Rhys watched from the kitchen as Gwen paced in front of the sofa.

"It's no big deal, Gwen."

"No big deal!" she shouted at him. "Carrie is in hospital with her appendix and our wedding is in three days! I am down one bridesmaid!"

"Trina can do just fine…" Rhys started.

"No, no. It won't work. I planned for two bridesmaids, Rhys, two not one. It's all falling to pieces. The whole thing is going to turn out a catastrophe."

Rhys marched to her and put his hands on her shoulders to stop her pacing. "Hey, look at me. It's not a catastrophe; it's our wedding day. No matter what happens, no matter what problems might come up, it's going to be perfect. You know why? Because I will be marrying the most amazing woman in the entire world."

Gwen's eyes were wet. "I love you, Rhys Williams. I'm the one who's lucky to be marrying someone like you." She took a deep breath. "And you're right. It will all be fine."

"That's the spirit. Now, I don't half fancy some ice cream. What do you say?"

"We don't have any ice cream," Gwen answered.

"Then we'll just have to go get some," he said with a grin.

Laughing, Gwen grabbed her coat and followed Rhys out the door. They walked down the street arguing over which place to try. Rhys wanted to try a new place a few blocks away while Gwen thought they should just stick with the place round the corner. With a pouting lip and puppy eyes, Rhys won the argument.

On the way back to their flat, Gwen stopped suddenly.

"Did you hear that?" she asked and looked down the dark alley they stood next to.

Rhys turned his head a few times. "Hear what?"

"I don't…"

Gwen was interrupted by a roar as a weevil charged out of the alley towards them. Gwen pushed Rhys out of the way and reached for her gun. Unfortunately, she wasn't carrying a gun. Rhys pulled her and they started to run, but the weevil was fast. Gwen tripped and it looked like it was all over for her. Gwen closed her eyes and waited for the weevil's strike, but it never came. She opened her eyes as Rhys was helping her to her feet. A few metres away, Buffy was a blur as she fought with the weevil. It didn't take long until, with a sickening crack, the weevil fell dead to the pavement.

"You guys all right?" Buffy asked as if she had just met them on a leisurely stroll.

"Yeah, yeah, we're fine," Rhys answered. "Thanks for that."

"You saved our lives," Gwen said still shocked by the whole thing.

"Eh, part of my job description," Buffy said with a shrug of her shoulders.

"One in every generation and all that, yeah?" Rhys said with a slight laugh. Buffy rolled her eyes. Rhys paused a moment. "Buffy…" He stopped and looked at Gwen.

"What?" Gwen asked.

"Why not…" He tilted his head towards Buffy.

"Why not what?" Buffy asked.

"If it's okay with you," Rhys said to Gwen. "Might be nice in case anything should happen."

Gwen caught on to his unsaid thought. She shook her head, but Rhys gave her the puppy eyes again. "Yeah, all right." She turned to Buffy. "Buffy, I'm short one bridesmaid and you did just save our lives…"

"And before with the giant space whale," Rhys added.

"Yes, and then," Gwen agreed. "It's short notice, I know, but would you be a bridesmaid?"

Buffy looked taken aback for a moment, but then she smiled. "Fully dreading what hideous gown I'll have to wear, I say yes."

"You are a lifesaver!" Rhys said. "In many more ways than one! See, Gwen, nothing will go wrong now."

"You did not just say that!" said Buffy with alarm.

"Oh Rhys!"

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

Two days later, Buffy pushed her way through a crowded club to join Gwen and her hen party.

"Buffy!" Gwen shouted, obviously already affected by the alcohol. She introduced the other girls, but Buffy didn't expect to remember many of them.

"We were worried you wouldn't show," Trina shouted.

"Sorry, got stuck at work."

"Anything serious?" Gwen asked.

"Nope, over and done with."

"Gwen Cooper," a voice said from behind them and they turned as the man tossed his cap, "you're nicked."

"Oh no!" Gwen said as her eyes widened at the stripper. The girls cheered her on as Gwen's face battled between embarrassment and enjoyment.

The night was wilder than a typical night at the Bronze back in Sunnydale, but Buffy loved the familiar feeling of a night partying. Though they had never gotten close at work, Gwen was good at making Buffy feel like one of the group. After several rounds on the dance floor and even more from the bar, Gwen, Buffy, and Trina were in the bathroom for a break.

"This is such a bad idea," Gwen said with a laugh. "I'm getting married in like… what, what... thirteen hours! Oh, look at me! Hot."

"You're stunning, Gwen," Buffy said. "Rhys is the luckiest guy."

"Oh I know," Trina said with a wicked grin and turned to Buffy. "Have you heard about his cock?"

Buffy held back a giggle while Gwen's eyes widened.

"Hey!" Gwen said to Buffy. "What happened to your arm?"

