I know, I know. I'm evil. I'm sorry. D: I really did want to upload this chapter sooner, but guess what? LONG CHAPTER! Yay! Sorry it's pretty depressing, but the whole game is, really. Anyways, enjoy this chapter and review if you would like!
KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA KATJAA! (Needed to get that out of my system. xD)
I don't own The Walking Dead. I guess shooting stars don't always work. .
The train rumbled as it flew down the tracks. Lee leaned against the wall inside the boxcar. He was watching Clementine, who was huddled up with her knees against her chest and her sad gaze focused on Duck, who was in his mother's arms. He had gotten much worse in the little time after they got the train started.
Chuck was standing in the middle of the car, surprisingly balanced compared to the rest of the group who were either sitting in a corner like Carley, Lilly and Katjaa, or looking out the open sides of the boxcar like Ben. Probably because he had lived on a train before all this even happened.
"So, how'd you get that nasty wound on your head?" Chuck asked Lee, breaking the silence that had surrounded the group since they got the train going.
"Hmm?" Lee snapped his gaze from Clementine to Chuck. He hadn't really been paying any attention to anything but Clementine. She hadn't said anything since earlier that day, and Lee was getting worried.
"I asked ya how you got the wound," Chuck repeated, tipping his head slightly out of curiosity.
Lee's gaze traveled across the car to Lilly, who was sitting in a corner with her knees tucked against her chest, her hands still bound behind her back. She hadn't even seemed to notice anyone talking around her, lost in her own world.
"Shooting accident," Lee answered Chuck, choosing his words carefully as to not lie but also trying not to upset Lilly any more then she already looked. But she stilled seemed unfazed, her eyes dark.
"Ah. Pretty nasty accident," Chuck commented skeptically.
"Yeah," Lee turned away, wanting to avoid any more questions. Not that he disliked Chuck, but he wasn't in the mood to talk. All he could think about was what was going to happen to Duck...soon, judging by how the boy's eyes were drooping and his coughs were getting more and more feeble.
Katjaa cradled him in her arms. Her shoulder was covered in blood from where Duck's head was lying limp against her shoulder. The only indication that he was still alive were his shallow breaths and his barely open eyes.
Duck suddenly convulsed with a loud cough that shook his whole body. Scarlet blood trickled from his lips as he turned head turned weakly, more by gravity than conscious movement.
"LEE! Lee, I need you right now. I need you to go get Ken," Katjaa's tone was one of concealed panic.
Lee quickly crouched beside her, "What's-"
"Would you get that off his face? My hands are full here," Katjaa interrupted, pulling Duck closer to her tenderly.
Lee picked up the rag Katjaa had been using to wipe Duck's face earlier.
She looked at Lee, "Thank you. Could you just get that off his face, please?" She turned her head to look at her son.
Lee reached out with the rag and gently cleaned the deep red stains around Duck's mouth and chin.
Katjaa shook her head subtly, her frown deepening, "He's out of time," she looked up at Lee, her expression tired and eyes dull, "We need to stop this train."
"Okay," Lee agreed standing up, thinking about how to break the news to Kenny. What way are you supposed to tell a man that his son is dying? Lee didn't know what to say to him that would make any of this better.
She seemed to notice his pause, "Please," she added, looking down at Duck.
Lee turned towards the door at the front of the car. Carley, who was sitting in front of it, scooted over so he could exit and gave him a look that said, 'I'm sorry you have to do this.'
She then looked at a pale and trembling Duck, grief darkening her gaze. Her eyes moved back to Lee.
'So, very sorry.'
Lee tipped his head down slightly in acknowledgment, and then stepped out of the boxcar.
Around the train, the world flashed by in a blur. Trees passed as splotches of brown, orange and red.
Lee carefully stepped over the separation between the boxcar and the cab. As he made his way down the narrow metal path that served as means to get between the front room of the cab where Kenny was controling the train and the back, Lee though about what he would tell Kenny. He knew there was no way to make it better, but he didn't know what the best way to inform him would be. He couldn't just say, 'Oh hey Kenny, your son is dying and we've gotta stop the train to take care of it, thanks!'.
But what really is there to say? This is impossible.
Lee found himself standing with the cab door right in front of him. He pulled it open and stepped inside. Kenny was sitting, staring straight ahead as if he hadn't noticed Lee came in.
Lee settled for a simple, "You need to stop the train."
Kenny looked back at Lee and glared. Ignoring him, he turned back around and set his eyes firmly on the tracks ahead.
Lee realized that he was still clutching Duck's bloody rag in his hand.
"Kenny," Lee tried to get the man's attention, holding the rag out in front of him, "KEN."
"What the hell's that?" Kenny demanded, anger underlying in his tone.
