Of Epic Proportions

by authorinprogress97

And I thought life was hard enough the first time. OC self-insert (because I'm that shameless)

19. Forest

And I thought life was hard enough the first time.

OC self-insert (because I'm that shameless)

School starts tomorrow. Ugh. This is probably going to be my last regular-ish update in a while as I get used to school again.

I'm just having too much fun with this fic.

-0-

A huge forest loomed ahead and somewhere in my foggy memory, the image clicked.

I jerked, causing my horse to snort in protest. I murmured an apology to it. I was grateful for the extra horse that had been given to me when we had met up with other members on the right flank. Being that close to Armin wasn't uncomfortable, but it lacked the proper mobility and breathing space that was afforded by being the one in front.

"I recognise this place." The words slipped out of my mouth before I realised I said it aloud. I made a face, wondering when the hell I was so caught up in my thoughts that my brain-to-mouth filter went to shit.

On my far right, Jean snorted. "No shit?" he said sarcastically. "There are only about a dozen of them between Wall Rose and Wall Maria."

I spared him an annoyed look. He was snippier than usual, which could be attested to our high-danger environment. I longed to rip him a new one, but I was too busy worrying about more important things than biting Jean's head off (aware that the stress and danger was taking its own toll on my temper).

It clicked in more than my future knowledge. I could remember seeing the same spot painted on a yellowed flyer. Dad had been planning on bringing us here for a holiday one day. See some old friends, he had said. I had wondered why he would want to venture to Wall Maria, but it didn't take a genius to figure that most of his friends lived in Wall Maria.

"Oi, what are we even doing at this tourist spot?" Jean complained. I was beginning to think he was just doing it for the sake of complaining. "We're totally off from both our original destination and our return point."

I sighed, eyes darting to the large trees on our left. He made a good point. Why continue with the mission if the mission objective cannot be fulfilled?

To fulfil the secondary mission objective that we weren't told of, of course.

"I don't know…" Armin murmured. "I don't know, but the order came from Commander Erwin, after all." He glanced towards me and I shrugged. He frowned at my vague reply. "He must have a plan."

"What kind of plan?" he asked irritably. "Are they planning to hold a welcome ceremony for us new recruits at a tourist spot?"

I snorted, my lips curling into a lopsided smirk. The sarcasm in his voice grated against my skin, amusing me at the same time.

"No, I don't think so," Armin said seriously. He was so deep in his thoughts that the sarcasm flew over his head.

Jean sighed. "That was a joke." He glanced behind him. "Anyway, that giant woman's following us. No matter what his plan, we can't stay here. The only thing I can imagine is that we're passing through on our way to somewhere else…"

"Maybe Commander Erwin has some hidden agenda we don't know about," I mused. "He always seems to be four steps ahead of everyone and everything."

Armin made a noise of agreement.

"Besides," I added with a pensive look towards the trees, "the terrain in the forest is perfect for 3D Maneuver Gear usage."

I could feel both of their calculating gazes on me, but there was an order for us to stop (in the middle of nowhere?). It cut our conversation short, so I didn't know what either teen would have said about my sudden observation. Well, I could guess what Armin would have said, but Jean could have either gone with another sarcastic retort (he had sarcasm overload today, apparently) or an intelligent remark.

"Alright, listen up, recruits," the soldier, our senior, announced in a no-nonsense voice. "We will now make preparations to launch a counterattack. Draw your blades and wait above in the trees. If any Titans try to enter this forest, stop them at all costs!"

… Launch a counterattack. Really.

I sincerely hoped my judgemental look wasn't on display right now; it wasn't a good idea to sass superiors. It just didn't seem like a good idea.

"U-um, sir," Jean said, frowning slightly. "What do you – "

"Shut up and follow orders!" the soldier bellowed, leaving no room for arguments as he made his way up a tree using his 3DMG.

"Seriously… what's going on?" Jean muttered. I glanced down, realising his fists were tightening reflexively. Out of fear?

