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In which Shizuo Acquaints Himself with Technology, Izaya has Broken Ribs and Grocery Lists are Long Lived
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The Monster of Ikebukuro was in his debt, and so Izaya thought it must be the irony in the world that there was little he could make Heiwajima Shizuo actually do.
He couldn't make Shizuo wash his clothes, for he didn't want his clothes ruined by the monster's touch.
He could make Shizuo cook, but he had already done that and his cooking was actually good.
He couldn't make Shizuo clean the bookshelves, because he might discover Celty's head.
He was tempted to make Shizuo clean the house, but he didn't want to risk Shizuo cleaning the bookshelves as well when Izaya was not paying attention and discovering Celty's head.
The only thing he could actually do was get Shizuo to go grocery shopping which he had already done. For he sure as hell couldn't make Shizuo deliver his information for him, he didn't want to lose clients because they feared Ikebukuro's Monster. Although it would be amusing to see the monster doing his, as he said, 'dirty work' for him.
Izaya sneezed. Shizuo was out getting the groceries, so he was alone in the apartment, since Namie had declared her own day off.
Well, at least getting the groceries was sure to piss the monster off. Especially when he realized Izaya had sent him all over Shinjuku to get groceries from different department stories when he could have just gotten everything on the list at the supermarket near Shinjuku station.
Izaya looked at the time on his computer. Shizuo had been out for almost an hour.
Perhaps Shizuo had indeed realized and was pissed off.
Izaya smiled happily at the thought. He sent the email to a client, then turned to his other computer.
Tanaka Taro
Kanra-san?
Kanra
Sorry sorry, I was a little busy with something~
Saika
Are you alright, Kanra-san?
Tanaka Taro
Yeah, you seem a little distracted.
Kanra
Awww, are you worried about me, my lovelies? Don't worry, I'm fine ( ^ー^ ) ~
Setton-san has just joined the chat.
Setton
Good afternoon, everyone!
Tanaka Taro
Good afternoon, Setton-san!
Saika
Good afternoon.
Kanra
Good afternoon Setton-san! You're surprisingly late today. ( ﾟoﾟ)
Setton
Ah, I had an errand to run….
Setton
So….what were you guys talking about?
Tanaka Taro
Nothing much really….although I saw something shocking yesterday.
Saika
Are you talking about that?
Tanaka Taro
Yeah….If he was still here with us he would be pretty shocked too.
Kanra
Eh? What are you two talking about? Tell me, tell me! Or are you keeping secrets from me? I'm hurt kyaaaa!ヽ(*≧ω≦)ﾉ
Tanaka Taro
It isn't anything big – well I suppose it's big, but it's not life-threatening I think….?
Kanra
Mou! Taro-kun, you're so mean to leave us in suspense! ヽ( ｀Д´)ﾉ
Setton
What is it?
Saika
….Orihara Izaya.
Setton
Orihara Izaya?!
Tanaka Taro
And Heiwajima Shizuo. I saw them together yesterday, actually. And they weren't being violent, so it was really surprising.
Setton
A-Ah I saw that too, oh I remember I also saw something surprising yesterday! I mean, not about Izaya and Shizuo.
Kanra
Ehhhhh? What did Setton-san see~?
Setton
Foreigners…badly beaten up. I was just walking along, and I heard some voices. I went to investigate, and there were two guys who said they pissed off the man in a bartender suit. It's a good thing I was there, since I don't think they knew the hospital number for Japan.
Kanra
Wahhhh, how dangerous! Setton-san has such a kind heart, lending a helping hand to strangers! (ﾉ≧∀≦)ﾉ
Kanra
But it could be dangerous, you know.
Setton
Uhhh…not really. I just pitied them. A-Anyway I'm pretty strong, and they were injured, so I thought it would be okay! Hahaha.
Kanra
As expected of Setton-san!
