This chapter contains a Trigger Warning. Everyone that doesn't want to read it, should go on after "Trigger end". This chapter for the first time, explains the "speed" of it all. Why things are the way they are. Why Connor and Daryl feel this burning.

I read a lot on the topic of souls. I am aware that I am not using the right terms but I will leave a link for you that are interested in more. See notes at the end of this chapter! There will be further hints and explanations in upcoming chapters.

I know I put you all through immense pain and tears but I swear I will make it better. Somehow.

That there must be a way out, cause it can't go on like this

Connor woke up and he was freezing. His arms and legs were spread and tied up. He felt rope inside his mouth, the material was ripping his tongue open. The worst thing was that he was naked. Only wearing his boxers. He tried to move his head to see if he had any injuries but he couldn't see anything. Not even what was next to him. Connor closed his eyes and he felt so alone and so broken. He was exhausted and cold, he knew he would die. The man would torture him a bit and then kill him. Probably faster than Beth. They must have had her for about two weeks. Connor knew he would only survive one day, maybe two. Beth would need at least one day to reach the camp and it would take nearly another to get them here. If she finds them. There was no chance he would make it out.
He started praying in his head, ignoring that this freak came down the stairs and was talking to him. When he ended his prayer he looked to the man who was holding a flashlight in his hands. "You know, I thought you wouldn't wake up. I didn't want to start without you." Sick bastard, Connor thought. He could hear something - metal screeching over the table. The man grabbed Connors face and pressed his fingers into the Irish's jaw. "Now, ready to start?" Connor gave him a death glare. He would not give in. He would not break in front of that bastard.
Connor felt the knife cutting open his skin right underneath his heart. Then paused and he felt another cut across his whole stomach. They were not deep. Only enough to make them bleed. The guy was smiling and made the same move from under the right side of Connor's chest. Then the middle. Connor was putting the cuts together and he recognized that this probably looked like a weird arrow pointing to his lower half. And before thinking about it any further the guy cut the fabric of his shorts in half. Connor was now completely naked. He closed his eyes for a second. There are two things he was afraid of. First being raped. But one thing was even worse. Being castrated. And at the moment it just seemed like his opponent had exactly the same thought. "Ya' know you are already so skinny and look like a girl. Why not make you one?"
Connor felt the knife near his manhood and started struggling.
That monster started laughing. "Oh. You don't like that?" He took the knife away and then held it to Connor's throat. The dark brown eyes of his punisher looked black in the little light of the flashlight and he gave him an angry look. The knife drew a little blood from his throat and then it cut open his right cheek. His punisher smirked and went on. Connor closed his eyes and thought about Murphy, their mum, Ireland and movies. He thought about the days before the apocalypse. the days when they were the saints. There was no god anymore. He wouldn't let this happen to good people. Would he? Where was his sign? Why lead them to Terminus and the group and then let Connor die. Daryl. Connor thought. Because of Daryl. Daryl was his sign. The man with his brothers face, the man with the angel wings on his vest. That man that needed to be loved and cared of. Daryl. Connor had to hold his tears back when he felt the pain in his heart and soul. He missed Murphy. But he missed Daryl too. At least he had saved Beth. At least he had done something right before he would die.
His opponent was untying him and Connor opened his eyes. He had to try to get away. As soon as his hand was free he started to punch the guy. He felt his middle finger break. His knuckles split open but he punched on and the freak just laughed. "You want to stroke and pat me. Cute."
Connor felt the pranks close around his wrist and then the guy walked over to the other side. Connor tried to free his hand but didn't succeed. The man was now freeing one leg. Then another hand and Connor again punched him and struggled but couldn't get rid of the guy. He couldn't knock him out. The guy grabbed him around his waist and holding him while cutting the rope on Connors last ankle. Then he turned Connor around, bending him over. Feet to the ground, hand behind his back. The guy started binding Connor's hands together. Connor struggled because he knew what was coming. His face was pressed to the table and he felt the knife driving along his tattoo. "Bet your god left the building. He can't save you now, can he?" Then the knife was gone and Connor heard the man opening his belt. Connor breathed in and out and then shut his eyes close. He flinched when the metal of the belt met his flesh. Leaving big bruises and streams on his skin. He stopped counting after 15 hits. His whole back felt like it was on fire. He heard the man laugh and giggle and telling him how much blood he was seeing and that he would be too tired to struggle soon. Connors mind was grabbing itself onto every positive moment he ever had. All the time with his brother, Ireland, Boston, Rocco, Daryl, movies, hell he was thinking about whiskey, beer and pizza.