Buffy looked at the bandage on her arm as if just remembering it was there. "Just a scratch. You should see the other guy."

Trina burst into another fit of wild laughter, and Buffy and Gwen exchanged smiles.

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

The alarm bell buzzed like an angry bee. Buffy swung a hand at it; it fell to the floor in pieces.

"Oops," she mumbled into her pillow. She turned and sat up. With some difficulty she rose to her feet out of the bed. "Way too much to drink, Buffy."

Feeling oddly ill and heavy she looked down.

"What?"

She stared at her stomach. Correction—the watermelon that somehow had developed overnight and replaced her stomach. She rushed to her mobile but lurched due to the unfamiliar weight around her middle. She dialled the number and continued to stare at her stomach in the mirror.

"Buffy, do you have any idea what time it is?" Owen's cranky voice said.

"I need you to get over here now, Owen," she said with no small amount of panic in her voice.

"Is it your arm?" he asked.

"No, nuhuh, not that. Just come now," she replied.

Not ten minutes later Owen rushed into her flat holding a medical bag. "Holy mother of…" he exclaimed when he saw her still standing in her bedroom. Switching into doctor mode, "Why don't we take a look at you on the bed?"

"Now's not the time to try to get me into bed, Owen," Buffy snapped.

"No, but you'll be more comfortable if I examine you sitting down."

She capitulated and sat on her bed while he got out his equipment and started his examination.

"Buffy," he said when finishing, "you're pregnant. Almost full term."

"Pregnant?" Buffy repeated. "No, no way could that be happening. It might look like it, but this is not me pregnant."

Owen was about to argue when the front door opened and slammed shut.

"Buffy!" came Jack's voice. "What's happened?"

He barged into the bedroom and stopped short when he saw Buffy's stomach. "Oh."

"Jack, Owen says I'm pregnant."

"Oh, you think?" he replied.

"What? How? What with?"

"It's an exo-biological insemination," Owen said while looking at one of his tools.

"That alien last night," Jack explained.

"It never!" Buffy protested. "I haven't even had sex in… a really long time." Owen and Jack both stared at her. She frowned and headed out to the kitchen. She didn't see the look Owen gave Jack or how Jack rolled his eyes.

"It passed the eggs on in the bite," Jack explained. "Some species do that. A kind of sneaky way of keeping the bloodline going. Boy, would Darwin have a field day if he'd made it to space."

"Not really in the mood for science lectures, Jack," Buffy said. She opened a drawer to get a spoon and then reached in one of the cupboards for a jar of peanut butter. She silently thanked the Powers That Be that Xander and Anya sent it in a package of other American things as a house warming gift.

"Listen, Buffy," Owen said, "you are going to be fine. I promise, okay? If there was any biological incompatibility you would be dead." She only glared at him with a mouth full of peanut butter. "Well, true, temporarily dead and this wouldn't be happening. Not that it's a viable solution now. According to this scan you're carrying a non-sentient blastopheric mass."

"A what?"

"It's a kind of alien egg. But don't worry—I'm going to look after you, I promise. We've got procedures for this situation."

"I'm not the first? Are you saying this has happened before?"

"You've heard of immaculate conception, haven't you? Well…" Jack let the thought trail off.

"Right," Owen said, "we take you back to the hub. You lie back, I run a bio-xenic microtron, a couple of days off your feet, and you'll be right as rain."

"Days!" Buffy shouted. "Oh no. Not days. Hours. I've got hours until I have to be at Gwen's wedding."

"You're not going," Jack said.

"I'm a bridesmaid! I promised Gwen, and one has already backed out because of a stupid appendix. Are you going to say I suddenly have the same thing?"

"Listen, Buffy, you aren't carrying the Baby Jesus in there. Gwen will understand."

"Then ask her. I promised and until she says otherwise, I'm keeping that promise."

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

Jack and Owen returned to the Hub with frowns on their faces.

"How is she?" Tosh asked.

"Which one?" Owen asked. "Bridezilla or the Virgin Mary? Cause they're both going on with the wedding as planned."

"Which is fine," Jack added, "as long as Buffy doesn't go into labour in the aisle. I don't think the happy couple want her giving birth to a razor-toothed monster that eats half their families."

"Could that happen?" Ianto asked.

"Well, look," Owen said, "the pregnancy's advanced and we're not familiar with the species."

"Which is why you, Owen," said Jack, "need to open up the guy with the teeth and make sure there's no surprises.

"I'm on it."

Jack turned to the other two. "Tosh, I need you to go to the wedding and try to talk some sense into those two. Ianto…"

"Jack?"

"Buffy's going to need a new bridesmaid's dress. Bigger. And Gwen's very particular on it matching the others."

"Buffy and I are about the same size," said Tosh. "Why don't I just fill in as bridesmaid and send Buffy back here?"

