing your life away is not the only way to fight."

I'll admit it. I was shocked. I knew she wanted to keep Eren safe, but to dissuade him like this… I didn't think it was the best way.

"Oh, come on," Eren protested. "I've seen what they do! You think I'll be content not facing them directly?"

"Your feelings are irrelevant."

"What? Why?"

Mikasa looked at me before glancing at Eren. "Because you're not the one who gets to decide whether you can be a soldier."

I sighed. "She's right," I agreed reluctantly. "Eren, it doesn't matter how much you want to kill the Titans. If you can't even get the basics of the 3D Maneuver Gear, you can't hope to master it. Shadis can't pass you if you can't stay upright for the required amount of time."

Eren glared out the window as the bells tolled, signalling the end of dinner.

"I'm not saying you have to go back to the landfills by yourself," Mikasa told Eren, but he wasn't listening. I opened my mouth to protest, but Eren was dragging me out of my seat before I could even alert Mikasa. I didn't think it was very nice just leaving her there to soliloquy when it was meant for someone's ears.

"That wasn't very nice," I mumbled, readjusting my vest so it wasn't crumpled from where Eren had grabbed it.

Eren waved a hand impatiently. "I didn't need to hear Mikasa telling me I couldn't do it again," he said, kicking a rock. "Ne, Dani. How did you really do it?" he asked – no, he demanded.

"I just… did," I answered, realising that I wasn't quite answering him. He gave me an annoyed look and I sighed. "You shouldn't try to think so much. Just focus on your body and manipulate your weight so that it's focused over your centre of gravity – "

"My what?"

"Centre of gravity," I repeated slowly. "It's, well, it's the key to keeping your balance."

"What the hell is a centre of gravity?" Eren asked Armin, obviously confused.

"It's the point from which a body is considered to act," Armin explained. "Well, to put it simply, it's an imaginary spot where your weight is. It helps with balance."

Eren kept silent, staring at the two of us like we were aliens. Well, I should have guessed physics wouldn't make Eren understand everything better. It was just difficult to explain how it felt, hovering in the air like that.

"Just clear your mind," I suggested gently. "It'll be a lot easier when you're not thinking about where you're supposed to place your arms."

Eren scoffed, picking up a rock and throwing it towards the field. "Even Dani can do it and I can't even stay up for ten seconds."

I folded my arms across my chest, frowning at Eren. That sounded mildly offensive. "What is that supposed to mean?"

He glared at me. I could see the frustration swirling in his eyes, but the tone on his voice hurt. "You know what I mean," he scoffed. "Most days, you trip over nothing. Suddenly, you're some expert at this balancing thing and I can't do shit!"

I didn't answer for moment. I clenched my hands into fists, my lips thinning in displeasure as I reigned in my temper. Eren was frustrated and he was on the verge of being sent to the landfills with no chance of getting into the Recon Corps. If I was him, I'd feel frustrated too. However, I wasn't a saint. I refused to take his sharp words without at least dishing something out.

"Eren," I said through gritted teeth. "I'm trying to help you – "

"No, you're not," he snapped, his voice rising. "You haven't done anything."

"Like hell I haven't done anything," I bit out. "I tried to help you, giving you all that advice – "

"Useless advice," he spat. "I don't need your stupid help."

I stepped forward and shoved him. He obviously didn't expect it as he nearly fell over. Armin grabbed my elbow to stop me from hurting Eren further, but I shrugged him off. I wouldn't hurt Eren, even if he deserved a slap for calling my advice useless when it wasn't even my fault he couldn't get it.

My chest heaved and I wanted to yell at him, but that wouldn't make me feel better. It wouldn't make any of us feel better.

"Fine," I said, my voice dangerously low. "You don't need my help. I won't waste it on an ingrate like you."

I stalked off, ignoring Armin's calls. I paused just out of ear shot. I didn't turn as I said monotonously, "If I were you, I'd ask Reiner and Bertolt for advice, if you aren't keen on mine."

I walked off then, my heart aching slightly at Eren's growled good riddance.

•●•●•●•

I turned again so I was face-down, my face buried in my pillow. I kicked at my thin blanket lightly, hugging my pillow close to my chest.

I hated this; fighting with Eren. I knew we argued a lot, but we had never had a fight. I knew it was just Eren's frustration speaking. I was the mature one. I should have just countered all his insults with a cool head, but Eren just made me so angry sometimes! Couldn't he see that I was trying to help him? I wanted him to be in the Recon Corps just as much as he did.

