A/N: A few things:

Firstly, the headcannon about dragons and sea serpents comes courtesy of The Antic Repartee, or, as I know her from Tumblr, Avannak. Thanks for the lovely headcannon, dear!

Secondly: This story started as a complete crack fic, but the plot has leaped from my hands and ran away into a long, drawn out who-knows-what-to-call-it. But now, I've finally figured out how it's going to end. I can't give it away, obviously, but I'm just going to stick in a disclaimer here that now you might want to gear up for some angst when this story starts to wrap up.

Just letting you know in case you need to jump ship. But that's chapters away! First we need some more bonding and some answers!

Hiccup and Toothless had been invited to the Hofferson's for dinner. Eating with Astrid's family actually wasn't out of the ordinary for Hiccup. When the trend first started, Stoick would come as well, but these days it'd devolved into a more casual setting, where Hiccup would come whenever Lady Hofferson invited him, and eat whatever food she offered him. Years ago, when it'd begun, Hiccup hadn't understood why they would want him over for dinner, because it just wasn't something you did outside of the mead hall. But as he grew older, as he began to look slightly beyond the next few months, years, in his relationship with Astrid, he suddenly realized why her parents were keen on seeing more of him. It made him blush and stutter and fidget whenever he thought about it, so he made himself think it was just a nice friendly visit that had nothing to do with the future.

But he didn't even have to try to tell himself that this time, because Toothless was there, and his presence kept Hiccup's mind too occupied to stray toward awkward thoughts.

He'd spent half an hour correcting Toothless' wardrobe before they left. Hiccup found he didn't mind anymore when he had to redress Toothless – if anything, he didn't mind because he couldn't mind, because Toothless was so hopeless with clothes. Earlier in the day, Hiccup had even gotten Toothless to bathe, which he'd desperately needed.

It'd been awkward because Hiccup had to help, but hilarious as well, because Toothless looked like he wanted stay in the tub forever, and wouldn't stop going on about how absolutely wonderful water felt through human skin. He'd splashed around in the tub like a toddler long after he was clean, but then his skin started wrinkling up, he panicked, and flew out of the bath before Hiccup could find a towel. After he got the dragon somewhat dry and decent enough to shove out of the bathroom, Hiccup (already soaked in water and suds from Toothless's flight) decided he might as well bathe, too.

When he reemerged, Toothless was lying shirtless on the floor of their bedroom, his hair in a fuzzy, puffy ball around his head. He was running his fingers through it, marveling.

"It's so soft," he told Hiccup as the other boy got dressed, "I used to think you humans were strange for keeping all this unnecessary fur," he said, stroking his own head. Hiccup didn't bother to correct the 'fur' comment. "But now I understand completely." He tried to nuzzle his own locks, which made Hiccup giggle quietly.

"Alright, Lord Softie, come sit up here before you get it tangled." Hiccup made him sit on the edge of the bed while he combed out his hair. Toothless began to nod off in the sensation of it, and looked sleepy and dazed by the time Hiccup was done.

"Ohhh," he whined when Hiccup stepped away, and looked down at the comb somewhat longingly.

"Don't touch it," Hiccup threatened, and threw Toothless' tunic and belt at him. "We're supposed to be there soon."

He had to reminded Toothless which way 'round the tunic went, and had to straighten his trousers, and adjust his belt, and they'd actually left and had to return shortly when Hiccup realized Toothless hadn't put on any boots. But eventually, they arrived at the Hofferson household, clean, hungry, and smiling at their hosts.

"Toothless!" Astrid welcomed from behind her mother at the door, "I'd wondered if you'd come." He beamed at her and waved as they stepped through the door.

Astrid's mother was a strong, beautiful Viking woman, much larger and bulkier than her daughter, but dignified and imposing. She was also a wonderful cook. She finished up dinner while Hiccup, Astrid, and Toothless stood talking. Astrid's father watched them quietly. He was a strong man, but slighter in build, half because of genetics, half because he hadn't fought in years. He'd lost his dominant right arm in a raid some years ago, and had since become accustomed to a more laid-back lifestyle. He wasn't an intellectual, but he'd learned to appreciate brains more, now that his own brawn was hampered. He held a special fondness for Hiccup, and not only because he saw how his daughter loved him.