Tanaka Taro
Foreigners huh? Why would they piss off Heiwajima-san though? But it sounds interesting. I wish I could have seen it. Maybe those foreigners were assassins of some sort?
Setton
I-Impossible! Why would assassins want to kill Heiwajima Shizuo? I heard his enemies are mainly gang members.
Tanaka Taro
I don't know, maybe he was protecting someone? But yeah, that guy's really strong! I pity those men who crossed him.
Saika
Strong….love…..
Tanaka Taro
Eh?
Saika
It's nothing.
Kanra
Tanaka Taro-kun sure has a vivid imagination! Maybe in an anime or manga they would be assassins, but I think they were just innocent men who accidentally pissed off the Monster of Ikebukuro! I mean, if they were assassins wouldn't they have hurt Setton-san?! (((╹д╹;)))
Tanaka Taro
Ahhhh…yes that's true. Lol I guess I'm imagining too much!
Footsteps sounded, and Shizuo's voice called out casually.
"I'm back."
"Welcome home."
"….."
Kanra
asduhfeonslaokkjuiojoslpa
Tanaka Taro
K-Kanra-san?!
Shizuo's lips curled into an amused grin at Izaya who had opened his mouth, closed it, opened it, then closed it again then finally turned away as if he hadn't said anything at all.
Setton
Did something happen?
Kanra
Nothing. Nothing at all
Kanra
Liar
Saika
?
Tanaka Taro
I-Is everything okay?
Kanra
Yeah everything's fine rruejojek
"O-OW! Shizu-chan!"
"Stay on the floor for a while flea."
"W-Wait! Wait what are you –"
Kanra
So this is what you do in your free time.
Tanaka Taro
Um…who are you? Are you Kanra-san's friend?
Saika
…Are you bullying her?
"….Her?"
"Shut up and get off my seat!"
"Nah I don't want to. This is fun."
"You -!"
Kanra
Nah, I'm just having fun, like she always does.
Kanra
She's abnormally cute today, so I like to tease her.
"SHIZU-CHAN!"
"What? I'm helping you to build up your feminine image, you feminine flea."
Izaya struggled against the foot pressed down onto his chest as Shizuo sent him a taunting grin. His eyes flashed angrily.
"I'm going to kill you!"
"Maybe I should join this chatroom as your boyfriend, what do you think Kanra-chan?"
"GO DIE! AND GET YOUR MONSTER FOOT OFF ME DAMN IT!"
Saika
Ah I see….
Setton
Ah, could you be her boyfriend?
"Oh, great minds think alike."
Shizuo said, unaware that he was referring to not himself and a stranger but himself and Celty.
"Shizuo," Izaya forced his body up against the monster's foot, "If you say yes I swear I'll make your life hell!"
Shizuo looked at Izaya, considered the raging emotions in the furious flea's eyes, then shrugged and returned to the computer screen.
While making sure to keep his foot to hold Izaya down of course.
Revenge was sweet.
Which was why he liked it.
Kanra
Nah.
"Shizuo!"
"So this is all it takes to make you call me by my name? And not that stupid nickname. Someone's off his groove today huh Izaya-kun?"
"And relax, I didn't do it. So stop looking at me like you want to kill me – that's my job."
Tanaka Taro
Right…um what should we call you boyfr- I mean, not-boyfriend-san?
Kanra
Shizu
"You idiot protozoan! Not your real name!"
Setton
S-Shizu?
Kanra
I meant, it's sure quiet nowadays. Ikebukuro I mean. Oh and you can call me Heiwa. I like that it's quiet, 'cause I like peace.
"…So even Shizu-chan can lie, huh?"
"It's not a lie, shitty flea. I do like peace."
"Hard to believe. And what a pity, I was looking forward to you saying your name was 'Shizuka'."
"Tch you're the only one crossing gender here damn flea."
"Whatever, you realize Heiwa is also part of your name?"
"So? Heiwa also means peace and thanks to you, no one will believe Heiwajima Shizuo likes peace."
