I do not own Star Trek: TNG (at least not on paper or in the eyes of the law, but in my heart...)
Kirkian Legacy
Stardate 43582.4
The three hours from Counselor Troi's communique to the time that he actual met with her in his ready room were anything but peaceful.
Mentally Picard was at odds with himself. If he ended the relationship now, there was still a chance that he could regain a semblance of normalcy. If he just made the decision and broke things off with Lieutenant Kirk, things could return to normal. He would be able to focus on his ship and crew without the constant mental turmoil that the blond brought to him.
'How did I get in this position?' Picard wondered as he gazed out the window. Stars shifted into blurred strings of light that trailed behind them as they moved at warp speed.
He was not relishing the meeting with Troi. It would not do to find that there were some shortcomings in Lieutenant Kirk's performance that his infatuation had blinded him to. Additionally, Picard was concerned that the Betazedian's talent would reveal his secret...in truth he'd wondered several times why she had not already read it in his emotions and thoughts.
When Picard had assumed command of the Enterprise three years ago, he'd had an in depth conversation with the Counselor. He knew Troi was not the type to invade her shipmate's privacy, but certain emotional spikes are impossible for her to ignore – in those cases she practiced a sense of decorum.
It was quite possible that the Counselor had long been aware of his 'relationship'...Is it really a relationship? Picard asked himself.
Picard thought, 'When did I fall so deeply as to allow myself to enter into a relationship...let alone one with an officer under my command?'
In his mind, Picard had long ago come to define himself as Federation officer first and foremost. For him, there were no plans or desire for the mundane things in life so many others sought – he had no need of relationships or family. That's what he told himself.
When he allowed a woman into his bed it was only for a short season. He always expressed three things about himself very clearly: he would never be able to give them love, a relationship or children – he was not looking for those things and they were not a part of how he planned on living his life. If they could not accept these facts there was no use in bringing them to his bed.
Yet, from the beginning, he'd know everything about this woman would mess up his nice neat plan. He remembered how he had shook his head, while watching the young ensigns chase her? He'd laughed inwardly at how they foolishly couldn't tell she was the kind of woman you only go after if you intend to make her yours – the forever kind of yours...not the temporary kind that fit into his world view.
The life of a Starfleet officer – a single one – meant that you accepted a merry-go-round of partners in your life – people coming in and out of your life, as part of the life you chose. But Shawnay was not the type to go from one man's bed to another. Picard had to smile at that thought. That was one of the things that attracted him to her the most – even after he had told her the relationship would never last, it had not changed how she felt.
Their metal link had made it very clear to him that she held no illusions about him or their time together. Lieutenant Kirk wanted what she wanted – even if it was for a short time.
Worst of all, she had accepted all his terms. Lieutenant Shawnay Kirk was not daunted by his demands for distance and control. She was discrete, continuing their working relationship as if nothing was going on, but passionate and intense in private. She never said the words out loud, but he knew it every time he took her in his arms, she was in love with him. She kept her heart just as he asked, never seeking more than he was willing to give. But every time, Picard looked her in the eye, he saw it...he knew in the deepest part of his being she was in love with him and worst of all...even though he would never say it, Picard lo-...that is cared for her deeply also.
"Tis better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all," Picard said softly, truly understanding the heart of the bard.
"Chirp-Chip" the door sounded announcing his appointment was on time
"Captain, it's Troi."
"Ah yes, enter please," replied Picard.
The pneumatic doors slid open smoothly with only a whisper of sound as they admitted the senior officer.
"Hmm, well that is just too peculiar," Dr. Crusher mused aloud as she reviewed the test results, "The problem isn't with her hormone levels but her cellular regeneration rate."
To be more accurate, there wasn't really a problem with her rate of cellular regeneration either...it was perfect, absolutely one hundred percent perfect. Her metabolism and bodily functions were operating at peak efficiency at all times, taking the necessary steps to adapt around the presence of the hormone inhibitor that she was receiving.
The doctor shook her head in disbelief. Even though the Nivians were extremely long lived, none of the information that they had shared with her indicated that Lieutenant Kirk's body chemistry should be working at this level of efficiency. Ideally, Kirk's physiology should cause her cells to renew at a rate above that of typical Earth humans, about sixty-five percent, but below the average Nivian rate of seventy-four percent. Genetic cousins could be determined by a separation of less than ten percent.