"Your son's blood," Lee answered, hoping Kenny would get the message.
Kenny seemed to ignore that as well and narrowed his eyes, "Get out of here, Lee."
"You know he's dying," Lee felt horrible for saying it, but Kenny needed to finally face the facts.
"Nobody knows shit! He'll be fine," Kenny protested, his attention returning to the path in front of the train.
"Wake the fuck up, man," Lee pressed. Kenny needed to realize what was happening before it was to late.
Kenny's head turned to give Lee a menacing glare, "What's the goddamn deal? He's a little sick, but we can't just quit," Kenny paused a moment, but then continued in denial, "It's just a scratch! He's not like the others. Jesus, all y'all are just makin' it worse!"
Kenny needed to see what was right in front of him.
"You're in denial!"
Kenny's face contorted in rage, "And you've given up! On Duck, on EVERYONE!"
"Stop it, goddamnit!" Lee shouted. No matter how much sympathy he had for Kenny right now, he knew that his mind was clouded and he needed to snap out of it.
"Fuck you, Lee," Kenny hissed.
"You're gonna listen," insisted Lee.
Kenny stood crossly and faced Lee, a challenge in his eyes, "Or what?"
Lee could see that he was looking for a fight, which wouldn't help anyone right now.
"Calm down and-" Lee tried to remedy the situation but Kenny cut him off.
"How the fuck do you 'calm down' after a day like today?"
"By talking to your friend," Lee suggested calmly, despite the nagging feeling that Kenny would arrogantly ignore him and start becoming violent. But, to his surprise, Kenny sank back into his seat.
Taking this chance to talk to him, Lee started, "You think you're the reason Duck was bitten. Like you had this coming, or something," Lee was pretty sure that Kenny still blamed himself for Shawn's death, "You didn't kill Hershel's son."
Kenny sighed defeatedly, "Yes, I did. And now it's catching up to me."
Lee shook his head, "That's not what went down," he assured Kenny, "You looked out for your kid and a bad thing happened to someone else's."
Kenny buried his face in his hands, "There ain't no way this world lets my son live when I helped put someone else's in the ground."
"That's not the way it works. You know that," he said, placing a hand on Kenny's shoulder.
Kenny looked up from his hands, frowning with his eyes somber.
"Stop the train, man," Lee finished, seeing that Kenny wasn't hiding his despair behind rage anymore.
Kenny paused, his gaze falling to the floor. He exhaled and reached out for the brake and pulled the lever. The train slowed, screeching, and then finally came to a stop.
Kenny paused a few moments, his hand still resting on the brake, before standing up, exiting the cab and climbing down the ladder. Lee followed shortly after.
Katjaa was already standing outside of the car. Duck was laying inside by the opening on the side, his breaths small and strained. Clem was sitting next to him, her legs hanging over the side, swinging gently. Her eyes were trained sadly on Duck. She was losing her friend soon, and she knew it.
Both Kenny and Lee had made their way next to the car. Katjaa turned her attention from her son to Kenny, "Ken. It's...I think it's time."
Kenny closed his eyes, his expression clearly pained. He opened his eyes after a long breath.
He turned towards Chuck, who had also gotten out of the car, "The boy's been bit, in case you haven't figured that out," Kenny informed.
Chuck frowned and turned his head towards the ground, crossing his arms over his chest.
"What do you need?" Lee asked solemnly, looking from Duck to Kenny.
"I...I..." Kenny was at a loss for words.
Lee glanced towards Kenny's wife, "Katjaa?" he asked. He knew what had to be done, but...there was no simple answer to this.
Katjaa shook her head gently, squeezing her eyes shut, "It's time to..." she paused, giving a depressing sigh, "...this is not possible," she finished, opening her eyes and sniffing.
Kenny's eyes met his wife's, "What are we gonna do?"
Katjaa stroked Ducks hair in a motherly way, "We can't allow him to become one of those...things," she decided, holding back tears.
"But what if...what if he doesn't?" Kenny asked, back to hopeless 'what-ifs'.
Katjaa's glistening eyes spun towards her husband, "Kenny, I love you very much. I love our son more than life itself," she blinked the tears from her eyes, not allowing herself to cry, "But I need you to hear me. What you are saying, that he may not turn, is foolish."
"But-" Kenny started stubbornly, once again trying to not face the truth.
"No," she interrupted bravely. She hadn't been hiding the truth from herself, and needed Kenny to realize what was happening.
Kenny's eyes fell, "There's..." he trailed off for a moment, "Come on, Kat..."
Katjaa shook her head, "If you think of one, let me know."
"Isn't there some sort of pill, or something we can just give him?" Kenny insisted.
"Stop it," Katjaa breathed shakily.
