You know there's something wrong when I think that waiting a few days to update is a long time. You know that somehow... I've caught... FANFICTION FEVER. It's quite a frightening thing, really.
Zach: Yeah, especially when you're next to it day and night.
Abby: -british accent- You know you love it, Zachary. You love how crazy I can get. Fanfiction fever is a lovely, lovely mental illness. I'm afraid I've caught it. Too bad it didn't happen before. Hmm.. This is quite fun, thinking in a British accent like a lunatic -smiles-
Zach: Read the chapter, guys. AGAIN, I have to help this poor soul.
Abby: -double wink-

Previously on 50 Ways to Annoy Iggy: THE STORY

I ignored their chuckles and checked the caption to the pictures, then closed Jeffrey's lid and stood up.

"I'm out. Being an evil genius sure takes a lot out of me. Let's just pick up where we left of tomorrow, and call it a day."

I jumped up into the tree I was leaning on and slowly allowed myself to go invisible, my color slowly fading out into the dark, natural colors of the forest behind me.

# 10- lock him in a closet without food or water for 5 hours

Max POV

I was flying. But totally not flying. I mean, my wings were tucked into my back. I looked up at who held me captive in their arms. He leaned down and kissed me; I was engulfed in darkness. I felt his smooth tongue lightly swipe over my lip and I-

I felt something nudging my back, so I swatted it away, wanting to continue my dream. Until I felt the nuisance again. I hopped up yelling, "WHAT?"

I saw Fang jump back. He chuckled.

"Calm down, it's just me. Fly with me." I sighed, wondering how early it was, but listened. We flew over the trees until Fang pointed out a large rock on the shore of a cave. We landed on the rock and sat down next to each other.

"Whats up, Fang?" He wasn't looking at me. "Is everything alright?" My eyes immediately shot to his stomach. "Are you hurt again?" He laughed.

"No, Max, I'm fine, they're fine, everything's fine. I just wanted to talk to you." I sighed and gestured for him to start. "Well, first off, it's about the list. And the best interest for the flock." I gave him an impatient look. "I think we should give your mom a visit." I looked at him and then broke into a grin, hugging him.

"That's a great idea, Fang!" He seemed content with my response. "Was there anything else?" Again, he wasn't looking at me. "Fang?" He finally looked up.

"Max, I need you to be truthful with me. I can't just ignore this anymore. I just can't." I looked down, ready for the question, but Fang's rough, but gentle finger lifted my chin up so that I was looking at him. "I need you to tell me how you feel about me. If you don't feel the same way, that's alright, I'll forget about it. But I need to know. I'm sick and tired of pretending that I feel nothing between us when I do."

He leaned in and suddenly I was dreaming again. His tongue caressed my lip and I gasped, accidentally allowing him access. Not that I was unhappy about it. Everything went smoothly, like a dream come true.

That is, until we both went falling off of the rock and into the freezing cold, night-time lake. When we surfaced, we were both laughing like lunatics. He pushed on my shoulders and we both went underwater. I opened my eyes and he was circling me. Bubbles exited my open mouth as I continued to giggle, and journied up to the top of the no longer still and quiet water.

I came up for air and looked around. Fang's hand was sticking up through the very top of the water, and he was bobbing up and down.

"Help... me... drown...ing..." He managed to get out as the water managed to reach his lips. I laughed and shoved his head under water. I stayed there laughing, treading water and waiting for the bird boy to come up to where I was. He did, but was on his stomach. I gave him a nudge, knowing he was faking.

"Come on, Fang, quit playing around." He continued not to move. "Shit," I muttered, dragging the no longer breathing boy with me to shore. I got him to the very start of the shore; to where the rocky excuse for sand started to mush into mud and the water splashed by in tiny waves.

"Fang, pull through. Come on, bud! I need you here! Don't you dare fucking leave me. You can't leave me!" I was hitting his still chest, tears forming in my eyes.

"FANG. Wake up, Fang, please. Stay with me, you ass hole. I... I love you." I pushed on his chest and waited for some kind of water to come up. Pinching his nose, I blew as much air as I could muster into his lifeless body. By now I was sobbing onto his dark, sopping wet figure. I manuevered myself onto Fang and laid my head on his stomach, whispering his name to myself.

I heard a chuckle from beneath me. Wiping my closed eyes, I looked towards the chuckle. Fang had a stupidly ironic smirk on his face.

"How... You... But... That doesn't make sense!" I sputtered. He smiled and pointed towards his neck.

"Gills." I crawled over to his face and leaned towards him.

"You're a jerk," I spat, and then kissed him. "I love you, but you're a jerk." We sat together, soaked from head to toe, until the sun came up, just enjoying the company of the other.

In the morning, we told the kids that we were going to my mom's.

And thank the heavens that we were only about twenty miles north of her house. That was a piece of cake and we made it there just in time for two o'clock double chocolate chip cookies!

Angel had read our minds about what happened at the lake and apparently told everyone, so Fang and I being an unofficial item was no secret. But apparently it wasn't to any of them. I ignored that.

I had Angel mentally tell Gazzy and Nudge about the plan for the next thing to do on the list and when we arrived at my mom's I told her and Ella about it. They agreed to helping as much as they could. Well, Ella did, Mom just okay-ed the whole thing. I have the best mom.

After lunch, I opened the closet door and left a bottle of water and a half a pack of oreos outside of it. Fang walked in with Iggy, talking about a cool 'sound system' we owned. Iggy had his finger through Fang's belt loop and was being led inside the closet.

"It's right over there to the right. Feel across the wall," Fang told him as he backed out of the closet and swiftly shut and locked the door.

I heard a muffled, "Guys! What?", and a bang on the door. "Seriously? Really, you always pick on the blind guy."

Really, he was right.

But we blame the7thflockmember.

WOW. WAY TO THROW ME UNDER THE BUS, MAX.

Zach: Hahahahhahahahahahhahaha that's great! For once it's not me!
Abby: Watch it, you. You're already on thin ice.
Zach: Well you didn't just give me the scissors! And look!
Abby: I couldn't pass up a chance to add a little bit of the Fax spice into my recipe of hilariosity! I hope it was a nice twist! Enjoy, dearies!

Love and Stupid Snapple Facts,

Abby