Armin didn't reply. I looked over at him, but he was frowning down at the ground in contemplation.

"Let's just… follow orders," I suggested uneasily. There wasn't anything we could do about it. We were trained to follow orders, not question our superiors. It didn't matter if we didn't agree. Our opinions as lowly recruits didn't matter. I nudged Armin out of his reverie, shooting my hooks into the tree opposite the soldier barking orders and reeling myself up.

We situated ourselves in the branches, high enough off the ground that even Eren in his Titan form would have a little trouble reaching us. I glanced down at the forest floor below, letting out a sigh. I wouldn't want to fall off the tree at this height without my Maneuver Gear. I slid down the trunk until I was sitting on the branch, thumping my head against the trunk lightly a couple times before just staring up at the canopy above.

"This is insane." I looked over to see Jean scowling into the distance. "We've abandoned the original mission to cache supplies and when we abandoned it, we should've turned tail and run. Instead, we're forging ahead to a tourist trap." I tried not to snort at the joke he didn't know he had just made. "And now, we're just standing here to stop any Titans that enter the woods?"

He sent a disdainful look towards our superior officer, gritting his teeth in frustration. "Damn him for giving the crazy order," he spat in his direction.

"He'll hear you," Armin pointed out quietly with a worried look aimed towards Jean. My lips twisted into a worried frown. It didn't do for him to be speaking like this.

"And this no real explanation thing is innovative too," Jean groused. "Of course, I'm sure he has his own concerns."

Armin's face pinched into a worried expression. "What do you mean?" the blonde asked hesitantly.

"A commander deemed worthless by his men in a critical situation quite often succumbs to a mysterious attack from behind." Jean eyed the blade in his left hand contemplatively. "I'm just saying it wouldn't surprise me."

Armin shot me an alarmed look, but I kept my eyes on Jean's back, holding a hand up. I turned so I was sitting on the branch with my legs dangling.

"So what are you going to do?" Armin asked.

Jean let out a sigh, looking up briefly before half-turning to us. "Don't be so serious," he grumbled. "This situation's got me a bit worked up, that's all."

I pursed my lips before blowing out an exasperated breath. "You shouldn't be speaking like that," I said seriously. "A soldier who questions his superior officer is easily disposed of too. Not to mention you wouldn't be able to do your job properly."

"Tch. The two of you have obviously been spending too much time with each other." He huffed. "I won't do anything. I'll obey my orders and keep Titans out of the forest the way that bastard wants me to." He turned enough to meet Armin's eyes. "You also think it's the right move, don't you, Armin?"

Armin startled and took a step back, emitting a surprised noise in the back of his throat. I looked up, some unknown emotion swirling in his cerulean orbs.

Jean's expression was dead serious as he stated, "You look like you know something."

Armin looked down almost guiltily. I stood up, frowning at my best friend. He did know something. The question was, was it something I already knew? "Well…"

"Five-meter class incoming!"

All eyes shot to the running figure in the distance, head lolling and arms cocked out weirdly. It didn't impede the Titan's speed however, the grotesque sight still travelling good distance. However, it was still far enough away that it didn't really register as a huge threat.

"What can you deduce?" I said suddenly, turning away from the sight to study Armin's side profile. The gears were turning and dots were connecting. Armin was the only one out of all of us who could figure it out. I didn't count; I had the advantage of already knowing what was happening.

He didn't turn, his eyes making aborted darting movements from side-to-side as he made connections in his mind at the speed of light. He would get there eventually.

"Armin," Jean said sharply, interrupting Armin's thinking. I sent him an annoyed look that went unnoticed. He looked slightly manic. "Our orders were to keep the Titans out of the forest, right? In other words… there's no longer any reason to fight. Right?"

I tapped my leg with the side of my blade, eyeing the Titans clamouring to get us up in the trees. "There was never any reason to fight," I sighed. "Commander Erwin is considered one of the Recon Corps' most brilliant commanders for a reason." Arguably, he was also considered one of the better military commanders in history. That was up for debate. I had begrudging respect for someone who tried to minimise loss of human life, even if I was sure he was using Eren as bait.

