A Modern Gang (Incomplete) Chapter 13: Boy's Games - Part 1, a sherlock fanfic

I know, I know, I'm a terrible person... SORRY BUT NOT SORRY! Just kidding, I'm really sorry for the delay. Lack of inspiration. Still a problem for chapter 6. It's so hard to write deductions which seem plausible (at least for Sherlock). This plus holidays in a place without internet and cable TV, awful! Back home, more time to write (probably, who knows...), and again, apologies. Don't forget to review and comment!

Musics: Why don't you try to guess? Have fun!

01:00 PM (Kitchen)

"Afternoon! Are we late?" Lestrade entered the flat, putting several plastic bags on the kitchen table. John and Sherlock jumped on their seats when the bags hit the table with a large thump. "Sorry. Am I interrupting?" He only then noticed the duo was having lunch.

"No. You came just in time. Where's Mycroft?" John cleaned his mouth with a napkin and shook hands with Lestrade. "Please, have a seat."

"Thank you. Mycroft is coming, I think. He was having some trouble bringing the rest of the staff upstairs."

"Wait a sec! Mycroft's doing legwork? I gotta see that!" Swallowing the rest of the apple's juice, Sherlock ran to the living room. "Where's my phone?" One of the TV members pointed at the skull on the mantelpiece. "Thank you, whatever your name is."

"It's Charlie."

"Don't care." Sherlock picked up the mobile, a false smile covering his face.

"Mr. Watson always complains about me."

"Oh! Yeah! You're the one who keeps calling him the wrong thing." The detective approached the young man, their faces inches away. "It's Dr. Watson. Not Mr. Watson. We understood?"

"Ye… Yes." Sherlock backed away, disappearing on the stairs. John's hand found its way to his face. In turn, Lestrade shook his head, arms crossed over his chest. The cameras turned to the hall of stairs when a huge laugh was heard.

"Look at you! You're sweating more than anyone would while running a marathon! This is so going to Youtube. I can see the name of the video 'Fat British Government: Trouble with House Chores." A pause. Mycroft looked at him, his usual cold stare gone, replaced by a suffering one. "I'll think in a better one. God, this is so precious."

"Sherlock, if you post the video on that Youtube thing, you'll go to jail." The eldest Holmes settled the bags on the bottom of the stairs, grabbing his wet handkerchief.

"You serious? Like I give a damn." The dark-haired man took his eyes from the camera phone, looking directly at his brother. "Keep moving. There's only a sixteen step distance between you and Lestrade. Remember John's there? He told me about that 'jumping' move."

"GET AWAY FROM HIM! GREG, I'M COMING!" Mycroft grabbed the bags and climbed the stairs the fastest he ever did in his lifetime.

"Greg? Wasn't it Gavin?" Suddenly left alone, Sherlock shrugged and prepared himself for the 'fun'.

01:30 AM (Living Room)

"Are you still doing digestion?"

"Yes."

"What about now?"

"Greg, for the last time, it only passed half an hour. It takes THREE hours."

"Ok."

"Just because we can't play Twister, it doesn't mean we cannot play another thing. What else you got?" John moved close to the Inspector, trying to see what was in the bags. However, Lestrade wouldn't let anyone but Mycroft see. 'It's a surprise' he'd say. An evil smile appeared on his face.

"Tell me, Sherlock. Do you know what RPG is?" The detective sighed and gave a bit to a biscuit the DI brought.

RPG

"The Glorious Team walks straight up to an abandon castle. You try to open the door, but it's locked. What do you do?"

"I'll turn around and leave."

"Sherlock!" Greg shot John a harsh glare. "I mean, Blue Wizard! You must stay with us. You're the only one who can pick the lock of the door. Please."

"Why doesn't the Troll knock it down? He's MASSIVE after all." Sherlock pointed at his brother and throw his arms far away from each other. A huff was heard.

"It's not my fault! It was the only character left! I preferred to be the narrator." Mycroft tilted his upper body in direction of Sherlock, whose tongue was stretched out of his mouth. "Oh no! I'm so scared! What are you going to do? Spit all over me?"

"You wanna play?! Let's play." Sherlock rolled the dice, smiling at the number.

"Yes! I, Blue Wizard, use my powers to create a storm. Bolts are forming! Ah! One hits the Troll right in the head! Muahah!"

"That's how you want to play? I shall not disappoint you." Mycroft also rolled the dice.

"Actually, I, the Troll, am not hit by the lightning! With the magic armour of the beloved princess Ursula, I riposte the thunder to the end of Earth! After that, I call my family of trolls and all of them start attacking the Blue Wizard!" Mycroft ends his epiphany, drinking a sip of water. Sherlock furred his eye brows, thinking deeply. This time, he didn't roll the dice.

"I, Blue Wizard, don't run away! I keep on the exact place where I was. I wait for the trolls. When they get too close, a net coming from the ground imprisons them all. I point my wand at the net. A flash of light comes out it! Every single one dies burnt and crisp." Sherlock looks up, imagining the entire scene with great enthusiasm.

"But I'm not given to family compassion! So I take the sword of the Knight John and attack the Blue Wizard!" Mycroft joined the hands together, pretending to agitate a blade.

"I dodge all the attacks, because I am a secret ninja!" Sherlock stood up with a jump, moving slowly around the room, lowered. Lestrade looked rather confused. He got a sheet in the middle of the thousands he had and read it.

"Hmm… Sorry Sherlock, but you didn't write anything about being a ninja in your background. In matter fact, you just wrote 'The only Blue Wizard in the world working with a fucking Troll.'

"So what? Just because I'm a sorcerer I can't be a ninja?"

"Exactly" Greg nodded and John joined him. "If you're going to play, you play by the rules."

"That's not fair!"

"It means I won!" Mycroft got on his feet and laugh at Sherlock.

"Hell no! I, Blue Wizard, cast a spell at the Troll! He gets smaller and smaller and then I step on him!"

"I, the Troll, use a potion another princess gave to me and get bigger than the Wizard! I punch him over and over!"

"But then I cast a spell on myself! I get even bigger than the Troll! I kick him in the ass to the moon!"

"I get in a spaceship and make in land on you!"

"STOP!" The brothers ceased their discussion and faced the Inspector and the doctor, who shouted together at them. Both had a very angry look on the faces. Greg got closer to Sherlock and told him to go eat some biscuits he brought while changing the game. John instead moved toward Mycroft and whispered close to his ear.

"If you ever stole my sword again, you'll regret it."

Karaoke (Sort of…)

Sherlock came from the kitchen, sitting on the couch next to John. Lestrade and Mycroft were setting the next games structure. John hoped this time things wouldn't get so far.

"So, I have this idea. It's a sort of karaoke, but it's not karaoke." Greg passed his fingers through his rough hair. "One of us chooses a part of song and another one sings it. Those who don't sing or choose the song are going to try to find out what the song's name is and what the band that plays it is."

"That sounds great. The problem is that these two here" John pointed at the Holmes brothers "barely know a popular music, much less know how to sing it."

"I'm not taking that as an offense."

"You better not, