Pippy had been on her break at the coffee house on Thursday about three weeks after her first date with the Goth kids, who came to her with a debate that had apparently been going on since the previous Sunday, which had been her fourth date with Damien.
"Pippy, you were there, Henrietta clearly said before your fifth date, right?" Georgie insisted as he sipped his frozen mocha.
"I'm pretty sure she did, but that's just a saying, is it not?" Pippy pointed out.
"Thank you!" Said Evan and Henrietta in unison.
"The term you said was before, Henrietta! That implies within the meaning of the word that you meant any time before a certain period, not that time and the period itself!" Dylan said, clenching his fist on the table.
"Including that said period was absolutely implied, Dylan!" Henrietta insisted.
"You want me to get a dictionary!?" Georgie insisted as Dylan took out his smart phone to look up the definition. Apparently, the fifty dollar bet that Georgie and Henrietta had made about Pippy and Damien sleeping together had not only now involved Dylan and Evan, but the price had been raised to two hundred dollars.
"Before. Definition, during the period of time preceding a particular event, date, or time. See! You said that Pippy and Damien would go fifty shades before their fifth date, which implied that by the fourth date that they'd do it! They didn't, though, that means Dylan and I already won! Now where's our money?!" Dylan demanded before taking another gulp of his coffee.
"Nowhere unless they go through the fifth date without fifty shades!" Henrietta insisted as Evan nodded in agreement.
"Bullshit! You owe us a hundred, each!" Georgie said.
"Not yet, we don't!"
"Yes, you do!"
"No, we don't!"
"Yes you do!"
"No we don't!"
"Excuse me, but isn't my opinion in this the very reason you came here?" Pippy said interjecting feeling awkward as the other four engaged in their argument.
"Sorry, girl. Yeah. So what do you think about it? You're our tie breaker." Henrietta said as they all stared unblinkingly at Pippy. She felt herself tense up, she was very happy to not be Tweek at that moment or she would've had a heart attack.
"Okay… from the way the conversation had panned out, I do believe Henrietta truly intended that the fifth date itself counted. So I think that's how the bet should be, but I still am very uncomfortable that you make bets about me shagging my boyfriend." Pippy blushed at calling Damien her boyfriend. They had become "Facebook official" as it was apparently called after their third date about a week and a half before.
"You heard her, you don't get a cent yet!" Evan said as he took the last gulp of his cup of coffee.
"We will after Saturday, though!" Georgie retorted sipping on his drink. This Saturday after their group session they were going to be going on their fifth date. Damien had promised her a big surprise, so she was very excited for it.
"So… has Mr. Grey said the three big words to you, yet?" Georgie asked Pippy leaving the girl blushing.
Meanwhile in Hell, Damien had been working on his fireworks skills. This Saturday was very important to him. He was going to make sure that he was able to get this right, he had been dating Pippy almost a whole month, but he wanted to tell her something since he was eight. He was going to tell her that he loves her.
Satan walked into his son's room being accompanied by a dark haired gray skin demon girl with small yellow horns coming out of her head.
"Pookie? I'd like you to meet somebody." He said.
"Don't call me Pookie! Who is this?" Damien said as he looked to the demon girl, smiling sharp teeth to him.
"This is Div. Div, this is Damien. It is my hope you two will get quite acquainted with one another." His father made suggestive eyebrow movements as his eyes moved between the two of them. Damien frowned deeply staring at his father.
"Oh. That's who she is. Father, she may leave. I don't need any arranged suitors, thank you very much. I am quite happy with my girlfriend." He gave Div a look that let her know she was no longer needed or welcomed. She huffed lightly before leaving. Satan stared at his son in anger.
"Damien! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a nice demon girl for you!? Everyone knows how fast you are to reject everybody so it's impossible to find anyone even willing to consider the risk! It is damn near impossible! Look, I know you're having fun with your cute little human girlfriend but damn it she's not queen material! She's a mortal! Sure, mortals can be fun distractions, but it's time to start thinking seriously about your future as king of Hell! Instead of only thinking of some human tranny tramp." Then, for the first time in his entire life, Damien Thorn slapped his father in the face. Hard.