I sighed, pulling my face away from my pillow and gazing over at Mikasa. She was fast asleep. I should be too, but the residual anger – both at Eren and at myself – coupled with my guilt at blowing up at him was keeping me up.

I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands, sitting up. Everyone else was fast asleep except for me. I slid my legs to the floor, slipping my shoes on and grabbing my vest. Maybe if I sat outside for a while, I'd feel tired. Maybe I'd even be able to think a little clearer in the open air.

I slipped my vest on, slipping out of the building and sitting on the porch steps. I looked up at the full moon, drawing my knees to my chest and clutching the vest.

It was a birthday present from my mom. She had made it for my sixth birthday. I didn't know why she decided to make a vest instead of a scarf, but Mom was weird like that. Weird in a good way, of course. The vest was dark blue with light blue designs along the hem. It didn't close because we couldn't afford buttons, but I didn't mind. It was a lot more comfortable when it was loose around my relatively thin frame.

It was the only thing I had left of my family, aside from my father's ring that hung from my neck. I didn't have time to go back and get my things. It would have been so easy to forget them, but I wasn't that cruel. They took care of me and loved me for eight years. To forget them would be the highest form of ungratefulness.

I looked down at the vest clutched in my hands. This was all I had of my family. It had been big on me when I was six, but now it was fitting me snugly. In a couple years, I wouldn't be able to wear it comfortably anymore. I couldn't just throw this away.

I gazed back up at the moon, my eyesight going a little blurry from tears that I wouldn't let fall. The moon looked a lot like the moon from Back Then.

I felt a pang in my heart as I thought about my old life; the life I thought I had moved on from, but instead had been caught in for the past twelve years.

I… I had to throw my old life away. Not completely throw it away, but most of it. It needed to forget the person I used to be, because I wasn't that girl anymore. Fundamentally, I was still her, but my experiences in this world had undoubtedly changed me. If my friends and family from Back Then met me now, they wouldn't recognise me and not just because I looked completely different.

I had to throw away that person from the modern era. I had to focus on now. Focus was the most important thing I needed now. I knew I wouldn't be able to focus if I was still clinging to a life that wasn't mine anymore.

It was… harder than I thought. I hadn't realised how tight a grip I kept on my old life until tonight. It wasn't much – old habits from Back Then that didn't make sense here, trains of thoughts that were so obviously not of this time – but the fact that they were still there were evidence to how much I had been lying to myself all these years.

Tonight, I finally thought of the person I used to be and let her go.

I wasn't her anymore. I was Danika Vale, daughter of Katarina and Aaron Vale. I was born in Karenese district within Wall Rose on the twenty third of July in the year 835. My best friends were Armin Arlert, Mikasa Ackerman and Eren Jaeger. I was a cadet of the 104th Training Squad.

It felt a lot like grieving, but I also felt lighter somehow. I looked back down at my vest, fingering it gently. This was who I am. The only thing I needed to retain from Back Then was my memories of Shingeki no Kyojin. Anything else was irrelevant.

It felt odd, being so in tune with myself and my surroundings. It was like forgetting who I used to be allowed me to traverse a barrier that would help me survive this harsh world. No, I wouldn't just survive. I would live. I would thrive. I might not have family, but I had friends I could trust.

I noticed a light in the woods in the distance. I could spot the tall figure of Reiner, his blonde hair noticeable to me even from this distance. If I was right, the two smaller figures trailing after him were Eren and Armin.

I contemplated calling out to them, but I could feel the fatigue settling in my bones, as well as the anger – although faint – still swirling in my belly. Talking to Eren and apologising could wait until the morning.

•●•●•●•

Eren didn't talk to me throughout breakfast, but it was more out of nerves rather than anger. I wanted to apologise first, but I could tell that Eren was still deep in his thoughts. Speaking to him now would only be a waste of breath.

I hadn't thought he'd talk to me at all, to be honest. If anything, I figured he'd leave any speaking to after he passed the test. It wouldn't be the last time Eren Jaeger took me by surprise, that's for certain.

He grabbed my elbow, steering me away from the crowd as we headed towards the test rigs. I let out a protest, but he shushed me with a look.