Trying and succeeding were two very different things.

"Armin." His eyes shot to me. "What have you deduced?"

"The Female Titan…" Armin murmured, still connecting the dots. "Commander Erwin is going to deal with it in the forest. Kill it?" He immediately shook his head. "No, not kill it."

"They brought in the carts," I prompted mildly. Jean turned to study us. "Odd carts, too. Covered the whole way. I didn't get a glimpse of them."

"I did," Armin interjected, his eyes widening. "Do you really think…?"

"It's possible."

He frowned. "It's not very practical."

"Isn't it, though? You did say…"

"True," he murmured. "If it was that simple…"

"Not alone, no. There has to be…"

"How the hell are you doing that?" Jean demanded. I turned to him with a confused look.

"Doing what?" Armin and I asked in unison. It was odd, but then again, I had never been so in tune with Armin before.

"That freaky twin thing," he elaborated. "It's creepy as fuck."

"I'm starting to think everything about Armin creeps you out," I snorted, shaking my head.

"I'm not creepy," Armin muttered.

"You're not – shit," he cursed suddenly, gaze fixated on something behind us. We both turned and I almost screamed when I noticed there was a Titan crawling its way up the trees, almost reaching Armin and me. Its eyes stared up at the two of us hungrily, almost grinning. "We're going to shift position, guys."

"Okay," Armin answered. I glanced back at the Titan with a shudder. I followed both of them to a tree further down the line, occasionally glancing back at the Titan that crawling towards people who weren't there anymore.

"They've started to figure it out," Jean noted worriedly. "They seem to keep getting better and better at climbing."

Armin grunted, eyeing the Titan that had been climbing to get to us. "That means, as scary as it sounds, they can learn. Although some are better than others, I'm sure."

"Small comfort," I commented drily. I squashed down the urge to kill it before it could hurt anyone. There was no guarantee that I could make it and I didn't want to die from stupidity.

Jean looked into the forest, where the booms had come from. "Sounds like something is going on deeper in the forest. I think I have some idea what." I didn't doubt he had. There was that sharpness in his eyes that I recognised as the puzzle pieces clicking into place. "They lured that Female Titan all the way here in order to capture it. More precisely, to capture whoever is inside of it. That was Commander Erwin's goal."

He shot us a look, continuing in a grim tone, "That's what you guys were talking about, right? It has to be one of us. A spy in the Recon Corps."

I sighed through my nose, an ugly emotion crawling in my throat. It killed Ness and Siss, the Female Titan. Annie had killed them. I wanted to hate her, but I had this feeling that it wasn't really her choice. She was probably brainwashed, in a way – fed opinions and forced to swallow them.

Reiner's grinning face as the Female Titan made its escape flashed in my mind. My heart sank and my stomach churned. It was possible… but why would he? There was just one more vital piece of information that I needed to figure out; something that I refused to acknowledge and therefore locked away deep in my mind.

"That's what we thought," Armin answered. I knew he didn't like to think of one of our own (Annie) as the cause of all this, but it was the only logical explanation. Armin was nothing if not logical and he was no stranger to the cruelty of people.

Jean grimaced, turning to watch the Titan struggle to climb. It almost sounded absurd, having a spy among our ranks – someone who we had trained with. Betrayal hurt more when we thought we knew the traitor.

Reiner and Annie… maybe Bertolt?

I didn't want to think about that. Not here. Maybe it'd revisit those thoughts when we weren't in Titan territory, when I could take every single piece of information I knew about Bertolt and Reiner (more Reiner than Bertolt) and analyse it without fear or any other emotion (sadnessangerpain).

There was an almost inaudible crack and I watched as the Titan fell to the ground in a tangle of limbs with a resounding crash. It looked like it wouldn't move for a while.

"I can't say he was right," Jean said, eyes locked on the fallen Titan as well. "If we'd known there was a Titan informed of our operations, we would've dealt with this in a different way. Our squad leader and the others would've too."

