"There is never anything good in the news anymore."

Loki was flipping through a copy of the Daily Bugle, more out of boredom than curiosity. On Asgard, Odin hired messengers to spread the news. It seemed that Earth instead had to rely on tedious parcels that left black smudges on the fingers.

So far, he had read about three murders (one involving an umbrella), two muggings, a missing pet crocodile, and the exploits of a new-ish hero called the Falcon, who was working with that twat Captain America.

It vexed the God of Mischief that he now had to see the face of his enemy in the paper as well. Loki was about to crumble up the paper in disgust before a thought struck him.

Wait a moment. This paper seemed to feature an abundance of snapshots of Captain America. Perhaps the photographer knows his whereabouts.

Loki quickly scanned the page, and in very miniscule letters under the image, he found what he was looking for: Peter Parker.

"What an average sounding name. And yet, this…Parker may be able to assist me in finding my prey." Loki began to cackle an evil laugh to himself, before sensing the presence of someone in his room. Turning around lightning quick, Loki pressed his staff against the neck of – The Other?

"I could have killed you, you know," Loki scolded, secretly wishing he hadn't stopped before slicing the neck. The Other stuck his tongue out.

"Trickster, I'm only here to make sure that you aren't wasting my master's precious time." The Other's eyes looked around the small room, and settled on the paper on Loki's uncovered bed.

"Into human reading material, I see." The Other grinned, his fangs making for a grotesque image. Loki scoffed.

"If you had any brain, you would realize that this paper is important for fact gathering and information. Believe it or not, this black-and-white book may be the key to finding my hated adversary." Loki's voice rose and rose until it sounded like he was proclaiming that he had discovered the whereabouts of some divine force.

The Other didn't seem very impressed. "Did you at least steal it?" Loki had actually purchased it fair and square from some street vendor.

"It was only two dollars, for Odin's sake! I may be evil, but I'm not poor. Unlike you, heh heh." Loki smirked as The Other searched for some form of comeback. Unfortunately for the ugly alien, he lacked Loki's silver tongue.

"Whatever," The Other finally spat, conceding the fight. "Just make sure that you don't fail this time!" With those parting words, The Other disappeared as silently as he had arrived.

The Daily Bugle staff were all covering their ears and hiding under their desks. An animalistic roar resounded through the building, causing everyone to shudder. One lady burst into tears, sobbing, "I don't want to die!"

They all pitied the young man who was forced to face the source of the roar: their boss, J. Jonah Jameson. At the moment, Jameson was furiously chomping on a cigar as he sat in his leather chair behind his wooden desk.

The young man in front of him gulped. "Jameson, I can explain…" Jameson banged a fist on his desk.

"I don't care what excuses you have, I can't believe you would take photos of Captain America instead of that Winter Soldier guy! Don't you know that super villains are where the money is really at? People love jerks like him!"

"W-with all due respect sir, I think people need to see heroes in their paper. You know, heroes they can look up to." Jameson stood up, red in the face, and began to yell in the boy's face hard enough that spittle splattered against the boy's nose.

"LISTEN HERE, YOU UNGRATEFUL BRAT! WHO DO YOU THINK HIRED YOU, HUH? WITHOUT ME, YOU'D BE ON THE STREETS, WHERE YOU PROBABLY BELONG!"

Loki, who had been waiting for the conversation to end so that he could ask around for Peter Parker, couldn't stand to wait any longer, and stepped out of the closet that he had teleported inside of.

"WHO IN BLAZES ARE YOU?" Jameson was somehow able to keep chomping on his cigar even when he was shouting. Loki snapped his fingers, and the foul smelling cigar blew up in Jameson's face.

Out of the corner of his eye, Loki saw the young man try to edge out the door. Loki grabbed his arm, and pulled the brown-haired boy back.

"Tell me, human, where I may find Peter Parker." Loki snarled, aiming to frighten the boy, who had a camera hanging from his neck like a necklace.

"Heh heh," the young man laughed nervously. "Er, that would be me." Loki wasted no time in slamming Peter against the wall, holding him up by the front of his blue jacket.

"Well then, Peter," Loki began, spitting the boy's name. "I have a question for you. For your sake, you had better answer honestly and to my satisfaction…or else!"

"Let me guess. You want to know where to find Spider-Man, right?" Parker was shaking, but there was also a determined glint in his eyes.

"What? No, no! I don't care about Spider-Man in the slightest! No one does! I just want to know where to find that accursed Captain America? You always take his photo, so you must have some idea."

For some reason, Peter had deflated when Loki dissed Spider-Man, but Loki didn't care. As long as he killed the American hero, what did he care if some photographer grew sad?

"Look, I don't know. Captain America is just really easy to find because he is always the first hero on the scene when trouble happens. I can practically set my watch to him." Peter struggled, even grabbing Loki's wrist in a surprisingly strong grip. Loki silenced the brat by hitting him with the staff.

"In that case, I'll cause trouble by kidnapping you. That should fish him out." Loki picked up the annoying Daily Bugle photographer, and teleported to the roof of the building. A bunch of pigeons who had been idly resting flew off in a panic.

"Now, scream for help!" Peter rolled his eyes.

"He isn't Superman, he won't hear me." Loki stomped on Peter's leg, causing Peter to yell, "Oh help!"

"I always get my way, Parker. Remember that," Loki whispered viciously. Peter rubbed his sore foot and glared at Loki.

Half an hour later, just as Loki was getting ready to toss Peter off the building, they heard what sounded like a jet zooming towards them. To Loki's disappointment, it turned out to be Iron Man, his armor glinting in the late afternoon sun.

"Awesome, you actually heard me!" Peter looked amazed, until Iron Man raised a hand.

"No, actually. I got a phone call from someone called Robbie." Peter sighed.

"Where is Captain America? I demand to see him!" Loki didn't care if he sounded childish; he had waited all day for this!

"Take a raincheck," Iron Man said unsympathetically, scooping up Peter and flying away. As the sun set, so did Loki's tears.

To Be Continued

Yay for Spider-Man references. You know, in hindsight, it was really disappointing that Jameson didn't appear in any of the Amazing Spider-Man films. Ah well.