"I'm going away this weekend, remember?" Prim shouts calls unnecessarily from her room as I fold my bed back into the couch. It's Friday afternoon and I'm already home early from work, the shift having ended surprisingly early with my boss telling me I'd get full pay anyways.
To say I am a little excited about the free time is an understatement.
The last two days have been a blur. Since coming home from Peeta's the other morning, I feel like I've been floating through my days. Prim hadn't let my return go without notice – like a dog with a bone she'd hopped on the question wagon before my key had even slid into the lock.
I've told her almost everything, the action from me so unlike anything she's ever witnessed. She'd been so surprised - I've never been one for talking about these things growing up - but now, well, now it was as though Peeta was all I could think about. The best part was when Prim didn't continue her questioning – she was satisfied with what I'd given her and didn't bother to press me further.
It seems like finally things are getting better since coming back from school, like maybe life is going to be smoother than expected.
At least until Prim's words seemed to put a haze on that feeling the moment they registered in my brain. What the hell was is she talking about?
"You're what?" I question, finding myself at her doorway looking into the small room.
"I'm going away, for the education retreat. I told you about it like a month ago, Katniss, and yesterday morning… come on," Prim replies as she examines two shirts from her closet. Taking one, she rolls it up and places it in her small suitcase and looks up at me expectantly. "You really don't remember? Okay. Well," she huffs out a breath and digs through her purse, pulling out things and messing up her once tidy bed. "Here's the paperwork with all the information. I've written down the phone number for you on the fridge and I have the alarms all set on my phone to remember to take my meds every day. Do you remember now?"
Reading over it quickly, I try to digest that Prim is leaving the city to spend a weekend with Finnick, and Annie and a few other recruits from the centre to work towards their counselling certifications. The memory is vague but sure enough, Prim had told me about it just the day before when I was running to change my clothes before heading off to my second job. Sucking in a breath, I forgive my sister for her snap remarks and let the annoyance go.
"Is this what Annie was telling me about?" I ask as Prim picks up her bag and walks out to the living room. I remember Annie telling informing me that Prim was going to get a job at the centre but I hadn't probed for more information then, still lost in my own issues. Now it was starting to make sense and I couldn't help but worry. Now the trip is starting to make more sense.
More sense that causes my worry to break into the fog of happiness that has been surrounding me for the last few days. The worries crowded in like sand filling a hole, finding every nook and cranny available in my mind and sneaking back into my consciousness.
What if she got sick while she was away? Or the stress of the material freaked her out? What if she failed or something went wrong? I was sinking fast, my mood plummeting as I began to think about everything that could go wrong with this trip.
"Get that look off your face, sister," Prim scolds, pulling the papers out of my hands and stuffing them back in her purse. I move to face her, my arms resting over my chest as I try to force myself to relax.
"I'm just..." I hesitate, knowing full well that the thoughts in my head are crazy ones to most people.
"Katniss, I know. Don't worry. I'll be back Sunday night though, alright? And if anything goes wrong, I'm with people from Posi+ive and I'm pretty sure they're going to know what to do. Enjoy your weekend for once, sleep in my bed! Or-" Her excited rambles are interrupted by a heavy knock at the door followed by Finnick stumbling through the entrance way.
"Woah, still need to get that fixed, I see," he crows referring to the heavy stick of the door that got him the last time he was here.
"Hey Finn, tell Katniss here you're not going to let me die this weekend?" Prim greets happily and grabs her bag again before heading towards the door.
"Well, she won't die. But I can't promise no broken bones. How good are you at hiking, Prim?"
I turn to Finnick with surprise and fear riddled through me, the shock likely evident on my face as they both break out into raucous laughter causing Finnick to starts to coughing and sputtering from the effort.
"She's going to be fine, Katniss. Relax, have a good weekend, call Peet," he suggests with a smooth wink before disappearing out the door behind Prim.
In a rush, I feel the quiet settle in around me and it takes a second before it really clicks. I have the apartment to myself. I'm alone. The worries from a moment before return to the place that they hide in my mind and I pull in a deep breath, relaxing into the feel of the quiet.
I don't even have to go into work until eleven tomorrow.