"Good point." Izaya smirked in satisfaction to see Shizuo annoyed. He wriggled on the floor.
"Now if you would be so kind as to get your monster foot off me? You're going to crack my ribs – actually I'm surprised they're not broken yet."
Setton
A-Ah Heiwa huh?
"…Oi."
"What?"
"How does this guy know about yesterday?"
"Yesterday? This guy – you mean Tanaka Taro-kun? Well who doesn't know? With the way your drunk self was carrying me around –"
"No not that, about the assassins thing. And how does he know I was protecting you?"
"…..Intuition I guess," Izaya looked away at the word he refused to acknowledge, "He's Mikado-kun."
"Mikado?"
"Ryuugamine."
"Ryuu…..?"
"The kid. The leader of the Dollars."
"Ah." Shizuo said in sudden realization. "Ryuugasaki you mean?"
"…It's Ryuugamine, Shizu-chan. Ryuugamine, like the air conditioner."
"So Ryuugamine's the leader of the Dollars?"
"Yes yes."
"Oh, what a coincidence, then I did tell the leader of the Dollars I quit after all – argh I still can't forgive them for kidnapping those women – I fucking hate cowardly guys like THAT, I SHOULD JUST KILL –"
"Owwww- OW OW OW! SHIZU-CHAN IT HURTS!"
"…Huh? Oh sorry." Shizuo said, not realizing he had pushed his foot down onto Izaya's chest in his anger. The flea whimpered pathetically and in pity for the creature, he removed his foot.
"You alive?"
"Ugh…..I think my ribs are really broken now….."
Setton
Heiwa-san?
Kanra
Sorry, I was a little busy. Come to think of it, you seem familiar.
Setton
Eh? Me?
"Wait." Shizuo said, suddenly realizing something, "Why are you here in the first place?"
"What nonsense are you speaking now? This is my home and that is my computer, so if you would –"
"No I meant – in this chatroom. This is the Dollars chatroom right – so why are you here?"
"Why else? I'm a member of the Dollars of course."
"HAHHHHH?!"
The blond slammed his fists onto the table, producing a cracking sound.
"YOU MEAN I WAS IN THE SAME ORGANIZATION AS YOU?!"
Izaya smirked. "Yes, yes." He said leisurely, wincing as he got off the floor. "We were in the same gang, isn't that nice? Now for the last time – UGH!"
"HOW DARE YOU?! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
"While I'm happy to see Shizu-chan angry again….Don't you think it's a little immature for someone your age to beat someone up just because you don't like that they're in the same group as you? This isn't elementary school…..Shizu-chan."
"…!"
"Oh and in case your protozoic brain has forgotten, which is very likely, you're still in my debt. And Setton-san is waiting for your reply over there, you wouldn't want to make a stranger wait, would you?"
"…..TCH!"
Shizuo released Izaya roughly and then stomped back to the swivel chair, sitting down and glaring at the computer screen.
"Good thing I quitted that gang – argh if Simon invited me knowing the shitty flea was in Dollars too I'm definitely going to KILL HIM! THAT CRAFTY BASTARD!"
Izaya smirked as Shizuo's anger was for once not directed to him, and directed to Simon instead. For once, he didn't mind, since Simon had caused him public, immensely unnecessary embarrassment yesterday by getting the monster drunk.
Though, he had also saved his life. As loathe as he was to admit it.
Izaya winced slightly at the pain when he inhaled, as monsters showed no mercy, even if they were in debt.
Well, monsters would always be monsters after all.
Kanra
Sorry for the wait, flea was pissing me off
Setton
F-Flea?
"…Shit."
"Ooooh, Shizu-chan slipped up~"
"Shut up!"
Kanra
There's this really annoying flea in my home hopping around and pissing me off. It refuses to die no matter what so it's really annoying.
"Technically Shizu-chan, this is my home."
"Whatever. You're the one who said 'Welcome home'."
"….."