TRIGGER

Connor had to get out of there. He tried to push the man behind him away be jerking his back up but that made the man put a hand on his back, pressing him deeper onto the table. "Behave or I will hurt you even more."
Connor heard something falling to the ground and he tried to look over his shoulder but couldn't see anything. "Hmm. I hope you are as tight as I think you are. Let me have some fun with you before I finish you off."
Connor struggled again but when he knew he couldn't get any inch of space to move, he shut his eyes close again, tried to blend out what was happening to him and tried to relax because he knew it wouldn't hurt so much if he just relaxed. It was happening anyway. He breathed out and just waited for it to happen. Tears were filling in his eyes because he was scared and tired. His body felt like it was no longer his and when the man pushed into him he screamed and for the first time in his life he was not screaming for Murphy. No he didn't want Murphy here. He was screaming for Daryl. Glad that he was gagged and the name didn't leave his mouth. Tears were streaming down his face when he felt the man move behind him. His inside was too dry, too sensitive and he could feel something tearing up inside of him. The guy's hip always touching his butt. "Fuck ya' tigh' boy. Ya' never had a dick in ya' ass I bet. Come on, scream for me." But Connor didn't scream, he didn't struggle anymore. Connor gave up. After a while he heard him moan and talking but Connor tried to think of better things. Better days.

TRIGGER END

He thought of dying. Because that would be better than this. And he thought of Daryl. He had gone through this a several times if Connor was right. Daryl..he wished that man would save him. He wished he would have saved Daryl. Something in his chest was hurting way more than what was happening to him. He knew. Connor had known from the start. Daryl wasn't just anybody to him. He was is soulmate. His twin flame.
He had read about it. All the phases they would go through. Recognizing. Running. Denying. Accepting. Love. It sometimes happened that souls decide to be the same gender. He had read it. Connor was denying already from the second he had seen him. He had recognized him, he had touched him and felt it. Now he was running and denying. All he wanted to do is accept it. Connor was not gay. Connor just found his other half. That one person he was longing for his whole life. The one he always felt but never found. It hurt that he would never be able to see him again. Fall in Love with him. Tell him. Connor tried to remember Daryl. They only met days ago but it was as if he knew him since always. His tears stopped and he felt empty. He was in pain. On the outside but his inside hurt even more.
Connor didn't know how long this all went at one point he had closed his eyes and passed out. Welcoming the blackness like a relief. When he woke up again he was on the ground and the guy was kneeling next to him, his belt in hand. "Well I guess I will keep ya' alive for a while until ya' beg me to kill ya'. Maybe I can find some new ways to torture ya'." He was turned to his side and he felt the knife on his tights again, then the belt and Connor felt himself falling back into the blackness.

Murphy woke Beth and Daryl as soon as he could see his hand in front of his eyes. He had to go find Connor. He had felt incredible pain in his body. He had felt dizzy and pictures of Ireland and Pizza had crossed his mind. He knew those weren't his own feelings. It was a projection of Connors thoughts. Daryl had snapped his eyes open one time when Murphy was whimpering in pain. But had closed them when he saw that Murphy was okay. Now the hunters eyes opened and he just nodded. Beth woke up on Daryl's shoulder and smirked. They didn't speak because Murphy was already moving. "It isn't far anymore. It is right at the end of the woods", Beth said.
"Listen, you will take my crossbow and wait behind a tree for us. I don't want you in there." Daryl explained.
"Okay. I will shoot everything coming near the houses. You have to go to the third one. There is a front door and a back-door. Better take the back-door. And there is a door hidden behind a coat wrack. That's where they held me hostage."
Daryl nodded. "Thank you. You need to take care of you. Ya' still know how to shoot girl?"
"Yes Mr. Dixon." Murphy was chewing on his thumb. He was getting really nervous. Something was wrong.
"Okay lass, listen, we'll hurry. When we come runnin' towards yeh, yeh have to shoot if someone follows." Beth nodded and they reached the end of the woods. Daryl took the gun from his backpack and a knife in the other hand. Murphy grabbed the rosary and pulled it out of his shirt. He kissed it and let it hang on his chest. Then grabbed both his guns, checked the magazines. His face suddenly hard and more like the hunters. Daryl watched Murphy and was fascinated about his little ritual. "Yer ready to free our brother, lil' bro?"
Murphy locked eyes with Daryl who just nodded. They both seemed to have grown. Beth watched them walk away. Side by side. They looked like men that knew what they wanted. Bold and brave. Like brothers in arms. She wondered what had happened to Daryl.
They stopped walking when they reached the backside of the house. Both grabbing for the doorknob and pulling the door open. They could hear someone in there and Murphy yelled. "Show yourself", both weapons in front of him.
Nothing happened. Murphy rushed forward and Daryl followed. They moved through the rooms but didn't see anyone. Daryl gave his friend a sign that he was going upstairs. Murphy waited and tried to figure out where the sounds came from. He thought he heard something from underneath his feet. "Hold on Conn", he whispered. "Nothing", he heard Daryl say. When the hunter was close enough Murphy moved to the door that Beth mentioned. Daryl pulled it open and Murphy ran downstairs as fast as possible. He looked around and saw a flashlight pointing at him and then saw the guy holding it. Murphy shot the second he saw him. His bullets hitting each shoulder. Then each foot. Daryl stepped behind him gasping. Because he didn't concentrate on the side Murphy was shooting at but the other side where he saw Connor. Lying on the floor, naked, blood everywhere, curled up into himself. Tied up and gagged. "DAR'"; Murphy yelled. Daryl looked at Murphy and both ran to the freak and while Daryl was hitting the shit out of that monster, losing all his anger that was bottled up for so many years, Murphy started to pray.

