Once Upon a December
Chapter 11
Outside the window the station man were loading the last suitcases onto the train and the people on the platform were waving with grand enthusiasm as the train finally started moving. Violet kept her eyes on the scenery outside, as Edith was going on endlessly about Marigold. There wasn't much conversation going on in their carriage, as everyone seemed deep in their own thoughts. Violet felt an overwhelming urge to close her eyes, but knew that if she did she would fall asleep, and she wasn't about to be one of those grandmothers. She hadn't got much sleep the night before, but nobody knew that of course. A tiny smile crept to her face as she thought back on the night, which was the first night in almost 30 years she hadn't spent alone. She thought of how he had slipped into her room and closed the door gently behind him. He had approached her with determination and touched her waist, all the while she hadn't dared to move an inch. He had kissed her softly, as if trying not to hurt her. She had finally overcome her restrictions and had reached up to touch his cheek and he had deepened the kiss. Everything from there was haze of images floating through Violet's memory. Images of bodies moving desperately against each other, of breaths growing faster and names being sighed into ears. She remembered how he had pushed her gently back onto the bed, all the while kissing her and when she had objected slightly, letting the aching of her hip be known, he had traced his kisses downwards, in order to let her know he would take care of her. He knew what her every moan meant, and saw to it, that the night would be as special to her as it was to him. And it had indeed been special to both of them. Violet let out a heavy sigh in the train and Mary shot her eyes in her direction. "What is the matter, Granny?" she asked, eyebrows raised in concern "Oh nothing. Train rides are always so tedious" Violet replied, gave her a small smile and returned her gaze out the window. She expected the journey to feel a good deal longer than usual this time, and the fact that Mary had probably noticed her flaming cheeks didn't help. The awkwardness of the situation was broken by Edith "I wonder if Nanny remembers that Marigold doesn't like eggs?" - "Oh for heaven sakes!" Mary exclaimed and Isobel sent Violet a knowing smile. The key is to divert the conversation, Violet thought to herself and finally let herself close her eyes for just a minute.
When she arrived in her room in Grantham House that night, Denker had of course already unpacked everything, and since she had been coming her for most of her life, Grantham House was now quite familiar and almost homelike to her. She pulled off her gloves and then sat down at the dressing table. Denker should be here, she thought, but the fact that she was late didn't really bother her as much as it might have done before. She looked at her reflection and blushed again. Then she took off her earrings and placed them in her jewellery box in front of her. Her mind started to wander again, she found it hard to focus her thoughts on the present, as all she could really think about was to get this wedding over with and get back home. She wondered if by home she meant Downton or if home to her had become, or had always been, his arms. She was pulled out of her thoughts as Denker entered the room "I'm so sorry I'm late My Lady" she said and headed straight for her task of undressing her mistress. "Yes, it ought not to be repeated" Violet responded not intending to let Denker know of her carelessness. Denker untied her hair carefully, neither women saying a word as she did so. When her hair was finally free of all the pins she brushed it gently, finally looking Violet in the eye in the mirror. The look that met her was unexpected "Are you quite well, My Lady?" she asked as she paused her brushing. "Quite! Why do you ask?" Violet regretted the question instantly but couldn't help anticipating Denker's response. There was something about her, maybe their shared wit, which made her wonder if she could for once talk to someone about all of this commotion. "You seemed a bit distraught for a moment. I hope the evening has been pleasant?" Violet smiled and shook her head. Perhaps she was wrong in her earlier presumptions. "Oh yes. I'm sure Lady Rose will make up for any trouble Lord Sinderby might bring. Or Lady Flintshire for that matter" She laughed slightly, relieved that for once that she and her family was out of the fire line. Denker looked at her questionably. Violet didn't quite like how, despite their short acquaintance, Denker seemed to look straight through her sarcastic facade. "This haven't got anything to do with the visit of Prince Kuragin last night, My Lady?" She started brushing again. Violet's eyes grew to twice their size and shot back to Denker. Her heart skipped several beats as the panic grew in her chest. For the first time, Denker had brought her to complete speechlessness. "I.. I'm sorry?" She wanted desperately to have a snark remark ready in return, but her mind was completely boggled. "I don't mean to be disrespectful, My Lady, but I did notice.." Violet quickly interrupted her "Then I suggest you don't say another word, Denker!". The silence that followed was almost unbearable, and Violet was sure Denker could hear her heart beating as clearly as she could feel it. Denker however, proved her most straightforward lady's maid to this day as she suddenly said "Your secret is safe with me, My Lady. All I want to say is that I don't blame any woman for listening to their emotions" then she put down the brush and took a step back. Violet was now completely speechless, her mouth open in shock as she stood and let Denker undo her buttons.