The devil was too shocked to be angry as he looked at his son, his charcoal eyes burning red.
"Don't you dare ever call her that again! Don't try to enforce any beliefs you have onto me, when you run off every night to fuck any horny piece of garbage in Hell to fill some kind of sick emptiness you have inside that you just can't admit you don't know how to handle on your own! Deep down, you're furious I could actually fall in love with somebody, human or otherwise, while you sit alone introducing yourself as this scary tormenter when all you want is to not feel alone!" He had only let inklings of his feelings towards his father come through when he'd talk to Pippy. But now it seemed that a trickle had turned into a waterfall.
"Why don't you just talk to me!? ACTUALLY talk to me!? Not coddle me or demand things, but actually talk about your problems! Dad… you wonder why I seem to have no respect for you!? You have barely any respect for yourself! You are so determined to ignore that you know you are missing something, that seeing me love somebody… really, actually love somebody… is driving you nuts. Why can't you be happy for me? I have finally found somebody in my life who isn't terrified of me… even when they should be. Pippy is the most beautiful, kind, and brave girl I have ever met. If that doesn't make her worthy of being with me, then I don't want to be king of anything. I know it's really fast to bring anything like marriage into this, so I won't. But she is the greatest thing in my life. I hope you find a man who can make you feel that way, Dad… But until then, please stop trying to find mercy lays from any willing gigolo just because you feel alone. I want you to respect and care about yourself, because if you don't, no one else will either. It is because of this mortal girl that I finally have the strength and courage to speak to you. Not as the Antichrist to the Devil… but as Damien. Your son." Damien took a deep breath as Satan's eyes softened.
"You really are in love with her… aren't you?" He said lightly. Damien nodded in response, still saying quiet, trying to be calm about the speech he just gave. Damien took a deep sigh as he finally looked his son in the eye.
"You're right. I've been… selfish, to you. Maybe that's okay for me to act to other people… but certainly not to you. If this girl is important to you, and if you want to be with her… then that is what really matters. I just… I just don't know who'd ever want to love somebody like me. God himself cast me out of heaven… I think maybe on some level, I want to protect your heart. You know how humans are… one little bit of temptation from a different source and bam they leave. You've been through so much… I just don't want you to know that pain."
"Pippy is different, Dad. There's not a selfish bone in her entire body. She has an entirely pure soul. She makes me want to be a better person. Nobody makes me happy the way she does. That's why I bought that apartment in South Park, I'm transferring to South Park High to be with her."
"Alright then, now I know you said you didn't want to get involved in the ideas of marriage this early, but since you won't give any of my suitors for you a chance, I'll try the one you picked out."
"Wait you don't mean…"
"It's time for me to meet your girlfriend!"
"Dad, no!" Damien tried to insist, but the big red man had already disappeared in a flash of fire.
Back in Tweak's Coffee shop, the girl opened her mouth to answer to the question about whether or not Damien had told her he loved her, but the establishment had been hit with a hard earthquake, which sent them all to the ground in fear as a large fire seemed to appear in the middle of the shop.
"HOLY FUCK! B-BALLS! AAAAAH! S-SO MUCH PRESSURE!" Tweek started screaming as he left through the back entrance.
Standing now in the middle of the coffee shop was the big red horned man with hooves himself, Satan.
"PHILLIS PIRRUP, I HAVE COME FOR YOU! To join my home for dinner. Damien is absolutely smitten with you, and I am just dying to see why! You're the first girl he's ever loved or even liked, so I'm very fascinated to get to know you as well!"
"U-umm… alright." Pippy said, honestly too scared to be able to say anything else as the Goth kids stared in complete awe of the devil.
"Well, Fantastic! We're eating lamb for dinner, now just grab my hand little lady, and we'll be on our way! By the way, I love your hair!" Satan gushed as he took the girl's very slender hand in his much larger one and they transported to his and Damien's home in Hell.
Pippy wasn't very surprised to see the brimstone lining of the castle and small fires everywhere, however she was very surprised to see the pink couch with pink and yellow flowers all over as well as a yellow rug and a 50's television set clearly made to be a living room.