"I'm sorry," he said in a rush before I could demand an explanation. "I was frustrated and I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

I crossed my arms, staring at him with a blank gaze. I waited until he shifted uneasily before speaking. "Eren Jaeger," I started seriously. I almost laughed when Eren visibly swallowed and screwed his eyes shut. "You're lucky we're friends or I'd be more pissed at you." I let my face relax into a smile, kicking his shin lightly to get his attention.

"Huh?" He looked confused, but was Eren really any other emotion around me?

"I get it. I was kind of frustrated too." Suddenly, I punched his shoulder, causing him to let out a surprised yelp. "That doesn't mean I'm allowing you to yell at me every time things don't go your way, got it?"

Eren eyed me for a moment longer before grinning back at me. "Got it," he answered, slinging an arm around my shoulders. "Now, watch me pass this test."

"Someone's confident," I teased.

"Of course. I got some great advice." He grinned at me, telling me wordlessly that it was my advice just as much as it was Reiner's.

"You're welcome," I replied. "And good luck!"

Armin glanced at me when I sidled up next to him, smiling slightly. "I see you guys are good now," he commented, linking my arm with his. "Thanks."

I nudged him lightly. "I figured you were stressed enough without the two of us adding onto it." We fell quiet as the tension rose.

Shadis began to speak. "Eren Jaeger, are you prepared?"

"Hai!" Eren replied, gaze burning with determination. I tightened my grip on Armin's arm. He can do it this time. I know he can.

The trainee began to turn the crank and my breath caught in my throat. There was an irrational fear that Eren wouldn't be able to make it and he'd end up being sent to the landfill anyway. I had promised the four of us would be in this together. If he failed –

No! What was I doing?! I shouldn't doubt Eren. He could do this and he would.

I nearly screamed when Eren remained upright. I actually did scream when Eren toppled over backwards.

"What the hell?" I said loudly, feeling unreasonably outraged. I don't get it. Wasn't his stupid belt the fucking problem?

Oh. His belt. Was I an idiot or what? Of course I only remember now.

"I can – I can still do it," Eren panted, sounding sure of himself with the slightest bit of uncertainty slipping into his voice.

"Let him down," Shadis commanded. No. No, no, nonono. I'm not going to let Eren go away when I know he can do this. I couldn't just keep quiet.

"His belt," I exclaimed, my voice sounding unnaturally loud. Everyone turned to me, even Shadis. Oh, snap. My fingers twitched. I wasn't used to this many eyes on me.

Well, too bad. I'm going to have to deal with it. I stepped forward, continuing, "There's something wrong with his belt. That's why he can't stay upright for extended periods of time."

Shadis's eyes narrowed. I stood at attention as I let him scrutinise me.

He circled me once before standing in front of me again. "Vale, isn't it." It was worded like an inquiry, but I knew it was a statement. "Are you sure about that?"

No, not really. "Yes, sir," I said with as much conviction as I could muster.

He made a little derisive snort. "Fine then. Switch belts with Jaeger."

"Sir?"

"Now, Vale."

"Yes, sir."

"What are you doing?" Eren whispered when I took off my belt and handed it to him.

I gave him a look. "Saving your military career. Belt off."

"You only figured out what was wrong now?" he asked incredulously, his hands still not moving.

"Eren, we'll talk about this later. Now get your belt off or I'll take it off for you."

That finally had him unbuckling his belt. I passed him mine, taking his belt but not putting it on. I stepped back, clutching Eren's faulty belt in my hand. I watched as he put on my belt and hooked himself into the contraption.

"If he still fails, I'm sending both of you to the landfill," Shadis informed me nonchalantly. My grip on the faulty belt turned white-knuckled at the thinly veiled threat.

"He won't."

The trainee – Thomas, I think – turned the crank again, bringing Eren up. I watched him carefully, noticing him hovering steady. I couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief.

Next to me, Shadis smirked. "Vale was right," he announced. "Your equipment was defective." He snatched the belt from my hand, inspecting it briefly. "The fittings on your belt were damaged. I didn't even know that could happen, but I suppose I need to add them to the maintenance list."

"Wait," someone behind me said in poorly disguised wonder, "does that mean he managed to get himself upright with broken equipment?"

"Amazing!"

Okay, they shouldn't keep this up or it'll go to Eren's head.

"Th-then what about my aptitude assessment?" Eren asked, still sounding a little worried.