"So," Mr. Hofferson asked, "Toothless, I have to ask how being human is suiting you."

"Sven!" Mrs. Hofferson burst, but her husband waved her off.

"Oh, it's fine, Ingrid, I'm sure the boy –er, dragon, that is, has been asked enough."

"It is… very different." Toothless told him. "But not bad, really."

"And have you found a way to change back?" Sven was being curious, not condescending.

Toothless and Hiccup shared a look. Astrid looked serious. "No," Hiccup said for them, "But we're working on it."

A few minutes later, dinner was served. Hiccup ate politely around Astrid's parents and joked with her about dragons, and training, and his inventions. Sven always seemed curious about Hiccup's inventions, so he explained his projects with enthusiasm. It was after Astrid begun to tell her parents about her day at the ring when Hiccup realized that Toothless hadn't touched his dinner.

"Toothless, you okay?" He whispered so as not to interrupt Astrid.

Toothless was frowning, and looking down his nose at the stew sat in front of him. "I don't like it," He confessed in Dragonese, so their hosts wouldn't hear.

"Why not?"

Toothless looked at Hiccup sidelong. "Sy æl," he muttered.

"What?"

"I said, it's eel."

Hiccup looked down at his own stew. He had actually noticed, and no, it wasn't his favorite, but spices did wonders to mask the rubbery taste of eel. He sighed and glared over at Toothless. He switched his whispering to Dragonese so they wouldn't offend Mrs. Hofferson's cooking out loud.

"Tóðléas, it's in a stew. It won't kill you. I hate eel too, and it tastes fine - good, even."

"No. You do not understand."

"Toothless, please, just eat the stupid stew."

"I will not," He said stubbornly, "I do not care if this human body will like it or not. I am a dragon, and I will not."

Hiccup actually rolled his eyes. "You are ridiculous," he spat.

"Spawn of the sea serpents."

"What?"

"Eels come from sea serpents. Sea serpents are scum, devils from the oceans, who enjoy tormenting my kind and generally being disgusting, creepy, nasty imbeciles." He definitely sounded like someone with a grudge.

"Well then," Hiccup said pleasantly, gesturing to the stew, "Have your revenge."

Toothless grumbled and used such a colorful Dragonese curse that it made Hiccup's eyebrows shoot up. "Tóðléas!" He hissed, but Toothless only glowered. The Viking shoved a spoon towards the fury. "Eat it," he said.

"No." Toothless cross his arms. "It smells horrible. Like eel slime and sea silt."

"I know you can't smell that, because I can't, and you yourself said that the human sense of smell isn't-"

"Well mine is, so stop trying to convince me otherwise."

"Toothless, so help me, stop being so rude and just eat the damn-"

Astrid cleared her throat, loudly.

Hiccup and Toothless turned to see the Hofferson family staring at them. It looked as though they'd been watching them bicker in Dragonese for a while. Hiccup lowered the spoon and blushed. Toothless still glowered, arms crossed, but had the grace to look guilty.

"Something wrong, boys?" Sven asked, a hint of humor in his voice.

"Um," Hiccup drummed his fingers on the edge of the table, and glanced at the stew. An awkward moment passed before he said, "The stew, Mrs. Hofferson," Hiccup glanced at Toothless and then back up at the Hoffersons. "…it's eel, isn't it?"

The Hoffersons stared silently for a moment, but then Astrid snorted, and bust out laughing. Mrs. Hofferson put a hand to her mouth, realizing the mistake. Sven grinned.

"Oh, I am… I am so sorry," Ingrid looked embarrassed and amused. "I completely, that is, I forgot, Toothless, I'm sorry," Ingrid was one of the villagers who'd been very wary around Toothless, but in the moment, she could only laugh. "A-Astrid, would you mind…?"