On a biological level, Nivians were not that different from other humans – all of their differences: amphibious adaptations, longer life span and telepathy could be traced in part to the rate at which their cell regenerated or decayed. Cell regeneration for a human meant that every seven days their bodies replaced cells – this occurred on a decreasing logarithmic scale over the course of about 80 to 90 years, the average human life span. Part of evolution was the continual but infinitesimal shifts upward along the log scale, the mutations, or adjustments to environment, that kept the average lifespan climbing upwards.
Ideally, Nivians were the same DNA just several leaps ahead.
Or would it be more correct to say several leaps sideways? Dr. Crusher wasn't sure as there were large amounts of historical documentation to show that humans on Earth had once lived to be a thousand and older when the planet was very young. The question of Atlantis implied that once long ago some portion of the the Earth populace could also breathe underwater. So really the Nivians weren't that far ahead...they just maintained genetic abilities that earth had and lost.
Even now in the twenty-fourth century, researchers were hard at work trying to rediscover the genetic coding needed to allow humans the ability to breathe under water. On earth, even with all of the medical and scientific advances made three quarters of the world was still beyond them – innerspace was believed to be the next great adventure for man to conquer – a shining jewel to go with our mastery of space.
It had been kept very quiet, but Dr. Crusher knew that much of the testing done on Lieutenant Kirk when she first petitioned for Starfleet admission had been funneled into this DNA research. The scientist and doctors believing that her genetic code could be unraveled to show them the missing keys.
So how had they missed this? It changed all of the fundamental assumptions that the data provided by the Nivian medical directorate had shared. Instead of being a unique hybrid that lived longer than most humans but shorter than the average Nivian – Shawnay Kirk could potentially remain ageless, her body continually healing and renewing itself.
The doctor moved her fingers skillfully across the bio-med screen pulling up the test results and data for the lieutenant going back the entirety of her time with Starfleet.
Shawnay sat on the couch in her quarters. It was the first day of her weekly off time rotation – five days on duty, two days off duty . With nowhere to go and nothing to do, she found herself with entirely too much free time to ponder what tomorrow would bring in regards to her relationship with the captain.
She refused to believe that it was a mistake she should have avoided. Shawnay held no illusions about who and what she was.
Coming to Earth had not been a guarantee that she'd find this kind of happiness. It...he was more than she had hoped for. She didn't care about tomorrow – the future be damned, she just wanted to enjoy what she had now...to enjoy being in love even if he never allowed himself to love her back.
One thing was certain, had she stayed on Nivia, all choices definitely would have been taken from her. There her life would have been piteous, forced to live out her days with no hope of love or family only to be despised for her 'inferior' genetics, constantly reminded that she just weren't quite Nivian enough.
At least here and now, on the Enterprise, she could decide her future, forge her own path. On Nivia, the counsel would make sure she had no choices.
*Beep*
"Dr. Crusher to Lieutenant Kirk."
The communication interrupted the heavy thoughts that plagued the blond's mind. With a heavy heart she straightened in her seat and and answered, "Lieutenant Kirk here. Go ahead doctor."
"Lieutenant, can you come down to sickbay? I need to get a few more samples from you."
With a sigh as she stood, Shawnay replied, "Yes, doctor. I'm on my way."
Heading towards the door, she was unsure as to whether she should be grateful for something to take her mind off her serious thoughts or if she should be more worried about the doctor's continual and increasing exams and tests.
"Captain, I wanted to speak to you today about Lieutenant Kirk...I'm somewhat concerned about the effect she is having as a crew member here on the Enterprise," Troi began after she had taken her seat in the plush arm chair across from the captain's desk.
Picard arched an eyebrow in interest, leaned forward with his hands clasped and encouraged, "Go on."
"Well sir, as you know she is a telepath of unknown abilities. She has openly admitted that her range and skill was not fully ranked by the Starfleet telepath exams. So it concerns me greatly when I see the effect she has on so many of the male members of the crew. I don't know if you know this but she has been involved or the root of several altercations..."
Truly surprised, Picard raised his hand to stop the Counselor before she could continue.
"Altercations you say? Why have I not heard about this sooner? If one of my crew is hurting their crew mates I want to know about it."
Troi paused to explain, "Well, the incidents haven't all been at her hands. To my knowledge she's only personally struck three crew men – in all three cases the men sought medical care and explained their wounds off as accidents. When asked about the incidents Lieutenant Kirk explained all three occurrences as appropriate responses to crew men that tried to make unwarranted advances on her. When redressed, the crew men confirmed her version of events."
Again Picard raised an eyebrow, and asked, "You mean to tell me that three members of my crew tried to force themselves on one of my officers, then lied about the resulting injuries? And yet you seem to feel that Lieutenant Kirk is still at fault?"
