Chapter Twenty-Two

She ran…Rin's feet carried her until she was convinced that there was no opening in the thickness of the forest. But despite this, she kept on. The trees parted to make her journey easier, though nothing came from their efforts. There was no light to ease her fears, but she had no idea why she was afraid, or what she was afraid of. All that was visible in her weary eyes was blackness which clouded her judgments just a little more with each passing mile. Keep going, Rin. Just keep going.

The memories flooded her thoughts like tidal waves over the course of several minutes. She witnessed death at every stage of her passing life, assisted in bringing new life into a world that seemed doomed to fall at the hands of ruthless creatures that longed for power, and died more times herself than was humanly possible. Even now, Rin knew that her path was leading her to ruin. She felt it deep within her bones. The outside world, though she couldn't see it now, could be sensed and it was saturated with a dismal atmosphere. Those surrounding her no doubt understood what was happening and knew without a shadow of a doubt that there was nothing that they could do to heal her broken soul.

Rin suffered in silence. There was no sound to be heard that could free her from its deafening presence. Even her rapid breathing was rendered mute to her senses and it nearly drove her to hysterics. What could she do? Stop moving and succumb to the blackness? Scream until her throat bled and then scream some more? There was no one around to hear it, let alone be willing to help her escape it. Even if she tried, there was no way to access the outside world without help. She was physically overcome by another soul which had managed to take her down. Is there where Miho came to when I was in control? Is this what happens when the soul is too weak to fight back?

The tears were virtually nonexistent, but the thought was there. She wanted to cry, but the purgatory of her mind made any type of human emotion incapable of being displayed except within the privacy of her thoughts. I suppose I deserve this. I kept Miho's soul captive with my own and I had no idea that this was the place that I was keeping it. I was never here before now. I have never seen this place before, and yet everything appears familiar…much like I have always been here, but not. Perhaps this place was my own creation and that is why I recognize it. Rin shook her head while she ran. I deserve this…

Dodging more trees, and ran some more until the weight of her soul turned her legs into lead. Determined, she slowed down, but grabbed onto nearby tree limbs to drag herself father. What am I looking for? Help? Assistance? There is nowhere for me to go. There is no one here who can help me, so why keep going? If I keep going, will I die? If I die, then maybe Miho will be free to live without the weight of my soul pressing down on hers. I could save her if I just allow myself to fade…I could die…

Rin stopped moving and held onto a nearby tree, clinging to it with her fingernails. The burden of her own soul seemed determined to drag her down. I'm so sorry, Lord Sesshomaru…I love you but I can't take a life to save my own. I have to die…

She sealed her eyes to defend them from the dark that seemed to be enveloping the area around her. I have to die…

Meanwhile, in the comfort of reality, Miho blinked rapidly through her own tears to adjust to the harsh light of the day. "How did I get here?"

Sesshomaru, who had already set her down, stepped back and watched her closely. "Yes, how did you get here?"

Miho rubbed her forehead to de-cloud her thoughts, secretly rejoicing that she had the control over herself enough to do that. It had been ages it seemed since she had any sort of control whatsoever, and she planned to use that to her advantage until she would slip into the darkness again. "I don't think you want to know how I managed to get back, Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru's golden gaze flared while he took a predatory step forward. "You will tell me, now!" He extended his claws and harnessed his poison, bringing the bright violet toxin into sight by his fingertips.

Miho's tear stained eyes held no sign of fear. At this point, she didn't care what he was or what he could do. If there was a chance that Rin still remained dormant within her, Sesshomaru wouldn't dare jeopardize her safety just to get information out of her. Whether he liked it or not, Miho held all of the control and she wasn't going to let him intimidate her into submission. She was a trained demon hunter and she knew how to utilize her skills despite not having any of her weapons. "Or what? You'll growl at me?" She sucked in a much welcomed breath of fresh air and drank in the heat of the sun. Miho had never really appreciated the little things in life until recently when she began to realize that at any moment, she could be dead.