"Would we have?" I demurred, watching the Titan struggle to rearrange its limbs in a way that allowed productive movement. "Would it not have made us distrustful of each other? It would have jeopardised the mission objective."

Spy. Reiner?

No. Not now.

"It would have," Armin agreed ruefully with a grimace. "Commander Erwin wasn't wrong."

"Huh? How can you say that?" Jean asked in disbelief. "How many do you think died for no reason?"

Armin shook his head. "Jean, after the fact, it's easy to say we should've done something else. However," he turned to Jean, "no one knows how things will turn out and even so, you have to make a choice. You must. The lives of a hundred fellow soldiers or the lives of all the humans within the walls… the Commander made his choice. He chose to let those hundred die. I haven't lived that long, but I'm certain of one thing: if there's anyone who can bring change, it will be someone willing to sacrifice what they care for. it will be someone who can throw aside their humanity in order to defeat monsters."

Become a monster in order to defeat them. It sounded so poetic in the grim reality of things.

"Someone who can't sacrifice anything can't ever change anything," he stated.

"Do you think you would be willing to do that if the time came?"

Both boys turned to me as I spoke. I had seated myself on the branch, watching the Titan attempt to right itself with detached interest. I could never do that, so I knew I would never be able to change anything. Jean and Armin though… I could tell they had the potential.

I never wanted that for them.

I never got my answer. At that moment, an unholy screech boomed through the air, the air practically vibrating with the sound.

I shot up quickly – too quickly. My foot slipped and I fell.

Not long, but long enough for my breath to stick in my lungs and for me to feel the weightlessness and fear of falling without 3DMG. I squeezed a trigger and my hooks shot out, embedding themselves into the branch above us and causing the branch I had previously been standing on to drive into my gut.

The screeches died, but my heart pounded in the brief silence as I clambered back onto the branch. It was the silence of waiting for something to happen and I had a feeling that whatever came next was going to be dreadful.

Another sound replace the scream – the sound of hundreds of large feet pounding the ground below. Vibrations chased up the tree as we bore witness to the sight of a horde of Titans ignoring us, running straight into the heart of the forest.

"What's up with them?" Jean shouted. "They're all running into the forest? Why did they suddenly start ignoring us?"

"Maybe they're answering a call," I suggested half-jokingly, despite being dead serious. I leapt off the branch, chasing them as compressed air punctuated the heavy footsteps.

"Begin combat!" the soldier barked. If only it were than easy.

Usually, Titans were relatively slow. The only ones that ever gave us trouble were the Abnormals. Suddenly, it seemed like all of them were Abnormals, at the rate they were going. They had their backs to us, which should have made it easier, but not with the speed they were running. Within seconds, they were out of sight.

"I think it's like Eren," Armin yelled, causing me to look at him sharply and nearly crash into a tree. "When the Titans ate him!"

"But… Eren hadn't made that sound," I pointed out, jolting to a stop when the sound of smoke guns being fired sounded. We stopped, staring above the tree line to see the signal; a dark blue column of smoke.

"What? It's already over?" Jean said, bewildered as he braced himself against the trunk of a tree. I hung in mid-air, my feet brushing the branch Armin was standing on.

I fell silent, a gentle breeze pushing me forward and causing me to swing lightly. This didn't seem right. Maybe they had just gotten Annie out already?

No, they hadn't. They hadn't managed that in canon and I greatly doubted they had managed that now. So… they failed, most likely. They hadn't revealed her. If they had, they would have taken a little more time.

So, where was Annie?

I drummed my fingers against my handgrips, feeling agitated. I should know where she was. I probably did know where she was – or had. I had just… forgotten.

Details… details. Damn all those details.

A hand on my shoulder brought me out of my frustrated thoughts. "We should head back to the horses," Armin said. I stared out into the heart of the forest, where the Titans had run off to.

"Right."

There was an agitated buzzing crawling under my skin, begging me to take action. I had to do something, but what? The call for retreat had already been given and there was nothing I could do about that.