The next days of course was all about the preparation of the wedding and enough entertainment were planed to keep Violet's thoughts of Igor at bay. For the most part. While Mary, Edith and Tom had taken Rose out to dine the eve before the wedding, Isobel and Violet had finally some time to indulge in a private conversation. As they sat alone in the library Violet suddenly noticed Isobel's saddened features. "Are you still undecided Isobel?" she asked, careful not to seem prying. "I really don't know if I should fight for him. At my age, is it really worth it?" she asked, trying to seem on top of it all, yet Violet saw the dampness in her eyes, as she reached over to touch her hand. "My dear, you must do what you think best. No matter what that is.", "And you? Have you talked to the Prince lately?" Violet withdrew her hand, attempting to fiddle with her wedding ring, only to find out to her horror, that she wasn't wearing it. She had forgotten to put it on again. Isobel being as observant as always, noticed the horror in Violet's eyes and her eyes shot down to her hands. "Have you taken off your ring?" she asked, regretting the far too direct question instantly. "I'm sorry, that is of course non of my business" Violet held out her hand "Don't. I know what you're thinking. The truth is… I have forgotten it at home". Isobel's eyebrows rose sceptically. "I presume you took it off for a good reason?" Violet blushed again. She couldn't control it, she had nothing to say in her defence. "I hope we can keep this between ourselves" she answered and Isobel nodded understandingly. "I will say this. I have come to realise that I have been given a final chance of true happiness, and I have a feeling I will regret it bitterly if I let it slip by" Isobel looked at her intriguingly "And you weren't happy before?" Violet thought carefully before answering; "The happiest I've ever been, Isobel, was when I was in Russia 50 years ago." She couldn't say anymore and Isobel knew this, so she simply nodded her head and directed her gaze to the fireplace. They sat like that in silence for quite a while before they decided to retire. No matter what was to happen, Violet felt a wave of comfort flow through her when she thought of the alliance she had found in Cousin Isobel.
The wedding was of course not totally without drama, but despise Susan's outburst and the cruel prank that had almost stopped it all before it began, it had come through and the blessing afterwards was a joyous occasion. Violet had enjoyed shocking most of the guests by not being shocked at all by the controversial wedding and as the evening drew closer, she got a minute to talk to Shrimpie alone. "Aunt Violet, she's found" Violet looked at him questionably "Who's found?", "You're friend. The Russian Princess. She's on her way from Hong Kong as we speak. I can't say when she'll be arriving though, alas the travel conditions of refugees at these times are mildly speaking questionable" Violet didn't know what to say. Her mind was spinning. The Princess. She had almost forgotten she had started the search. "Aunt Violet, are you quite alright?" her eyes shot to his and she put on her deceiving smile "Yes. Thank you Shrimpie" He smiled at her, presumably proud of his achievement, and then walked away. Violet stood alone looking at the party guests happily joined in conversation, but her mind was on how she would spring this to Igor and indeed how her situation had now suddenly changed. Perhaps this was for the best, she thought. She had been living in a dream the last few days and behaved like a silly school girl. This was a firm reminder, that it was time to be realistic. The only problem was that even though she found it hard to amid this, even to herself, she preferred the dream.