Potent Circumstance: A Prism of Delight and Pain
Chapter 3: Cotton Candy Is Good for The Nerves
"We face the path of time... and yet I fight."
- Alice in Chains
Okay. So maybe taking Thor Odinson to a carnival was a bad idea. Maybe it was corny, and desperate, and downright idiotic. But Darcy didn't give many fucks, so she took him right along anyway after she made sure Heimdall had zapped them to a nice-ish one and, of course, that Thor wasn't dressed like the weirdo Space Viking King he was.
She had to pull him away from one of those throw-the-hoop-on-the-bottleneck booths before he destroyed any chances some less-accurate person might have of getting a prize and steered him toward the Rondez-view ferriswheel. She got their tickets punched and climbed in first. Thor stood staring uncertainly.
"Lady Darcy, I do not believe that this small container is adequate..."
"Get your royal ass in here this instant!"
He obeyed.
The technician closed their door and bolted it. The machine started turning, and Darcy grinned at Thor. "Just wait and you'll see why it's worth it."
Thor's answering smile was real but oh so sad. He knew she was trying.
Darcy waited breathlessly as they ascended to the top, where she knew they would stop moving and get a spectacular view of their surroundings. The little lift ground gently to a halt, and Darcy excitedly examined the scenery far below. "Isn't it beautiful?"
Thor said nothing, and Darcy peeked over to see if he had started tearing up on her. He seemed reserved, but appreciative.
On the way back down, Thor quietly thanked her, but Darcy knew he still wasn't really having fun. He was humoring her. She drug him around on ridiculous rides and through the water park, to some silly show and a ferry ride. Through it all, there remained a certain glumness to him. By the time they had seen everything, Darcy was at the end of her rope. Then, she saw cotton candy.
While Thor sulked by the pony ride tent, Darcy got enough for two. "Here."
Thor glanced down, and then his brow furrowed.
"What is the meaning of this...pink cloud mass?"
Darcy had to keep herself from laughing out loud.
"It's called cotton candy. Cotton candy is good for the nerves."
Thor seemed doubtful of her but took some anyway.
His eyes widened. "It disappeared."
Darcy rolled her eyes affectionately. "Yeah, it tends to do that, big guy."
Thor smiled haltingly, which made Darcy smile, too, and gave her courage.
"It is very sweet."
Darcy nodded and started devouring her own. Thor contemplated his before attacking it with gusto. They walked and talked as they ate the treat and licked sticky fingers covered in sugary goodness.
They came upon a movie theatre, and Darcy saw that the cinema featured the new Hobbit movie. She tugged on Thor's sleeve and pointed.
"What is a...Hobbit?" He tipped his head to the side curiously, staring at Bilbo and the others.
"That is," Darcy said plainly, pointing at Bilbo, and explained a few things to him. "So...wanna see it?"
She didn't really give him a real chance to reply, and instead looped her arm through his and steered him through the doors. She hustled him around and mumbled out of the corner of her mouth to him, "Act like you belong and leave the talking to me."
She walked them right into the showing room after reading the signs and settled them in.
"Damn, I should have asked about popcorn. Don't go anywhere."
She sprang up and returned a minute later with a full bucket and a drink, situating them between the two of them. "We're sharing," she announced with finality, and stuck her hand in for a mouthful.
Thor made no comment, and took a careful sip out of the cup so Darcy would have some. The lights turned down and the screen flickered to life. Under her breath, she tried explaining more about the world where Hobbits and wizards lived with dwarves and dragons. Thor liked popcorn too, apparently, and Darcy decided not to take any more after a while. Thor Odinson was a bottomless pit, she thought.
At the end of the showing, Darcy got to her feet, picking up the empty cup and carton. Thor held the door for her and she squeezed through, throwing them in the waste bins. She would love to see a good poetry slam, but didn't know how much more he could take. None of it, she knew, eased his pain very much.
They exited through a side door and came out into a small side street. Thor kept in pace with her.
"Have you anything else planned?" He sounded distracted, and really, she couldn't blame him. A broken heart hurt like a bitch.
