(Thanks, especially to : garrasgothqueen, Saint Sita, vfergus, meivana, sweet-penelope, NaruHinaFanboy, Annabelle4.0, emma-nyaaan, KazumaKaname, princessyaca, Xtremefairy, yoona-unnie, blackroserocker, ImNotOddJustRare, broman2, all the Guest reviewers,)
(意欲)
'Just like old times.' Kurosaki Ichigo thought regretfully and smiled ruefully as he looked attentively at the auburn-haired beauty tendering to his wounds.
He remembered fondly how she has always tried to make him feel better after another senseless usage of his fists in yet another mindless unnecessary fight.
It was always about her.
He fought for her.
He fought about her.
He wanted to protect her.
He wished now he has the courage to admit what he did not know then or what he did not want to know, it was always about her.
His real feelings for her.
If only back then he has the courage to break down all the walls and squashed the rumors, held her tight in his arms and told her the truth.
The real truth that she has been so longing to hear.
Well, no time for regrets.
That was then.
This is now.
And now, there was only her and him, alone in a room.
He has thought she was going to bolt the minute she saw him, alone, waiting in the office, but after confirming he was indeed the one Sado has wanted her to attend to, she came in, closed the door and started to do what was requested of her.
All without saying another word.
Even requesting him to take a seat on the small couch and asking him to show her the cuts to his hands.
It was all communicated by hand signals.
Fucking polite gestures of the hands.
But at least, once again, he got to feel her soft gentle touch on him.
He never dreamt he could get to feel her hands on him again.
He missed her touch.
He missed her.
He missed everything about her.
He wanted to hear her sweet cheerful voice.
He wanted her to show her frantic concern for him.
He wanted to hear her strangely appealingly nonsensical ramblings about the going-ons in her life in her excitable manner.
He just wanted to hear her voice.
He did not want to be just another customer being patched up by one of the employee.
He knew it was but still he did not want it to be.
"There. All done."
Her softly spoken words snapped him out of his remorseful reverie. He has been so absorbed in remembering the past and hoping to hear her melodious voice inquiring about him that he did not even register any sting on his wounds.
He happened to look straight at her face just as she was facing him to get up from the couch.
He caught her 'well done' job accomplished happy face.
Then their eyes instinctively sought out the other.
In that spilt second when their eyes met, he thought he caught a familiar emotion flashed in those soft honey eyes of hers.
Dare he think it was what he hope it to be.
Then the moment was lost when she stood up.
'Stupid. Stupid. Stupid .' Inoue Orihime berated herself when in a moment of nostalgic weakness, she let her defenses down and let him know what he can still do to her.
What he still meant to her.
She should have listened to her cowardly side and escaped from being alone with him in the office. But she forced down her insecurities and bravely took to the task at hand.
It was a simple enough thing to do.
Attend to his wounds, disinfect them and bandaged the hand. Apologized to him for getting hurt in their establishment and see him out of the office.
Ignored how touching him could reignite what she thought was lost forever.
What she so desperately want not to feel anymore.
Let him go back to his friends and his... girlfriend.
And that's that.
But now that he has seen what she so desperately did not want him to see, she knew he was going to ask her about it.
She decided to ignore his questioning gaze, she will be strong.
Never again will she allow him to hurt her.
"I am sorry you got cut by one of our flimsy glasses. If you do intend to see a doctor for further treatment, we will be more than willing to compensate you on your physician bill." She bowed politely to him. "Your friends and girlfriend must be worried about you. You should be getting back to them." She told him in as much as an emotionless manner as she could and plastered a fake smile on her face.
Orihime walked to the door and began to open the door. She wiped off any emotion from her pale face before turning to look at him. "Goodbye Kurosaki-san." Her shaking hand on the door handle, she opened the door wider, intending to usher him out of the office and... out of her life, again.
She jumped in surprise and her honey eyes widened when he covered her hand with his bandaged hand and shut the door closed, effectively trapping her between the door and his hard body.
Slowly his hand moved from hers and lightly teased his way up to her shoulder. His calloused fingers enjoyed the smoothness of her soft skin as they felt her skin tingled beneath his touch. He moved her long silky hair from her ear, bent down and said huskily, "Look at me, Hime."
She shook her head furiously.
What was he trying to do?
"Look at me, Hime." He repeated. This time with more force in the tone of his voice.
