Ok, sorry this took so long, a combination of sickness, a death in extended family, and me moving out of my old room into a larger room kind of postponed this story for a good bit.
Ok, now.
TheRazgrizDragon: You. Yes, you. I love you.
Why do I love you? Simple. I was pissed off for a little bit. It starts with the other story I posted the other day. My Naruto x familiar of zero cross. I was REALLY down because of it. Why, you ask? simple. I post the thing and go to sleep, wake up, 20 FUCKING PM's telling me "Hey, you fucked up Itachi's character." ...well not in those exact words since curse words get censored through PM's But they were strongly worded letters telling me in no uncertain terms that I Quote-unquote "Fucked up."
I took a massive hit to the ego from that, not that my ego needed to be that high in the first place but that's beside the point. What is the point is that I had a decent idea, a decent continuation from the previous chapter, but everybody said I was moving too fast, and rereading the chapter slowly and taking in everything I wrote. I agree, and that's just depressing.
I had to rewrite the chapter and repost it because I kept getting PM's with people yelling at me, and that pissed me off, not only that but it was SOOOOO difficult because nothing would stay on the page. *Writes ten lines* *Reads* FUUUUUU *Erases* *Repeat for three hours*
Now here I am venting in the authors notes... BUT FUCK THAT, cuz you dude, *Points at TheRazgrizDragon* Yes you, you deserve a fucking cookie. I'm going through my emails and I see 20 PM's for my Itachi story and they're all angry and I'm like FUUUUU. I check a bit later and see a new review for sage and I'm like "...I don't know if I can take anymore rage!" *clicks* *reads* *Processing* FUCK YES. Wall of text not withstanding. You cheered me up dude and helped me write another chapter of Itachi:Familiar of Zero AND this chapter right here. So give this motherfucker a damn cookie
This guy right here. -TheRazgrizDragon - Him, yes him. Click on his shit and give him a fucking cookie. Take five seconds, click his name, go to his shit, send him a PM, WITH COOKIE ATTACHED
Preferably not a tracking cookie or any malicious cookies, he doesn't deserve that. What he does deserve is a nice fresh and warm out of the oven cookie, topped with five star topping goodness.
Fuck yeah.
So do it.
Do it now.
Also, just for him, some of his ideas are going in the story. Fuck yeah.
Second off: To my anon reviewer MasterOfWords. Did I ever claim that I was writing an amazing piece of literature? No, I didn't. Personally, I like writing harems and comedy, and frankly I don't care if my story is shit. I am writing this for MY enjoyment, I like posting it on this site because I like hearing what people think of the story and allowing other people to enjoy what I do .
You claim that I don't have any amazing elemental battles in this story? You stopped at chapter 7, the wave arc has some nice element battles and in this chapter Naruto is facing Orochi-fucking-maru, how are those not good battles? Sure, it does take a bit to get to the fighting but so does most every story. I will admit you're right about the Kakashi fight, I never really liked the bell test. I was pumped to kick Kakashi's ass but I really couldn't feel it that chapter. So if you want to blame me for that then fine.
You're complaining about Naruto marrying Anko at 7? You do realize that there are people who are put into arranged marriages before they are even born right? In some countries they are in fact married when they come out of the womb. So they are married before they are even 1 year old. Those people weren't given a choice, Naruto was and he chose too because he saw Anko as more of an older sister up until they started fooling around and then the lemon during chapter 13.
Speaking of lemons, 15 chapters. 100K+ words. 1 Lemon.
"and will be focused on your perverted need and desire to write useless smut."
Yeah, because 1 lemon in this already large story is useless smut? Hell I don't even have any more lemons currently planned yet, I kinda just add them in when I feel like it. Which is basically how I write this story. I take established canon and fuck with it. I plan on diverting at some point but most of the stuff that happens independent of Naruto is going to happen at some point. So don't get your panties in a twist over it. I have 1 text doc that has all my ideas and stuff in it. My outlines for a chapter are minimal at best, here's an example for my 4th chapter
Ch 4: next day, more Naruto bonding stuff (Probably the shower), shopping with anko, ****Sarutobi spying on them and thinking to himself****
"That is basically how my chapters are set up, pretty much I do all this stuff on the fly in my head, I however do keep another text doc that has all the little scenes I want to add and skew. The Haku meeting and convincing Zabuza scene were this.
And finally A good trolling is those that have an element of truth. If you are indeed a troll then I have something to tell you.
"I ain't even mad"
My story has over a 190 reviews, (95% of which are at the very least somewhat positive) 90,000 views, 15 C2's, 430+ Faves and 420+ alerts. Clearly someone likes the story, which has been and shall always remain a adventure/humor story at heart, its in that section for a reason. So until you get an account and tell me what you told me to my face instead of hiding behind that little bitch wall of anonymity, write your own damn story and see if it's that popular. Till then, kindly stfu.
OK, back on track now... Let it be known that I hate writing the actual written part of the chunin exams. I blame my long seeded hatred for homework and tests, so yeah, fuck that
Let it also be known that I dub this chapter the old spice chapter, for this chapter was birthed in the crucible of old spice guy commercials. Anything is possible when you read my story and don't take it too seriously like that douche bag anon reviewer.
I'm on a summon.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, nor do I make any money off it."
-ooo-
"speech"
'Thoughts'
"Kyubi speech"
'Kyubi thoughts'
-ooo-
Chapter 16: Snake women, Snake men and evil hickey's
"Anko...what're you doing?" Haku asked the snake mistress curiously as she had been walking casually to meet the Hokage to find out what she should be doing now that she was a ninja of Konoha, when she had come across the snake mistress messing with a large...canon like thing
"What's it look like I'm doing?" She snapped back, loading a large black tarp like thing into the barrel.