Izaya shut his mouth at that, much to Shizuo's relief. He still didn't know why the flea had said 'Welcome home', but it amused him since the flea himself didn't know why he had said it. And he was amused at the flea who didn't know why he had said what he had said.
Shizuo grinned, feeling in a little better mood as the flea seemed to be annoyed at himself again.
[Private Mode] Setton
Excuse me
[Private Mode] Setton
Shizuo?
[Private Mode] Setton
Are you Shizuo?
Kanra
Who are you?
Tanaka Taro
?
Kanra
…Sorry, wrong window
"Hey flea, how do I change windows?"
"Huh?"
"This Setton guy knows who I am. Who the hell is he?! How do I speak to him alone?"
"…As expected, Shizu-chan is hopeless."
Had they had a better relationship, Izaya's tone could be considered fond, as he reached for the mouse and Shizuo leaned away to make way.
"There. Who do you think Setton-san is?"
"How would I know? I'll just ask the guy. Though his name looks familiar somehow…."
"It should."
Izaya said, smiling for a reason he still didn't know as he settled himself on his own desk, swinging his legs as he glanced at the screen.
[Private Mode] Kanra
Who are you?
[Private Mode] Setton
Ah, I see you didn't know how to use the private mode. You must be Shizuo. I can't believe it! What are you doing here?!
[Private Mode] Kanra
I still don't know who the hell you are so if you know I'm Heiwajima Shizuo you better fess up 'cause I sure as hell don't know you.
[Private Mode] Setton
Oh! I'm so sorry. Shizuo, it's me. Celty.
"C-Celty?!"
Izaya laughed at the dumbfounded expression on Shizuo's face.
"Maybe you shouldn't have been so rude to Setton-san, huh?"
"Be quiet, damn flea."
[Private Mode] Kanra
Celty! Sorry, I didn't know it was you, though I thought your name looked really familiar. But my memory's bad, so I couldn't find out where. Argh it's all that damn flea's fault as usual! He didn't tell me! I thought he didn't know.
"Shizu-chan always blames everything on me….!"
"Because everything is your fault! Why the hell didn't you tell me?!"
"Well, because Shizu-chan was so determined on asking the guy himself, and not the information broker sitting right here on his desk, because a monster's occupying his chair."
"….Argh."
Saika
Um, I have to leave now. It was nice meeting you, Heiwa-san.
Tanaka Taro
Me too. Also, it seems like Setton-san and Heiwa-san know each other. Hahaha.
Setton
Ah, so sorry! I was just excited, I didn't think Heiwa-san would ever use this chatroom
"…Izaya."
"Yes yes."
Kanra
Sorry, I was surprised that Setton was someone I knew too. …Kanra didn't tell me.
Tanaka Taro
Lol…Kanra-san likes to keep secrets to herself.
Kanra
Tch sure does, I know that better than anyone!
Saika
Then, I'm going.
Tanaka Taro
Me too.
Setton
See you next time!
Kanra
Yeah. Take care, you two.
Tanaka Taro
Bye Heiwa-san, Setton-san! Heiwa-san, hopefully Kanra-san will let you use her account again! Or you could join this chatroom.
Kanra
Heh. Thanks for the offer, but I'm no longer part of the Dollars.
Tanaka Taro
…..Ah I see. Still, I hope to see you again.
Kanra
Yeah, who knows we may bump into each other on the street. Something tells me you know who I am.
Tanaka Taro
Heiwa-san is certainly sharp. (ヘ。ヘ) I won't tell anyone. I'll see you around!
Kanra
Yeah.
Saika
Bye everyone.
Saika-san has just left the chat.
Tanaka Taro-san has just left the chat.
"Hey, who's Saika?"
"Sonohara Anri."
"..Who the hell's that?"
"No one you need to know."
Izaya waved off. Shizuo frowned, wondered where he had heard the name before, then shrugged and typed.
Kanra
I guess it's just us two left, huh?