A pause. Shadis sure knew how to work a crowd. "No problems," he said eventually. "Do your best in training!" Shadis sent me a sidelong glance and I started, immediately saluting him before walking back towards the others with my shoulders slumped in relief.

"Phew, he made through," Reiner whistled. He smacked my back with enough force to rock me forward. Ow. "Good call with his faulty equipment." He gave me a look, waggling his eyebrows.

A blush heated up my neck, thankfully staying away from my cheeks. It's not like I wanted to look at his belt the whole time. Sheesh. "Whatever you're thinking, stop it," I warned. "It's not what you think."

Armin sighed in relief, smiling at me. "I think he's saying, 'see that?'"

"No, he's not," Mikasa refuted, eyes on Eren's still hanging form. "He's thinking now he won't have to be separated from me." She turned to me and even if her lips weren't smiling, there was a happy glint in Mikasa's eyes. "From us. He's feeling relieved."

He wasn't the only one feeling relieved. I was too. It'd still be the four of us together. That's all I could ask for.

I looked towards Eren, meeting his eyes. His turquoise eyes shined in the light as he nodded at me. I nodded back.

•●•●•●•

Two years later…

The rain pelted my skin despite the raincoat covering me, but I couldn't stop now. Even if my lungs burned and my muscles ached, I had to keep going.

"You're slow," Shadis barked. I tried not to glare at him, comfortably seated atop a horse while we had to run through the mud with heavy backpacks slung across our backs. "Run, you shitheads!"

I tightened my grip on my backpack and tilted my head downwards further to keep the rain off my face. I couldn't count how many kilometres we had already run, my tired mind losing track after twelve. Stamina training was important for 3DMG use, but that didn't mean I had to like it.

I inhaled through my nose, trying my best to keep my breathing even despite my lungs consistently screaming for more air. I was going at a steady pace, on par with Armin at least.

"What's wrong, Arlert?" Shadis demanded. "You're falling behind!"

I blinked rainwater out of my eyes, turning my head and realising Armin wasn't next to me anymore. He had fallen behind, somewhere around the vicinity of Reiner instead. I could tell he was struggling to keep up, but he was stubborn and he wouldn't give up easily. I started to slow down, but –

"Vale!" Shadis growled. "Don't you fucking dare slow down!"

I grit my teeth, choosing to push a little more speed to vent my anger instead of snapping at Shadis. That would only get me in trouble for insubordination. It's not like I had the breath for it anyway.

Shadis slowed his horse down to a leisurely trot – that bastard – until he was next to Armin. "Is it too hard for you?" he taunted. My grip tightened, but I kept my silence. "Do you want to be the only one who puts down his equipment? If this was a real mission, you'd be Titan food already!" he shot forward and I hung back when he was far away.

"Come on, Armin," I panted. "You've got to go faster."

"Dammit," Armin breathed, his breathing heavy. I knew Armin was always a little frail, but I couldn't convince him to stop, so I could only cheer him on.

"Don't think about the pain," I urged, gripping the hem of his raincoat and tugging lightly. "Just keep moving. We're almost there!"

"Give that to me," someone rasped behind us. I turned my head, my eyes widening when Reiner easily swung Armin's backpack onto his back, his pace still steady next to us. He pinned us both with a stern look as he muttered, "You'll end up dropping out this way. We're being graded on today's training!" Reiner's gaze lingered on me and I bowed my head. I knew I could go faster without burning myself out, but I was only lagging behind because I didn't want to lose sight of Armin.

"But now, they're gonna punish you too," Armin protested, his words coming out unevenly. He turned to look at me, blue eyes pleading. "Both of you."

"Then do your best so they won't find out! Don't make me change my mind," Reiner countered harshly. "Dani, go!"

"But, Armin – " I glanced at my best friend.

"Go," Armin panted, not looking at me. "I won't pull you down." Oh, he noticed too. Well, that was expected.

I bit my lip before nodding once, picking up speed until I was in the middle of the crowd in front of me. I didn't need to watch Armin so closely, damn it, but I couldn't help it. I had to trust in Armin and trust in Reiner too. Reiner wouldn't do anything to harm Armin, nor sabotage him so he would fail.

Soon enough, I heard Armin's distinct heavy breathing next to me and smiled a little.

Knew he could do it.

