Kakashi awoke with the distinct feeling of being watched. Cracking open his eye, he found himself to be justified in this. Pakkun's weight pressed down on his stomach, and the pug quickly turned to him, seeing that he was awake.

"You there, kid?"

"'M not a kid," he mumbled.

"You're totally a kid. Hey, guys!" Pakkun barked, "He's awake, and I'm pretty sure he's sentient!"

There was a flurry of activity, a head of spiky blond hair picking itself up from the floor, and a pink head lifting itself from where it was resting on a desk. "Sensei?" They were suddenly leaning over him, concerned expressions on their faces. "How are you feeling?"

"When did you guys get here?"

"Couple hours ago," Naruto said. "Why did you go to Sasuke's house, anyway?"

"How are you feeling? How many fingers am I holding up?" Sakura interjected.

"I was running from Gai, fine, and three," he replied, coughing.

"You're not fine, Baka-sensei, stop saying that!"

"If you were just going to contradict my answer, why did you ask? And I am fine, thank you. I no longer feel like my brain is exploding inside my skull, and the world has stopped spinning faster than it should. That counts as fine in my book."

"If you felt that bad, why didn't you tell someone?"

"I can take care of myself."

Pakkun gave a loud snort.

"Shut up." He narrowed his one eye.

"Pakkun's got a point, sensei," Sakura said.

"Got a point? All he did was snort!"

"It's the spirit of the thing. What would have happened if we hadn't gotten here?"

"I had Pakkun; I was fine."

Sakura put a hand on his forehead. "Fine or not, you've still got a fever. I'll go see if I can find you some medicine. Since you're actually awake now, we might be able to use that method instead of medical ninjutsu." Her thumb slid across his forehead as she brought her hand back down to her side. Turning, she walked quietly out of the room.

"I'll get some water!" Naruto chased after her.

"Don't spill it, dobe!" she yelled.

"You really scared them, you know," Pakkun said, resolutely sitting on Kakashi's stomach.

Kakashi sighed. "I know," he muttered, coughing. "I didn't mean for it to get this bad, honestly."

"Well, you didn't really do anything to keep it from getting this bad, did you?"

He didn't answer.

"See, that's the thing with you. You're willing to risk your life for others, you know a million and one ways to get out of any given situation on the battlefield, you can memorize a bajillion jutsu-"

"Bajillion's not actually a number," he mumbled hoarsely, trying to steer the dog away from the subject matter at hand.

"But when it comes to yourself, you're either clueless, or you just don't-" He stopped, and lowered his voice. "Sometimes, I think you honestly don't care about yourself."

"This has nothing to do with me caring about myself!"

Sakura walked back into the room. "I found some medi-"

"Would you mind going back to the kitchen for a minute?" Pakkun interrupted her. "And keep Naruto there, while you're at it."

"Don't listen to him," Kakashi said, waving a hand lazily. "It's fine, you can-"

"I said back to the kitchen, Sakura," Pakkun growled. "Kakashi doesn't know what he's talking about."

She turned around again, having learned her lesson about listening to Pakkun. "I'll just go help Naruto clean up the pitcher of water he spilled; it's no big deal." Quickly, she walked back out of the room, closing the door behind her.

"Why did you do that?"

"Because you and I need to have a serious talk. I meant what I just said; sometimes you make it look like you couldn't care less about your wellbeing."

"I don't have problems with 'self-worth,' if that's what you're getting at; I just got sick, Pakkun!"

"Yeah, but you got sick and went to the memorial stone in the rain and went to Ichiraku and led Gai on a village-wide goose chase and only called me to help when you were delirious and wanted ramen. You refused to turn to anyone for help. If you hadn't summoned me in your delirium, if Naruto and Sakura hadn't found you, who knows how bad it might have gotten?"

He crossed his arms, saying nothing.

"Why? Why do you always insist on not taking care of yourself? It's like you don't care about yourself. Sometimes, it's almost like you don't think… you don't think you're worth the effort."

Kakashi remained silent.

"Well?" the pug pressed.

His next words were so quiet that Pakkun almost didn't catch them. "I'm not."

"That's a load of bullcrap!"

"No, I mean it!" he said, slightly louder this time. "I'm not worth the effort. Do you know how many people I've killed? Yes, I'm the man who mastered a thousand jutsu, but I murdered people for at least three quarters of those jutsu. I've torn apart families; I've even killed children. I'm lazy, I'm perverted, I'm unstable, and I'm dangerous," he finished coldly. "So no, I'm not worth the effort. It's not like it's a tragedy or anything, it's just a fact of life. I've accepted it; it's fine."

"It is not fine! Who in this village hasn't killed someone and regretted it? For every person you've killed, I guarantee there are two you've saved."

"It doesn't change the fact that all those people di- that I killed them."

"Kakashi-kun, our society is made up almost exclusively of murderers," the pug began, and undercurrent of anger lacing his voice. "You killed those people because you were ordered to, and if you hadn't killed most of them, things would've gotten a lot worse for Konoha. I know that doesn't change the outcome, but at least you did it for a reason. And you know what? You are definitely the most lazy, perverted, unstable, and dangerous person I know, but do you honestly think that matters? Hmm, let's see…" He tilted his head. "No! No, it doesn't! And you may not care about yourself, but I care! And so does Sakura. And Naruto. And Gai. And Tsunade. And don't you dare forget that, you idiot!"

Kakashi was dumbstruck for a few moments. He cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. "That… was quite a speech."

"Did it at least sink in a bit?"

"I, uh, yeah. I've… been acting like a bit of an idiot, haven't I?"

"A bit? Just a lot, kid."

"Pakkun… I'm sorry."

"It's alright, Kakashi-kun." There was a pause. "You're gonna do the exact same thing the next time you're sick, aren't you?"

"You know what they say about old habits." He winked. "I might summon you a bit earlier next time. I'll try, anyway."

"That's all I'm asking for. Just… would you mind remembering what I said? So I don't have to say it again?"

"Or what? You'll say it all again, this time inserting more awkward pauses?"

"Nope. I'll kill you before you have a chance to do it yourself."

Kakashi chuckled warmly. "That sounds more like you than all this emotional stuff."

"I'm not joking. I seriously will kill you."

"Well, I'd better commit this to memory, then. It'd be embarrassing to be killed by a dog after surviving so many rogue nin."

"Oh, shut up! It'd be an honor to be killed by a great summon such as myself."

"Sure, you keep telling yourself that…"

Pakkun jumped off Kakashi's stomach and landed lightly on the floor. "Sakura!" he called, padding towards the door, "You can come back in now!"

Footsteps approached the room, and Sakura and Naruto walked in. "We heard shouting," she said. "Is everything alright?"

"Perfectly alright," Kakashi replied, sitting up slightly to grab the glass of water Naruto was holding. His hands shook, but he felt warmer inside than he had in quite a while.

So, I suck. Did I really leave this without an update for several months? Time flies when you're finishing up the school year, I guess. Comments are welcome! There will probably be one or two more chapters after this (hopefully with less of a gap in between, but we'll see…)

Also, in reply to Prescripto13 who brought up a good point last chapter: You're perfectly right. I was going back and forth for quite a while deciding whether Sakura and Naruto should stay or go, and I only made them stay because I felt that Sakura would be too worried about Kakashi to leave him at that point, and by the time she might have overcome that, he probably would've already started talking. However, I may decide to go back and change that part, but for now, we're keeping it as it is. Thanks for your review!

~JillianWatson1058