Setton
Yeah, as usual （＾_＾）
"Hey flea, I'm hungry."
"No you can't eat me."
"….What?"
"Nothing."
Izaya said when Shizuo gave him a weird look, even though he had inched away slightly from the monster of Ikebukuro.
"Anyway if Shizu-chan wants to eat, Shizu-chan should stop using the chatroom so he can cook something for the both of us."
"Why do I have to cook?" Shizuo asked, frowning slightly as he typed on the keyboard, his gaze on the screen. "Let's just order takeout. Chinese sounds good."
"But I like Shizu-chan's cooking."
"Huh?"
"I said I like to make Shizu-chan cook." Izaya said smoothly, his face turned away. "For the me that Shizu-chan hates, of course. Since Shizu-chan is still in my debt."
"….Tsk."
Kanra
Hey Celty. Sorry but I'm kind of hungry and the flea is too, I'll talk to you another time okay?
Setton
Sure, Shizuo. Though I wonder why you're at Izaya's place? Actually, I didn't even know Kanra-san was Izaya in the first place! To think the girly Kanra was Izaya all along!
Kanra
Yeah I know right. Damn gender confused flea. Anyway I'll see you later – uh, how do I make a smiley face?
Setton
Haha, just click the icon Shizuo.
Kanra
Like this? （‐＾▽＾‐）
Setton
(*^▽^*)
Setton
See you! I don't know what you're doing with Izaya but try not to kill him!
Kanra
Yeah, I want to but that would be a waste.
Setton
Eh?
"Right right." Izaya took the mouse from Shizuo as he drawled.
"That's enough or this will go on forever, off to the kitchen with you Shizu-chan."
Kanra
Shizu-chan can't talk now since he's supposed to cook for me~
Setton
C-Cook for you?!
Kanra
That's right~like my personal housewife! Hahahaha!
Setton
W-What did you do to him?!
Kanra
He's repaying his debt, I didn't do anything to him. In fact he did something to me and caused me trouble, so it's only right that he repays his debt!
Kanra
Bye bye~
Setton
Wait
Kanra-san has just left the chat.
"That was rude of you flea." Shizuo frowned. "Still, I didn't know chatrooms were so addictive."
"Welcome to the Information Age, you caveman." Izaya spread his arms grandly, then drew them up and stretched.
"And someone had to be the responsible one or you'd be there chatting till my next client comes."
"…When's your next client?"
"2PM. We still have lots of time. Now shouldn't you be in the kitchen? After you put the groceries in the fridge of course."
Shizuo looked like he wanted to say something, but decided on a scoff and getting off Izaya's chair.
He picked up the bags of groceries he had put down, and shoved the grocery list into Izaya's face.
"E-Ehhhh Shizu-chan I can't see!"
"Shut up. I should suffocate you with this."
Shizuo considered this for a moment, but remembered he was still in debt. He sighed and let the grocery list go, and Izaya caught the long list in his hand.
"Wow, I'm surprised you didn't tear this to pieces." He said as he rolled the list up, an amused smirk on his face.
"If I tore it to pieces I would have to go all the way back and ask you again." Shizuo said in annoyance as he made his way across the living room. "I don't know why the hell you couldn't have just sent me a message and use my phone number which I still have no idea how the hell you got, for something useful for once."
"Well, it's because I wanted Shizu-chan to do exactly that, but I should have expected Shizu-chan to be unpredictable as usual."
"Yeah and 'forgetting' to give me money and sending me all over fucking Shinjuku - you just like to piss me off don't you?!"
"That's right." Izaya plopped down onto his chair, spreading his arms as he sat on it like a king, "Can't you hurry up Shizu-chan? I'm hungry!"
"IF YOU WANT ME TO HURRY UP THEN GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND HELP ME DAMN IT!"
"But that wouldn't be any fun at all! Ahhhhh -" Izaya smirked as he leaned back, watching Shizuo lugging the many plastic bags to the fridge. "Such a nice scenery."