"And Shepherds we shall be For thee, my Lord, for thee. Power hath descended forth from Thy hand Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands."

He was pulling Daryl off the guy. jerking him up. He placed himself behind the guy and gave Daryl a sign to take the other spot.

"So we shall flow a river forth to Thee And teeming with souls shall it ever be. In Nomeni Patri Et Fili Spiritus Sancti."

Both men fired their weapon and Murphy crossed the arms in front of the guy. Then they ran over to Connor and this was the first time Murphy saw him. Murphy froze. "No," he croaked.
Daryl was cutting the rope and looked at the skinny figure in front of him. The white liquid on his back. The streams of a belt, the little stars someone through the eyes of Connor's Jesus tattoo. As if someone wanted god to see. Daryl shook his head he needed to focus and hide Connor's back. His eyes trying to find this friends clothes. He saw Conn's jeans and moved Connor gently. The man was unconscious. Daryl sucked the air in and held his breath. Connors whole chest was cut open with little cuts. He even had cuts on his tights, between his legs and around his manhood. Daryl's eyes were filled with tears now and he heard Murphy breathing heavy. "Is...is..he alive?"
"Yeah." Barely, Daryl thought. His eyes checked his friends body again. His face was swollen and one cheek was cut open. Connors lips were bloody and even his tongue seemed to be bloody but only a bit. This would heal fast. Daryl tried to dress Connor as good as possible. His Shirt was cut in two. So he just striped over the pea coat. "Murphy. Little help. We need to get him to the group."
Murphy did as Daryl told him, following every order. His eyes never leaving Connors face. Both looked at each other when they had dressed their brother. "His rosary. I need to find his rosary. Connor never leaves it alone. He needs it when he wakes up. he..." "Shh. Look for it. I will carry him upstairs." Murphy nodded and Daryl ignored his own pain when he lifted Connor up. He was carrying him upstairs and waited for Murphy to join them. The older one was behind them after a minute. "Found it. And all his stuff." He striped the rosary over Connors head. The cross now resting on Connor's bare chest. They left without wasting more time, running to the woods. Beth was already waiting for them and she said: "Is he alive?"
"yes but we need to hurry. The others wanted to start driving today. I have a list where they wanted to go. I remember the first roads they wanted to take. We have to use these roads and hope they will find us."
Hope. Daryl snorted. This was too much. He looked down on the lifeless body in his ams. Connor wasn't heavy but Daryl felt as if he was carrying the whole world in his arms. Murphy looked incredibly frightened. When Daryl started walking both followed. Daryl just had to believe that there was still a way to survive this. He would never admit this but those two twins felt more like family than Merle ever did.

Here is the Link I mentioned above: 2011/10/01/phases-of-a-twinflame-relationship/ - it is really just a really easy summery of twin flames. I have read a lot of different things about it because I don't believe in numbers (age) - I only believe in souls. Soulmates. Actually I have my own theory about it all but I try to keep it out of stories (mostly). But with Murphy's and Connor's connection it was just too easy to write Daryl into it. So..yeah..Let us just wait what comes next, huh? ;)