17

I woke up and stretched then looked over to find the other bed empty. I sat up and I could hear the shower running. I went to the bathroom door and knocked.

"Gadreel, you alright in there?"

"Yes," came through the door in a low tone.

"Can I come in?"

"Yes," I opened the door slowly to find something odd.

"Gadreel, what are you doing?" He was sitting in the tub fully clothed with the water running. He was sitting leaned over his knees that where at his chest with his arms wrapped around them. He looked up at me as I pulled the clear curtain back and knelt on the floor beside the tub. "Normally people shower without their clothes." I laughed slightly, but he looked at me with the same ridged face. Water ran down his face and flattened his dark blond hair to his head. "What's wrong?" I asked, feeling his face. He wasn't warm but he was exhausted.

"This is the only place I feel calm."

"Well, you can't stay in here. You'll get sick." I turned the water off and handed him a towel. "Come on," I helped him onto the mat and wrapped the towel around his shoulders. He was such an angel. They were so weird. "How long have you been in here?"

"An hour," I sighed and tried to rub him down as he wasn't doing it.

"Gad, this was your only set of clothes."

"Gad?" he face lightened up slightly as the nickname.

"Yeah, nickname. Shorter name." I clarified. "Humans use them. Gabriel is Gabe, Castiel is Cas, you get it."

"Gad," he repeated.

"Wow you really do need to sleep. Stay here. I'm going to see if they have a dryer I can use. I'll be right back." I looked over the whole six roomed motel with no luck but came back with some poptarts from a vending machine.

"Well, there was no dryer but I found breakfast." I tossed him the poptart and ripped into mine. It was gone in seconds but I was starving. Gadreel's was too.

We were in the car soon and on our way to the one place I had left to go. The angel was damp beside me in the car but we just had to deal with it. His stomach was growling not long after we pulled away. He looked down at himself. "You're still hungry." I informed him.

"How often you we need to eat?"

"Depends. Normally we eat three big meals but on the road like this people eat the whole time. We'll be there in a few hours. Okay?"

"Okay," he shivered. Boy did he have a lot learn.

When I pulled up to the shaggy apartment I felt an old feeling of nostalgia bubble up. "This is it." I turned off the car.

"Where are we?"

"Home," I got out of the car and hauled my bag to the porch where I dug for my house key. I found it and opened up to the dusty place. "Sorry about the mess. No one's been around for a while. Wait here and I'll find you something dry to put on." I quickly ran to my uncle's old room. He was more Gadreel's height than my brother was. I found something that would work and I brought it down to the angel who'd found his way to the kitchen. He was downing a box of crackers that had to have been stale as hell.

I cleared my throat and said, "I found these."

"I'm sorry," he put down the box and took the clothes.

"You can change in there." I pointed to the bathroom behind the kitchen. He followed my finger and I started to dig for something to eat. I found a few cans of soup that I got to cooking just as he came back out.

"There, those fit nicely."

"Thank you for these."

"They were my uncle's. He was about your height."

"What is that?" he sniffed the air.

"Soup, just about done too." I scooped him a large bowl and then one for myself. We sat at the dusky kitchen table and got to eating. His was gone in seconds just like the poptart. I finished mine and sat back in the chair. "It's nice to have a day off." I smiled.

"What do people do on their 'day off'?" he asked.

"They go out, sleep in, watch movies or TV, or nothing at all. That's what's great about days off. You can do whatever you want." I saw in the kitchen light how tired he looked now. Even worse than yesterday.

"What do you do?"

"Hmm… I love a good movie with popcorn in a comfy couch with a blanket."

"Do you have all those things?"

"Hm, yes." I nodded.

"Can we do that?"

"I don't see why not. It is our day off." I showed him how to make popcorn then poured it into a big bowl before heading out to the living room. But as I made it to the doorway, I stopped and stared. The green carpet was cleaned. I remembered my brother's blood pooling on it.