•●•●•●•

Wind whooshed in my ears as I flew by, engaging and disengaging the grappling hooks of my 3DMG as my eyes scanned the trees. I gritted my teeth; I had to find the cardboard 'Titans' soon or I wouldn't be able to get a good grade.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a brown different from the one surrounding us. It wasn't the brown of the targets, but the brown of the military jackets. I changed course, choosing to follow whoever that was only to rethink my decision. Connie was already tailing whoever that was. It was tough enough to find an unharmed target without piggybacking someone who already had a leech.

"Dammit," I cursed, zooming just by Connie, who startled briefly before keeping his focus on – oh, Jean. He was tailing Jean.

I was starting to feel a little antsy, but I firmly pushed the panic away. I still had another twenty minutes and there were plenty of 'Titans' to kill. I just had to find them.

Another shade of brown caught my eye and I swore again, swinging around one-eighty and heading towards the target. I noticed Eren and Mikasa heading towards me and grinned a little wildly. My blades flashed in the weak sunlight as I cut a chunk from the back of its neck, winking at my two best friends.

Even as I dashed off in a burst of compressed air, I could hear Eren's muttered, "Show off."

•●•●•●•

Mikasa and I stared each other down. I could feel her analysing gaze on me as I carefully watched her, my body tense enough that I could react when she chose to attack.

So far, we had been on even ground, with the two of us winning two rounds each. This last match would determine the winner and I wouldn't be easily beat, not even by Mikasa.

I knew what they said about her. They called her a prodigy and I couldn't disagree. Her skill was unmatched. The only person I could even compare her to was Levi and even then, I didn't think the comparison was accurate. Tentatively, I would say Mikasa could be better than Levi, but that was without seeing the full extent of Levi's prowess.

The flash in her eyes was the only warning I got. Her leg shot up towards my face and I caught her foot with my hands cupped, pushing it back in a poor attempt to push her off-balance. I countered by attempting to catch her torso with my leg sweep, but she ducked under it. Shit, that put my back to her.

I jumped, just in time to avoid her leg sweep and turned, leading with a right hook. She caught my fist and I noticed the slightest of smirks across her lips as she twisted my arm behind my back. Ow, fuck.

I gritted my teeth against the pain and hooked my leg behind her knee, causing us to both fall backwards when her knee buckled. Mikasa grunted softly as my weight collided with her gut, threatening to squish her. I wasn't by any means heavyset, but I was hardly light. I spun to my side to untwist my arm, the joints protesting from the fall. I backed away; I needed to put some space between us –

Mikasa lunged, catching me off guard. We struggled for a little while, rolling on the ground before Mikasa caught my arm again and got me facedown onto the ground. She twisted my arm behind my back and dug her knee into the base of my spine.

"I give," I wheezed, Mikasa finally releasing me so I could breathe. I panted heavily, catching my breath as I lay on the ground. After a while, a hand entered my vision and I smiled up at Mikasa, letting her haul me up. "Good game."

"You too," she praised.

I brushed the dirt from my clothes, laughing breathlessly. I rolled my right shoulder, wincing slightly. Ah, it was probably going to be sore for the next couple of days.

She caught my action, her lips turning down a fraction. "Are you okay?"

I waved away my discomfort, smiling brightly. "I'll live. Don't worry about it." I sighed, shaking a lock of red hair out of my eyes. "Congrats on the win."

To be honest, I couldn't really find the point of combat training like this. We weren't learning a specific martial art. We were learning what I assume would have been basic self-defence that they would have thought Back Then. I had never attended a self-defence class, but it certainly had intrigued me.

Mikasa picked up the wooden dagger that handed been handed out to the pairs at the beginning of the session. "Now, we should start trying with armed versus unarmed."

I smirked slightly, picking up on Mikasa's unique brand of dry and extremely subtle humour. Playtime's over.

Mikasa flipped the dagger in her hand, the blade pointing towards me as she readied to attack. I got into a stable fighting stance, waiting for Mikasa to attack.

"Wait, Annie!" Eren cried from somewhere behind me and I turned, nearly missing Mikasa running towards me. I jerked back just in time, grabbing her wrist and applying pressure as I gripped her collar and hooked my right leg with her left, effectively tripping her. She released the dagger, panting from the sudden exertion.

"You shouldn't have gotten distracted," she chided as she took my hand. I looked back towards Eren's cry.