"Did you want to do something else?" Thor stopped and extended a hand to her shoulder.
"Darcy," he said, "you are a good friend to have. I apologize."
Darcy hugged him, saying nothing. She started to pull away when a noise caught her attention. She tilted her head and then glanced seriously at Thor. "Did you hear that?"
His eyes were narrowed. "I meant to ask the same thing of you."
He drew her protectively to his side. They turned, scanning the area around them. Darcy was the first to see it.
A small puppy lay trembling, partially hidden by a cardboard box, in an alley across the street from them, curled against an old mattress. Darcy raised a shaking finger, and Thor strode over at once with her at his heels. The small creature peeped up at them dazedly. It was so scrawny it looked painful, and its ear was torn. A once glossy coat looked shaggy and unkempt.
"Give me your jacket, please," Darcy begged Thor. He had already knelt down, and she squatted at his side, easing his jacket around the pup. It whimpered, cringing, but let her wrap the material around it and draw it out.
"I'm sorry for this," Darcy told it, and then quickly checked to see what the sex was. "I wonder how old she is." Darcy looked at Thor. Compassion practically oozed from him.
"Thor, she needs us. She needs someone, at any rate."
Thor extended one of his overly large, powerful hands and gently touched the top of the puppy's head. She whined and leaned her head into his touch. Darcy felt around her neck for a collar and found none. "No collar or tags," she reported, then examined her underside for surgical scars. "She hasn't had her surgeries, either. I wonder if she's ever been taken care of. She's probably from the litter of some stray. And she'll starve or worse if we leave her here."
She met Thor's gaze pleadingly.
"Can I bring her with us back to Asgard?"
Thor answered without any hesitation. "As you wish. She would not need or want for anything."
He helped Darcy stand, cradling the puppy tenderly. It was amazing, how very easy he could be. How did anyone hate this man? She let out a relieved breath. "Well...she needs one thing now."
Thor glanced at her inquisitively. Darcy obliged the unspoken question. "She needs a name, Thor."
Darcy didn't know how long they stood there, only that she jumped when the clock in the square blocks away chimed loudly, and a bell tolled. Finally, tears threatening in his voice, he whispered something that made Darcy gasp, and not in the good way.
"I wish to name her...Frigga."
...xxx...
"You have another passenger." The greeting met them before the man. Heimdall approached and stared down at the bundle in Darcy's arms. Thor gave him a watery smile, and they all sort of dodged mentioning that his eyes were a tad redder than usual, or that his cheeks glistened somewhat.
"Her name is Frigga." His voice didn't waver, and Darcy smiled proudly. He wasn't broken yet.
"I heard the first time." Heimdall smiled kindly at them, gave Darcy a meaningful look of appreciation, and lightly touched Frigga on the ear. His smile faded slightly, and he told them seriously, "Laufey's other sons have come to request they be remanded custody of your brother for his crimes against them." And there it went. The light in his eyes fizzled with news that came like a sucker punch. "Jesus fucking Christ on a cracker," Darcy blurted. "Can they do that?"
Thor straightened angrily. "They shall not. Even if we had him, I would not."
Heimdall grunted. "There will likely be war."
A determined Thor marched off toward Asgard. Darcy threw Heimdall a helpless glance and ran after Thor.
"Thor, please wait!" He slowed, but just barely.
"How dare they," he raged. "After all I have done to make amends, to make peace. After all father did."
"What did Loki even do to them?" Darcy wondered, knowing exactly what he had done on earth from Jane.
"He did much, and half of it was with me. This cannot hold."
Darcy grew quiet. "Would there really be war?" It was such a quiet, more fearful than she had intended, question.
"Possibly," Thor grunted. Darcy felt Little Frigga press herself into Darcy's chest and whine again.