"Honestly...I have no idea." Haku mused, looking over the contraption, then staring off in the direction the device was pointed. "You're planning to launch yourself into the academy building aren't you?"
"Yep, they chose me to fuck with some genin and that's exactly what I'm going to do."
"Well...have fun with that." The ice mistress turned on her heels and continued her walk to the Hokage Tower.
-ooo-
"What the hell are you doing?" Zabuza asked curiously, coming up on the snake mistress only a few minutes later, having the same idea as Haku since they hadn't really been told what they should be doing right now with the chunin exams locking down most of the higher ranked missions for them to do.
"What's it look like I'm doing?" she snapped like before, getting a tad irritated that people kept asking her the same damn question.
"Hmm." Zabuza stared at the cannon, then looked over his shoulder at the building it was pointed at curiously. "You're planning to launch yourself into that building over there...isn't that where the chunin exams are taking place?"
"Yep, fucking with Genin, getting paid to do it and Naruto is in the exams, so this is going to be fun.
"Heh, the Gaki is in this thing? I might just join you in there."
"Nah." She waved a hand in front of her face. "Too cramped, Go chill at the tower in the forest of death they're gonna have the next part of the exams in the forest of death."
Zabuza snorted. "They still have those there?"
"Yeah and if enough people survive the forest they're saying that they might have some prelims this year, so if you want to watch some genin beat the snot out of each other head there.
"Oh, I just might." The ex mist jonin grinned ferally. "If the gaki is in this thing, he's going to wreck just about everyone." He chuckled again and walked off for the Hokage tower."
-ooo-
"For all the people left in the room..." Ibiki growled, staring out over the chunin hopefuls, most of them holding their breath in one way or another. Mere moment's before he had done his 10th question spiel and quite a few teams left, chickening out rather than take the question and risk their future. Those weaklings would never make chunin. But this batch...this batch held promise, especially the Blonde idiot that had thrown him off his cool earlier in the test... hell he still had the two women sitting in his lap...lucky bastard.
"You all pass." The scarred man grinned, much to the confusion of the room.
'Told you, pay up.' Naruto chuckled under his breath as Kyubi started grumbling about troublesome blondes and their thrice damned luck.
"I'll pay you with some useful information later, why I tried to bet against you I'll never know." The grumbling continued as Ibiki explained the reason behind the test and yadda yadda yadda. The old scarred bastard could yak like the worst of them and to top it off he was totally boring while he did it.
'At least Sakura didn't give up, I was about to lay down the law when she started raising her hand, I guess she has more confidence in herself now.
Suddenly Ibiki froze, glancing at the widows to his right. Not a moment later the windows shattered and a large black...something flew in, throwing kunai into the floor and ceiling.
"Three guesses who that is." Kyubi chuckled. Naruto just snorted in agreement, even if he couldn't sense the woman's chakra, Anko had a very...special way to make an entrance...namely the batshit insane way.
"Alright Maggots listen up!" the ball yelled still in it's twirl to release Anko while pinning up a sheet that had the words 'The beautiful and sexy proctor of the second test has arrived! Anko Mitarashi!'
"Proctors seem to love calling you all maggots, I wonder why that is?"
'Eh who cares, I'm enjoying my sexy lady show right now.'
"True, true." The fox nodded, watching Anko land on her feet after the sheet thing had settled.
"The names Anko Mitarashi and I'll be your proctor for the second stage of the exams." Anko stared out over the group of chunin hopefuls. "Damn Ibiki you must be slipping. Twenty-six teams? I expected half that.
Ibiki appeared from behind the sheet that had blocked his view of the room, a small smirk on his lips. "Maybe we just have a good bunch this year, especially the blonde playboy over there." He raised a finger in Naruto's direction and Anko's face lit up.
"Hey gaki, how'd you do?" She grinned.
"Heh, made out with two hot women in front of hundred's of ninja and played a prank on Ibiki, You?" Naruto chuckled as most of the genin in the room were giving them a curious glance.
Anko chuckled "Nice, and you know me, I wouldn't pass up the chance to fuck with some greenhorns."
Naruto just shook his head. "I know I shouldn't be surprised by that, so what's crackin sexy? Where's the next stage of the exams?"
Anko snorted at that "You're gonna love this one, they picked training ground 44 this year."
Naruto froze, then a small grin formed on his lips. "Training ground 44?" He let Temari and Hinata off his lap, one knew what was going on the other was quite clueless. "Ohhh this is going to be fun." Naruto cackled evilly.
"Wait wait wait." One random genin stood up staring at the snake mistress angrily. "We heard earlier that you were that guys sensei." He pointed to Naruto. He turned to Ibiki "Isn't that a conflict of interest?"
Naruto and Anko stood there for a moment taking in the genin's words, then looked back at each other, then back to the genin before busting out laughing, both rolling on the floor holding their ribs nearly dying of laughter.
The genin that stood up now stared in barely hidden shock then anger. "What's so funny, that's a legitimate question, a proctor shouldn't have any attachments to the participants of the test, they could help them cheat."
If anything the two's laughter increased.