I could cry with how excited I am, looking around me and taking in the moment. Feeling my shoulders relax and feeling my mind begin to clear, I let out a deep breath and laugh giddily before turning back to the couch and falling onto its cushioned surface.
"Quiet. So quiet,." I mumble to myself and grab for a blanket. I'm halfway across the cushions when my phone begins to ring, the shrill buzz of it cracking into my mood. "Hello?" I groan onto the line.
"Hello to you too, sweetheart. Look, this isn't a social call. Can you come in to the centre? Meet me in about thirty minutes? I have some news," Haymitch states clearly, the often familiar husk of alcohol gone from his voice.
The nerves that have just left me come rushing back, my fears about being denied coverage or looming additional bills flashing behind my eyes.
"Yeah, I can do that. Um, do I need anything?" I ask getting up and making my way over to my purse. I know if I'm going to get there in thirty minutes I'll need to go now, if not ten minutes ago.
"Just you. See you soon." The line clicks dead and all I can hear as I slide my phone into my pocket is the beat of my heart in my chest. Without thinking twice, I hurry to get my bag together and head out the door, quick-timing my steps down the roads.
I end up nearly tripping through the front door of the centre as I rush to get there. I'm sure I look a mess, the fresh sweat on my brow reminding me of the impending hot weather that will come this summer.
"Katniss?" Peeta greets with surprise from behind the front desk. I shoot him a tense smile and point to my watch before disappearing down the hallway to Haymitch's office. I'd feel guilty about practically barging on by Peeta, but I can't help my need for answers now.
"A little late, sweetheart," Haymitch grumbles from behind his desk as I poke my head through his doorway.
"Sorry, I was at home and – "
"We got it, kid." Haymitch interrupts me abruptly, a rare small smile making his features really stand out. In that moment he looks like someone who turned heads before he fell into the bottle, someone strong and beautiful who got lost in his sadness.
"Got what?" I inquire when he doesn't continue, my nerves ebbing slightly. Pulling the door shut behind me for privacy, I sit heavily in his guest chair and grip my fingers together.
"Some funding. Enough, at least, to cover rent, prescriptions and some of the basics in terms of prescriptions and medical coverage. They're also interested in reviewing your situation for a rent controlled unit but that's still a ways off yet. It's through a well-established charity so it should be pretty stable but I'd recommend working on building up that savings again just in case. Payments will come in monthly direct deposits to a joint account – you'll need to set that up with Prim – at the end of every month. The conditions are though that continued efforts are to be made to use this opportunity for Prim to return to school. I talked to them today and they approved this funding based on the case information provided – "
"Case information? I just filled out forms – " I interject, the whole overwhelming meaning of what he's saying starting to get through my ringing ears.
"The centre put it together. Every month we submit new cases to various groups in hopes of getting more funding for those that come through our door. You signed the release of information – " Haymitch starts to dig through the papers on his desk before I put my hand down over them in a snap.
"Never mind that. What? Haymitch – are you just joking with me here or...?" I ask, my voice a mere whisper. The man shakes his head and withdraws his hand carefully.
"You're actually getting some real, no bullshit, financial support here Katniss. Somebody out there wants you and Prim to have a fair chance. I'm not kidding you," he states evenly and I know that if I were standing I'd be currently on the ground.
"What?!" I shout excitedly, the sound rattling the window of his office.
It feels so surreal, so not like something that would ever happen. I don't have to worry about paying for medications? Or medical coverage? That's... That's almost all of my entire monthly budget. I don't have to pay for that anymore?
"Hey – is everything - ?" Peeta interrupts, swinging the door open with a burst and looking towards myself and then Haymitch. I give him a smile that nearly breaks my face in half and nod slowly. Inside my excitement feels like fireworks, my mood in the clouds.
I can't wait to tell Prim.
I can't wait. This is what we needed. This would will get us through. This... Kindness.
"Is this real?" I ask Haymitch once more, my mind just needing that list bit of confirmation.
"Do you need a drink to seal it?" He replies back, reaching for his flask and holding it out to me.