"Satine?" Gadreel called me. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I shook my head and went to the couch. "So what do you wanna watch?" He just looked at me. "Oh, right. You've never watched movies before. Alright, then I'll just throw in my favorite." I grabbed a DVD and threw it into the player before sitting on the couch beside the angel after grabbing a blanket from a chest beside the TV. I switched on the TV and threw the blanket over both of us.

"This is a good one, but you gotta pay attention, okay? It's my favorite so no talking." I teased as Inception started. We were about an hour into it when I felt Gadreel starting to lean on my shoulder. I pushed him back slightly but he did it again. "Hey, pay attention." I whispered and looked at him. His arms were crossed loosely across his chest and his mouth hung open slightly. His eyes were glued shut during the best part, but I couldn't help but smile.

I got up carefully and laid him so his head was on the end pillow of the couch. Then I lifted his legs so he was on his side. I spread the whole blanket over him as he snored softly and then stood up. "There ya go," I mumbled to myself before turning off the TV and heading upstairs where I opened my computer from my desk and started scrolling.

I was just starting to nod off at about nine when I heard something fall downstairs. I got up and grabbed my blade then headed down the stairs. It was dark and still. I couldn't smell demon but that didn't mean we were alone. I went to the living room but found it empty. The angel was no longer on the couch or anywhere I could see.

"Gadreel?" I called out and gripped the blade tighter. Then I pulled back quickly as something grabbed me. I almost struck the shadow but his words stopped me.

"Satine,"

"What are you doing down here? You scared the shit out of me."

"I saw you covered in blood. And she was there, laughing at you. Then I sat up and you were gone."

"It was just a nightmare. I'm fine, okay?" He looked me over before nodding. "Come with me, you need to go back to sleep." I led him to my room and told him to lay in my bed.

"Where will you sleep?" he asked laying down.

"Here hopefully, so don't take up the whole thing." He scooted closer to the wall side of the bed and I got in beside him. "If you steal the blankets I will kick you out." He eyed me nervously. "I'm kidding, Gad. Now go to sleep." He got comfortable and I pulled the blanket up and over my shoulders just as I started to hear snoring beside me. I smiled, he was finally sleeping.

I got up early the next morning and got right to cleaning after putting up a few sigils. It had been a long time since I had been home and after the deaths in the house, it was time to move on. This began at four in the morning starting with the kitchen. Papers and garbage laid everywhere, down the hall to the front door and it took over much of the countertops. I hauled out bags of trash and soon most was collected. Next came the scrubbing. I bleached down tables and walls until everything was clean. The fridge was cleaned out and all old food was trashed.

When that was cleaned I went to the living room and straightened up then dusted. That didn't take much time. I'd wait to vacuum once Gadreel was awake. There was no point in disturbing him now that he was finally sleep.

I moved onto my uncle's room where I dug through drawers and gathered up anything I thought the angel would wear and brought them out to the living room in a pile. His bed was still made from the day he died. Uncle was in the military for a few years when he was younger and he always kept the place clean. It only went to hell after he died. His room didn't need much cleaning or boxing up. He never married so there were no pictures to take down. No extra clothing to donate or keepsakes to save. Uncle Fisher was a bare man. He said he never needed anything but my brother and I.

Once that was done I headed to the kitchen after passing the door down to my brother's room. I knew what kind of mess was lingering down there but that would be for another day. I couldn't do that yet.

In the kitchen I got a pot of coffee going then went through what food was left. Everything in the fridge was gone and most of the cabinets had been eaten through by the many mice that were famous in this neighborhood. All that was left looked to be a few cans of spam. Boy did my uncle love spam.

It was nearing nine when I got out a pan and oil to fry up the spam. I could hear shuffling around upstairs. Perfect timing. The pan was nice and hot by the time he came down and I handed him a glass of water.

"What's that smell?" he asked.

"Bleach, I was cleaning. So, how did you sleep?"

"Very well, thank you. It was a strange feeling at first but I feel much better."

"Good, I'm glad."

A local home was left in ruins this morning after what appears to have been an animal attack in the early hours of the morning, leaving four dead. Police are currently investigating the home, but they are not certain what animal is at fault.

"Hey, can you keep stirring this, I need to make a phone call." I said heading into the living room. I looked at the pictures on the TV before pulling out my cell and making a much needed call.

"Satine?"

"Hey Dean, it's me."

"Where have you been?! We've been looking everywhere for you!"

"Dean, I'm fine but I was pulled away for a while."

"What's going on? Yeah it's Satine," he said to Sam.

"Angels, listen there is a case here in Watertown I think you need to see."

"We're already on our way up there. Got a call from another hunter a few hours ago. We'll check the place out then meet you. Okay?"

"Yeah, alright."

"Stay away from the angels, got it? How the hell did you get back there anyway?"

"I'll explain everything when you get here alright?"

"Fine," he agreed begrudgingly.

"Later," I hung up the phone then went back to the kitchen. On the table were two plates of spam. The angel was digging through drawers for forks. Dean had told me to stay away from the angels but I don't know if he knew everything that was going on.

"Are you alright?" he eyed me as I stared at him.

"Yeah," I shook my head. "Let's eat." We sat down to the spam and ate quickly. "Sorry it's not very good, but we don't have much to work with."

"What happened here?"

"Huh?"

"Something bad happened here, someone was killed. Demons, I can feel them."

"Gadreel, you said you knew who I was. What exactly do you know?"

"Your mother, Elizabeth was an angel before she was cast out of heaven. You have her grace and heaven is hunting you. That is all. I was locked away until only recently so I do not know much else."

"Because I am part angel I am a strong vessel, strong enough for powerful demons to last in me. Nora, one of hell's finest, got me a few months ago. I was possessed for almost a year, during which she collected souls, killing hundreds of people, including my uncle. When my mother and father died in the accident, when I was young, he took my brother and myself into his home to raise us. When Castiel expelled Nora from me I was left a broken mess. My mind was ruined from her clawing. He was able to patch me up but when I came back here, Crowley killed my brother, in the living room. That is what you feel and smell. Demons no doubt have been in here many times looking for me. It wouldn't surprise me if angels had too."

"That explains the other night." He put down his fork.

"Yes, my family was killed because of me. I am the last of them. Gabriel sent me away because they could find me through him. Castiel too. I wanted you to go away because at some point they will find me and kill me. You should not be here for that."

"I told you that I'd give my life for you. Because I am human does not change that."

"Angels and their honor." I sighed to myself and finished eating.

He looked at me with a puzzled face before saying, "In the Garden I watched humanity for hundreds of years. You are such curious creatures, petty, and strong willed."

"Ok, you're starting to sound offensive now."

"My apologies. What I am meaning to say is that for so long I admired you. Your love, willingness to help others and protect. I see now that hasn't been changed. You've evolved, that is certain, but your natural essence is still intact."

"Gadreel, how many humans have you met, since you got out?"

"A few, why?"

"You have not seen the world. Not all people are the same. People can be cruel and harsh. They kill and take."

"You are telling me not to generalize you?"

"Yes,"

"But you do with us. You said how we "love our guilt" and our "honor"." He got me there. I had said those things. He stood in front of me making full eye contact. "It is not my honor that I wish to reclaim but forgiveness and redemption. I am not like those who hunt you, nor am I like those who need to hide you away. I've seen that you can protect yourself, and I understand why you don't want people close to you, but I am here to help you. You just have to let me." His hands were on my shoulders.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, my eyes shining damp. His mouth opened slightly and his eyes brows grew closer.

"I did not mean to make you sad." He withdrew his hands.

"No, you're right. I don't let people come close to me because I know they'll be killed and I don't think I could watch it happen again. I'm not that strong." I turned from him and grabbed the dishes before going to the sink to wash them.

When I finished I got a text. It was from Dean saying they were in town.

"Gadreel," I called down the hall. He came from the living room and saw me grabbing my keys.

"Where are we going?"