"Ohohoho my Kami that is hysterical." Naruto laughed, finally making it to his feet. "Listen here numbnuts." He poked a finger at the genin, the rest of the participants staring on quietly as the insanity unfolded. "That woman over there." He threw a thumb over his shoulder at the still laughing Anko. "Her idea of survival training is dumping you in the wilderness in the middle of winter in nothing but your boxers and a dull, rusty Kunai." He fixed the genin with a playful glare. "So don't think she'll go easy on me in this test, if anything she'll make it harder on me just to make this whole thing more interesting for her." Naruto glanced over at Anko who was just now getting to her feet. "By the way did you start a betting pool on how many asses I kick this time around sexy?"
Anko snorted. "As if, I learned my lesson last time when you cleared out all our wallets with that stupid stunt you pulled. How many Anbu did it take to catch you that time, 26?"
"27." He corrected her, walking over to the woman. Shocking all the people in the room again at how he could evade so many high level ninja. "So let's get this fucker started, Gaki away!" Naruto yelled leaping out the broken window.
"You heard the gaki" She hooted, leaping out the window after the blond. "Meet us at training ground 44. Sexy away!"
The room was silent for a good minute before anyone even tried to say anything.
"Anyone else disturbed by that." kiba spoke in the deathly quiet room. A chorus of nods answered him.
-ooo-
"Welcome everyone" Anko raised her hands in front of the gate to training ground 44. " To the Forest of Death!" she cackled as several flashes of lightning and evil laughter appearing out of nowhere despite the fact that it was a sunny day and no one was in the forest yet.
"What the heck was that!?" Kiba shouted.
"Oh" Naruto grinned, his fangs creeping over his bottom lip, making it almost feral. "It's Just the natural ambiance of the place."
"And how would you know?"
"Um." Naruto rolled his eyes and shook his head like Kiba was an idiot. "I'd think I'd know where my house is."
Kiba's jaw dropped. "You LIVE in there" He pointed to the densely packed tree line where loud yips and howls of large predatory animals could be heard "...what the fuck is wrong with you!?"
Murmurs came from most of the people around them as Kiba started bitching about how unfair this all was.
"Oh quite being a chicken shit Kiba" Naruto walked to the edge of the fence and threw a kunai into one of the limbs of a tree about 20 yards away. A small screech came from within followed by a small rustling as a house cat sized bug of some unknown variety fell out. "See." Naruto turned around to face the other genin. "Just keep an eye on your ass and you'll be fine."
"As much fun as is watching you scare genin Gaki." Anko broke in, holding up a stack of papers. "You all need to sign these release forms before we get the test started."
A couple calls of 'why?' came from a few of the genin.
"Because" She spoke cheerfully. "If you guys don't sign it and die in there Konoha will be liable for your death and we can't have that." A couple loud gulps came from some of the greener teams but an equal number of glares met the woman's own, showing that a good portion of the genin didn't care for her threats. She held up two scrolls one black the other white. "These two scrolls are what you're going to be fighting over in there. Heaven and Earth. You'll need one of each to continue on to the third part of the exams, each team gets one and you'll only get it when your entire team has signed their consent forms."
"Yo Sexy" Naruto yelled from. "What're the rules of engagement in there? Can we do whatever the hell we want or what?"
"Shut it gaki, I was just getting to that." She held up a scroll with a map of the area on it. "Training ground 44. A ring of forest 10 kilometers from its center in every direction, a tower sits in the center of the forest along with a river that runs through most of the training ground. You have 5 days to get the other half of your scrolls and make it to the tower in one piece. If you lose a teammate during the test you're automatically disqualified. If you leave the forest before the time limit is over you're disqualified and if you look at the content of your scrolls before you reach the tower you're also disqualified."
"Why's that last one disqualify you?" Tenten piped up from the back.
Anko turned an irritated glare at the mouse bun-haired girl. "Because girly, sometimes ninja are entrusted with confidential information, so this will be a test on trustworthiness but don't forget that this is first and foremost a survival test." She glared at all the people in the clearing. "You'll be facing both nature and each other in there. So the last piece of advice I'll give is-" She turned away from the group handing the stack of papers to a couple of chunin for distribution. "-Don't die." She waved behind her as she walked off to mingle with the other chunin there.
"She is such a badass."
'I know, it makes me all tingly inside knowing that I can tap that whenever the hell I want.' Naruto stared after his first wife, her trenchcoat doing little to hide her firm derriere from his hungry gaze.
"Alright Romeo, go sign your papers and let's go crack some skulls."
'Alright alright.' Naruto chuckled internally walking with his team over to the booth to turn in their consent forms for a scroll.
Half an hour later we find every team at their own gate surrounding the forest.
"Naruto, you got our heaven scroll safe?"
"Yeah Sasuke." The blonde whispered. "It's in a seal on my arm."
"Good" Sasuke nodded. "Keep it close and let's go after the first team we can, I say we hit that sound team, they were radiating killing intent our way all through the first exam."
"Eh, we'll hit who we find, unless its a team from Konoha. We don't fight comrades alright?"
His two teammates nodded to the affirmative.
A loud siren rang out over the area and the gates snapped open. "Alright!" Naruto pumped his fist. "Let's go kick some ass!" As each team rushed into the forest.
-ooo-
"You know the plan." A kusa Genin hissed to her two teammates as they rushed through the gate. "Separate them, but leave the blonde one, he's caught my interest as well."
"Yeah." The two agreed.
'Naruto Uzumaki. You've just become very interesting kukukuku.'
-ooo-
"That was easy." Kiba barked, grabbing the earth scroll from a trapped team of konoha genin only a few minutes into the test.
"Yes, it was." Hinata agreed, Shino nodding next to her.