You could always disobey orders again.

Well, that was an idea.

I didn't think I was a particularly disobedient person, nor a soldier who enjoyed questioning and going against orders, but things were different in the battlefield. Orders couldn't be followed when things were going by so fast that most people didn't have the luxury to think. I really didn't want to make it a habit, though.

"Dani, why do you keep looking back?" Armin asked as I landed next to him. I turned back to him, where I had been looking into the forest.

I faltered. "I – I don't really know," I mumbled, heading to my borrowed horse to untie it. It whinnied and I soothed it absentmindedly, feeling sick all of a sudden.

Uh oh, my spidey senses are tingling again…

"Alright, recruits. Move out!"

My body obeyed, but my mind was already in the clouds. There was something I wasn't remembering – something crucial. Whether it was something I could change or not was up to discussion (but according to my horrendous track record, I was managing to change nada).

I was a useless lump.

"If we're withdrawing, does that mean the mission succeeded?" Jean's voice pierced through my restless thoughts. I snapped back to awareness, finally noticing that the forest was passing by us in a blur. I shouldn't have been so out of it, I chided myself.

"Not necessarily," I muttered, shaking my head slightly. Focus.

Armin hummed thoughtfully. "Retreat doesn't always mean success," he agreed reluctantly. "However, if it did succeed, we may already know who was inside the Female Titan."

Restrained anger lined Jean's face. "I'd like to know who it is," he said in a low, dangerous voice. I hid a grimace; he really didn't. "But why was the commander so sure the enemy would come after Eren if he left the walls?"

I knew why Annie wouldn't have tried to get Eren while he was in the walls. He was under heavy surveillance. Eren was bigger than her, so there was no way she could have kidnapped Eren without causing a ruckus. A Titan within the walls coinciding with her absence would raise alarm bells.

More importantly, Mikasa wasn't around to defend Eren out here.

It wasn't that I thought Levi was weaker than Mikasa. Even if I said Mikasa could possibly surpass him, there wasn't any contention that she still wasn't quite up to Levi's level. She had yet to obtain the level of control he did.

No, Mikasa was only a great threat because Eren was involved. If anybody tried to harm a single hair on Eren Jaeger's head, woe unto them in the form of Mikasa. Annie knew that – heck, anybody in the 104th Training Squad knew that.

How Commander Erwin knew, I didn't know.

"I think," Armin said slowly, assembling his thoughts, "it's because they suddenly stopped their advance in the midst of the last assault, for some reason."

"Huh?"

I exhaled sharply in surprise. That was right. The Colossal Titan had broken Trost's gate, but the Armoured Titan hadn't appeared to break through Wall Rose the way he had with Wall Maria.

Maybe because the Armoured Titan is one of us.

Shut up. Please… shut up.

"Even though they managed to break through Trost's gate, they didn't even try for the inner gate and when Eren sealed the gate, they let him," Armin explained. "It would mean that they have bigger concerns."

They let him. Just like that. They hadn't tried to stop him. They just… let him pick up the boulder and seal the hole. However, it was a lot more complicated than that, at least to me. All I could see in my mind's eye was Mitabi's broken body, kilometres away from the boulder where he had been.

"Bigger concerns?"

"Something more important to them than breaching the walls. Something unexpected that happened."

I heard Jean's sharp intake of air as his eyes flared wide in surprise. "Eren's transformation into a Titan."

Armin nodded. "I think that's the only answer."

I glanced at Jean, his forehead creased as he struggled to reach the conclusion Armin was striving for. "Then… that means…" Come on, Jean. "Wait, so…"

"Someone who was there," Armin interjected impatiently, "who saw Eren transform, is the Titan."

Annie is the Female Titan.

That was a fact. That was something I knew… so why did I feel so unsettled? I pulled back gently on the reins, causing my horse to slow and draw back.

The Female Titan killed dozens of Scouts.

