Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Suggested Listening: "A Pound of Flesh" by Radical Face
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Bella's heart pounded the second her feet hit the sand of First Beach.
There was no ignoring the throbbing in her chest, a part of Bella reminding herself not to squeeze the tiny hand she held in hers too tightly. Another part of her thankful for that tiny hand, attached to the tiny body and the tiny legs that forced them both to move much slower than normal.
Buying her some time - to find her strength. To remember why she had thought this was a good idea.
To come up with some kind of a plan to make it through this night.
From where they stood, she could see everyone. Jacob's father, Billy, was pushed up to the bonfire in his wheelchair. She could see Sue Clearwater and Quil's mom, Joy, sitting next to him on one of the logs arranged around the fire pit. Flames were already reaching for the sky, licking and popping against the kindling. Bella saw Emily, Kim, Rachel, and Anna on the opposite side of the fire, lost in some conversation all their own.
Letting her eyes wander farther down the beach, drawing closer to the shoreline, Bella could see the pack.
They were playing soccer - the same game they always played before a bonfire. Passing time before they were required to pull in, take a seat, and listen to Billy retell the legends of the tribe. From what she could see, Jacob, Seth, Leah, and Collin were on one team. Paul, Jared, Sam, and Brady were on the other. Bella caught smiles. Laughter.
To an outsider, absolutely nothing looked out of place.
Bella's feet kept moving, even though her breath caught in her throat when she heard a quiet rustling next to her. When she turned her head, wide eyes found Quil already watching her, moving so silently beside her she had almost forgot he was there. Forgetting that he somehow ended up riding with them to the beach.
Quil tightened his grip on the pile of blankets and jackets he carried.
"You okay?" There was hesitance in his eyes.
Swallowing thickly, Bella looked away. Glancing down to her other side, her gaze landed on Maddie silently walking beside her, fingers tucked in her mouth.
"I don't know yet," Bella whispered earnestly, not entirely sure Quil would hear the words over the sound of the ocean several yards away. As she bent forward, never missing a step as she hoisted Maddie into her arms, propping the little girl against her hip. Feeling her pace naturally quicken the moment she was secure against her body.
It was still hard for her to say any more, but when she peered at Quil out of the corner of her eye, the tightness of his jaw - his gaze burning into the sand - confirmed he understood.
"If it gets to be too much...just say the word," Quil finally replied, resolute eyes finding hers one last time. Holding them until she nodded in agreement.
FInally reaching the bonfire, Bella and Maddie were swept up in a barrage of hugs from the women she'd seen before. Ignoring the glints of cautious sympathy she could still see lingering in their expressions, the traces of their own sadness still resting somewhere in kind eyes, Bella did what she could to push back the dread. To smile.
Still holding Maddie, Bella crossed to the other side of the fire, a little piece of her warming when Jacob's father offered her an endearing smile. Bending forward slightly, Bella left a gentle kiss on his cheek just before he reached up and squeeze her hand, offering his own shred of comfort without speaking a word. Without the pity in his eyes.
"She's getting so big," Billy remarked, dancing, black eyes flitting toward Maddie. "You need to bring that little girl by sometime, Bella. Charlie and I will take her out fishing - I know he's been chomping at the bit to teach her how."
Bella pushed out a breath as Maddie burrowed her head into the crook of her mother's neck, suddenly shy in front of all the people, despite the fact she knew every single one of them. It still took her awhile though, almost every time.
"Charlie was trying to get me to let her a while back," she murmured sincerely. "I told him maybe when she's old enough to know what happens when you lean too far over the side of the boat."
Billy chuckled warmly, pulling her from her thoughts before they could pull her down. He primly folded his hands in his lap. "You always were a worry wart. We'd never let her fall, Bella."
Offering him a tiny smile, Bella nodded, again feeling little hands back in her hair. "I know."
"Bells!"
Looking away from Billy, Bella saw Jacob striding purposefully up the beach, a short glance behind him confirming the pack was taking a break from their game. Bella offered him the same smile she did all the others, a shadow of the one she usually reserved for her best friend despite knowing he'd give her credit for it somewhere.
One arm sliding across her shoulders, Jacob pulled her into his warm, massive body, leaving a kiss on the side of her head. Reaching out, he brushed one long finger over the tip of Maddie's nose, eliciting a smile from the little girl even though she left her head where it was.
"Glad you made it," Jacob whispered, peering down at Bella with a smile.
Bella glanced away, not sure what Jake would see in her eyes when she responded, another part of her not wanting to risk it. "Wouldn't miss it."
"You wouldn't have missed much..."
Bella heard a cool, crisp voice from behind her. Jacob stepped away, both of them turning to see Leah making her way up the beach, an agitated yet amused expression on her face. "With the exception of us getting our asses kicked in soccer. You're kind of a crap midfielder, Black."
Jacob scowled and Bella lowered her eyes, even though she knew Leah wasn't trying to be mean. She simply was one of those who had a little easier time bringing things up...
