This story takes place between the episodes 'Haunted' and 'Birthmark'. It mostly focuses on the friendship between Robin and Raven after she entered his mind. There aren't really any pairing in this one; it's mostly friendship, though if you want to imagine it's more that's entirely up to you. So far I think this is just going to be a two-shot.
The first part of this chapter is mostly some info on everyone's backgrounds and a recap of 'Haunted' with some added perspective/ information. I tried to keep it as canon as possible.
Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans, Batman, or anything else in the DC comics universe.
Please R&R and enjoy.
Tact (n): Sensitivity in dealing with others or with difficult issues.
While Raven had many abilities, tact has never been one of them. Yes, she was an empath and yes, she could feel the emotions of others; but Raven has also had to suppress her own emotions for so long that no one had ever had to comfort her; meaning she never learned how to comfort others. Raven also had to learn over the years how to try to block out the emotional vibes others gave out so that they wouldn't affect her own, which wasn't easy in a house full of teenagers who dealt with violence on a daily basis. Not only could feeling intense emotions cause her powers to go haywire, but if she is exposed to intense negative emotions for too long it could potentially cause her to become physically ill. Many times when things got too intense around the tower Raven would have to lock herself in her room for days on end (if there weren't any missions).
However, there were sometimes when the empath would have no choice but to try to confront the person(s) who was giving off intense vibes and attempt to comfort them so that she could find relief from the internal conflicts. Raven had tried to read self-help books, as well as doing online research on how to be direct yet sensitive with others. But many times the feelings of the other person she was trying to help would block her ability to think straight that she would usually wind up saying things that she didn't mean to say.
Raven noticed that around certain times of the year her friends would get into moods. The roommates didn't like talking much about their pasts, but over the years the truth had mostly come out. So far no one really knew much about Raven's past (or her destiny). Her friends just knew that she had magic powers that were bound to her emotions. At this point, her friends assumed she was a witch who left her coven (or possibly a cult), though none of them asked her to confirm it. Starfire only knew that she was from Azarath and that she spent a lot of time with monks learning how to meditate, Raven spared her the darker details.
Starfire's parents were dead, her younger brother's whereabouts are unknown, and her older sister Blackfire has betrayed her on multiple occasions. When she landed on Earth, Starfire was escaping impending slavery, which was one of Blackfire's attempts to ruin her life.
Beast Boy was an only child whose parents were also deceased and he often blamed himself for their deaths, though it was an accident he had nothing to do with. He eventually became a member of the Doom Patrol. But the leader's harsh rules had pushed Beast Boy away from his first crime fighting family before he found another new family with the Teen Titans.
Cyborg was a well-known local high school athlete before the accident that killed his mother and almost killed him. While the operation that turned Cyborg into a cybernetic organism saved his life, it also made it difficult for him to lead a normal life in society; until he became part of the crime fighting team.
And then there was Robin: The Boy Wonder, taught by one of the most famous heroes in the world, who never let his guard down and was pretty much forbidden by his former mentor to tell anyone anything about his past because it would expose his identity as well. Though many times he did want to tell his friends the truth, Robin decided to respect his mentor's wishes; even though they weren't exactly on speaking terms as of lately.
Of course, Robin's former mentor would be displeased to know that Raven had figured it out. Robin never asked her to confirm how much about his past Raven knew, but he assumed that she pretty much knew everything important about his past: from his parents' death to Batman and Robin's true identities. But Robin knew that his secrets were safe with her; after all, everyone knew Raven had some secrets of her own.
When the Titan's thought that Robin was going crazy for claiming to see Slade, who was supposedly dead, Raven had no choice but to enter the Boy Wonder's mind. Since the mind link, the two friends had an unspoken bond that would make them lifelong friends. However, mind linking was not a power Raven took lightly. She was always taught to avoid using this power unless it was absolutely necessary because of all the potential risks involved:
*Since Raven was part Demon, there was always the potential for her demon side to take over. Mind linking could easily be used for manipulation and any use of her powers with malicious intent could send the hybrid demon over the edge.
*Another risk was that any powerful memories she uncovered in a person's mind could potentially make her react to it with the same emotional intensity as that person, causing her to lose control of her powers. Being an empath, Raven already had a difficult time trying not to absorb the feelings of others around her.
*During the mental linking process, Raven would be opening a portal between three realms of existence: the physical, the mental, and the spiritual. If she lost control of her powers while establishing a connection, it could cause her to hurt herself or that person (and possibly others) in one or more of those realms.
*The most dangerous risk was that the person whose mind she was entering may cross over into her mind. Being half demon, what was in the depths of Raven's mind could emotionally scar the other person and potentially put them into a state of shock that could lead to coma; potentially causing permanent brain damage or even death in the faint-hearted.
However, even before the mind link, Raven knew that Robin was a strong person: physically, mentally, and spiritually. She didn't need to know all the details about his past to see that. In fact, all the Titans could see that by his leadership skills. That's probably why Raven was surprised to learn about Robin's tragic past of having to witness his parents' death. Under normal circumstances, no one would appear to be so well-rounded after something like that. Yet, somehow Robin was. But even strong, well-rounded people can still feel pain.
It was just past 3 in the morning. Raven was woken up by a nightmare that she knew wasn't hers. When her friends had intense dreams they would penetrate through her state of unconsciousness and cause her to witness the same dream. She knew whose dream it was; she was even expecting it. It always happened around this time of year; but, until recently, she never really knew what it really meant. This nightmare belonged to none other than her leader: Robin.
It was the anniversary of his parents' death and every year he subconsciously relived it. Robin never told anyone about his dream because it could reveal his true identity. Robin's bedroom was soundproof so none of the others heard the screams and the crying when he woke up, though Raven always sensed it. She had asked Robin about it before, but he would just tell her it was nothing.
Raven heard Robin's door open. A few moments later she quietly followed him up to the rooftop, giving some space to avoid getting overpowered by the rush of his emotions.
Robin always loved going up to the rooftop when he needed some alone time. It reminded him of his time in the circus as a child, looking down at the world from high up. It was the closest he had ever come to really flying on his own. Sometimes Robin envied his friends who could fly without help. He will never know what it truly means to feel free from the bounds of gravity and physics, and most of all: the freedom from reality.
Robin could sense that Raven was nearby. Ever since the link they were more in tune with each other. The leader took a moment before he acknowledged the empath; he didn't really feel like talking. Even though his mind was bombarded with the thoughts of his parents, it still didn't feel real. But talking about it would make it feel more real. Robin was standing near the edge of the roof, looking down at the reflection of the moonlight shining in the waves of the bay as they crashed to the island's shore. He avoided looking at Raven so she couldn't see the tears that were forming under his mask.
"It's a beautiful night, huh?" Robin finally stated in the most even voice he could manage.
Robin tried to be nonchalant, but he wasn't fooling Raven. She could sense the intensity he was drowning in: guilt, anger, pain, fear, and despair.
"Very." Raven simply agreed, coming closer to the edge of the roof where he was standing, also not looking at him.
"I never got a view like this in Gotham." Robin said trying to avoid the inevitable, there was a silent pause before he gave up with a sigh. "So I take it you experienced my nightmare again."
Raven nodded. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"Yes and no." He replied. "I know you deserve an explanation and I know talking about it is supposed to make me feel better; but I don't like talking about it because that makes it real. I mean, I know it really happened and I know that nothing will change it, but…" Robin's voice started to break; he stopped to prevent himself from sobbing.
"You don't need to explain anything to me, Robin." The empath assured. "I saw everything: in the dream and in your memories. And I understand."
Robin nodded, still looking down at the shimmering water below. The Boy Wonder took in a deep breath and sighed before he found the strength to speak up again.
"Starfire has told me that she sometimes she finds herself writing letters to her parents about her new life on Earth, only to remember that they aren't alive anymore." Robin explained. "And the other day, Cyborg was telling me that he sometimes wishes they would have just left him alone after the accident instead of trying to save him. He said that before the Titans formed, he was treated like a freak of nature. Just like I was when I went to school for the first time after I was adopted. The kids called me everything from 'circus freak' to 'gypsy boy' and I started to feel ashamed of who I was and ashamed that I felt that way about my heritage... about my family."
"Some people will never understand what you've all been through and some people won't appreciate all that you have accomplished in spite of it." Raven stated. "But at least you have friends that will and do."
Robin nodded in agreement.
"You know how Beast Boy feels, about feeling responsible for his parents' death?" The leader asked his teammate. "That's how I feel sometimes. Like, if I would have done something differently or if I would have gone on the trapeze first that they would still be alive."
"That's survivor's guilt." Raven explained. "And if you did go first then you would be dead and your parents would be miserable because no parent wants to bury their child. Think about it: If none of that had ever happened, then there would have been no Robin to help Batman all those times he needed you, which means he probably would have died in one of those situations where you saved him. And that means more people could have died because there was no Batman or Robin to help them. And if you and everyone else on the team had died instead of their parents, there would be no Teen Titans to protect Jump City and none of us would have ever met and became friends."
Robin took a moment to ponder this thought. Now a part of him was starting to feel guilty for sounding so selfish for pitying himself and another part of him was angry for even thinking it was selfish to wish that his parents were still alive. Most of all, he was confused. Robin didn't know how he should react to that or what he should be feeling anymore. This obviously confused Raven, who was starting to feel self-conscious about her comforting abilities. Any energy she could muster up was spent keeping her powers in check.
"It just feels like everyone we love leaves us." The Boy Wonder finally said with despair radiating off of him.
"I know." Raven said as she took a deep breath. "But if you think about it, none of them actually chose to leave any of you; they died. In some ways, you're all kind of lucky."
The words escaped Raven's mouth before she could process what she was saying.
"I can't believe you just said that." Robin hissed in a low angry tone. "That has got to be the most insensitive thing you have ever said."
Robin turned around and stormed back towards the door to go inside.
"Robin, wait! I didn't …" Raven tried to explain before he slammed the door behind him and walked back down to his room.
Raven was about to chase after him before she heard a light bulb in the stairway break. The sorceress decided she needed to go to her room to meditate, before she could break anything else.
Will Robin forgive Raven? Will this ruin their friendship? What of the other Titans?
Find out next time in Tact: Chapter 2.
Also a review would be nice... *hint hint*