"Don't worry, Toothless," Astrid said, rising, "I'll find you something." She rose and jogged to the kitchen.

"That's an interesting little code you have there," Sven said, sipping at his mead,

"What?" Hiccup asked.

"You two were rattlin' off in some strange gibbrish, just now," Sven clarified, and Hiccup blushed redder, because once they'd switched to Dragonese, he'd actually forgotten.

"O-oh. Yeah. Um, it's, uh, Dragonese. The language of the dragons." Hiccup glanced at Toothless. "He's teaching me."

Ingrid looked wary, but Sven's eyebrows lifted in interest. "Really? You can understand them, then, dragons?"

"Um, yeah, well, sorta." Hiccup was wringing his hands. "I mean, dragon dragons are harder to understand, and… well, I'm still learning."

"He is more fluent that he lets on," Toothless cut in, his voice ringing with quiet pride, "we're all very impressed with him."

Hiccup looked surprised, because Toothless had never told him that. He glanced at his friend, who smiled.

"Alright," Astrid reappeared with a tray of smoked meats, breads, and cheeses, "It's nothing special, but it's not eel." She set a new plate in front of Toothless, who tucked in gratefully. Contrary to what Hiccup thought, Toothless was beginning to understand human manners and etiquette, so halfway through eating his improvised dinner, he made it up to Mrs. Hofferson by asking nicely, "Mrs. Hofferson?"

"Yes?"

"Did you bake this bread?"

"Yes I did, this morning," She told him.

"It's incredibly good," He told her sincerely. She thanked him, and he paused and looked at Hiccup. "Much better than anything Hiccup makes, anyway." His eyes twinkled with a joke, and Astrid cackled at Hiccup's expense.

"Thanks, bud," Hiccup put in sarcastically.

Toothless smiled, one cheek full of bread.

After dinner, Astrid walked with the boys back to the Haddock house. As they did every time this happened, Astrid and Hiccup both pretended not to know that the Hofferson parents were spying on them from a crack in the door.

"What do they want to see?" Hiccup had asked her the first time she told him they were watching.

"Well," Astrid took his hand, "never mention it in public unless you want to be killed painfully, but my mother is a complete sop on the inside," she'd told him.

"…So?"

"So she spies on us to see if we'll do something like this,"

"If we'll do something like wh-" but Hiccup had been cut off because she'd kissed him. It was brief enough for him to not die of embarrassment, but intimate enough that he would be beat red for the rest of the night.

"Astrid," He'd whispered, slightly panicked, "your parents are watching," he hissed uncomfortably. She'd smirked at him.

"Exactly," she'd wrapped her fingers around his. They walked a few more paces before he sighed.

"Well, in that case," He wrapped his arm around her waist. Hiccup didn't have the ears for it, but Astrid would recognize her mother's voice anywhere, even squeaking girlishly as it was.

"I told you, Sven! I told you'd they'd-"

"Shh! Ingrid, for Thor's sake, get away from the door before they hear you."

Too late.

But now, if her parents were watching, they were watching Toothless, too, so Astrid didn't feel compelled to give them a show. Still, she did intertwine her fingers with Hiccup's and let their hands swing between them as they walked. Toothless saw the gesture and squinted at both of them, at Hiccup's goofy smile and that one look that Astrid used only around Hiccup. Eventually, the dragon rolled his eyes and shook his head softly. They didn't make much conversation on the way back, but somewhere along the way, Toothless had grown somewhat frustrated with the two lovebirds next to him.

"I wish you two would just mate already," He grumbled aloud in Dragonese. Hiccup whirled on him, mortified.

"Toothless!"

"What?" Toothless exclaimed in Norse. Astrid looked confused.

"What? What'd he say?" She asked.

"Nothing," Hiccup blurted, making it sound like anything but 'nothing'. He glared at Toothless. "I can't believe you," he spat in Dragonese.

