-/-
Osgood wasn't the only person wanting or indeed deserving of an explanation and The Doctor had never been fond of repeating himself ad nauseam so avoiding Missy's death glare and muttered "typical back to playing with earth girls" he programmed familiar coordinates into the Tardis and dematerialised. A few seconds later the groan and rasp of the Tardis finished as they arrived at their destination and The Doctor did his best to try and straighten up his appearance.
Yet one hasty glance in any reflective surface showed just how futile that gesture was. He was bruised, burnt and bleeding. His own blood and that of others stained his hair and face not to mention the invisible blood that was dripping from his hands…thousands of innocents dead at his hand but Gallifrey and its people was safe for another day.
That had to count for something? Didn't it?
He wondered if it would provide much comfort in the middle of the night when he woke up screaming from another nightmare with the memory of haunting blue eyes accusing him of murdering children….their children?
"You really should go to the med bay." Missy's tone was almost concerned and The Doctor didn't need to turn to know her eyes were on him. Yet he couldn't look at her, he couldn't bear to look into those eyes of hers and see reflected back the image of the children he had killed.
Just her gaze alone on him made his skin prickle and The Doctor pushed aside any associated reactions. It was just the stress of the situation that had made him react like that, that and allowing The Master into his head; he didn't really crave her touch or comfort. He didn't want her like that, not really…it was her not him and perhaps if he told himself that enough he might even start to believe it? He didn't deserve to be comforted, or to be happy even fleetingly in the middle of this mess.
He was a murderer, a kinslayer, a child killer…
"I'm fine and I don't need advice from you."
Tugging on his waistcoat The Doctor did his best to cover the bloodstains that marred the white of his shirt front, before settling for buttoning up both waistcoat and then his black coat as well. There that hid the worst of it and if he kept his hands in his pockets…
"You are far from fine but go ahead and be stubborn. At the very least change your shirt Honey." Missy added as she stalked around the console, shaking her head and tutting. "Unless of course you are looking for the sympathy vote?"
"Shut up."
"Oooh did I hit a nerve Thete?" Missy teased, her tongue peeking out between her rosy lips as she probed the split lip he had gifted her earlier. "I didn't realise you were so devious Darling…I'm almost impressed, well I would be if it wasn't all for an earth girl…"
"Jealous?" The Doctor taunted pettily enjoying the tensing of Missy's jaw as she tried to feign nonchalance.
"Of your latest ape hardly." Missy scoffed before her smile turned positively wicked as she twirled a piece of singed hair coquettishly around her blood-stained fingers. "Besides twos company and three…"
"What exactly are you babbling about now?" The Doctor sighed yet it seemed she was in no mood to indulge him with answers merely gesturing towards the doors.
"Well off you go can't go keeping the lovely Clara waiting…"`
"Oh no you are not staying in here!" The Doctor insisted. "Do you think I am foolish enough to leave you alone in my Tardis?"
"Why not? I promise to behave and Skip here can keep me company." Missy added sunnily turning back to her conscripted companion who forced a smile.
"Ms Osgood is coming too!" The Doctor added his eyebrows brooking no argument. "I would very much like to hear her explanation of how she returned from the dead and ended up in my Tardis."
"That's a good point!" Missy suddenly snapped her eyes narrowing as she studied her human like she had once again done something interesting, an interesting bug for dissection under Missy's microscope.
"Just what are you doing here Skip? I thought I left you safe and snug in my Tardis with Seb?"
"Safe and with Seb are mutually exclusive." Osgood muttered bitterly, as even in The Doctor's Tardis she still felt cold deep into her bones and she would never take rich oxygenated air for granted again.
"Did you children have another scrap? Honestly do I have to put you in separate play pens?" Missy tutted rolling her eyes in fond amusement, ignoring Osgood's grimace as she looped her hand around the young human's arm and tugged her along, following The Doctor out of his Tardis.
"oooh you are a chilly one, well if you will go for a stroll without a protective suit…"
"I didn't choose to walk anywhere." Osgood huffed, her nose curling slightly in disgust as Missy's hands tried to rub some warmth back into her frozen limbs. "He pushed me out of the Tardis and then he hijacked it!"
"He…did…what?" Missy's tone dropped below freezing, her blue eyes turning glacial.
"He tried to kill me." Osgood repeated her annoyance growing when Missy merely rolled her eyes at that.
"Well of course he did Seb has never had other children to play with, he is going to be a little possessive and lash out, but taking my Tardis…that young man is going to end up on the naughty step for that." Missy added her eyes gleaming wickedly as she patted Osgood's hand. "I'll make him scream apologies I promise."
Squirming uncomfortably at that thought Osgood almost felt bad for the former A.I. Then she remembered he had tried and almost succeeding in killing her, and if it hadn't been for The Doctor's Tardis being just in reach he would have succeeded. "If you can find him…"
"Please Skip do not confuse me with The Doctor." Missy snorted drawing a glare from the man in question as he lowered himself gingerly down on to Clara's settee to await their absent hostess.
"I have more than one failsafe in my Tardis; I don't swan about the universe under the arrogant assumption that I am the only one in existence capable of piloting a Tardis." Missy added as she poked her way curiously around Clara's tiny living room. How anyone could live in such a confined space escaped her, and what were all these post it notes for?
"Forgive me for not taking into consideration megalomaniac murderers with a penchant for thievery." The Doctor muttered bitterly his blue grey eyes barely hiding his exhaustion, and he had no patience for The Master's teasing.
"Pot Kettle love." Missy sniggered back as she slinked back to lean against the arm of the settee, shaking her finger under his nose not even flinching when The Doctor violently smacked it away. "oooh there is The Oncoming Storm we all love and adore."
"Just shut up!" The Doctor barked his fists shaking with a combination of fury and exhaustion, pain and despair.
Forcing his fists to unclench The Doctor rubbed his hands over his face, his aching fingers pressing into his temples as he tried to push away the growing migraine that threatened to rip him and his control apart, he just wanted to crawl into bed and pretend that today hadn't happened.
Forget that that the last few days hadn't happened. From the moment he had last materialised in Clara's kitchen and had been faced with his Impossible Girl's betrayal everything had fallen apart. He had lost Gallifrey again, had suffered torture at the hand of a timelord he had once respected, he had committed murder…
And you got an old friend back
A soothing voice and cool fingers eased the pressure at his temples yet just her presence…her arrogant assumption provoked a rage The Doctor couldn't contain.
"And that's supposed to make it all better?" The Doctor exploded his hands reaching out and grabbing her roughly by whatever parts he could reach…shoulder…hair…throat…
Shaking Missy like a rag doll all The Doctor could see were those blue eyes boring into him…condemning him as he condemned himself.
They were supposed to have died; it was a coward's way of avoiding the responsibility of his actions. Yet The Doctor hadn't anticipated having to live with the guilt again. Guilt at having killed, guilt at having survived, guilt at being relieved he had…that she had…that they had once again thwarted death together.
Thete stop…Love stop…
Her mental voice was surprisingly weak and The Doctor frowned in confusion even as he clenched his fists tighter and screamed out his anger and guilt.
No…No More…Make it stop…Make it go away…
The Doctor pleaded and then suddenly his wish was granted…There was a sudden burst of pain and then nothing.
By contrast for Missy the situation was far from over, The Doctor's grip on her throat suddenly loosened yet his now comatose body was slumped over her pinning her to the floor as she stared up into the face of her reluctant saviour.
"Prince Charming your timing is once again impeccable."
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