"Welcome to our home! The lamb still has about fifteen minutes left in the oven, would you like to watch some television? I just adore The Golden Girls!" the devil gushed as he showed the blonde over to the couch and turned on the television. Pippy simply thought it better to just sit and watch along with Satan. About five minutes in, the dark haired man of her dreams managed to find them and smiled the instant he saw Pippy.
"Dad! You scared the crap out of me! Pippy, did he hurt you?" Damien said as he rushed to her side, pulling her up into his arms protectively.
"Oh, heavens no! He simply just asked me to dinner and invited me to watch a show with him, that's all, love." She said moving his bangs out of his eyes. He calmed down at her touch and simply nodded and kissed her forehead. Satan watched in approval. The rest of the evening was going very well, Satan learned in no time why his son adored this young lady so much, and had come to adore her as the daughter he didn't have. With her style, politeness, and distaste for an unfair god, he couldn't think of a better match for his son. The three happily exchanged many funny stories, and Damien was so glad to see his father welcome his girlfriend so much. Once everyone had finished eating the delicious lamb which had been served with a side of broccoli and cheese potatoes, Pippy's phone had then starting ringing very loudly through the room causing the laughing creatures to silence themselves awkwardly.
"I apologize, I had thought I had my ringer off, I'll shut my phone down." She said as she reached to turn off the cell phone before Satan raised his hand to stop her.
"It's okay to answer, Pippy, I understand." The Devil said. The blonde nodded appreciatively as she excused herself to the hallway to answer. To her unpleasant surprise, it was Georgie.
"Pippy, you've got to help me! My Dad found my escape bag in the bathroom and nobody else is picking up, the police even put me on hold! I'm hiding and he's got a bat and I think he's going to try to- oh um, hi Dad! Wait, wait, no! No! Agh!" as she could hear a scuffle ensue, the cellphone connection had been dropped. Pippy ran back in, tears filling her eyes.
Damien and Pippy walked to the front door and the boy knocked six times. When no response was given other than moving and screams, he sighed and punched the door in having it fly off the hinges. Pippy covered her mouth for a second before rushing into the house, entering the main hallway. Luckily for her, Georgie's father had thrown him at that exact moment into the hallway from a room that from a quick glance seemed to be the kitchen. Pippy's breath choked in her throat as she saw Georgie's arm bent in a very wrong direction. His left eye was blackened and he was bleeding from his mouth and nose… Georgie could barely make out her blonde hair and immediately tried crawling weakly to her while crying. Pippy an immediately to him falling on her knees and holding him in tears petting his hair, swearing to never let this happen again, no matter what.
She then heard the drunken steps of his father. He had dark blonde hair that fell past his shoulders, as well as a patchy and uneven beard. His eyes were bloodshot though the thick rims of his round glasses. He had been wearing a white stained undershirt and flannel pants with a hole in the side of them. He was holding a bloody bat in his hand, much to Pippy's horror. He reeked of cheesy poofs and alcohol and Pippy actually gagged.
"You beastly drunken wanker! How could you do this to your own son!? Do you have any idea how wonderful this boy is!? Maybe you would if you could even see straight, you harlot spawn!" She said with hate towards him.
"Who the fuck are you telling me to raise my son!?" He spat at the girl as he began to step towards her raising his bat up. As it came swinging towards her, she closed her eyes and a loud snap had been echoed through the hall. She opened her eyes to see Damien holding what had been the top half of the bat.
"Holy crap, he snapped the bat in half with one hand!" Georgie managed to say low. Pippy stared along with Georgie's father in shock. Damien then turned the piece of bat into cinders in his hand as he stared at the drunk man before clenching his throat into his hand dangerously.
"I suggest you never lay a finger on this boy or this girl, or anyone else for that matter ever again… Who do you think you are? Crushing people smaller than you?" He tightened his grip and the man could obviously be seen having trouble breathing.
"Doesn't feel so good, does it, asshole?" Damien was without a doubt killing him.
"P-ple…" was barely audible from Georgie's father.