There was a soft thud.
Both his hands were placed on either sides of her head.
Startled, she turned around and glanced nervously into his heated chocolate eyes, "K-Kurosaki-s-san?" She stammered, she was back to the stuttering blushing high school girl trying to speak to her crush.
She clenched her shaking hands together.
She hated feeling like this.
She hated the carefree romantic memories it brought back.
She hated... him.
She closed her eyes, inhaled deeply, let out her fears and opened her eyes.
"Kurosaki-san, what are you..." She began with nary a stutter but he cut her off by wrapping his big hand behind her back and slammed her close towards him.
Soft curves met hard muscles.
Two hearts were beating as one.
Their fierce pounding matching each other.
"K-Kurosaki-s-san?!" Caught off guard by his unexpected bold action, Orihime still have the presence of her confused mind to push at his chest. She felt his muscles twitched when her trembling palms made contact.
She heard a sharp intake of breath.
"Look at me, Orihime. Look at what you can still do to me."
She could not.
She dared not.
She stopped with the pushing at his chest.
She kept her eyes down.
"Kurosaki-san, please let go of me." She ordered him softly.
Ichigo stared down at the luscious hair that he used to love playing with. How he has loved to just ran his fingers through the satiny silk like threads. His hand was within inches of twirling her hair with his fingers.
"Kurosaki-san."
He pulled her even closer towards him when she addressed him in such a cold formal way. He tilted her quivering chin up for her to look directly in his face. Firmly, he held her chin as she tried to look away. "Don't call me that, Hime." He almost growled out the warning.
That did it.
How dared he.
How dared he order her to do anything?!
How dared him to tease her like she was some kind of weak lovelorn jilted lover?!
How dared he!
Anger slowly replaced the nervousness and the tiniest unwanted longing of wanting to see his handsome scowling face again.
Her small shaking hands became tiny fists.
Thump.
She hit him on his chest with her balled-up fists.
"How dare you!"
Thump.
"How dare you to order me to do anything!"
Thump.
"Don't call me 'Hime'! I am not and I was never your 'Hime'! And I will never be your 'Hime'!"
Thump.
"I hate you! I hate you! I... "
Ichigo did not want to hear those venomous words coming from his princess's mouth and so he silenced her with his mouth.
He kissed her.
He took.
He took from her.
Whatever he wanted.
As always.
(意欲)
"K-Kurosaki-k-kun, we should be s-studying."
"We are studying, Hime. And we are alone now, so you know what you should be calling me."
"B-But, K-Kuro... I-Ichigo-kun, we have not been studying. W-We have not touched any of our text books nor have we done any revision."
"The only thing I want to study, the only thing I want to touch and the only thing I want to do is you, Hime."
"B-But... "
"No buts, Hime. Don't you like me kissing you?"
" ... "
"Hime?"
"I-I love you, Ichigo-kun."
"So, I will take that as a yes."
"Yes, Ichigo-kun. But I am afraid."
"Of me?"
"N-No. Not of you Ichigo-kun. Never of you. I am afraid of what will happen if we continue with what we are doing."
"That would not be so bad, would it? Don't you want to give yourself to me, fully, to become one with me? We could be each other's firsts. You said you love me, Hime. Remember, forever and ever. Or were those only empty words? Don't you love me, Hime?"
"O-Of course, I do. You know I love you so very much, Ichigo-kun. Forever and ever and ... always."
"Then, there's shouldn't be any problem, should it? I know you truly, really love me with all your heart, body and soul. And I l... "
"And you what, Kurosaki-kun? Do you love me?"
"It's Ichigo, O-ri-hi-me. And I am sorry. I like you. I like you a lot. I really, really like you, but I don't know if it is love yet. Could you please just continue to wait for just awhile longer? I know I should not string you along like this, but being with you makes me happy. Can you be patient and give me a little more time? I promise you, it won't be long till you hear the three words you so desperately want to hear from me."
"Ichigo-kun ..."
"That's right, Hime. I want you to say my name when you are finally truly mine. Promise me I will be your only one, now and forever. Promise me, Hime. Say it."
"Y-Yes, Ichigo-kun, I will always be yours and only yours, now and forever."
"And always, Hime. And always."
"And always I will be forever yours and only yours, Ichigo-kun."
(いよく)