The staff of the Make Mine Marvel hotel, which is where the Warriors Three had decided to stay, were infinitely grateful. It was Thanksgiving, and yet they had almost no other guests. It seemed that everyone in New York City had left to other countries to visit relatives, or attend funerals.
"You three dudes are totally awesome!" The young intern, Viola, was ecstatic – not only would this mean a raise for her, but the three guests were all handsome – some more than others, of course. The one with the yellow hair made her want to float in the air.
"My good lady, when we saw that this fine establishment had a vacancy, we couldn't resist. And seeing such a pretty lady working behind the counter – well, that was just icing on the cake." The dashing man took Viola's hand and kissed it, like an old-fashioned hunk would. Viola squealed.
This made being turned into a frog for a few hours totally worth it!
"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh," Viola repeated, cooling herself off with a pink fan, causing her long blonde-with-purple-highlights-hair to fly in the gale. She knew that she had to stay professional – so she only winked at them once before grabbing the keys to the best suite at the hotel.
"I hope you boys find your stay to be wicked awesome." The large one, who had been sniffing for some odd reason, stepped forward.
"And you say that breakfast is free here?" Viola nodded. The breakfast was complimentary; the majority of the people who stayed did so for the food, which was cooked by a renowned chef who was at the top of his game.
After she tossed the keys to the hunk, he bowed. "Forgive us for our rudeness, but we never gave you our names."
He slapped his two partners on their shoulders. "The round one is Volstagg, and the silent one is Hogun. I go by Fandral, Viola." Viola had never heard of anyone called Fandral, but as far as she was concerned, he could call himself whatever he wanted!
"Give me your phone numbers. Um, in case we need to contact you," Viola encouraged, having no intention of storing the numbers in the hotel's databanks. She twirled her pink necklace between her long-nailed fingers.
Hogun let a snicker slip out. Fandral elbowed his usually quiet companion, before informing the young lady, "We don't use phones."
To Viola, who was phone obsessed, this was the biggest turn-off she could receive. Clutching her palm to her mouth, she ran out of the room. The three heroes shrugged at each other.
Loki hadn't been having the best morning. He woke up cranky because sleeping on a Central Park bench was not comfortable in the slightest. To make matters worse, a squirrel had been trying to hide some kind of nut inside his glorious, but admittedly unkempt hair. When he grabbed at the small rodent, it bit him.
It had taken a few minutes of cursing and pacing before the trickster had remembered to use a healing spell, and a few more minutes to turn the rodent into a frog. That was quickly becoming his favorite spell! Still, Loki vowed to himself that he would never sleep in the park again. Frankly, the sewers would be better; at least they were free of squirrels.
The final straw to break the camel's back was that the Warriors Three were at the hotel that Loki had been planning to sneak into. Loki had literally bumped into them!
"Loki! Defend yourself!" the do-gooder Fandral cried as he unsheathed his fencing sword. Hogun did likewise, while Volstagg struggled to remove his sword. Loki's eye twitched; he had no time for this! Using a quick spell, Loki warped inside one of the rooms, leaving behind an identical clone.
The clone gasped, before shaking his fist in the air and shouting, "Darn you, Loki!" The Warriors Three did not hear him, their ears filled with battle cries. As they tackled the clone, only a bunch of dust could be seen.
Loki heard all of this, and chuckled, his eyes gleaming with mischief. For this affront, he would turn the hotel into a giant shoe. There was apparently an Earth legend about a giant shoe that kids lived in. Humans were truly stupid sometimes.
Turning away from the door, Loki froze like a deer in the path of a Frost Giant. He looked into the angry eyes of Lady Sif, who was covered only in a towel, her hair wet from the cleansing water of a shower.
Loki backed up, until he felt the door behind him. "Sif, I can explain!" Sif grabbed her sword, and lunged at Loki. With a yelp, he ducked, and crawled under her bed. There was a loud cracking sound as Sif's sword stabbed into the wood of the door, right where Loki's head had been.
Under the bed, Loki shivered – until he got a lightbulb effect above his head, remembering that he could summon his horned-helmet! That way, her sword couldn't stab him in the head!
Loki snapped his fingers, warping him behind the angry female Asgardian, and placing his helmet on his head. Loki called it his Kill Two Birds with One Stone spell! Loki raised his staff to stab Sif, but he underestimated her reflexes; as he thrust downwards, she spun around gracefully, the light bouncing off her armor and shield, the latter of which deflected the blow.
"You have no honor, traitor." Sif spat out the last word, and Loki knew right then that he would receive no mercy from her.
"You know, I believe I would rather spend time fighting your friends," Loki stated calmly, before making a mad dash for the doorway. Deciding that running would take too long, and too panicked to remember to teleport, Loki jumped down the entire staircase, falling on top of Volstagg and using the, quite frankly, fat man as a trampoline so that he could kick Fandral in the face. Loki smiled as he felt the dirty heel of his boot connect with Fandral's overrated face.
"There can only be one pretty boy on Asgard, O Flirtatious One," Loki whispered triumphantly as he felt a loose tooth break out of Fandral's mouth, falling through the floorboards. Fandral touched his face, cried out, and ran in circles trying to locate a mirror. Hogun wordlessly pulled one out of some hidden compartment.