"I need to get some more food. You stay here for a little while. Relax and I'll be home soon. Okay?"

"I cannot go with you?"
"Not this time. I won't be long. Watch some TV or something. Enjoy another down day." He looked tense in the hall. "Please don't worry about me, not today."

"Take this then." He handed me the angel blade that I'd left on the couch.

"Thank you. See you later." I pulled on my coat and went to the car where I pulled out my phone and made a quick call telling them where to meet.

I got to the small coffee shop in about twenty minutes and found them waiting for me at a table. They both got up for hugs which I happily gave.

"It's good to see you guys." I smiled.

"Where have you been?" Sam asked the shock in both their faces was a little too much.

"Relax, I've only been gone a few days."

"Days?"

"Okay, this is going to sound crazy but I was in another world of sorts, like a dream world. Castiel was there and so was Gabriel."

"Gabriel?" Dean questioned.

"Yeah, a few angels got me and Cas and tried to kill me, burn me alive actually. Gabriel saved us and I was with him for a little while. It all seemed so real for a while but they I slowly figured out that it couldn't have been. Time was missing between events. I could hear your voices but they seemed to be just clouds so I figured dreams. I met Lucifer at some point but I don't know if he was real at all."

"You met Lucifer?" they were both dumbfounded.

"I know I sounds crazy but I finally began to understand what I am." I looked at them both, they were looking at me funny. "What?"

"Satine, you've been gone for a year."

"A year?!"

"Yes,"
"I've only been with Gabe for a little while."

"Satine, Gabriel is dead." Sam said.

"I know, he told me. But somehow he comes to my dreams. The day that I drove off he came to me. That was when the angels had me in a warehouse tied up and lit a fire. He saved me with Castiel. Then I was in the lodge again with you guys and Castiel and Gabriel. They were protecting me. Then I jumped to an ally. I was pissed and scared and running. That's where I met Lucifer. He hinted to me that I was something different and told me that he'd protect me."

"The devil is protecting you?" they smirked.

"I don't know. You see everything seemed real but at the same time it didn't. Gabriel found me and finally told me about my mother." I explained to them about Elizabeth and how I have her grace and why the angels are after me. They understood but they didn't look like they believed me.

"You said it was a dream." Dean pointed out.

"Yes, but it made sense. That's why Nora needed me. I was strong enough to hold her." They both still looked skeptical so I took out the angel blade and quickly cut Dean's hand.

"What the hell?!"

"Watch," I put my hand over the cut and focused on it. A few moments later I lifted my hand and it was gone.

"It's true." Sam said, amazed.

"It is." A voice said behind me. I turned to see Castiel standing behind me.

"Cas, we've been praying for you for weeks." Dean almost shouted.

"I've been—busy." He said.

"Yeah, we heard. Could you do us a favor and warn us next time you decide to grab her. And you, let us know when you're heading out." Dean looked at me.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were worried."

"Of course I was worried, after and the demon stuff. We thought they'd gotten you again."

"Satine, I have a message from Gabriel." Cas said.

"What?"

"Um, it's only for you." He looked at the guys.

"Oh, ok." I walked outside with him for a moment.

"He says that he won't be able to contact you anymore but he said, "You hit the nail on the head with the story.""

"Okay?"

"He also said to keep Gadreel away from them." He looked at them through the glass. "They have a bit of a past together and it wouldn't go well if they met again."

"Alright. So I won't let them come over. Oh and Cas, he's human now."

"Human?"

"Yeah, he lost his grace a few nights ago fighting a few demons. Don't worry, I've been taking care of him, but I don't know what to do with him. He wants to stay with me."

"Let him."

"Is that a good idea?"

"He is looking for a new start, you can give him that. You did for me." He smiled to himself. "He needs it."

"I can tell." He was just about to leave when I asked, "Cas, was everything real?"

"In a sense."

"Am I really connected to Lucifer?"

"I don't know." He answered then left. I went back inside and had a coffee with the boys then got ready to leave.