I MUST NOT PUNCH HIM I MUST NOT PUNCH HIM I MUST NOT PUNCH HIM
"Seeing Shizu-chan like this, Shizu-chan is like a cute little housewife~!"
….I MUST PUNCH HIM!
"I-ZAAAAAAAAA-YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"So noisy, Shizu-chan….can't you be quieter? Like your name suggests – oh wait, I suppose you can't, since Shizu-chan is Shizu-chan after all."
Izaya sighed as if in great mock disappointment and Shizuo gritted his teeth.
"…Bastard."
He exhaled, loosened his grip on the refrigerator before he broke another door in Izaya's house, and picked up the plastic bags, placing them carefully inside the fridge.
"Shizu-chaaaan, you can't just put them in like that, you have to unpack them!"
"HELL NO! UNPACK THEM YOURSELF! I STILL HAVE TO COOK LUNCH FOR YOU! I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING MAID!"
"But I thought you were, for today! You're in my debt –"
"THAT DOESN'T MEAN I'M GOING TO DO EVERYTHING YOU SAY – NOW STOP TESTING MY FUCKING PATIENCE DAMN IT!"
Shizuo slammed the fridge door so hard Izaya was surprised it didn't break. He held a few plastic bags in his hands for ingredients for cooking. He whirled and stomped off into the kitchen, growling curses at Izaya under his breath, which made Izaya smile.
"Ahhhh….I could almost get used to this."
Just as the relaxed words left Izaya's lips, something came crashing into them.
"O-Ow! What the hell, Shizu-chan?!"
"Oh sorry," Shizuo's voice came from the kitchen, not sounding sorry at all. "Be grateful I decided to return this to you instead of using it as an ingredient for your lunch."
Izaya rubbed his bruised lip delicately, glaring at the unpredictable monster. He got off the chair to pick up the object from the floor.
"….Shizu-chan!"
"What?"
"What the hell is this?!"
"How would I know?! I found it loitering around somewhere just now! Isn't it yours?"
"Well yes it's mine, but why did you solve it?! I was in the middle of solving it!"
Izaya was so annoyed that if he had Shizuo's superhuman strength the completed cube in his hands would have shattered into pieces.
"Solve? Solve what? I didn't solve anything! I JUST PUT THE COLORS BACK TOGETHER BECAUSE THE MESS WAS FUCKING ANNOYING!"
"The mess was annoying? This is called a Rubik's Cube you protozoan and you just solved it and undid all my hard work! Putting the colors back together means solving it, idiot!"
"Rubik what? Whatever, but if the aim is to put the colors back together – what kind of aim is that anyway – anyway why the hell are you so pissed off?! I just finished your job for you! Shouldn't you be grateful?! I knew it, I SHOULD HAVE JUST COOKED IT WITH YOUR LUNCH AFTER ALL! WHETHER THE COLORS ARE TOGETHER OR NOT WOULDN'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE THEN HUH!"
Had Izaya been a less sophisticated man, he would have tugged like a madman at his hair. However, since he considered himself an elegant, sophisticated man unlike the beast in his kitchen, he merely glared gracefully and slammed the perfectly solved cube down onto his desk, annoyed that Heiwajima Shizuo of all people had finished the challenge before he had.
"'I just put the colors back together' he says. Obviously if the colors are mixed up putting them back together would equate to solving it!"
"…I just don't get his logic at all!"
Izaya said in annoyance as he picked up the cube, looked at it for a moment then put it back down and pushed it angrily away.
"I'll have to buy another one."
He said to himself as he looked at the cube which Shizuo had solved without even knowing. He scoffed, leaning his cheek on his hand and biting his lip in irritation. His latest entertaining puzzle had been ruined by the monster who didn't even know the gravity of what he had done.
"I can't tell if he's dumb or smart. Can't he be not unpredictable for once?"