"Where is she?" Sesshomaru did indeed growl, which cause Miho to snort in amusement.

"Calm down, will you?" Although that was easier said than done since she was also harboring a little bit a hidden panic. Rin wasn't responding to her questions. It was almost as if she had disappeared completely from Miho's subconscious, but the burden of two souls was still evident. "I don't know how I managed to take back control of my body, but it has something to do with Rin's will." She closed her eyes and concentrated as hard as she could, but there was little sign of Rin. "I can't get a response from her. She won't answer me, but I know she is there."

"How do you know that?" Sesshomaru withdrew the threat of his claws and glared at Miho as if it was all her fault.

"I just know, I don't know why!" Miho shook her head. "I can sense that she is still there…but barely." She looked up at Sesshomaru with glistening dark brown puppy dog eyes. It was clear that she was becoming increasingly upset, but her demon hunter training made it easier to restrain the urge to bust out crying. "You said that Rin's original body had been preserved to take back her soul if the opportunity presented itself within a certain amount of time."

Sesshomaru only stared, but his eyes spoke clearly. Yes.

Miho continued. "Well then…let's go!" Without another word, Miho stalked past him and headed for the trees.

Sesshomaru landed in front of her to block her path.

Miho went around him and kept walking. "Got a problem? I thought you wanted to save her life? Let's get to it, then!" She got as far as a yard when her feet left the ground. "AH! Hey!"

Sesshomaru wrapped her tightly in his arms darted toward the sky. "We'll get there faster if I fly."

Miho didn't struggle but she wasn't thrilled to be so close to him. Yeah, he was attractive, but he was a demon. She was still a little on edge by the fact that this guy could kill her with a look if he wanted, but she also knew that he couldn't hurt her without harming the woman that he loved. This demon is very strange. He acts as though he hates all humans…and yet he cradles my body as if it would break with a single touch. He is determined to preserve Rin's soul and bring her back to life. Such a strange demon…

Miho? Is that you?

A sharp gasp and a sudden onset of pain in her skull forced Miho to clutch at her head to control the ache. This did not escape Sesshomaru's notice. "What's wrong?"

Miho blinked rapidly, hoping that what she heard wasn't just her own mind playing tricks on her. Rin?

Silence. And then…Yes! It's me!

"Tell me what's wrong!" Sesshomaru snarled through the harsh cries of the wind blowing in their faces.

Don't tell him, Miho. I don't want him to know.

Miho's eyes widened. Luckily, Sesshomaru couldn't see her face. You want me to make him suffer?

Rin's voice was defiantly weaker. No…he needs to focus. I can't hold on much longer, but he can still save you!

Miho protested. No! You need to keep fighting to stay with me? You die, I die. Understand?

Rin also protested. If I hold on long enough for Kagome to summon my soul from your body, then you will survive and I will fade. I do not have the strength anymore to come back to the world of the living.

Miho was on the verge of losing her mind. Damn it! "I'm fine, Sesshomaru. I just have a bad headache from the sun exposure. It's been a long time since I've seen the light that I have to be careful. I'll just try and sleep for a while, alright?"

Sesshomaru said nothing, which usually meant 'do as you please' in his own silent language, so Miho took advantage. How dare you? Rin, how could you allow this? Why would you give up so easily? He fought for you! He is torturing himself for you! Your friends are breaking their necks to ensure your survival, and for what? So that you can give up at the last second just to save my life?

Back into Rin's mind, the world was still black as death. How she managed to make her voice heard through the thick blanket of impending doom was lost to her understanding, but she had succeeded. "I want to live! I long for it, but not at the expense of another! Would you not feel the same if you had been in my position?" Rin had to shout until her throat burned, but she did it anyway. Her strength was fading.