Toothless smiled, but decided to stay quiet. When they reached the door of the house, Hiccup and Astrid stopped, and Toothless realized they were probably going to have a moment. He didn't try to hide his smirk.

"Goodnight, Astrid," He smiled at her, and turned a vaguely suggestive look at Hiccup. "I'll leave you alone with úre æfenhlytta," Dragonese floating suavely from his mouth. Hiccup fumed, but the anger was ruined by the horrible blush visible in his ears.

"Toohless!"

The dragon cackled and snuck into the house.

Astrid turned to him. "What did he call me?" She asked. Hiccup only shook his head. But he was blushing, and she wasn't stupid – she could guess. She had to smile, knowing that she could make him blush like that. "Well whatever it was, you don't have to be embarrassed, you know."

Hiccup sent her an I extremely doubt that look, and she laughed.

"How do you do that, anyway? Speak Dragonese?"

The change in topic made him frown for a beat. "I… I'm not sure what you mean – Toothless is teaching me, and the other dragons."

"I mean, how do you say Dragonese words?" When she saw that he didn't understand, she sighed and explained, "I've listened to you and Toothless go back and forth. I can sometimes understand a word or two here and there, but…" She shrugged. "I can never say the words myself. I've tried, but… I can't pronounce them right, much less understand them when a real dragon says them." Hiccup hadn't known any of this, so he wasn't sure how to respond. Astrid looked at him, proud but also jealous, "you have a real gift, Hiccup. It's not just something you're learning. I don't know… it's like…" she shrugged. "Something else." She regarded him a moment more, and shook her head with a chuckle. "Not that I should be surprised, dragon boy."

"Well," Hiccup shrugged, suddenly self-conscious. "I'm just trying to learn before… well, before he turns back," He told her. "I don't want to forget, after all this." She nodded at him.

"You won't. And maybe one day you can teach me. Even if it takes a long time."

He smiled at her, the dopey smile that he kept for her only. "I'd like that," he said.

"Okay," she smiled back, uncharacteristically shy in the moment. She leaned over and kissed him, longer and closer now that her parents weren't watching. He closed his eyes and wondered, as he often did, if he would ever actually get used to this.

When he made it to his room, he was still smiling, and thoroughly, happily dazed. Toothless made a monumental effort, and managed to not say anything.

Toothless could feel his consciousness swimming away from him, right on the cusp of dreams (and humans had shockingly vivid dreams, he'd learned) when Hiccup unexpectedly startled him awake again.

"So, do sea serpents really exist?" the Viking asked.

Toothless frowned, annoyed to be woken up and even more annoyed that he'd been woken up so that Hiccup could ask him about sea serpents. "Yes," he said, and prayed against reason that Hiccup would leave it at that.

"…So what do they look like?"

"Ugh," Toothless tossed himself over in bed, trying to get comfortable despite the massive grimace on his face. "I thought you'd drifted off to thoughts of you æfenhlytta by now," he grumbled, "how in skies did you get around to thinking about sea serpents?"

"Well, I was thinking about Astrid," Hiccup confessed, "so I was thinking about this evening with her, and then back to dinner, and then how you didn't eat the dinner, and why, and – I was just curious, is all, I've never heard of sea serpents before you mentioned it tonight… wanted to know more about them, I suppose…"

In the dark, Toothless rolled his eyes. Hiccup was rambling, as he tended to when he was very sleepy and didn't want to admit it. Toothless usually didn't begrudge staying up talking with Hiccup. But not about this. "Yes, they exist. They live in the sea, they're huge, disgusting, foul-smelling, ridiculous creatures with no sense of decency and no love for dragons." He huffed. "Now go back to sleep."

"…When you say big, how big do you mean?"

"I don't know, Gicpa, I've only ever seen one once."

"And you hate them that much?"

"Of course, all dragons do, our species have warred for centuries."

"But… If you've been warring for centuries, how come you've only ever seen one? Not much of a war, is it?"

"Long-standing rivalry, then."