"Oh my god." Shaking my head at his offer I look back up towards Peeta, the words hanging on my tongue. "Prim and I, we're going to be okay, Peeta."
Choking on my words as I try to explain what Haymitch has told me, I feel the tears of relief, of excitement and overwhelming happiness, slip down my cheeks and I smile. Peeta seems to understand the size of what I'm saying as he joins me in a strong hug, his arms nearly stopping the breath in my lungs as he pulls me towards him.
The celebrations seem to carry me through the next hour as Haymitch begins to explain the process that our application went through and how the money will now be addressed. As he gets into the details of our application, the depth of the things included nearly brings me to tears.
Since coming to Posi+ive, Prim's and my participation in the centre's activities and different education sessions largely contributed to our application which was managed through Effie's office. The application, which is signed off on by at least three members of the centre's board, includes not only our financial status and formal information; it also includes profiles on us and how we're adjusting to the diagnosis and the future outlook.
"The feedback was very positive about Prim's desire to attend medical school and work here, but they were, to use Effie's words, 'absolutely enthralled' by you, Katniss. Seems you made an impression without even trying,." Haymitch finishes, snapping the document closed and sliding it across the table towards me and now Peeta who sits next to me with my hand clasped in his.
"I didn't even realize," I murmur aloud, the excitement from before ebbing into a true feeling of the weight of the world being lifted from my shoulders.
"It's because you don't understand the effect you can have." I turn to Peeta and pull him close to me again, his words causing warmth to run through me. When I turn back, the strange look from the night of 'Safe Booty' is back on Haymitch's face, his eyes judging me though they're now coupled with a look of confusion.
I force myself to dismiss it and get to my feet quickly. It's time to celebrate for real.
"Thanks Haymitch, for everything," I say before turning to Peeta. "Lunch?"
"I can't – " Peeta adds before pressing his lips back to my neck, his body holding mine against the stairwell wall in front of my apartment building.
Our dinner lunch had been short and sweet, my excitement filling me with confidence and a contentment that I hadn't known was possible. The walk back to my apartment had only built the feelings within me and by the time I turned to Peeta to say goodbye, expecting him to want to go home, I was flying so high I barely had a moment to breathe before he was capturing my lips with his.
He didn't want to go home at all.
Instead we'd gotten lost in each other until a passing car had honked to interrupt our very rather public make out session.
Laughing, I invited Peeta up to the very empty apartment to spend the night but we were once again stalled, our bodies more interested in one another than getting to privacy.
"Can't what?" I whispered in between the heavy breaths that escaped my lungs. The feel of his body against mine was is making my blood boil, and the simple act of breathing hard to handle.
"I can't get past the effect you have on me Ms Everdeen."
Running my fingers through his hair, I pull him back until I can meet his eyes and give him a small smile.
"Let's get upstairs while we still can, okay?" The laughter bursts out of us both and we hustle ourselves up the stairs two at a time.
With my key still in the door and our arms tangled together, Peeta and I stumble our way through the entry until my back hits the dining table and a shocked shout rings out.
"Oh fuck." The familiar voice makes the blood that was a moment before humming, rise to my cheeks as I tuck my face against Peeta's collar, desperate to hide from everything.
"Hey, uh, Gale... Jo..." Peeta stutters, his hands squeezing and releasing on my hips. "What are you – "
"Fashioning a better room setup for the Everdeens as a surprise. But I can definitely see this is uh, a um, bad time," Gale replies. Behind me I can hear his voice rise an octave higher than normal, his apparent discomfort at my situation noticeable.
"Thanks Gale," I mumble from where I've still got my face hidden from them. To say I'm a little surprised to see them here, in our apartment, is an understatement but definitely not something uncommon. Growing up, Gale had always seemed to find his way into our place, crawling through windows or picking the lock. Now though I know it must have been Prim to give him a key, their friendship still strong while Gale and I still struggle to get back to the friendship we used to know.
"Oh, grow a pair," Johanna laughs and to my surprise she tugs me away from Peeta and pulls me into a tight hug. "Look at what we did!" She instructs when she pulls back. Turning, I take in the room around me and the fake wall that they've fashioned to make the living room smaller and almost into a second bedroom. "Annie told me you need some space or you were are going to go crazy so Gale and I here, well, we built this for Prim."