"Tosh, that is the best thing I've heard all day! I could kiss you! Ianto, cancel what I just said."

"I could go with her," Ianto said. "Help fit the dress. My father was a master tailor and I picked up on a few things."

Jack raised an eyebrow. "You'll have to tell me more… But some other time. Get going."

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

Buffy walked around the hotel while waiting for Jack's promised solution for her dress. There had been some entertainment when the parents of the bride and groom arrived, the animosity only thinly veiled. Trina was going around with a camera taking pictures of anyone who would stand still long enough. But until the dress arrived there wasn't much to do.

She had made one round and was starting again from the lobby when a sharp pain cut across her abdomen. She had to steady herself at the front desk for a moment while the pain passed.

"Are you all right, luv?" said a male, Welsh voice.

"Peachy and working on a side of keen," she replied. She turned to look at the rather cow-faced blonde that addressed her. He looked dumb-struck for a moment before grinning.

"You with the wedding?"

"Friend of the bride," Buffy answered, hoping that the boy would leave her alone.

"Well, I'm Banana. I suppose you can tell why."

"You go brown and gooey and make great bread?"

"I'm actually the best man," he said proudly.

"Rhys is sooo lucky."

"I get to check everything personally, right. Uh, the disco, cake, flowers, seating. So do you fancy a little drink later?"

A witty retort hanging on her lips, Buffy was interrupted by the entrance of Tosh and Ianto. "Excuse me," she said to Banana.

"So is that a no?" she heard while she asked Tosh and Ianto why they were there without any sign of a dress.

"Did Jack send you to babysit me? Really not necessary."

"No, and yes," said Tosh.

"Care to vague that up?" Buffy asked sarcastically.

"It's simple," Ianto said. "Tosh fills in as bridesmaid, you go back to the Hub and get that alien removed."

"Nuhuh," Buffy protested. "Tosh can take my place, but I'm here, things are fine, and I want to see Rhys and Gwen get married." Ianto opened his mouth, but Buffy cut him off. "See this? This is my Willow resolve face. I'm staying until the end of the wedding."

"We'll argue about it later," Tosh said. "First let's see how I fit in your dress."

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

"Dammit!" Jack said when Owen showed him the proteus gland. "I should have seen this before."

"That's it with shape-shifters, innit?" said Owen. "You never know what you're looking at."

"We have to get to Buffy before the mother does."

"But if we don't…" Owen held up a hand to stop Jack's angry protest. "If we don't, she should be all right, yeah? Like you she'll be out for a few minutes and then back to her normal, living self."

"We can't be sure," Jack admitted. "I've never been dismembered and eaten. And why didn't her slayer powers prevent the egg from taking hold in the first place?"

"They could be the reason she's still alive and carrying it," Owen reasoned.

"Maybe, but we're not taking any risks."

"Right," said Owen as he grabbed some equipment and tossed it into his bag.

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

"You look beautiful, Tosh," Buffy said as she stepped back from pinning Tosh's hair in place.

"You think so?"

"If only Owen were here to see you," Buffy teased.

"Buffy, don't…"

Ianto burst into the room. "Owen just called. They're on their way and we need to get Buffy away from here."

"What is it? What's going on?" Buffy demanded.

"You killed the father, but now the mother is out to collect the baby."

"When you say collect…"

"Rip you apart like a lion with a gazelle."

Buffy gave Tosh a quick and light hug. "Wish Gwen and Rhys luck from me."

"Be safe, you two," Tosh said as they left.

They barely reached the stairs before the pain in Buffy's stomach started again. She cried out and doubled over. She lifted her head slightly and her eyes met the gaze of a woman at the foot of the stairs dressed in black.

"Oh god," Buffy moaned, "she's here."

"Where?" Ianto asked. Buffy pointed and the woman revealed her blackened fangs. "Right, we'll take the back stairs."

Grabbing her arm, Ianto helped Buffy to turn and run. They turned corners down the corridors hoping to lose the Nostrovite, but she always stayed only steps behind. Ianto caught site of a service elevator and pushed Buffy in. He pulled his gun and fired the clip into the snarling thing, but she only slowed for a moment. Getting into the lift, Ianto frantically pushed for the doors to close. Only just in time, the doors closed on the sight of a very angry alien.

Ianto pushed the down button and then the emergency stop after they travelled a few feet down.

Buffy fell to the floor clutching her stomach in agony.

"We have to get you out of here," Ianto insisted.

"And then what? A showdown at the O. K. Corral in the middle of the wedding? No, we keep it away from all that. We owe Rhys that much."

"Ok," Ianto agreed after a moment. "I'll call Jack."

He tapped him comm and waited for the answer.

"Ianto," Jack answered. "Tell us what's going on."