"Sorry," I murmured, taking the dagger from Mikasa distractedly as I watched Annie and Eren interact. "Wow," I breathed, watching Annie dispatch the dagger from Eren's hand with minimal effort. It was certainly a lot more efficient than the way the instructors had taught us.

I watched Reiner say a few words. He charged Annie and it seemed like in the blink of an eye, he was down on the ground, his body contorted in a painful manner similar to the way Eren's had been in moments ago.

"Dani," Mikasa said sternly, tearing my attention from where Annie had suddenly pressed in close to Eren.

I couldn't help but feel uneasy. To tell the truth, Annie was the one who made me uneasy. Annie Leonheart, with her quiet menace and cold, pale blue eyes. She looked a little like Armin, which unsettled me just a little.

Female Titan…

I shook away all thoughts of the future, gripping the handle of the makeshift dagger in my hand. no, all I needed to focus on was now. One step at a time…

•●•●•●•

I frowned thoughtfully, biting on the head of my spoon to keep occupied. It was a strange quirk I had picked up over the years. While I thought, I always had to have my mouth occupied, most times it was my bottom lip, but if I was holding anything that could be gnawed on, it would end up in my mouth.

"It's just natural," Armin said, looking a little disappointed. I could understand; we'd all like to think that humanity was worth saving, but sometimes things like this happen and you just wonder. "Before the fall of Wall Maria, only the few soldiers in the Recon Corps actually utilised the 3D Maneuver Gear."

I had half an ear on Armin's brief lecture, my ears picking up an interesting conversation going on behind us.

"You should rev it up hard, but just for a second. Using inertia that way, you can minimise gas consumption," Jean explained in what I thought was a slightly cocky manner.

Still… that was actually really smart. I hadn't thought of using the Maneuver Gear like that. By using inertia, it was a brilliant way to make the limited supply we usually had go further. I shook my head slightly. Jean wasn't top in our class when it came to 3D Maneuver Gear handling for nothing.

"You make it sound so easy," his conversation partner scoffed.

"Sure, it's not something anyone could master," he sniffed. Jean didn't usually talk like that, though, unless…

I turned around, rolling my eyes when I realised Mikasa was sitting next to him. Whenever Mikasa was around, Jean went from slightly annoying to downright intolerable. I wish he didn't try to show off in front of Mikasa so much. It only annoyed me – and her.

"Typical Jean," I snorted, shaking my head. "He's really… desperate, isn't he?"

Armin broke of his train of thought, glancing at Jean. "I suppose so," Armin mused. "I wonder if he knows he's actually being a little intolerable."

"I doubt he does."

"But it's still worth remembering if you're trying to get into the Military Police," Jean finished.

"It'd be great if I could get in…" Marco sighed. "There's no higher honour than working near the King."

"Oi, Marco! Stop being such a goody-goody and tell the truth," Jean said, leaning in towards the freckled teen. "You want to join the Military Police so you can live a simple, comfortable life within the Inner District."

"No," Marco protested. "I actually want to – "

"Not everyone is like you, Jean," I said, allowing my voice to travel. I glanced at the two teens out of the corner of my eye. "Some people choose to go to the Military Police because they want to make a difference."

"Like you?" he scoffed, gaze sharp. "You're obviously trying to get into the Military Police too."

I lifted my chin in defiance. "You're wrong," I replied, my voice low enough that he didn't have to strain to hear my voice. "I'm going to get into the Recon Corps."

Stunned silence followed my announcement. Then, Jean erupted into guffaws. My eyebrow twitched in annoyance. It wasn't that absurd of a notion. "Just admit you want the easy life in the Inner District," Jean chuckled. "You don't have to act tough in front of us."

I sighed, rolling my eyes. Whatever. He'll find out I was serious after we disbanded to choose the branch we were joining.

"So interior life's simple and comfortable?" Eren asked, a tremor of anger rippling through his voice. "Five years ago, this place was also part of the interior."

I nodded. Eren made a good point.

"What's your point, Eren?" Jean demanded.

Eren took a swig from his mug, putting it down with an echoing clank. Only then did I realise how everyone had suddenly gone quiet. "Jean, you're such a simpleton, you'd be comfortable wherever you go."

I coughed to hide my laugh as Jean's eye right eye twitched in annoyance. No, wait. I was the mature one. I'm not supposed to encourage this. Where was this even coming from, anyway? This couldn't stem from his talk with Annie… could it?