Kenny continued, distress obvious in his tone, "He can just drift off to sleep, right, hon? I mean, Jesus, this is our son," he tugged on his hair with both of his hands.
"I know," Katjaa persisted, "But we know it's...here, or nothing," she gestured at the side of her head with a finger.
Kenny ran out of ways to lie to himself, "Well...fuck...just...who, then?" he asked, his voice strained, "Do you want me to?"
Lee knew that neither parent would want to do it, and they wouldn't force that burden on each other. They shouldn't have to ever do something like that.
"I'll do it," Lee offered.
Katjaa shook her head, "No. It should be a parent."
"No parent should have to do something like this."
Kenny tipped his head down, "Lee's right, Kat. We can say our goodbyes and...just let that be it."
"I don't know..." Katjaa expressed, but then turned to Lee. She looked defeated, "Lee, you'd be doing this family a great service."
Her shoulders were slumped slightly as she suggested, "Why don't we take him into the forest - so Clementine doesn't have to see."
Kenny nodded at the ground, "Yeah..."
"Give us a moment, to say goodbye?" Katjaa pleaded.
"Of course," Lee replied, his already sorrowful frown growing deeper. He couldn't even begin to imagine what these two were going through.
Katjaa closed her eyes, freeing a pent-up sigh of sadness. She sniffed, and scooped Duck up into her arms, slinging him over her shoulder. She cradled the side of his head in a palm, using the other to keep him supported. Duck's arms hung limply around Katjaa's neck and at her side. He wheezed, his fragile breaths hardly visible.
Katjaa started towards the trees, her steps heavy. Kenny followed a few seconds behind.
Clementine watched heartbreakingly as they walked away. "What's happening?" she asked quietly, her sad amber eyes filling Lee with despair.
How was he supposed to explain this? He didn't want Clementine to be even more depressed than she already was about losing her closest friend she'd had.
"I'm going to...take care of Duck," he explained gently, meeting Clementine's gaze.
"I thought he was going to die," she whimpered.
"I'm going to make sure he's okay," Lee didn't know what else to say. In a way, it was true. He was making sure Duck didn't feel any more pain.
"But how? He's bitten," she asked.
Lee looked off towards the forest. Kenny, Katjaa and Duck had already disappeared from sight into the trees, "By making sure he doesn't come back," Lee placed a hand on Clementine's shoulder.
The girl looked at her feet, "Oh."
Lee knew that things had to get better. They would; they had to.
"Look Clem, things will-"
His sentence was interrupted by a sharp bang blaring in the air from the woods.
A gunshot.
"NOO!" Kenny's voice rang out from the woods.
Lee's head whipped around towards Clem, "Clementine! Get into the train," he instructed firmly. She vigorously nodded, her gaze full of fear, and climbed quickly into the boxcar. She hurried towards Carley, who was standing rigidly with her eyes widened.
Lee swiveled around and raced into the forest. Trees spun by and leaves crunched under his feet as he sprinted towards where he heard Kenny's call of distress. The air was cold, and it spread to his lungs with every breath he took; but that was nothing compared to the icy dread weighing in his bones.
When he finally came across them, his heart froze.
Katjaa lay motionless, a growing puddle of blood pooling around her head. Loosely gripped in one of her hands was a handgun. Her eyes were blank and clouded, staring unfocused into the sky above.
Kenny was crouched over his wife, his hand on her shoulder.
"Why, Kat? Honey, oh fuckin' God..." he sobbed. Whimpers escaped him as tears ran tracks down his face.
Duck sat at an angle, leaned against a tree. He was unresponsive except for his rasping breaths that rattled his whole body. There were dark circles around his eyes and the rest of his skin was pasty and had an unnatural tint.
"Oh my God..." Lee whispered, his eyes wide with disbelief. There was no way...
"I...I..." Kenny choked out through the tears. He reached up his hand and closed Katjaa's unseeing eyes gently with two fingers.
He sniffed, and turned his head to look at his son. Duck didn't even look like he was seeing any of this, to exhausted to move his head the slightest bit.
Kenny delicately pried the gun from Katjaa's cold fingers. He stood, and took his place in front of Duck. Lee stepped next to him. They both watched a moment as Duck lied there, struggling for breath.
"What do we do?" Kenny asked helplessly, glancing at Lee.
Kenny had seen to much. Lee was worried that if Kenny had to shoot his son...he wouldn't want to continue living, and he'd join Katjaa.
"Give me the gun, Ken. I'll do it."
Kenny paused before he placed the gun into Lee's hands, taking a few steps back.
Lee lifted the gun, aiming at Duck's forehead. Suddenly, it felt so much heavier. This gun defined lives; whether it's saving them...or taking them away.
And he fired.