With an almost weary sigh, Izaya got up from his desk. He walked across the living room with a glance at the fridge, wondering if he should unpack the groceries since Shizuo refused to do it.
But then he remembered he could make Namie do it instead, so he turned away and made his way up the stairs. He looked to make sure Shizuo was busy cooking in the kitchen before he carefully removed several files from the book shelf, held them under his arm, and smoothly moved the rest of the files and books back in place to completely cover the jar which contained Celty's slumbering head.
With a small exhale when he saw that Shizuo was still oblivious to the existence of Celty's head in his apartment, Izaya turned back and made his way back down the stairs. Instead of going back to his desk, he made his way to the couches instead, sitting down and placing the files onto the table.
He then went back to his desk, picking up the few files Namie had placed there. With a grin and the intention to fully undo Namie's hard work, he walked back to the couches and placed them onto the table.
The object that had been on top of the files slid off. Izaya caught it with his quick reflexes before it met the floor. He leaned back and surveyed the table covered fully by files with a smile, his index finger spinning the cube, rotating the different colours on the different faces in a blur of colours.
"Shizu-chan shouldn't have solved this," crimson eyes shifted their gaze to the spinning cube, "It's not your kind of work at all."
"Shizu-chan's work is more of menial tasks….such as arranging and filing messy papers. Ahhh yes….the mess will be annoying for Shizu-chan, won't it?"
Izaya's grin seemed like that of a mischievous kid about to squash a colourful bug he had found. The colourful cube suddenly stopped spinning and fell into his hand, a mixture of colours on each face again.
"After all, I really do love creating a mess…..especially for Shizu-chan."
...
...
...
The Rubik's Cube is supposed to be a metaphor and kind of analogy to the situation. Shizuo solving it without even knowing and overriding Izaya's hard work is supposed to parallel how Shizuo protected Izaya from his own miscalculation without even knowing. Well he knew, but it wasn't his intention to. And it was Izaya who caused the situation in the first place, and caused Shizuo to get drunk which lead to Shizuo protecting him.
Izaya doesn't know this, just as he doesn't know Shizuo solved the Rubik Cube and finished his hard work (Yakuza war with one mafia boss), until Shizuo actually showed it to him. Shizuo did it casually without even thinking, paralleling how Shizuo just does difficult/impossible things without even thinking (because he's pissed off), like how he defeated Michele and Luciano and saved Izaya's life, or just in general for his character. It's a big deal to Izaya because he treasures his life but for Shizuo he's just repaying his debt and venting his anger, like how it's a big deal to Izaya that Shizuo solved the Rubik's Cube while for Shizuo he just wanted to 'put the colours back together' and doesn't really understand Izaya's frustration at the matter. Just like how he doesn't get Izaya's frustration in general when he ruins all his plans.
Izaya can solve situations too and is good at tying up loose ends, but he's the best at making a mess - he puts things together only to break them all apart.
I have no idea where the Rubik's Cube came from, I just realized it kind of fits the situation haha. I couldn't resist~
'I'm back' and 'Welcome home' is Tadaima and Okaeri respectively. It's a greeting in Japanese families, and is also common between husband and wife, the husband saying 'I'm home/I'm back' when he comes back and the wife saying 'Welcome home/Welcome back'. Because in a typical Japanese family, the husband is traditionally the breadwinner. Though it can also be used between friends who are like family. For example between roommates or someone back to his friends from a journey. Hm the essence is that it's used to welcome someone back when you've been waiting for them.
So, Izaya was secretly waiting for Shizuo to come back~though for Shizuo he meant it in a more 'I'm back' casual kind of way. While Izaya was more sincere ('Welcome home')? Hahaha. Unconsciously.
There's a Japanese saying that if you sneeze, someone is talking about you. Though for Shizuo it's more like 'roaring'. Shizuo's grocery shopping adventure will be in the Timeline after this story. If I write it it'd be too long so I decided to put it in the timeline instead. This story should have less than 15 chapters (and one Timeline).