Yet another undisputed fact. A horrible fact – Annie Leonheart, fifteen-year-old Titan shifter had been the cause of death for god knows how many people, had human blood on her hands… but that wasn't all. What was so important that it rang such loud alarm bells in my mind?

Come on, Dani. Think.

The horse slowed to a stop. I watched Jean's and Armin's retreating backs. They hadn't noticed I had lagged behind – had stopped – yet, but it was only a matter of time before they did.

Annie killed Squad Levi… Petra, Gunther!

"Shit," I cursed quietly, jerking the reins a little too harshly as I changed course – heading straight for the Forest of Giant Trees. The horse brayed in protest; loud enough to attract attention, I was sure. I was proven correct as I heard my name shouted.

The pounding of hooves doubled, then tripled. I glanced to my sides, where Armin and Jean were drawing up, similar looks of confusion and worry on their faces.

"Guys, turn back," I ordered, eyes snapping forward once more. They couldn't be involved in whatever crazy feeling it was that made me do weird stuff like this.

"What are you doing?" Armin demanded.

I tightened my grip on my reins. "I can't tell you. Just – just go back, Armin, Jean."

"There's nothing back there!"

I just shook my head. This wasn't the time to tell him. I didn't even know how to tell him. I could hardly just say that I was actually older than my fifteen years simply because I remember a previous life where this world was fiction. I had never even breached the thought of telling anyone, even Armin. He was my best friend… but this was a secret I would (had to) keep to the grave.

Jean shot forward, blocking my way. I tugged on my reins, the horse protesting once more as I forced us into a stop before we collided.

"Jean," I snapped, glaring at him. I was almost surprised to see him glare back with just as much anger. "Get out of the way."

"Not until you tell us why you're going against orders to go back into that hellhole," he snarled, gesturing sharply to the mass of green ahead. I stubbornly kept my silence. "Danika!"

"I can't tell you," I hissed, sending a pleading gaze towards Armin so he could understand. I really couldn't. There was no way I could explain there could possibly be a massacre on our hands, that the Recon Corps' strongest squad was going to fall at the hands of one of our comrades. "I have to do this alone."

"No," Jean growled. I gave up on him, knowing he would never understand.

"Armin, please," I pleaded, hoping he could understand. "I have a bad feeling, but I don't want to endanger you guys and we're wasting time."

It was ridiculous, really. Every time I uttered the words 'I have a bad feeling', I was always hoping I was wrong. More than half the time, I was wrong and that was more than a relief, but I knew, deep in my bones, that this wasn't one of those defunct times.

Armin sighed. "Promise you'll stay safe."

My shoulders slumped in relief. "I'll try," I promised. "Jean, move." He didn't. "Jean!"

He dismounted with a sigh, holding out Buchwald's reins. I raised an eyebrow, dismounting as well and grabbing the proffered leather strips; it was pretty obvious what he was trying to say.

"Are you sure?" I asked as he didn't relinquish his hold on the reins.

He sighed. "Buchwald and Freya are the only two horses that are comfortable with you." Under his breath, he muttered, "God knows why you freak out any other horse."

I could have said something about that, but there was that tingle, more of a prickle, in the tips of my fingers that spelled danger, danger!

"I want Buchwald back unharmed," Jean said sternly and I rolled my eyes, but he cut off my retort by continuing, "with you on it, Vale."

A corner of my lips kicked up in a smirk – a nervous gesture meant to calm my nerves. "If you keep saying stuff like that, Kirstein, I might think you actually care." I glanced back at Armin, his worried gaze fixed on me. "I'll see you later," I promised.

A nervous smile touched his lips as I turned away, squeezing my calves against Buchwald's sides to urge him forward faster and faster.

I didn't know the timeline. It would have been for too optimistic for me to think that I would be able to stop the Female Titan from killing Gunther. It might have even been too late for me to stop Annie from transforming. I didn't know why, but I just wanted the chance to do something.

Something told me that I might have already been too late.

I was still too far away when a flash of yellow lightning appeared above the tree tops.