"Damien. Stop." Pippy commanded. Damien's fiery eyes moved to her, she was giving him a very straight and brave face. She removed her jacket and used it as a pillow under Georgie's head before standing and walking to Damien, placing her hands gently over his.
"Let him go, love… This isn't who you are. You are much more than this… please, don't kill him."
"But the things he's done to Georgie..!" Damien tried to protest.
"Will be dealt with accordingly… murder is not the way." Pippy placed one of her hands to his cheek gently.
"I love you, Damien. I know you completely… please, let him go." She said as her eyes pleaded with him. The boy growled low before throwing the man against the wall, letting him go to struggle to regain breathing.
"You better be counting your blessings, this angel of a girl just saved your sorry ass… Say goodbye to your son because he sure as hell isn't coming back here ever again." The man was already passed out. Passed out, but alive. Damien then walked to the boy and picked him up bridal style as Pippy grabbed her jacket. They went back to her jeep and Damien helped get himself and Georgie into the back while Pippy jumped into the driver's seat. She flipped through the radio until the song "Has Anyone Ever Written Anything for You" by Fleetwood Mac played, the sweet and smooth melody seeming to soothe Georgie. Pippy looked to the back seat at Damien.
"You did the right thing… and I meant what I said in there. I'm in with love you, Damien."
"This wasn't how I expected to say it… but I'm in love with you, too. Let's get him to the hospital." Pippy nodded in agreement and she drove to Hell's Pass.
"T-Thank you…" Georgie managed to get out. Damien smiled to the boy, not used to the feeling of pleasure that came from helping others.
"I'm going to help with some of your wounds, I can help with the really bad stuff." Damien took a deep breath and looked at his arm, Damien frowned deeper realizing it was out of its socket. Damien took a deep breath and as his hands glowed red, he put Georgie's arm back into its socket in a way that healed it as if it never even happened even though Georgie still screamed. Damien then covered his swollen eye, managing to make the swelling disappear, but the color was still dark. He had Georgie open his mouth, showing two teeth had been knocked out. Damien could only stop the bleeding, Georgie was going to have to get replacements on his own. Damien also noticed that he was bleeding from his head.
"Shit, Georgie!" Damien breathed out as he lightly held the boy's held in his hands and stopped the bleeding, and healing any possible brain trauma and concussions. Any other bruises or cuts would have to be handled at the hospital.
"Pippy, never break up with this guy." Georgie said, able to breathe more clearly. Pippy smiled to herself as she continued to drive.
Once they arrived, they had Georgie immediately cared for. Thankfully, Georgie was patched up easily in a half an hour.
"Alright, Georgie. I'm going to make you a deal. Considering who I am, I have a lot money. I will buy you an apartment in South Park for you and I to live in, I can't guarantee that I'll be there all of the time, but I'll definitely be there."
"Wait… you're moving to town?" Georgie said in shock.
"Actually… I already have as of about two days ago. For the most part, anyway. How else am I going to protect my girl from the jerks at school? Honestly, that was another part of the surprise. But Georgie, if you'd like somewhere to live, I promise to pay the whole rent." Damien offered.
"Yes! Thank you, Damien!" Georgie said smiling.
"So… a surprise, you say?" Pippy said smiling.
"That's right, but I guess the cats out of the bag, love." He was met with Pippy's arms wrapped around him.
"Georgie!" They heard a voice say, then they saw a canadian boy in a blue sweater run straight into Georgie's arms planting a kiss on his lips.
"Ike, what are you doing here? It's a school night…" Georgie asked.
"Henrietta told me what happened and there was no way I could live with myself if I didn't make sure that you were okay, I love you, Georgie, and you know that."
"I do… and if I could find an unconformist way to say I love you too, then I would, but until then I guess I can only say I love you too." The couple kissed again and then they all got back into Pippy's car, and then she dropped off Ike at the broflowski home, then dropping off Damien and Georgie at their new apartment. Before going inside, Damien made sure to face her once again.
"I love you, Phillis Pirrup." He said simply.
"I love you too, Damien Thorn." She responded. The two kissed and then Pippy went home.