"Well we've already got our scroll let's head for the tower.
"Hai"
-ooo -
"Please no, have mercy!" A nondescript shinobi pleaded.
"No." Gaara droned. "Sand Burial"
"AHHhhh"
"And there goes another one." Kankura grimaced. "How many does that make now?"
"Eight." Temari scrunched her nose up as another wave of blood rocketed up into the air "Make that nine. Gaara must really be excited for this exam, I haven't seen him kill this many people in a long time."
"Eh, it's probably that Uzumaki brat you were kissing earlier." Kankuro gave the woman a scandalous look. "Seems the brat really got under Gaara's skin."
"Oh shut up Kankuro." Temari huffed. "Naruto is cute and since Gaara is Gaara, I haven't been able to get a date, ever. I'm taking what I can get."
"Temari." Gaara's dull voice asked behind her, making the woman jump at how close he was, Kankuro was praying for her soul and sanity as they spoke. "Do you like that Uzumaki boy?" Temari turned to stare at her sand using brother cautiously as he approached her, the dried up husks of his latest victims laying behind him.
"Y-yes." She nodded slowly, slightly concerned by the way that he was looking at her.
"I see." He turned away from his two siblings and started walking towards the tower. "Hmm, maybe I shouldn't kill him then...perhaps I should only torture him." He mused to himself, walking back over to another downed shinobi and squashing him like a grape.
Kankuro and Temari were walking behind him when Kankuro whispered to Temari "Did Gaara just say he wasn't going to kill something?"
"I-I think so."
"I'm scared Temari..."
"Me too..."
-ooo-
"Contact." Naruto whispered, stopping his teammates. "In the tree's ahead and to our right." Naruto had removed his hat allowing his ears to poke out proudly, providing a better understanding of their surroundings.
"What do you want to do?" Sasuke asked.
"I'm going to sneak around and take him from behind. " Naruto sensed ahead for a moment before creating a shadow clone. "Keep walking forward and pretend he's not there."
Sasuke and Sakura nodded, grabbed the clone and kept walking, while Naruto himself used his hours of hide and don't get stabbed training from Anko to sneak up on a lone Ame shinobi who was watching his teammates and clone, looking for a place to strike.
Not even bothering with the killing the poor bastard , he snuck up behind the oblivious genin and struck him in the back of the neck, knocking him out. Grabbing him before he fell to his death Naruto hopped down to his teammates.
"These guys really need to learn to be aware of their surroundings" Naruto tsked. "I almost feel bad for this guy."
"Yeah, but he's still an enemy."
"That's why I said almost Sasuke" Naruto dug through the genin's pouch and pulled out an earth scroll. "Hah, this dumbass had the scroll on him, how stupid can you be?" Naruto just shook his head. "Now that we got both our scrolls lets make like a ninja and get the fuck out of here."
After thirty minutes of tree hopping the team landed on a large branch to take a breather.
"Alright, we're almost half way there already." Naruto pointed ahead of him and to the right. "Up ahead about 1500 meters is the river that goes through the center of this place. We reach it, then haul ass to the tower, hopefully we'll be the first ones there and there won't be anyone waiting for us, if there is then keep your eyes peeled alright?"
A pair of nods answered him.
"Good, now since you two don't know you're way around here we'll go over the general topog-" Naruto suddenly stiffened, eye's going wide. Almost immediately 10 clones of him phased into existence and spun around, flashing through handsign's at a speed neither of the two genin behind him had seen from him before. Naruto then inhaled deeply, gathering an immense amount of chakra for a genin, hell immense for most jonin even. Just then a loud roar could be heard and looking farther into the dark forest Sakura and Sasuke could see a large force of some kind tearing through the tree limbs, snapping the several foot think branches like toothpicks.
"Wind Release: Daitoppa" All 10 Naruto's exhaled at the same time, sending a similar technique out, which formed into one large wave of wind.
The two techniques clashed, pushing against each other for several long seconds until Naruto's technique failed, which surprised both his teammates. Thankfully the other wind technique had lost most of its power during the collision. It still would have knocked the three genin off the branch they were standing on if they hadn't anchored themselves to the tree with chakra.
The three genin were just getting back to their feet when a distinct clapping was heard.
"Good, very good kukukukuku." a dark chuckling laughed echoed around them, none of them able to pinpoint it until a woman with a Kusa headband hopped down from a tree above and towards where the other Daitoppa had appeared from. "I didn't expect that to be stopped so easily, you continue to impress Naruto-kun." A suffocating killing intent washed over the area as the woman leveled a playful glare their way. "How about we play a little game?" She chuckled evilly, the killing intent nearly doubling, sending Sakura to her knees, Sasuke was having a better time of it having felt Naruto's killing intent on the bridge in wave, and Naruto was standing there, beads of sweat forming on his brow, this...thing was putting out almost as much killing intent as he could manage at full anger...and the blonde didn't think that this woman was even a little miffed about anything, so this was all just...fake? That thought sent a shiver of fear down the normally fearless jinchuriki's spine.
Sasuke stared at the woman, taking several deep breaths to calm his beating heart as several images of his painful death flashed through his mind. 'What the hell is this guy? He's putting out so much killing intent it isn't even funny.' He stared back at Sakura, who had almost passed out from the pressure the woman exuded. A quick smack to the cheek roused her however.
"S-Sasuke." Sakura blinked, rubbing her aching cheek, then her eyes again landed on the Kusa genin. "We have to get out of here, she's too dangerous."