"Over what?"

"…hating each other."

"Hating each other over what?"

"Because… oh, just go to sleep, Gicpa."

A long silence followed, and for a wonderful moment, Toothless thought the human had fallen asleep, then,

"…You think there're any sea serpents around Berk, Toothless?"

"If there are, I wouldn't care to know," Toothless growled.

"But how would you know? I mean, if there are any."

"Well, they like underwater caves, from what I understand, so probably somewhere deep, beneath rocky cliffs or the like." He didn't know why he was telling Hiccup all of this.

"Oh. Okay." Hiccup's sudden, cheery dismissal made Toothless frown to himself. It wasn't like Hiccup to stop asking questions, especially once he was on a roll. He never stopped asking questions until he found the answer he wanted, or at least one that could set him on the right track.

Oh.

Toothless sat up straight in bed. "Gicpa, I hope you are not thinking what I think you are thinking, and if you are, I need to tell you right now, that I will not be taking you out hunting for sea serpents any time ever in the future."

"Oh, come on, Toothless!" Hiccup threw his arms out dramatically. "We don't have to go near one, I just want to see one!"

"Seeing one is going near to one."

"Just close enough to sketch it, get some specs, you know, for Fishlegs and the manual."

"That is much too close and – I'm sorry, you don't mean the dragon manual? Sea serpents are in no way dragons! You can't put them in there, too!"

"What about scauldrons or thunderdrums?" Hiccup asked.

"They are completely different! Just because they happen to live in the ocean doesn't mean they have anything in common with-"

"Do they understand Dragonese?" Hiccup cut in.

"What?"

"Sea serpents. Do they understand Dragonese?" He repeated. Toothless sputtered indignantly.

"Do they- I don't know! I wouldn't expect so, but I wouldn't know, because - and I believe I've already said this – I've only seen one once and I wasn't exactly chatting it up, repulsed as I was."

"I wonder if they find you just as repulsive," Hiccup wondered aloud. Toothless felt a miniscule rush of guilt that manifested as annoyance.

"I am not taking you serpent fishing."

And that settled it, for a few quiet seconds.

"So much for going wherever we want to go and doing stupid and reckless things," Hiccup grumbled. Toothless only rolled his eyes.

"Gicpa, I will go with you to the world's end and back, across every ocean in the world, if you like," Toothless said honestly, "But if we ever happen upon a sea serpent, I will not be stopping so you can make charcoal pictures of it. I will find a way to turn my tail in the other direction, and I will fly away as quick as the winds allow." He fidgeted into his blankets and closed his eyes, determined to make this conversation end soon.

"Oh, you big baby. One day, we'll find a sea serpent, and I'll make you say hello." Toothless could hear Hiccup smiling.

"You will not," Toothless growled, not smiling, but not truly mad.

"Mmmhmm," Hiccup offered sarcastically. Their bickering died out, and they both floated off toward sleep in their beds. "I'll find one eventually," Hiccup mumbled.

"And I'll be there to yell at you for it," Toothless told him.

"And I don't think I'll listen."

"You never do, Saddle Jumper."

Hiccup laughed sleepily. "With wings," he said.

"What?" Toothless asked, confused and, for some reason, alarmed.

But Hiccup had fallen asleep.

Hiccup awoke at an unholy hour because Toothless was shaking his shoulder. It wasn't even light outside, Hiccup wanted to protest, but Toothless looked urgent.

"Wake up," he hissed, still shaking.

"What, what?" Hiccup batted his hands away, "I'm up, what's wrong?"

"The Kindleline," Toothless told him, eyes bright with anticipation and nervousness, "they've answered our call."

The news jolted Hiccup fully awake. Before he could ask any questions, Toothless told him, "Stormfly's just come by to tell me, there's a messenger waiting behind the arena."

Hiccup didn't say anything. He threw off his covers, fumbled into his prosthetic, and jumped out of bed.

A/N:

úre - your

æfenhlytta - mate; consort