By the time they had reached the actual city, Thor wasn't any calmer. He strode rather forcefully inside, brushing angrily past everyone and ignoring any leering Jotuns they passed by. Darcy scurried in his wake. He threw the doors to the Throne Room open and stormed into it. Sif and the Warriors Three sat around a long meeting table with the blood brothers and a few other officials. Before Thor could even open his mouth, or his friends could convene, Darcy jumped in, suddenly furious, and probably going to regret tossing civility and court manners out of the window. "You inconsiderate mother fucking bastards. You dare come and throw this absolute shit at his feet?"
She swallowed. They eyed her coolly, but she kept her moxie close about her. "No one has time for your temper tantrums. We have more important things to do than validate your fantasies of being poor, helpless, victims when it is damn well known you can't stop seeing blood even when you have your eyes closed. So shut up and get the fuck out and don't you dare try to start a freakin' war."
Sif gasped. Hogun covered his face. Volstagg looked about him gravely. Fandral opened and closed his mouth several times like a fish. The Jotuns radiated indignation.
"What right have you?" One of the Jotuns stood, and Darcy realized that it was a woman.
"Mortal, human, Midgardian woman," the Jotun sneered. "You. Know. Nothing."
Darcy jerked her chin up. "I know bullshit when I see it, and it's flooding out of each one of your pores."
Thor cleared his throat, and Darcy stepped off of her soap box and let him take over. "Lady Darcy may be brash and blunt, but she has a point." Thor paused, then continued. "Our history is long and wrought with disquiet, but your peoples' is much more than that. I mean you no disrespect, but I must ask you to leave. Your request will not be granted or considered. The person in question is one of our citizens and as such-"
One of the other Jotuns had snorted disdainfully when Thor had put that heavy stress on the word. "He is a traitor. All traitor blood is relinquished."
"Asgardian traitors are still Asgardian and will be treated accordingly."
"Like you were, every time you were at fault?" another blue face taunted. Sif stood, drawing her weapon.
"This meeting was to be one of diplomacy. You have been dismissed. I advise you to leave quietly and with dignity and not have to be dragged out by your sorry necks."
There came a very tense moment, and then the party stood, filing one by one out of the door.
"Good luck," the woman called spitefully. "You shall need it if you are not to be bitten by your pet snake."
In a moment, they had gone, an escort signaled by Sif to follow them and clear out any stragglers.
Sif sheathed her weapon and sat, motioning for Thor to join her and their three other confidants. Darcy sat, too, petting Little Frigga.
"Some on Midgard would want to see him suffer, too," Hogun sighed at last. "He has done many things, though none as grievous as the last. I do not question your decision, though, after what we went through with the Dark Elves. He is not all bad."
Sif snorted. "Well," Darcy inserted whimsically, "he's bad, but not evil."
Fandral looked at her oddly.
"What is that little beastie you have there?"
Darcy had forgotten about her. She gently lifted her onto the table, where Little Frigga stared around at them interestedly.
"That is Frigga," Thor said quietly. "Darcy and I found her on the street in Midgard just as we were to return."
His friends stayed silent. Little Frigga's tail wagged and she yipped happily. She bounded somewhat stiffly up to each of them and gave them a playful lick and nudge, and then tripped running to Thor, who she showered with sloppy wet kisses, making contented sounds. He cradled her to his chest. Raising his eyes to theirs, he said matter-of-factly, "Now tell me, friends, what duties I have been neglecting?"
Hesitantly, they began telling him everything, but no one mentioned the sore topic of the missing Jane or his conniving brother.
...xxx...
Jane not only made Loki keep his back turned, but separated him from her by several feet, and absolutely demanded he stay in her line of sight the entire time. She scowled. Freaking jerk actually had a point about it being dangerous to bathe alone, but Jane absolutely would not allow any taking of turns to wash each other. She honestly couldn't believe he had suggested it even jokingly. And it wasn't like the bastard shut the hell up or stopped flirting while they washed, either.
She dunked her head and resurfaced, watching the curve of his back as he washed his own hair. Something rustled in the tree over her head, and she had barely tipped it back to investigate when one of the pine martin creatures landed on her, clinging to her breasts and scrabbling to gain footing on her shoulder. Of course she wanted to scream, terribly so, but terror seized her. "Loki," she called almost brokenly. "Help."