"Kukukuku, The girl there is smart I see." A wicked grin spread across her face. "But it won't matter regardless, you'll never outrun me. A predator always catches it's prey one way or another." The bloodlust pouring off of the woman by now was starting to affect the animals around them now.
"Sasuke, get ready to fight, I don't think this bitch is kidding, I doubt I'd be able to outrun her." A tense nod answered him.
"Good, you at least know when you've been cornered and when to fight at your best." The woman chuckled in that strange throaty chuckle she seemed to enjoy using.
"Sakura." Naruto whispered behind him. "Keep out of this fight, lay some traps if you think they'll help but don't try to fight directly." Another nod answered him.
"Kukukuku, I think it's time we begin." The woman cackled, rushing forward to strike at the three genin.
The three scattered Sakura falling back to hide in the surrounding trees and lay some traps, while Naruto and Sasuke leapt to the side, with the Kusa genin between them
"Sasuke, fire!"
"Right!" The two flew through several handseals before bringing a hand up to their mouth.
"Fire Release: Great Fireball Technique" The breathed out a torrent of flames at the same time, immolating the spot where their attacks met.
When the flames cleared there was no sign of the enemy genin.
"Did we get her?" Sasuke asked cautiously.
"I highly doubt that" Naruto replied, that would be too easy.
"You're right." A voice whispered in his ear. Naruto's eyes widened. Reacting on instinct, a tazer already on the tips of his fingers striking out behind him, what he didn't expect was the woman to dodge the surprise attack like it was nothing. Going low into the serpent stance Naruto launched a dozen strikes at the woman, both hands powered by a tazer. However, every strike was dodged or diverted in a shocking display of skill, something that was on par with Jonin level taijutsu or higher. The woman laughed in his face as he tried desperately to land a hit.
"You seem to be having trouble Naruto-kun, maybe I should help you?" And by help she meant placing her foot right into Naruto's sternum stopping his forward momentum cold, eyes flying wide as blood flew from his mouth.
"Naruto!" Sasuke yelled dropping down from above to land a kick to the Kusa genin's head, only for it to turn to mud under his strike. "Fuck!" Sasuke ran over to his downed teammate, helping him to his feet. "That woman isn't normal."
"You're telling me." Naruto grunted, rubbed his bruised ribs. "She hits like a damn Jonin, and if I hadn't ran a bit of earth chakra through my bones at the last moment I'd probably have a couple broken ribs right now. " Naruto pulled himself from Sasuke's grasp, favoring one side of his body. "We need to come up with a plan"
"You think I'll give you the chance?" A voice said behind them slamming a foot down into the place they were standing just moments before.
Spiderweb like cracks formed in the wood as the two genin leapt forward, spinning around into a crouch to face the woman.
"You both have nice reflexes, but you need to be more aware of your surroundings." The woman tsked slightly. "Come, both of you show me your Kekkei Genkai and make this fight a little more interesting."
The two boys glanced at each other for a moment before nodding. One's eyes turned a bright crimson while the other started going through several handsign's for a elemental jutsu.
Rushing forward Sasuke pulled out several Shuriken and threw them at the grass nin, who easily dodged the straight forward attack. Grunting in Irritation the Uchiha pulled out a kunai. The two ninja met in a clash of steel, the woman holding a Kunai in her hand as well.
"Show me what those eyes can do." She hissed hungrily, making Sasuke shiver slightly but he wouldn't back down from anyone, especially not this pedo bitch. The next few seconds were a frantic clash of steel and taijutsu as Sasuke used what skills he had and the foresight of his Sharingan to block, dodge or otherwise deflect the Kusa genin's incoming attacks. But despite his best effort and superior eyes, the woman was just too skilled, too strong and above all too fast.
"You alright Sasuke?" Naruto pulled his teammate to his feet after he was knocked back by the kusa genin.
"I've felt better" He turned a glare on his teammate. "What the hell were you doing while I was getting my ass kicked?"
Naruto rolled his eyes. "Planning, you ass. The bitch has an amazing taijutsu style." Naruto narrowed his eyes, speaking loud enough for the woman to hear. "Snake style if I'm not mistaken." Naruto had a hunch on who the woman actually was, after all there were only three living practitioners of the snake style currently alive, and only one of them would be able to pull off a Jutsu of that power.
"Kukukukukuku" The woman chuckled. "Very perceptive of you, I guess Anko-chan taught you my style fairly well from what I saw earlier, you modified it for your body type if I'm not mistaken, correct?"
"Correct, Orochimaru..."
The women laughed again, reaching a hand up to her face to grab the skin there, and in a sickening display ripped the skin from her face to reveal the pale skin and yellow eyes of Anko's hated teacher. "Was I really that obvious Naruto-kun?" The now male voice hissed, amused.
"Only one person other than me and Anko knows the Snake Style and only you're strong enough to force a wind jutsu like mine back with one of your own."
"How very perceptive." Orochimaru clapped his hands together a couple times mockingly. "That still doesn't change the fact that you're fighting me now does it?" A vicious gleam came to his eye as he stared down the two genin.
Naruto tensed. Here he was, the bastard that had made Anko's life hell and he couldn't do a thing about it, just the man's presence was making his bones hurt. There was still a vast plateau of power difference between him and the Snake Sanin and Orochimaru knew it, he was just toying with them. "Sasuke." Naruto whispered. "We need to distract him long enough to get the hell out of here. There's no way in hell we're taking Orochi-fucking-maru in a straight up fight."
"I'm all ears, what's the plan?"
"Twin hook, followed by hoarfrost. You think we can do that then make a run for it?"