"Well yes sir, when you consider the performance and records of each individual, attacking anyone is quite out of the range of their normal behavior. I have to wonder if there isn't some level of psionic interference that caused their behavioral anomalies, since the behaviors were centered only on Lieutenant Kirk."
"Hmm," Picard acquiesced with a nod, "continue."
"Additionally, there are several bets being held – bets to see which man can successfully get her to date them. Not exactly normal behavior for our crew, maybe on some other ships but not on the Enterprise. There have been reported heated arguments and most notably repeated fights documented between two of our newest crew: Julian and Jacob DuChene. At each altercation the brothers have stated they were fighting about perceived interference by the other in their attempts to seduce Lieutenant Kirk.
Upon hearing this, Picard very much wanted to laugh out loud. The antics of the twin Lotharios were indeed known to him. The brothers were each intent on capturing Lieutenant Kirk's attention, and as their duty station was Sick Bay, their behaviors had sparked many an interesting story from Dr. Crusher.
Picard endeavored to maintain the appropriate look of concern and interest as he asked, "Counselor, let me see if I can summarize what you have told me so far: Lieutenant Kirk has undefined psionic skills and you believe she may be having some sort of psi-based effect on the crew?"
"Yes, sir. I know it sounds quite benign, but I am concerned where all of this could lead. Additionally, I am aware that Dr. Crusher is seeing her daily for-"
Caught off guard, Picard interrupted, "Doctor Crusher came to you with this information? Are Commanders Riker and LaForge aware?"
Medical issues serious enough to merit the chief medical officer breaking doctor patient confidentiality, usually meant that the commanding officers and the captain were read-in if serious enough.
"Well, no she hasn't actually discussed any issues with me. More like I am unable to ignore the sense of concern that the situation is causing her – I don't know specifics, just bits and pieces, something to do with her hormones-"
"Alright, stop right there Counselor."
"But Captain..."
An upheld hand from the captain stopped any further explanation.
"As Doctor Crusher has not felt the need to broach any health issues concerning Lieutenant Kirk, I will dismiss your concerns in that area and as a matter of professionalism I highly suggest that you do the same. I do not think Doctor Crusher would appreciate your breaching her patient confidentiality with your skills."
Picard leveled his gaze on the counselor and continued, "Counselor, I think this situation needs some perspective, so I'll ask you a few questions: "First, do you believe or have evidence that Lieutenant Kirk is intentionally 'affecting' the crew?"
"No, but..."
Again the captain lifted his hand, as he poised a second question, "Have you spoken with Lieutenant Kirk about your concerns?"
"Well, no not directly."
This truly piqued Picard's curiosity. "Why not counselor? Wouldn't you have a much clearer picture if you at least knew if there was any intent on her part?"
"We have the normal weekly review meetings. But actually Captain, I am uncomfortable talking to her...I get the feeling that she surpasses my mental guards and reads me the entire time we are talking."
"Really?", Picard could not hide the concern that hearing this brought him, so he delved deeper into the subject, "Has she done anything to make you think she is invading your privacy?"
"Well, no – only the first day we meet when I was attempting to read her...it's just something about her that sets my nerves on edge."
"You expressed your original concern as to her position on the mediation team," Picard stated as he again refocused the conversation, "But she performed admirably during the initial negotiations as well as at her daily posts."
At least to the best of Troi's knowledge there had been no remarkable occurrences on Torrian, those details had stayed between the lieutenant and himself.
"Captain, I came to you because I think we need to consider the potential effects on the crew overall: discord and arguments are not normal on the Enterprise. Is she really the right person to place in such a pivotal role for negotiations that could shape a quadrant. Add to it her lack of formal training, and I believe we should be somewhat concerned – this is our only opportunity to cut off a disaster before it happens."
The captain paced before the port window, mulling the situation over silently. Deanna reached out with her senses, testing the air for errant emotions that would tell her how well her information had been received. What she sensed was a genuine desire to find a just solution.
Picard took a moment of silence to gather himself, the counselor's words were attacks that every fiber of his being told him were wrong. But he was the captain, personal feelings could not be allowed to take precedence over the needs of his ship or crew. For this reason he struggled with the need to dismiss the vague allusions, he needed to find a way to fairly evaluate and handle the situation. Thinking for a moment, Picard found his balance and then spoke calmly.