He started to make some snappy remark when she barked irritably, "I'm serious. It's another one of those pine martin things..."
He whipped around. The little creature chattered, and Jane winced as it climbed up onto her shoulder completely, sniffing at her neck.
"Is it the same one?"
"I cannot tell. Pet it anyway. Carefully."
Jane gulped and shakily raised her own hand, feeling along until she found a furry underside. Loki came up and put her hand on the little creature's ear and jaw. She fought down the first rude thing that popped into her head and instead muttered a thanks, petting the odd little beast.
Soon, she heard purring and felt it rub its face against her neck. It craned its neck to stare into her face, and then darted its tongue out, licking her squarely on the chin. She gasped in shock, staring as it jumped down. Right about then, the burning started, a burn that radiated outward and consumed her, followed by a flash of ice-cold that set her off balance.
It felt like her sadness had intensified, magnified a hundred fold. Even the slant of the sun rays made her heart ache, and then her heart opened to accept the weight of what seemed the entire universe. She couldn't breathe; her chest literally felt like it would explode. Loki picked her up and carried her to shore, where she curled in on herself, panting.
"Just let it out Jane." He had leaned down by her ear then. "Let it all go...cry. You have to."
Jane started making strangled, choking sob sounds, but still no tears came, nothing. "Listen to me. You will weep."
He sounded like he meant to kill her. Even that didn't help, but made her despair and fill with melancholy fury. She felt his hand slide up her abdomen, and then she did cry, one, long, wrenching wail as a single tear, enormous and strange, and seemingly impossible, formed, kept forming until an orb big and round enough to fit snugly into a palm fell. Loki caught it and sat back, staring at her tear.
Jane wretchedly crawled over to him and wept normal tears. Speechless, he hesitantly patted her back for consolation.
"It is a wish," he said quietly. "They find someone that has shown them a kindness of some sort and give it to them as a gift. They only have one in their lifetime, and once given they can never give one again. It is your wish to use however you choose, whenever you choose."
Jane quieted somewhat, noticing, perhaps, that he had pulled her into his lap and against his chest, cradling her.
"So that was all for a wish?" she asked weakly. "That was a gift?"
He held up her wish. It looked so strange. She knew it was her tear, but it looked like a very round bubble-shaped crystal, membranous to the touch. "Be careful what you wish for. It may have unforeseen consequences."
"I'll save it," Jane murmured thoughtfully. "It won't break on accident, will it?"
He set his chin on the crown of her head. "No. You have to mean it."
Jane frowned intensely. She cleared her throat several times and tried to think of a way to tell him to get the fuck away in a more polite manner. Seeming to sense her discomfort, which grew exponentially by the second, he leaned away from her. Jane scrambled up and glared when she saw him continuing to stare at her. "Mind. Your. Fucking. Eyes." She narrowed her own balefully. He smirked, rolled his own, and said, "Mind that mouth of yours."
Jane huffed and brushed herself off. She trudged back to the water and started to bathe again. After a moment (probably filled with staring at her bum) he went back as well.
"Thanks for saving my ass," she said after a moment.
He smirked smugly. "Which time?" Jane rolled her eyes. "Both."
He faced her. "Well of course I did. It's one of your appealing features."
Jane had to keep herself from slapping him. "Wish I could say the same about you," she bantered back. His eyes narrowed, and then he splashed her.
"Hey! No fair!" She splashed him back, and soon they had made a game out of it, her laughter filling the air as she temporarily forgot their situation.
...xxx...
Thor sat broodingly, switching his mighty, famed hammer from hand to hand. Little Frigga lay by his feet, dozing peacefully, having been bathed, groomed, fed, and cared for medically. She snuffled contentedly, and he absentmindedly lowered a hand to pet her. He missed mother terribly. He never knew how much he would until she was gone. Not only had Odin favored him, he had practically hogged him. Frigga always loved each of her sons, and gave them both attention. She had always inevitably been so very close to her other son, though. It was ironic, really, that the one person that could possibly comprehend and hurt more than he and father acted as if he despised him. Which, he reflected, wasn't completely and totally uncalled for, as he had been blind and not sober for so very long.