Sasuke ran the plan through his head for a moment before nodding. "You better make it massive though, I don't think this guys notices anything but wide scale and highly destructive."
"Can do. Go!" Naruto and Sasuke rushed forward, each running to one side of the massive limb coming at the Snake Sanin from the side. Naruto pulled out his ninjato, running wind chakra down the blade. Sasuke did the same with a kunai and lightning chakra, Naruto having shown him how right before the exams.
'What are they up to?' Orochimaru wondered curiously, dodging the strikes the two genin tried to land on him, knowing he wouldn't be able to block the element enhanced blades, falling back a few feet the man regurgitated his katana, kusanagi from a snake within his mouth. Now, brandishing his longer blade the twin attacks from the two genin let loose a ring of steel on steel.
"Naruto!" Sasuke yelled as his kunai was knocked aside by the Kusanagi, the only thing saving him from being stabbed was Naruto's ninjato having to be blocked instead.
"Got it." Naruto yelled, forming several handseals. 8 clones flickered to life, four shadow and four water clones each of them pairing off and surrounding Orochimaru as Sasuke and the original Naruto leapt back.
The four water clones in the front held up a single handseal. "Water Release: Kirigakure no Jutsu" The air in front of them filled with a heavy mist.
The clones behind the first set grabbed ahold of their water clone cousins and yelled "Ice Release: Daihyōbakuha" In a loud bang the shadow clones exploded, spraying the remains of their brethren at the hidden mist jutsu, the mist then began to freeze rapidly as the hyōton jutsu took effect, encasing the area surrounded in mist in a solid block of ice.
The two genin glanced at each other for a moment before they turned tail and ran, booking it as quickly as they could to the tower, the two tensed slightly when a rustle of bushes sounded from their left, but they relaxed a moment later when Sakura appeared next to them.
"You think that will hold him Naruto?" Sakura asked quickly falling in line next to the fleeing duo.
"If it doesn't then I don't know what will." Naruto replied.
Sasuke stared behind them, Sharingan still active. "Just who was that guy Naruto?"
Naruto glanced over at his teammate. "What, You didn't pay attention in history class Sasuke?"
Sasuke shrugged. "Did you?"
"Touche." Naruto conceded. "Well. you two at least know of the title Sanin right?"
A pair of nods answered him.
"Well that was Orochimaru, the Snake Sanin and one of Konoha's most wanted missing nin." Here Naruto's face twisted in a scowl. "He's also my sworn enemy and a damn pedophile as well."
"And what the hell is he doing here?" Sasuke cursed. Seriously, why the hell was a missing nin and a Sanin of all things fucking around in a chunin exam of all things?
"Orochimaru's a scientist Sasuke." Naruto spoke tonelessly. "And that's a very loose definition of the word." A grimace crossed his features. "The guy experiments on anything he has an interest in, his biggest dream is to master every ninjutsu in the world."
"That's...Impossible." Sakura said.
"Yeah." Naruto agreed. "For any mortal and normal person... but one of Orochimaru's biggest experiments was a way for him to cheat death and above that were his experiments on bloodlines so that he could gain access to all spheres of elemental techniques, that means my bloodlines and your eyes are probably a big interest to him Sasuke."
A shiver went up Sasuke's spine. If that bastard wanted his eyes then he'd have to pry them out of his cold dead eye sockets first. Another shiver went up his spine when he realized that the man probably could and would do that anyway...
"Let's just get out of her- Naruto!" Sasuke refocused back on the path ahead just in time to duck a kick aimed at his head. Naruto wasn't so lucky.
The blow blindsided the blonde genin and launched him towards a tree where he slammed into the bark of the aged wood, sending spiderweb cracks through it as the blow to his head knocked him out cold.
Standing where the blow had struck was a very frayed and very pissed Orochimaru. His clothing was ripped in several places and there were even a few red lines of blood where his skin shedding ability hadn't healed all the damage the blonde brat had dealt him. He hadn't expected a mass exploding ice clone-hidden mist combination, hell he had never even heard of the two techniques being used together before.
"I grow tired of these games. Orochimaru growled, approaching the Uchiha menacingly.
Sasuke backpedaled away from the powerful man, quickly going through handsign's for a "Lightning release: Thunder Lance" He had to settle for using the lightning chakra for a tazer as Orochimaru rushed, launching several punches and kicks, setting the boy back on his heels.
Sasuke cursed as he ducked under several strikes that would have definitely broken something had he not used his eyes to divert the path of the attack just slightly. Flicking a quick glance back at his teammate he couldn't help but curse again seeing the unconscious Uzumaki laying against the tree he had struck. 'Dammit Naruto I could use some help!'
Naruto of course heard none of this, unconsciousness could be a right bitch sometimes.
-Meanwhile in Naruto's busted up head-
"Ugh...what the hell hit me?
"Orochimaru hit you, and you are suffering from a concussion where you struck that tree" Kyubi's voice responded quietly, trying her best not to aggravate the blonde's already serious wounds.
"Wonderful..." Naruto rubbed his head gently, already feeling the phantom pains from his conscious mind as they told him in no uncertain terms that shit was fucked up. Kyubi noticed his discomfort and approached him from behind, laying a hand on the blonde's head, sending a small bit of her chakra there to stop the pain.
"I'm already sending chakra through your body to help heal the damage, but it won't be fast enough to continue your fight against Orochimaru." Her voice was subdued as she relayed this information to him.