"I have to get some food, the house was empty, but I'll see you guys before you leave?"

"Yes," Sam answered. "We'll be around for a while."

"Yeah, we got a pack of wolves or something around here to find." Dean explained.

"So be careful."

"Can do."

"Hey, where can we find you?"

"Oh, uhh… my uncle's house is 45 Mallard street. I've got the place locked up good so call first."

"Will do." Sam said. I hugged them again then headed out into the falling snow and got food.

"Did she seem like she was hiding something to you?" Sam asked his brother in the car.

"Yeah, and the way Cas pulled her aside like that. Seems odd."

"Yeah it does. Should we stop by later?"

"I'd give her day, but yeah we should make a visit." Dean agreed.

"I'll have her text us tonight before bed, just to be sure."

I was home soon enough with food and the door was opened the second I made it to the porch. Gadreel took a few bags from me and helped get it all to the kitchen.

"Thanks, I got a little of everything for us. Enough to get us through this week at least." He looked at everything I took out of the bags and inspected it. "Are you hungry now?"

"Yes," he answered.

"Alright, I can make you something." I got out a box of mac n' cheese and a pot of boiling water. I cooked it and got him a bowl.

"You are not eating too?" I wasn't hungry after the café.

"No, I'm fine." He followed me with his bowl to the living room where I turned on the TV. "What did you do while I was gone?"

"I looked around and put up a few more sigils." So nothing, I thought to myself.

"Those clothes are for you." I pointed to the pile then changed the channel to the ever on SVU. He was done with his food quickly then went through the pile. "Hope those work."

"Thank you. They will be just fine." He pulled one up, a long sleeved black shirt.

"Gadreel, what do your wings look like?" I asked randomly.

"My wings?"

"Yeah. I mean, I've been around angels for a few months and I've never seen their wings."

"You cannot, they are like our grace, hidden in these forms."

"But you do have them?"

"Yes, all angels do."

"Would I?" He looked at me with curiosity.

"You are not an angel."

"Oh," For some reason I always felt like I did somehow. Like they were there and I couldn't see them. It was silly and untrue, but finding out that I was part angel made it seem real. Gadreel looked sorry for answering truthfully when he saw my reaction.

"You have something better," he brightened up.

"What's that?"

"Independence. You do not need anyone. Angels are always in need of another. Loneliness drives us to do things we wouldn't normally do. And you have free will. You never need direction. You have your own. Angels envy you for that."

"Angels envy humans?" I asked, skeptical.

"Yes," he had a slight smile on his face after cheering me up.

"Well now you're one of us. You can make your own decisions."

This looked to frighten him. "I don't know how. I've always been told what to do."

"Not anymore. You need to find something, a goal or something you want and aim for it."

"What do I want?"

"That's up to you."

"And people can do this all by themselves?"

"No," I smirked. "Many people don't know what to do with themselves. Hell, I didn't until all this happened."

"What is your goal?"

"That is for me to know." I stood and took his bowl. We watched TV together until it got late. I then headed to the shower and changed into my night clothes. I found Gadreel on my bed looking at my phone.

"This is for communication?"

"Yes," I said and took it from him. "And it is rude to go through personal things like phones."

"I meant no harm."

"I know," I softened my tone and sat down beside him. I noticed the pile of clothes was now on my floor. "Why don't you put on something to sleep in, normally we change into clothes that we only sleep in. Like these." I dug out and handed him a short sleeved black undershirt and a pair of gray sweats. "They are more comfortable." He took them and started to change right in front of me. That was of no surprise, so I turned my head until he was done.

"Why do you shy away from me when unclothed, or only change in separate rooms?"

"It is a silly thing that we do, especially with other sexes. We are naked and it is almost considered taboo. I don't particularly mind but it is a habit."

"Should I leave next time?"

"If you like," I opened up my laptop on the bed and said, "Gadreel, I've been meaning to ask you, but why are you protecting me. There are so many people that demons are after."