"Damn you," Jean growled, taking a step forward.

"Don't you think it's crazy, learning how to kill Titans just to run away from them?" Eren continued, no doubt building up to a speech.

"You're bringing that up now? This farce should be kept going; for my sake if nothing else!"

That statement right there was human nature at its basest. As long as it kept me alive, I'll allow it to happen.

"You damn bastard," Eren snarled, standing up.

"Fuck off and face reality!" Jean yelled back, standing up as well.

"Eren," Armin exclaimed, "stop it!"

"Cut it out, guys," I added, getting out of my seat as well. "You'll get in trouble!"

Mikasa stood up calmly, standing between the two. "Stop this," she commanded quietly, taking Eren's hand and placing it by his side. They two adopted siblings shared a look filled with so many words and I looked away, feeling an odd sense of not belonging.

Not really that odd, Dani.

Shut up, me. I turned my gaze back to the trio in front of me, frowning slightly at my own melancholic thoughts.

"Dammit, you asshole!" Jean roared, a burning fire of jealousy emitting from his eyes. He grabbed the front of Eren's shirt and my protective instincts kicked in.

I scowled, picking up my spoon and launching it at Jean's head. "I said cut it out, dumbass," I yelled. "Stop picking fights needlessly!"

Jean bared his teeth at me in annoyance. "Fuck off," he growled. "I don't care! I'm so jealous!"

"Oh my fucking god, are you actually serious?" I uttered, completely baffled. Sometimes it was easy to forget that these were actually teenagers I was dealing with. No matter how childish I acted, no matter how much they could match me in maturity most of the time, it still boiled down to the fact that they were teenagers and I was going through the torture of puberty a second time.

"What the hell are you even talking about?" Eren shouted. I nearly face palmed. Eren could be so dense. He had reached a density that went beyond the obtuse mind of a fourteen-year-old boy.

My eyes widened as Eren gripped Jean's wrist, his other hand coming up to clutch the taller boy's neck. It seemed to happen in slow motion in my eyes as I recalled a similar grab earlier this afternoon, when I had thought it was too fast for my eyes to catch it. It turned out I had committed it to memory, after all. Eren's leg kicked out and that was the end. Jean went crashing to the ground.

I gaped at Eren, not believing what he had done. It was a near perfect mimic of Annie's move on Reiner from the sparring session. Just… why did he do that?

"That hurt," Jean groaned, sitting up and rubbing the back of his head. "What the hell was that?"

"That was a move I learned while you were slacking off," Eren said, sounding unbelievably stern. My eyes were unwittingly drawn to Annie's half-turned figure. "If you think reality is just living comfortably and following your own whims, can you seriously dare to call yourself a soldier?"

I was… surprised. Eren had learned something that took me years to figure out. I hadn't figured that part out until I was in my late teens.

I was wrong. Perhaps I was the one who needed to match them in maturity. I still had much to learn. A lot more to learn.

The door creaked open and I flinched back when I saw Shadis's form, shrouded in darkness. It clung to him like a cloak and all we could see were his eyes, irises shrunk into tiny pinpricks of darkness. I had to squash down a shriek at his sudden appearance. "I thought I just heard some kind of loud noise. Someone care to enlighten me as to what's going on?" His voice had an ominous ring to it.

The silence within the mess hall was so loud it would only take someone breathing a little too loudly to shatter the fragile silence and earn everyone's attention. We sat down and I was just about to come up with an excuse when –

"Sasha just ripped a giant fart, sir," Mikasa offered, raising her hand. I snorted into my soup. I was just going to say Jean had fallen. Man, did I love Mikasa's humour!

A shadow appeared over Shadis's face as he covered his nose discreetly. "You again?" he muttered with a glower. "Learn some self-control!" The door shut behind him and we waited for his footsteps to fade before breathing a collective sigh of relief.

Wordlessly, I passed my bread to Mikasa. Mikasa looked up at me, the barest twinkle of mirth masked behind her stoicism.

"I was just going to say Jean fell, so you win," I told her just as Sasha bounded up to her and wailed about the injustice. To shut her up, Mikasa shoved the roll I had just passed her into Sasha's mouth.

Eren and Armin just shared an amused look – they were more than used to our silent friendly competitions, even if they didn't understand – while Jean just stared between Mikasa and me in mild disbelief.