"Dammit!" Naruto curse. "If only we could make it to the tower and backup." He laid his head in his hands and rubbed it gently. "Do you think flooding my system with your chakra would work kyu?" He spoke finally, raising his head from his palms. "At least enough to charge me up and scare the bastard off?"
The red headed vixen hmmed for a moment as she mentally surveyed the damages to Naruto's skull. "It could work, but it's going to hurt after you get done with it."
"Doesn't matter." He growled. "I just need to spook the bastard off until we can get reinforcements."
"Very well." She motioned him over to her where she laid one of her delicate hands on his head. "This may sting a bit." A red vapor like chakra formed in her hand, before it flowed into Naruto. It started as a pinching pain but then grew to a ragged clawing at the boy's skin as he let out a strangled
Naruto's eyes snapped open in the real world, a growl of pain and anger erupting from his chest. His eyes fell on his teammate Sasuke who was twitching in pain at the snake Sanin's feet, a dark tri of marks forming on his neck in the shape of three tomoe.
'Dammit, he marked Sasuke!' Naruto growled in fury, releasing some of his killing intent the Sanin's way.
Orochimaru glanced over at Naruto for a moment in curiosity. "Ahh, I see, so that's who you are." He mused abashedly. "I always wondered who they stuck the Kyubi into and here's living proof." He chuckled evilly as he watched a rich red chakra erupt from Naruto's body, his fox ears and tail erupting out of his clothing as the ethereal chakra formed around the appendages. "Kabuto-kun said that you had a sensory bloodline, but I never expected it to be something like this, truly you are an impressive little mon-" whatever else he was going to say was lost on the Sanin as several dozen spears of electricity dug into the tree where he was standing, separating him from Sasuke by a wall of jagged lightning.
Creating a clone, Naruto had it retrieve Sasuke as he faced Orochimaru down. To his credit the snake Sanin at least had the mind not to watch as the clone gathered his creators teammate.
Instead the traitor kept his slitted yellow eyes on his opponents slitted red ones. As soon as the two cleared the field and the lighting spears dissipated the two titans of jutsu clashed, Orochimaru with his skill and knowledge and Naruto with his raw chakra density and power.
On the sidelines Naruto's clone found Sakura huddled around the side of a tree nursing a wound on her leg. She looked up quickly expecting the Snake was coming after her, especially with the dense killing intent nearby, but she relaxed slightly when she saw that it was Naruto carrying Sasuke's unconscious body.
"Will he be alright?" she asked the clone quietly.
"Yeah." The clone answered. "That bastard Orochimaru just gave him a cursed seal, the boss'll seal it up tight after he get's done wiping the floor with the bastards sorry ass."
"You're a clone?" She then glanced around the tree to catch a glimpse of the two terrors clashing farther away in the forest, She caught a glimpse of Naruto, sheathed in a deep maroon cloak of chakra, with his tail and ears extended out further than normal by said chakra.
"Yeah, boss had to call on Kyubi for help." he replied absently, before what he said seemed to truly register He stiffened and sent a glance Sakura's way but was confused when he saw how casually she was handling it.
"I already knew, at least somewhat." She replied to the clones look. "Sasuke talked to me about it on the way here to the forest. It doesn't take a genius to put two and two together Naruto."
The clone chuckled. "Then you must have come up with it rather easily since you're a genius after all." before a serious look crossed his face as he watched the battle between his creator and the Snake Sanin, committing to memory all the bastards moves used, so he could analyze his jutsu and styles used, maybe figure out how to add them to his arsenal later.
A blush crossed Sakura's face at the clones praise, remembering quite clearly how Naruto had explained that his clones were basically an extension of himself, anything they said or did would be what he would say or do if he were in their place. And knowing that her teammate valued her intelligence like he did made the girls heart flutter slightly, she had been rather withdrawn from everyone since the mission to wave, but somehow, someway the blonde idiot that was her teammate was worming his way into her heart. The girl didn't have time to think over these feelings as a large explosion rocked the surrounding tree's.
"Kukukuku, not bad Naruto-kun, I daresay you have more potential than Sasuke-kun, maybe I should mark you as well?" The Sanin's tongue crossed his lips as he damn near salivated at the blonde in front of him. This boy would make the perfect vessel for him, with the boy's complete elemental affinity and Sasuke's Sharingan eyes, he would be unstoppable. The mere fact that the boy seemed adamant to stay within his own body did nothing to discourage the traitor, not even when he stared throwing low ranked offensive jutsu of every element the Sanin's way. Several shards of ice and stone stuck from the trees around him, there were also several smoking holes in those tree's where an errant lava or fire release had burned away the bark, also quite apparent were the disintegrated and rotten pieces of tree that had succumbed to his lightning or boil release techniques, missing the Sanin completely of course. Hell, not even the grasping branches and clawing limbs from Naruto's wood release had stopped the Sanin's mad grin as he forced his quarry back on his heels.
"I think it's time this little game came to an end Naruto-kun. We both have places to be, people to kill." Orochimaru's face grew predatory.
"Bring it snakeface." Naruto growled, slipping into a kenjutsu stance, his blade and body thrumming with all five elements, bringing him close if not up to par with a Jonin in raw power and speed.
Oroichmaru grinned, rushing forward with his Kusanagi drawn, clashing against Naruto's element enhanced ninjato, unleashing a shockwave of power that threatened to overtake everything in the area.
'This power is incredible.' Orochimaru practically panted in excitement. He was going to mark this boy as his next physical vessel and the Uchiha boy would his new eyes, just the thought sent shivers of sick pleasure up the snake's spine. All he needed was an opening to get a bite in, just one opening that he could exploit.