I look at her in confusion.
"You get the room, Catnip," Gale fills in the blank and my mouth drops open.
"You guys built us a second bedroom?" I ask quietly, surprise awestruck at the second gift I've received in the last few hours.
I look around me some more and take in the hallway to the bedroom and bathroom, now extended out to encompass the pull-out couch that I sleep on to create a second room with a door near the kitchen. On the other side, the 'living room' is now a small space just big enough for a TV and maybe some small chairs for Prim and I. I'm in awe by the small change that has made a huge difference to the space, giving the privacy that was needed for the second room and keeping a little bit of extra space for us to relax in.
"Yep. I learned a few things growing up about construction and I needed a lifter so here we are. It's not much, but we like a less crazy version of Katniss. So, surprise?" Johanna says and steps back to slide up next to Gale. The image of them together, of Gale's large body towering over Johanna's as she tucks herself next to his side, makes me happy and I step towards them and pull them into a tight hug so uncharacteristic of me.
"Thank you. So much,." I whisper loudly. I stay like that this for another second longer before I feel Peeta's hand on my shoulder.
"It looks great," Peeta adds as I step back and brush my palms against my face trying to force away the tears.
"We were, uh, just out celebrating," I start to explain and the happiness seems to take over me and the tears rush out with the laughter that escapes from me.
"Katniss and Prim got a Smith Grant," Peeta finishes for me. I see Johanna's face drop in surprise, her recognition apparent.
"So you don't even need this anymore, moneybags!" Johanna shouts groans and throws her hands up in exasperation.
"No, no! We do. At least until we qualify for rent control we can catch up on everything. But this is amazing, really," I finish and lean back into Peeta's arms. The intimacy of the move, of our closeness, seems to set Gale on edge as he steps back and looks around awkwardly, not meeting my gaze. I see the familiar unease in his features, so similar to how I'd acted the first time I'd realized him and Johanna were getting close, and I tuck it away to hopefully talk to him about it sometime.
"We should um, get going, give them some privacy, you know?" Gale says a second later to Johanna.
"Oh! Hell, yes!" Johanna shouts in response as though she had forgotten how we'd stumbled in the apartment earlier. "Okay kiddies, we're out. We setup all Prim's stuff in here now so feel free to christen your new room, if you know what I'm saying," she laughs and winks with exaggeration before grabbing her purse.
Together Peeta and I watch as they gather up their her tools and step towards the door, Johanna's arm wrapping around Gale's before he pulls open the door.
"Katniss! Almost forgot!" Johanna turns when Gale steps into the hallway. I step forward curiously and meet her halfway before she holds out a tin towards me, her eyes hard as they meet mine, seriousness clouding her features. "This is for you. I've got more at home so don't worry about giving it back." She pulls my hand up and places a thin worn tin in my palm before folding my fingers around it. "Stay safe."
Without another word, Johanna slips out the door and pulls it closed forcefully, overcoming the stick, behind her leaving me to stare at the case tin in my palm and wonder if what I'm thinking is real or not.
"I'll get us something to drink," Peeta says, breaking into the silence. I let him wander into the kitchen before I move towards my room- my room? - and open the tin in the new privacy I have. Inside it are a variety of condoms, the packages in every colour, size and style. I feel my face flame both from embarrassment and perhaps a little bit of nervousness. "What is it?" Peeta asks from behind me, surprising me until so that I jump and spill the condoms on the edge of the bed.
I freeze, looking down at the packages and then up at Peeta.
"Oh," he mutters. I can see his knuckles go white as they squeeze against the glasses of water he holds in each hand. "Guess we should talk, eh?"
EDIT: Oh god - I don't know what happened with the document but it should be cleaned up now. So sorry.
AN: Can I just remind you all how amazing my beta is? Seriously, I could not do this without her and I value every second she throws into this story making it fuller and more enjoyable. Plus she's dope with tenses. Love ya'll (ps. if there's problems it's because I have a new computer without Word so I'm migrating everything to Google Docs and it's... interesting.)