Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Suggested Listening: "The Gilded Hand" by Radical Face

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The first time Quil slipped and thought about what happened between him and Bella was a week later.

He was phased with Jacob.

Quil was normally pretty good about keeping thoughts he didn't want shared under lock and key, but with as much as he'd been thinking about it - the way Bella felt, the way her skin tasted, the soft moans she released against his mouth - he was bound to slip.

He was bound to fucking slip.

And he definitely slipped.

However, what he wasn't expecting was for Jacob's thoughts to go completely silent. For him to order Quil back to two legs, phasing back himself before Quil could really argue. He listened, straightening his frame once all the fur disappeared and eyeing his friend carefully as he anxiously pushed one hand through his disheveled hair.

He expected Jacob to be a little angry, and he definitely was. That much was clear.

Quil knew because he could see it in the way Jacob was suddenly pacing the forest floor, still naked as a fucking jaybird. Bringing both hands up to his face, Jacob rubbed his temples, shaking his head back and forth erratically.

Regarding his friend with wide eyes, Quil ventured forward one step. Pulling in cautious breath after cautious breath as he reached out, almost like he was trying to placate his Alpha - and Bella's best friend - with a single, meaningless gesture.

"Jake, man…" he whispered.

He expected it when Jake dropped his arms to his sides and finally stopped pacing. When suddenly he went completely still and glared at Quil, a fire and anger in his eyes and a tension in his body Quil had only a handful of seconds to prepare himself for.

He expected Jake to move and he did, crossing the distance separating them with a purpose and a vengeance that had Quil taking a step back.

What Quil hadn't expected, however, was for Jacob to tell him exactly how he felt with a right hook to the fucking jaw.

Quil swore he heard a crunch as Jacob's fist connected with his face. As his friend's hulking frame suddenly disappeared from in front of him and the only thing Quil could see or feel was the forest floor pressed against his chest and stars momentarily dancing in his vision.

He took a moment to catch his breath. To blink away the blackness from his eyes before he rolled onto his back, reaching up and brushing his jaw with his fingers as Jacob towered over him, teeth bared and his chest heaving with labored, punctuated breaths.

Quil opened his mouth to talk, but an excruciating pain stopped him. Pulling in a deep breath and bracing himself, he gripped his jaw tightly, wincing as he relocated it in one swift, stupidly painful movement.

Opening his mouth and closing it a few times to make sure everything still worked correctly, Quil finally looked back to Jacob, pushing himself into a sitting position. Letting the words he was going to say die on his tongue when he swore he still saw fire in Jake's eyes.

"Okay, I probably deserved that," he muttered, reaching up and touching his jaw one last time.

"Fuck, Quil," Jacob seethed, his hands curling into ham-sized fists. Quil grimaced in spite of himself. "All the fucking girls on this rez, and you just had to…" Lips parting, Quil didn't have time to respond before Jacob took a swift step back, reaching up and rubbing his face roughly with his hands.

"God dammit," Jacob growled, the sound echoing off the trees as he turned his back on Quil. As he took a couple steps, furiously snagging his shorts from his ankle before pulling them on. Before he took another two steps and collapsed on a fallen tree covered in moss, head in his hands.

Quil knew Jacob probably wasn't going to like the idea, but he hadn't suspected he would dislike it that much. He hadn't expected such an emotional reaction, and the truth was it threw him a little.

Still, Quil reached for his own shorts, pulling them on before he stood. Before he tentatively approached Jacob who was still sitting on the tree, both hands clasped together and pressed to his mouth as he refused to look at his friend.

"Jake, man, I know what you're probably thinking…"

Jacob released an ironic laugh, shaking his head. "I really doubt that."

Risking the other side of his face, Quil took a chance, closing the gap between them and sitting on the fallen tree next to Jacob.

"Dude, I can promise you...it's not just what you saw, or what you're probably thinking."

Quil could see Jacob's fist clench for a single second before he released it, fingers unfurling and stretching before he finally let them fall to his lap. Before he let out a long breath, the angry lines around his features somehow easing when he did.

And Quil let out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

"I know…"

Quil wasn't expecting that response from Jacob either.

Blinking, he gaped at his friend. "You know?"

Jacob nodded, an unconvincing, ironic half-smile pulling at the corner of his mouth as he stared at his feet and the ground below them. "I know," he repeated. "I'm not an idiot, Quil. You and Bella are both my friends, and it's my job to fucking pay attention."

Quil swallowed, trying to think of something else to say to defend himself. To defend Bella and let Jake know what happened - and what could still happen - wasn't something he planned on. It wasn't something he set out wanting.

But he didn't get the chance to tell him.

"I know Bella...probably better than she knows herself some days, and I've seen it, Q," he insisted, his voice shaking inexplicably beneath the weight of it. "I've seen the way she's been looking at you these past few months. I've seen it…" His words cut off long enough for him to turn his head, to catch Quil's stunned gaze. "And I've seen the way you look at her, too. We all have…"

Quil wasn't sure why his stomach twisted beneath the revelation, but he closed his eyes anyway, pulling in a deep, calming breath. Trying to figure out what to do with Jacob's words mixed with everything else on his mind.

"It's just…"

Jacob's words pulled Quil's eyes open, and he could see the moisture in the corner of his friend's eyes, a product of his frustration and something he had yet to say.

"What, man?" Quil prompted him quietly.

Jacob shook his head, a tense laugh slipping from his lips as he pushed a hand distractedly through his hair. "I wanted it to be anyone but you," he said lowly, glancing at Quil and continuing before he could react or take the words the wrong way. "Anyone but one of us...fucking anyone, Quil, so long as it got her away from this life." Jacob's voice wavered beneath the weight of his words, but he pressed on. "Because it's taken too much from her and Maddie already..."

Quil held his breath, a wave of understanding rushing through his veins, settling as a thick knot in his stomach. He hadn't thought about it, but hearing Jake say it, Quil understood where he was coming from. Knowing no matter what, there was a small part of him that could see the truth in Jake's words, the validity of them crystal clear.

After all, Quil had been there. He had seen just how big of a price Bella and Maddie paid. How big of a price they all paid.

And when he really took a moment to think about it, there was a small part of Quil that couldn't help but agree with Jake.

Not because he didn't care about Bella. He did care about her, probably more than he should.

Because he never again wanted her - and especially not Maddie - to lose anymore than they already had.

Still, there was a part of Quil that wasn't sure how much weight that concern would carry with the person it was directed toward.

"You know better than anyone, man, that you can't really tell Bella what to do," Quil murmured, an halfhearted smile pulling at his lips.

Jacob chuckled again, except it was lighter. A little less burdened.

"I know," he agreed, staring at his hands, "but I'll be honest, Quil, and don't take it personally...but there's a part of me that still wants to try."

Quil pushed down the dull ache inside him, but he was unable to ignore where those words landed or the chord they struck.

How he swallowed thickly, saying the words even though a larger part of him screamed to keep them inside…

"Me too, man."

Damn Jake and his valid points that may or may not have killed me to bring up...

Thoughts?