That moment soon came when Naruto flinched in pain as Kyubi's chakra started to take its toll on him. He had spent the past 10 minutes throwing biju powered jutsu at Orochimaru and it was starting to drain his own reserves and allowing the corruptive powers of Kyu's chakra to eat away at his body. He knew he was finished the moment Orochimaru flew through several handseals, his neck elongating and shooting through the half dozen feet between them to latch his fangs into the blonde's neck.
"Gahh." Naruto gasp, already feeling the dark, corrupting chakra enter his system. 'KYU! Drop what you're doing and memorize whatever the hell snake fuck is pumping into me, you know as much about seals as I do so try and memorize how the curse mark sets itself in.' He would have said more but pain overwhelmed him as Orochimaru's mark started to burn and force him to his knees. He was glad to feel more than hear the fox woman's nod that she would do so. Naruto was done for the fight that was apparent, but he wasn't done getting his final licks in that's for damn sure. With a final rush of energy the genin grabbed Orochimaru's neck in a vice like grip using what little of Kyubi's chakra he had left, then with a roar of defiance he brought his ninjato up and through the traitors neck, severing the thing from the bastards body. Naruto however didn't think for one moment that he had killed the man, reaching up he grabbed the bastards head and tore it from his neck, tossing the thing over towards his body. Naruto glanced at his shoulder where a fair portion on the pain was coming from to see the three tell tale tomoe marks on his flesh. 'You got this shit memorized Kyu?'
"Yes Naruto-kun. This is a very nasty seal and I can already feel it trying to corrupt your chakra. I've sent my chakra to the area to limit it's movement for now and give you some breathing room, but you'll need to rest soon."
'Got it' Naruto attention was brought back to Orochimaru's supposed corpse as the thing seemed to shake and stretch for a moment before, in a spray of juices and gore, another Orochimaru seemed to rip itself out of the throat of his body, to the shock and disgust of the one's watching
"That was a nice try Naruto-kun." The man clapped slightly, on the outside full of bravado and self assurance, but on the inside he was silently thanking whatever gods were looking out for him since the boy had come awfully close to killing him at that moment of weakness. A crooked smile crossed his fac. A moment of weakness now gone and the boy was on his knees at his feet, where he should be until the Snake Sanin could eventually swap bodies with the boy.
"Well, I think it's about time I made my exit." The man backed up against the tree behind him. "Till next we meet Naruto-kun." The man seemed to fuse with the tree until his form disappeared completely from view.
'Fucking bastard.' Naruto grunted, still in an abnormal amount of pain as he made his way to his teammates. Once there he received a very teary hug from Sakura, who had witness him getting bit on the neck and thought the worst.
"Don't scare me like that you baka!" She cried into his torn shirt as the boy patted her on the back, to be perfectly honest he was really out of his element at that moment.
"Sorry to interrupt boss, but I think it's time we get the hell out of here, those explosions were bound to bring some of the more ballsy teams in and I for one don't want to stick around here for longer than I have to." His clone had already picked up Sasuke and had him over one shoulder like a sack of potatoes.
"Yeah." Naruto agreed leaning on Sakura for support. "I'm nearly out of chakra and as soon as that happens this fucking seal is going to drop me, we need a place to hide and rest for now."
His clone and teammate nodded and took off toward the tower, it only took them a few minutes to find a defensible position to camp out; A giant hollowed tree with the front covered by a bit of shrubbery to camouflage it a bit.
"Ok, this'll have to do." Naruto grunted, raising a single hand to Sasuke's neck. 'Kyu, juice me enough to place a seal on dumbass here. It doesn't have to be much.'
"One moment...ok there." Naruto felt a small surge of energy in his body, along with the burning it was causing.
With a grunt of effort the Blonde genin formed a few handsign's and placed his hand on the cursed mark. The mark began to glow slightly before it was encircled by a moderately simple seal that Naruto had seen in one of his study books. It was an Evil Sealing technique that sealed off corrupt chakra. With the last of the light dying down a single, simple circle was placed around the mark, sealing it off from the rest of Sasuke's body. "There, that'll have to hold." His world began to swim, eyes crossing in dizziness. "Nighty night." Before he fell face first to the ground.
Sakura who had watched the scene for a moment looked on in worry as her two teammates lay unconscious in her care, it really, really didn't fill her with determination like either of the two idiots would have claimed. No, right now she was feeling cold, alone and... Her attention drew to Naruto's face, even in unconsciousness he had a serious look on his face, like he was doing something of great importance, even while asleep.
Seeing her teammates resolve helped the girl find her own. With a grunt of effort, still favoring one leg as the injury from earlier had yet to set. The girl went about work setting up some traps, quite a few of them taught to her by Naruto himself.
Siting back in the cave like tree, the girl stared out over the clearing outside the tree. Her teammates needed her so she would guard them with her life. She looked down at the kunai clutched in her hands, thoughts going back to the man she had killed.
Yes, she had already killed, this was no different.
She'd protect her friends, or die trying.
-ooo-
UGH, finally finished with this bruiser. Standing at an impressive 9000 odd words, this is a pretty long entry so I hope you guys enjoy it.
Real quick question, Naruto gets the Sharingan, yea or nay? I have an idea on how this will work and I'm just wanting some ideas, should I give him the Sharingan or not?
Also I'd like some opinions on the Orochimaru fight in this chapter, good? Bad? Meh?
Daihyōbakuha - Great Ice Explosion