"We've found the Nostrovite, a woman in a black dress, but it's got Buffy and me hiding in a service lift."

"But you're both safe?"

"For now." Ianto looked as Buffy gave another cry of pain. "We need to get the thing out of Buffy now. She's in too much pain to run or fight."

"We're almost there."

"Jack, you should know that I fired all I had at that thing and she barely paused. It's going to take more than guns."

"Take care of Buffy, Ianto; we'll deal with the Nostrovite." The conversation ended.

"Eugh," Buffy moaned and got to her feet.

"You should stay down," said Ianto.

"No, the pain's leaving. Give me a sec and we can start running again—get that thing away from the wedding."

"But…"

"No." She pointed to her face.

"Resolve face?" he asked.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you not to argue with a hormonal slayer?"

"No, I must have missed that bit in primary school." He looked around the small space as he thought. "As soon as we move the lift she'll know."

"Right," Buffy agreed. "So we don't move it, we climb it."

"How?"

"Up there." She pointed to the ceiling. "There's some sort of emergency door we can climb through."

"That's only in the movies," Ianto said. "It won't open from this side; it isn't meant to."

"If I could get up there I could force it open. You don't happen to have a ladder in your jacket, do you?" He frowned at her. "Give me a boost?"

"Buffy, I'm not superman. And even your powers couldn't help you climb out while you're doing your whale impression."

"Then we take our chances and run."

"No, we stay and wait for Jack."

"No!" Facing defeat and hormones, Buffy started to cry. She turned away to hide her tears. "Stupid elevator!" She kicked the wall and screamed. "I just wanted to go to a wedding, and instead I get all Rosemary's-babied—alien, hell spawned hormones included."

"It's not just the hormones," Ianto said softly. "It's being stuck here not able to do anything. Jack will save us. Surely you can trust your own father to…"

"It's not trusting him," she interrupted. "Or not not-trusting him. I'm the one that saves the day. I'm the hero. I don't rely on others because in the end I'm the only one with the power to stop the evil. The Chosen One."

"But you're not the only one anymore."

"But I was. For so long it was just me against all the powers of darkness. In my mind it still is. I'm the only slayer worrying about aliens. It's just me against demons and aliens and rifts and hellmouths in this world. No one knows how I feel! No one can."

"How can you live like that?"

"It's the way it is. My destiny."

They sat in silence.

"The last time I was trapped away from the team, I was in a cannibal's cellar with Tosh," Ianto said quietly. "I asked her if the risk was worth it, was giving our lives to save others really worth it. We may save the world, but who saves us? I never was more scared than I was then. I know it doesn't really compare to you, but…"

"But what?" she encouraged when he stopped.

"Maybe feeling scared and alone pulls us together. Means you're human."

Silence took over again.

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

"Where's the… why isn't it…" Jack ranted the half asked questions as he looked in the back of the SUV. "It's moments like this where I understand how much we need Ianto."

"Yeah, well instead of packing the SUV he's trapped in a lift with your daughter. Looks like we'll have to make do with this."

Jack looked at the large battle axe Owen pulled from the weapons chest Buffy left in the SUV.

"She's never going to let me hear the end of this."

HXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXHXH

Gwen swayed with her father in the traditional father-daughter dance. Rhys was dancing with Brenda. Gwen hoped Brenda wasn't giving Rhys too much grief. That woman and her nagging. She was probably demanding to know when she could expect grandchildren. As Gwen and her father turned another couple dancing caught Gwen's eye. She missed a step and her foot landed on her father's shoe.

"You all right, duckling?"

"Yeah, Dad, just a bit clumsy."

"We'll put it down to the excitement of the day. How does it feel to be married?"

Gwen smiled. "Bloody wonderful, that's how I feel today."

The song ended and Gwen sought out Rhys at the punch bowl.

"Watch out," he said. "Banana's put a bit more alcohol than punch in here. But from what I've heard your Torchwood was up to, it's well deserved. You can tell Jack I'm grateful they kept it clear of us. Though, was Buffy pregnant earlier?"

"Alien egg thing. It happens… apparently. I'm just glad Owen got that awful little machine to work. Did you see her dancing with Jack just now?"

"Well it was the father-daughter dance," Rhys said.

"And that means what?" Gwen was confused by his tone; he seemed to think the whole thing obviously natural.

"He's her father."

"What?"

"You didn't know?"

"No! No I didn't. How do you know?"

"She told me. Nice girl, Buffy. Now come dance with me. And if Jack tries to cut in, I won't let him. I'll punch him in the stomach first. Or kick his shin. You're my woman now, and today he can't have you."

"Don't be such a caveman, Rhys Williams," she said, but she was smiling at his display of testosterone anyways.

As I have no idea what you think about the changes I'm making to plot/characters, I welcome feedback and reviews.