Standard Disclaimers: I own nothing of Naruto.
Author Disclaimers: This chapter kicked my butt. But, I'll babble a bit more at the end. Without further ado - the last chapter!
Steam rose from the surface of the divided hot spring, dampening the blond locks escaping from Tsunade's impromptu bun. Lazily, she tucked the pesky strands behind her ears and settled a little deeper in the pool.
It'd been a rough month or so and this marked the first time since returning that she'd been able to truly relax. It wasn't that Shizune had done a bad job while Tsunade had been gone. The capable assistant had been nearly impeccable in her role as Hokage. In fact, the massive backlog of paperwork that normally occupied the Hokage's desk had been reduced to mere millimeters in height.
No, it was in impersonating Tsunade that Shizune had deviated from the script. It had been subtle, of course. It took Tsunade several days to realize that her usual bookie appeared to have skipped town in a hurry and almost a week to realize that several liquor stores were mysteriously closing every time she came into view.
Ah, well. She supposed it didn't really matter. A number of the over-all improvements Shizune had instituted were good ones and even this one was not, exactly, bad. Not that Tsunade intended to completely give up her gambling and drinking, but maybe it wouldn't hurt to lay off of them.
Just a little.
The decision would likely have shocked her friends, had any of them been alive.
"How could you send him to such a dangerous place, alone?"
It was funny how, even after all this time, Naruto's words still echoed in her head. Never mind that Jiraiya had been a grown man, perfectly capable of gauging his own strength. Never mind that he'd identified the mission himself, and assigned himself to it.
Never mind any of it.
In the end, it had been her responsibility. And she shouldn't have trusted that, just because he thought he could handle it, he hadn't needed help. She'd failed, as both a friend and as a Hokage, and she'd lost him as a result.
She sighed, a long and tired sound. "…bloody fool."
"Well, that's not very nice," the reproach was mild and very familiar.
Tsunade's eyes flew open and she quickly scanned the still empty pool around her. Then her lips quirked up in an involuntary smile.
The dividing wall that neatly parceled out the spring into a male section and a female section was very sturdy, stood over fourteen feet high, and was inspected daily for cracks or holes by the staff.
But apparently it was not going to stop a noisy jonin from commenting on things he shouldn't be paying attention to. Whether he'd been masking his chakra before, or she'd been too lost in her thoughts to notice it when he'd come in, the distinct flare of Kakashi's presence on the other side was now quite evident.
"Shouldn't you be tricking Guy into paying for your dinner right about now?" she shot back irritably. The sun was low enough in the sky for it, and the slight hollowing of her own belly reminded her how long she'd spent in her contemplations.
There was a pause from the other side. "I don't know whether to be flattered or worried that you know my habits so well."
Tsunade sniffed, "Be ashamed that you have habits at all."
"There has to be some way for people to find me when I'm not on assignment," Kakashi defended his actions logically.
Strangely enough, that made perfect sense to her. She speculated that it might even be true. Tsunade's shoulders relaxed a little and she settled deeper into the water. "Speaking of which, what are you doing here? I thought you'd been assigned that tracking mission by Wave?"
She knew that he had.
She also knew that he'd been gone for two and a half weeks, returning around noon just three days ago. His mission report had just happened to cross her desk before she coincidentally made the decision to head to the hot springs.
"I did," Kakashi agreed. "But I'm back now."
"Obviously."
She hadn't been worried. Imagine the hell she'd have to live through if she worried every time Kakashi was sent out on a mission? Imagine how crippling that could become if she realized that, despite her best efforts, she had acquired yet another hostage to fate? And of course, if he died, it would inevitably be her fault. Just another escalation to the types of pain she had to face with the people she cared about. First, to see her brother's broken body, then to feel Dan slipping away beneath her hands, then to be responsible for not sending help with Jiraiya on that mission...
And with Kakashi?
If he died, it would be because she'd ordered him to his death.
"Hokage-sama?"
Her eyes closed and she fought down the surge of anxiety.
She was not going to worry about Kakashi. He was a skilled shinobi and one of the finest…weapons… in the village's arsenal. In her arsenal. She was no weakling, no timid mouse, to hesitate in using him despite how she…
…
Besides.
He was Sharingan Kakashi. Next in line for title of Hokage. He was strong. He'd be fine. To not have faith in his abilities was almost disrespectful.
No.
It was disrespectful and he deserved better from her.
"Tsunade-sama?"
"I was thinking of Jiriaya," she said finally, evenly. Better to betray a small weakness rather than a gaping one. Eyes still closed, she focused on slowly letting the tension drain away from each muscle. The brat had survived this long. He'd outlive her. It would be fine.
"Ah. You must miss him a great deal."
The pang of old regret was a welcome contrast to the sharpness of potential futures. She focused on that, gratefully. "Of course. He was the last person who could see me as Tsunade and not as an authority figure." Except for Naruto, but being thought of as an old woman was hardly better.
"Oh. I wouldn't be so sure of that."
Kakashi's usual careless tone held something guarded just under the surface.
And, since he'd allowed this fact to be noticed, by default it held an invitation as well.
Tsunade opened her eyes.
Somehow she wasn't surprised to find him perched atop the dividing wall, watching her carefully.
She met his gaze and the silence immediately filled with all of things neither of them were going to voice…
…could afford to voice
…..and, in the end, even had to voice.
Concern. Loyalty. Admiration.
Protectiveness. Devotion.
Affection… deeper than affection…
Technically, it was Kakashi who broke first. The slightest of shrugs conveyed helplessness in the face of such emotional circumstances, while the steadiness of his gaze spoke to both a distinct lack of regret and a subtler absence of expectation.
To which Tsunade replied with a slow blink of acknowledgement, adding volumes of sub-text to speak eloquently of understanding, acceptance, and with a twitch of her lips, even agreement.
Eyes slowly reviewed the curved outlines of almost smiling mouths, familiar features were visually traced with new reverence, and the way sunlight hit bare skin was memorized for future reference…
For all that Tsunade and Kakashi might have been content with their silence and the things they found in it, the rest of the world could not be ignored forever.
All too quickly, the sounds of someone whistling in the bath house locker tugged at them both.
Kakashi sighed and straightened, briefly glancing at the bathhouse in irritation. Tsunade raised her chin yet again, putting forth what she'd privately call a heroic effort to keep her gaze from dropping in what would be shameless ogling of her very naked companion.
Kakashi had no such compunctions. It only took a half-second for his eyes to drop well south of her face.
He was perversely pleased that the chunk of paving stone she sent flying at his head appeared to have been slowed down just the teensiest, tiniest bit.
Likewise, Tsunade took a great deal of pride in both the burgeoning crimson beneath the man's nose and his sigh as he once more used shunshin to flee her wrath.
As he disappeared, she ducked her head, hiding her smile.
It was Tuesday.
The sun was shining in Konoha.
And everything was as it should be.
Well, that's it! I want to thank everyone for sticking with me on this story. Your reviews have meant everything and I wouldn't have gotten this far without them. I do have one big apology - I know that I missed standardizing the Japanese honorifics through a lot of this. Sadly, in my head Tsunade is already Tsunade-sama, but Kakashi-san does not flow. Hence, I tend to forget it. I will likely go back and try to edit this to be more consistent and apologize for not doing so from the start.
As for this chapter specifically? It kicked my butt! Trying to keep things realistic in deference to the reserve I think these two would have, but have them reach an understanding, but not indulging in emotion-based conversations that didn't really seem to be their style, but showing enough of what they were thinking so that ya'll could follow it, but….Aiieee! In the end, I hope it hit the mark and brought you all the warm fuzzies it was meant to.
Again – thanks for everything!