"Yes Counselor, this situation does concern me...on several levels. Let me tell you what I see. First, yes, there has been an certain amount of 'interest' by the male crew, but truth be told a similar phenomenon happened when you joined us. You were probably unaware of it as knowledge of your relationship with Commander Riker squelched it quickly. Second, I am not sure that we would be correct in assuming Lieutenant Kirk is the one we should hold responsible for how a few crew men have behaved. This is the 24rd century and I'd like to believe that we've progressed beyond blaming women for men's objectification of them."
Continuing, Picard went on, "Third, you mentioned discord amongst the crew, but I am concerned that you seem to be overlooking the discord between you and Lieutenant Kirk. It's no secret, the rocky start you had with her when she first joined the crew. And by your admission you have not attempted to repair the damaged relationship."
Try as she might, there was no way to deny the sting of the memory when Picard requested her presence in the transient guest quarters. While the rooms would seem like a paradisaical haven to a refugee rescued from disaster or war, it would never be a place to call home. Upon stepping into the room that she had assigned the then Junior Lieutenant, she had be struck by the gloom and despair she had cause the young woman by forcing her to live there. Troi had only meant for the assignment to be short lived, long enough to better grasp the true breadth of Kirk's talents and to determine if the privacy of the rest of the crew truly would be safe. Troi knew better than anyone how hard it was to be a telepath in close proximity with a thousand non-telepaths – mistakes were inevitable. And those mistakes damaged the standing of not just the guilty party but how all telepaths are perceived.
The transient guest quarters had seemed the perfect solution – except time slipped by too fast and she was unable to find an acceptable way measure Kirk's skills. So rather than take the young woman at her word, trusting her and placing her in quarters according to her rank, Troi had on more than ten occasions refused requests from Kirk – Troi had firmly believed that her actions would bear out in time. But time to find the answers that would provide a sense of security ran out when the lieutenant accompanied the captain on a diplomatic mission.
It had taken one seemingly harmless conversation, the Captain inquiring how the lieutenant liked her new life on the Enterprise. The captain hadn't been back on board half a day when she got the call to the lower decks. That moment had been embarrassing, entering the small cube. Looking back on the scene, Troi could now understand why the blond had taken her meals in Ten Forward under the watch of her libidinous crew mates. When spoken aloud her reasons sounded ungrounded and unreasonable to her also. Like the captain, Troi had never actually entered the quarters before and had been totally unaware of the living situation she had sentenced the lieutenant to – it was only meant to keep her away for the heavy press of a thousand minds, not segregate her and deprive her of access to meals. In front of the captain, Troi had offered a sincere apology, and made immediate arrangements for lieutenant grade accommodations for Kirk.
Troi was pulled from her reverie when the captain began to speak again.
"Counselor, I think you need to get to know her, understand her goals, desires – in short try to become friends with her. Because contrary to popular opinion, I am not blind to what goes on. In her time here I have not seen her with a single female friend and what concerns me now is that like you, a majority of the female crew are avoiding her because she somehow makes them nervous. I have to wonder if the complete absence of female comrades does not magnify the attention she is receiving."
Inwardly, Deanna cringed at the request, but kept her focus on the task at hand, listening closely to Captain Picard.
"Finally, I think this situation merits some creative handling to ensure that both Lieutenant Kirk is properly represented and that your concerns are not unduly dismissed."
"That being said, we have a unique opportunity to validate both possible sides of this situation without compromise. Commander Data will be assigned to review the situations you've mentioned as well as assignments given to Lieutenant Kirk. Should he find any anomalies, he can present those issues unbiased and present options for the most just resolution."
It was not quite what Troi had wanted, but it was a start. As a leader, Picard did not respond without consideration. His moral code kept him dedicated to serving the best interest of the ship and protecting his crew. True moderator that he was, he had hewn out a sound compromise for both sides of the equation.
"After we have Commander Data's assessment we can determine 'if'," and he stressed the word 'if', "there is merit to remove her from the negotiation team."
Troi gave a small sharp nod and rose from her chair. As she headed for the door, the captain added, "Oh and Deanna, thank you for coming to me with your concerns."
"Thank you, Captain"
It was the personal touch of calling her by her given name that gave Troi the greatest sense of ease. Captain Picard was a leader that one could express opposing points of view and still be heard. He trusted her instincts. Knowing that she would have Data's help, allowed her to leave with a feeling of accomplishment, sensing Picard's unwavering belief in her and her abilities.
As the door slid closed, Picard opened the comm, "Picard to Commander Data."
"Data here, sir."
"Commander Data, please report to my ready room," Picard requested.
"Aye, Captain. I'm on my way."
'No time like the present.'
Cheers!