Don't be a martyr! You're right, I would feel the same as you. But guess what? I AM in the same position! You're not the only one dying. I can feel it! I can feel death looming within the shadows, waiting until I am weak enough so that it can come and take me away! We are both fighting to live! You can't sacrifice yourself like this. You want to save my life, than you have to live! I want to save your life, so I have to live! Do you see how this works?

Rin released her grip on the tree that she had been holding on to and sank to her knees. Her hands hit the ground beneath her and she dug her nails into the blackened soil, churning the earth within her imagination with frail fingers. "So no matter how much I wish it, I cannot die by my will alone? I have to suffer in this darkness for a while longer and then succumb to the reaper?" Her throat thickened with bitterness and resentment.

You sound as if you welcome death, Rin. Is that it? Do you wish to die despite being so close to gaining your life? That is not fair to the people who love you, you know.

Rin wept dry tears. "You would not understand my reasoning."

Try me.

Rin bowed her head and shuddered. "Fear is mankind's most dangerous but necessary emotion. I am afraid of myself. I am afraid of living again when I have already died. I have been murdered by the hands of my allies, and slain by the arrogance of my adolescence…and sacrificed to prove that demons and humans are not able to coexist together in peace."

What are you talking about, Rin?

Rin released the ground and wrapped herself in her own embrace as a biting wind swept through the forest of her prison. "I was killed by a pack of wolves that were controlled by the allies of my friends, poisoned by the power of the underworld in my stupid childish desire to follow Lord Sesshomaru no matter where he dared venture, and murdered by a demon who was determined to prove that my newly conceived child was an abomination to the full blooded demon population. I am an enemy to myself just for being in love with a full blooded demon!"

You resent your love for Sesshomaru?

Rin jerked her head from side to side. "No! Living only hurts the people that I love. I am too weak to live by Lord Sesshomaru's side, but also too weak to keep myself from doing so! I will only cause him more pain, should I die again. There will no doubt be countless more demons AND humans out there just waiting to take me down. Inuyasha's mother was the same way, only she was saved once. Her destruction was caused by a man whose prejudice over demons masked his devotion and love for her!" Rin dug her claws into her arms to fend off the chill in the air. "She gave birth to a half demon on the same night that Sesshomaru and Inuyasha's father died. I would rather sacrifice my life now than give Sesshomaru the opportunity to die protecting me."

It took some time for Miho to answer back. Coward.

Rin blinked. "What?"

You are a coward! If this is how you truly feel, then you are not deserving of Sesshomaru's love! Which as it is, is very difficult to earn given his dislike of humans. You are making this choice to protect him? How is that love? To love someone is to be honest. To love someone is to want to protect them no matter what! But you also have to LIVE in order for him to realize just how deep your devotion is! It is very possible that you can die again because of someone else who doesn't understand that love, but it is also possible that that will NOT happen! You will never know unless you allow yourself the chance to LIVE! No one else can make that decision for you. But while you wallow in your own self pity, remember this. You are a coward if this is your only reason to give up the fight. If you die…if you sacrifice your life and jeopardize mine just to make sure that Sesshomaru doesn't suffer the same fate as his father, as unlikely as it may seem, then I will tell him right now that we have the ability to communicate. I will tell him right now what exactly it is your planning and then he will know exactly just how selfish you really are.

Rin said nothing.

You promise me right now that you will fight to stay alive! Do that, and I will stand by your side for the rest of my own life and fight to keep you safe. Do that, and I will protect your husband to the best of my abilities if he will let me, and I will endeavor to protect any child that you both bring into this world until my last day on earth. Promise me!

Rin struggled to breathe through her sadness. Without even thinking about what it might mean, she nodded while she struggled to maintain her senses as the darkness surrounding her began to envelop her. "Alright…I promise" She whispered as her mind became shrouded by deadly shadows.

Author's Note: Alright everyone, here it is. Another chapter down, only a few more to go. What do you think is going to happen now? Will Rin survive? Will Miho reveal their conversation to Sesshomaru? Will their friends make it in time? Keep guessing!

Until next time, my friends!

OliviaAR