Because even though Bella didn't know much about soccer, she remembered who normally played that position during their impromptu games.
"Do you wanna do it?" Jacob retorted sharply, lifting both eyebrows in challenge.
"Nah, I'm done," Leah replied with a wave of her hand. "Ateara can take my spot."
"Do I need to show him how it's done?"
Bella missed Quil appear beside her, his arms now free of the load he volunteered to carry from the car. He was grinning at Jacob, the mischievous glint in his eyes goading the other man.
Jacob simply rolled his eyes. "Please. If I need someone to show me how to trip over my own shoelaces, that's where you come in handy."
Quil snorted. "Is that how it's gonna be? Clearwater, what's the score?"
"Three to nothing. They're up."
Giving his neck a theatrical roll, Quil stretched his arms out in front of him, cracking his fingers. "Alright, Black...twenty bucks says I can at least tie it up before your dad gets this thing started."
Bella could feel a smile pulling at her mouth, her gaze flitting back and forth between Quil and Jacob. A part of her deep down amused by it all.
"You know I hate taking your money, Quil…"
"Oh, but I love taking yours."
"Are you girlies gonna come play or what?" Paul's impatient cry boomed from down the beach.
It was Quil's turn to roll his eyes. "Take it or leave it, Black."
Taking a step back, Jacob stared Quil down for several moments longer than necessary, keeping his poker face in place. Waiting long enough that Bella actually caught Quil when he inadvertently leaned forward in anticipation.
"You're on."
"Ha!" Quil clapped his hands together. "Easiest twenty bucks I'll ever make. Let's do this."
Shaking his head, Jacob groaned, his tall frame turning and starting down the beach. Quil made an amused, victorious noise in his throat before glancing at Bella, shrugging his shoulders before turning away. Before he took a step to follow his friend.
Before the shy, stoic little girl in Bella's arms finally came to life, pulling back. Lurching forward, a disapproving cry left her throat when Bella's hold around her tightened.
When Maddie threw her arms out toward Quil.
Quil stopped, and whatever words Bella was going to say disappeared on her tongue. He let his body half-turn back, eyes landing on Maddie's wiggling, outstretched fingers. The hands reaching for him.
Wanting out of her mother's arms and into his.
It took a couple seconds before Quil's gaze redirected - before he looked up at Bella. Before her mind searched with how she was supposed to react or feel about it. She knew Maddie loved her uncle Quil, but this was different. This was new.
In a way Bella wasn't sure she liked, even if she wasn't sure why.
Her head was still searching when Quil took a step forward, both eyebrows arching expectantly. Cautiously. Silently asking permission.
Bella wasn't sure why it hurt so much when she nodded.
A moment later, Quil reached out, her daughter shifting fluidly and without a peep from her arms to his.
"This should work," Quil murmured, giving the little girl a smile. "Maybe I shouldn't have bet Uncle Jacob so much money, huh?" Tipping his head up, Quil let Bella catch the last remnants of that smile before turning and heading down the beach.
"Alright, change of plans! Five against four now…"
Bella didn't move, watching for the longest time from where she stood. Arms crossed tightly in front of her, she watched as the genuine competition abruptly came to an end the moment Quil placed Maddie on the ground. As she peered up, watching her uncles with wide eyes and a bright smile. As their game shifted entirely to include a miniature team member.
"Getting tired of him yet?"
Startled, Bella glanced over to see Leah next to her, eyeing her pensively. The orange glow from the setting sun danced across the other woman's copper skin before Leah interrupted it, reaching up and brushing windswept hair from her eyes.
"Who? Quil?" Bella murmured, glancing back toward the soccer game, her grip on herself growing impossibly tighter as she watched Maddie tearing after a stray ball, her giggles increasing in pitch with every single step. Her efforts distracted by the fact both Seth and Quil were playfully on her heels.
Bella smiled, relishing the sight of her daughter and the fun she was having even though it still wasn't quite able to mask what she'd felt moments earlier. The stab of hurt. The apprehensiveness.
"He's been a huge help," Bella finally whispered, her mouth dry when she did. "You all have...even if I didn't tell you guys as soon as I should have."
Leah made an ironic noise in her throat. "Then what's with the weird look?"
Bella let the question sink in, her gaze still following her daughter. A part deep inside her still twisted in knots as she watched Quil take Maddie's hand, holding her up as one pudgy leg gracelessly kicked at the soccer ball. As Paul nonchalantly stepped out of the way of the goal, the ball bouncing erratically past his legs before the entire pack erupted into loud cheers. As Quil scooped Maddie up in his arms, twirling her around in some kind of victory dance as the smile on her face grew exponentially wider.
But Bella still couldn't put words to it. She still couldn't place where the dread inside her originated from.
Refusing to look at Leah, Bella shook her head instead.
"Everything's fine."
AN: Thanks, everyone, for all your continued feedback. Will be reaching out shortly to say thanks individually.
On that note...thoughts on this chapter?