Fandral snatched it, and burst into tears upon seeing his slightly bruised face. As he continued to sob, even Loki felt some pity.
"Look here, man! It doesn't look that bad at all!" Fandral, grabbed Loki by the collar, and started to yell inside his personal space.
"Have you seen my mouth? A tooth is missing, you annoying little goblin! The ladies will think me horrendous!" Lady Sif, who had by now descended the stairs, hit Fandral on the back of his head with the broad side of her blade.
"Get a hold of yourself. To think, you deign to call yourself a warrior." Sif didn't seem very impressed with the actions of the Warriors Three.
Before the battle could continue to cause more damage, the manager of the hotel ran in. He wasn't thin, but his girth wasn't nearly as wide as Volstagg's. His mustache looked like the kind a campy, maniacal villain would twirl.
"I'll have to ask that you cease this noise. Don't you know its Thanksgiving?" The five Asgardians all looked at each other in confusion. The manager clapped his hands together in delight.
"Thanksgiving is a holiday, where everyone becomes extremely grateful for the things that they have been given. We also get to eat lots of delicious, home-cooked food." Volstagg's mouth began to water.
"Comrades, surely we can halt our battle so that we may sample some of Midgard's cuisine!" Loki watched as the other two members meekly agreed. Loki was about to scoff at them, but his stomach rumbled, code for, "Idiot! I haven't had nourishment in days! Skip out on this meal, and I will kick your butt all the way to Pizza Hut!" Loki didn't dare go against his own stomach, so he nodded at the manager.
Sif was the last to agree. "I will accompany you all, but only to keep an eye on our resident liar."
The manager led them inside a large ballroom, which contained an extremely long, wooden table. A strip of fancy red cloth, with white sequesters, had been laid on the table. Fancy silver plates, gold goblets, and glistening silverware had been placed in front of every chair. Soft classical music could be heard, being transmitted by various speakers throughout the room. Large, rectangular windows helped bring in some natural light and fresh air. Loki had to wonder why the hotel was almost empty.
His question was answered when the manager sheepishly addressed his guests. "There would be more people here, but an incident involving a frog scared most of our guests away." Loki had to quickly cough to hide a laugh.
The group all sat down in various seats. Lady Sif sat down next to Loki, who made sure to put on a show of placing a large, green napkin over his chest, which was the polite thing to do.
A bunch of maids walked in, holding platters of food. Each time a platter opened, even Loki had to admit that he was growing excited! The first platter contained mountains of white mashed potato, smothered by gravy! The second platter contained a Caesar salad, the dressing having a strong, fruity smell.
This was how it proceeded, until the largest platter of them all arrived. The maid smiled, before lifting the top. The huge golden light filled the room, overwhelming everyone. When the light faded, the group could not believe their eyes. Loki could have sworn that Volstagg had a heart attack!
It was a ginormous turkey, so juicy that it was literally dribbling oil. The aroma promised tender meat, and when the maid cut into the bird with a knife, the meat seemed to part like butter. Loki reached out a hand, but Sif smacked it. Loki cradled his now injured hand, glaring daggers at Thor's sometimes love-interest.
"Before we eat, we have the tradition of saying what we are thankful for. Who wants to start?" Volstagg raised a hand.
"I am thankful for this fine meal." His two teammates clapped politely. Loki and Sif remained silent.
"I will go next, if there are no objections," Loki said, standing up for dramatic effect, and raising his goblet, which was filled with wine.
"I have been, as some humans would say on Christmas, naughty. I have been rather rude to my father, I have been mean to my brother, and I have played the Warrior Three like a fiddle." Loki ignored the cries of "Hey!" from Fandral.
"But…I mean to make amends for that. I really do!" Hogun banged a fist against the mahogany table.
"But we heard that you wanted to murder the good Captain America!" Hogun's scowling face softened a bit when Loki replied, "I was in a foul mood, filled with evil intent."
Loki, to make his speech convincing, forced his voice to crack, and tears began to roll down his cheeks. "I don't know how any of you can ever forgive me for the wrongs I have committed. I am so sorry, brave warriors. I am also sorry for walking in your room without permission, fair Sif."
Loki got on his knees, the light from the windows perfectly causing his shadow to grow large. "Please, forgive a foolish magician." The manager was dabbing at his eyes with a napkin.
The Warriors Three, all of them huge softies, ran to embrace Loki, and even Sif had to admit that Loki came off as sympathetic.
The music playing from the speakers began to feature graphic violin usage, as Loki held the Warriors Three, sobbing out all his inner tears. No one noticed when he stuck his tongue out, and snapped his fingers.
Suddenly, everything changed! The bright, decorative room became as ugly and damp as some remote dungeon, with squirrels replacing rats as the main offenders. The Warriors Three were all tied with chains, and Lady Sif was trapped in a cage with the manager.
Loki, smirking at how easily he had fooled them, did a tap dance of joy before leaving the room. The silence was broken by the manager asking, "Is he coming back?"
The answer was given when Loki pranced back in the cold room. The manager's relieved grin disappeared when Loki grabbed the delicious-looking turkey, and once again exited the room. Loki shared his food with no one.
To Be Continued
Author's Notes:
Well, I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving - or at least a happier one than the Warriors Three and Sif are having. And sorry once again at the lack of Captain America.