That, of course, didn't change his need to punch his beloved brother in the face (preferably more than once) for again screwing around. Jane had been a step too far. Darcy had told him what she had said to Loki about his wronging of Jane being the biggest blow he could land. She had been correct. Short of mother and his friends, who did he care about nearly as much? He knew his rampant emotions were making him distraught, keeping him from serving his people properly. His depression alone made him want to bludgeon himself with Mjölnir. The Jotuns just kept asking for war, begging to be throttled. Midgard was so fragile...How could he even consider the others when those three alone gave him enough strife?
Frigga perked her ears, getting to her feet and placing her head in Thor's lap. Her eyes seemed almost reproachful, but not unkind. He smiled and scratched her uninjured ear. She hummed and licked his fingers, backing up when he stood suddenly and left the throne room.
She padded beside him dutifully. He would open a room door or touch a wall every so often, smiling nostalgically. Oh, the memories. Mother had read to he and Loki in that study, and he had stolen a kiss from Jane underneath that arch. Sif had played tag with him in that wing...Father had taught him to read just there...There (here he chuckled) he and Jane had been together against that wall. In a garden he glided through like a ghost, he had been taught how to fight. It all felt so reassuring even while his insides swirled in uncertainty.
He eventually stopped on a balcony overlooking a training field for his warriors. Frigga sat at rest, leaning her head against his calf, her weight almost the most reassuring thing of all. All of her innocence had not been tainted by their turmoil and feuding. She didn't take sides, and she didn't seem to be very prone to being angry. She...it pained him as much as pleased him that she lived up to her namesake in a minor way...but he wanted the real thing, and a puppy, even bearing her name, did not another Frigga make.
Someone's shoe scuffed on a stone as they hesitantly shuffled up to him from behind. Without turning, he knew Darcy had come up to stand abreast of him, with Frigga between them. The puppy barked happily in greeting and demanded attention. Darcy spoke to her and picked her up, turning to face Thor.
"Your face looks like someone kicked Frigga and then took a shot at you. Stewing in your own negativity?"
Thor graced her with a soft upturning of his lips. She never did hit too far off, their Darcy. At least she hadn't told him he looked like hell; he knew she had been thinking it. Jane had pointed out that particular judgment look of hers for him one day after she had been sick, and, she said, disgusting, though he thought her beautiful no matter how she looked or what she wore.
"This might seem really inappropriate and out of the blue," Darcy began, which made him stare at her in a very un-Thor-ish way, "but could you maybe give me a dancing lesson some time when all of this is over? Like...I don't even have two left feet. I have like, I dunno what expression to use."
Baffled, Thor opened and then closed his mouth. That was a new one. Darcy, on her part, turned red in embarrassment. "Right then. I'll just..."
She put Frigga down, who protested, and started to leave when Thor stopped her with a hand on her elbow. "Now, Darcy?"
Darcy squirmed. She didn't really think it through, but felt she didn't have an abundance of people to ask anyway. She nodded, and Frigga cocked her head as she watched the two.
Thor set about positioning their arms and hands correctly. Darcy bit her lip and hoped she wouldn't make too much of a fool of herself. She tried following Thor's lead, and only tripped over his feet twice, and, thankfully, didn't step on them (not that he would have said anything). Frigga got to her paws and pranced around the room, watching them. Thor was very patient, and a good dancer. Or it at least seemed that way to Darcy. She meant to tell him so when she accidentally tripped backwards. Thor caught her and brought her closer for inspection.
"Are you well, Darcy?" He bent his head over her and turned her face this way and that.
Darcy had the indescribable and frightening urge to kiss him dammit. And of course, being an impulsive idiot, she did, just a chaste little peck. It was enough to make her slither out of his grasp and flee before he could question her, though. Frigga barked a farewell, and a confused Thor stared after her.