"Gabriel came to me. He knew that I was lost and told me that he needed help. That someone was in danger. He told me it was someone important." He said as if I was special. I blushed slightly.

"So he led you to me?"

"He told me where I could find you and that Samael was after you."

"Samael?" He buttoned up then, as if he wasn't supposed to tell me that. "Who is that?"

"I was told not to tell you that." His face fell.

"Samael," I typed it into the computer and found results immediately. I found that this angel was the archangel of death and protector of the fifth heaven. He was also a guardian angel at some point. "The archangel of death?! Are you kidding me! Gabriel couldn't bother to let me in on who was hunting me?!"

"He told me you would do this."

"What freak out? Yeah I should. This isn't just any angel, it's the damn archangel of death!"

"That is why I am here."

"No offence but even you said it, you're human. What could you possibly do to help me?" He looked offended.

"I am trying! I spend most of my days here trying to think of something I can do. Gabriel didn't give me any direction. I was just thrown here with you and told to do my job. I've done my best so far!" he shouted.

"I understand that but when he finds me we need a plan!" I yelled back.

"I am working on it!"

"Good, you do that." I stomped out of the room and down the stairs.

"Where are you going?"

"I need a breath. Stay here," I demanded "It's hard enough keeping myself out of trouble." I muttered to myself as I threw on a shawl and headed out into the snow.

It was nearing midnight and there was still no text or call from Satine. The boys had been waiting in their room for a few hours while doing some research.

"Dean, I think it's time we call it."

"Give her another half hour." He said through a sip of beer.

"She might not have another half hour."

"What time is it?"

"Twelve, she should have called or something by now."

"Alright, let's go." They headed over in the impala and sat outside the apartment for a few minutes watching carefully. They were about to go in when they saw someone open a curtain in the front window.

"Who's that?" Sam asked looking through binoculars.

"Not Cas or Gabriel, that's for sure." They both grabbed a blade and headed to the building. They didn't knock before trying the door. It was locked so Sam tried picking it before Dean pulled him back and kicked it in. They walked in quickly without flashlights. The hall and stair lights were on giving them some ability to see the figure running at them with an angel blade drawn. He stabbed a few times before Dean was able to get him to the ground, losing his blade.

Dean got a good look at him before saying, "Gadreel?"

"What the hell?"

"Where is Satine?!" Dean yelled and put his blade to Gadreel's throat.

"I don't know. She left a while ago and hasn't come back." He said honestly.

"What are you doing here?"

"He's the one after her." Dean said and plunged the blade into Gadreel's shoulder while he braced himself.

"Ahhh! Stop," he panted below Dean. "Stop," Blood poured out of his shoulder as Dean removed the blade.

"How are you not dead?" Sam asked.

"I'm human." He growled, blood dripping from his lips. "I am here to protect her."

"Why? Why would she need heaven's outcast to protect her?"

"You just said it." He stilled grumbling in pain.

"Dean," Sam pulled his brother off the former angel.

Gadreel got up and held his shoulder. "Gabriel asked me to protect her now that he can't."

"Now? He's been dead for a while. How long have you been with her?" Sam asked.

"A few days. The angels were sensing that she was with him and he knew they'd never with me." He took in a heavy breath. "I may need your help. She left a few hours ago after-… I don't know how to find her."

"I can track her phone." Gadreel held it up to Sam.

"She left it with me."

"Satine," Dean growled.

"Great," Sam sighed.

"She's in New York still," they heard after a fluttering behind them.

"Cas," Dean said,

"I know where she is but she needs our help."

"Did—…" Gadreel started, fearfully.

"No, it's someone else." Cas put a hand on both brothers and popped them into a brightly lit lobby with clean white walls. A dark haired woman sat behind a desk next to a fogged glass door. Cas was gone a moment later then back again with Gadreel. The woman looked up then said something into a Bluetooth. Seconds later a few angels came out with blades and circled them.

"This was not thought through." Cas said to himself.

"Ya think?" Dean muttered as screaming came from the other room.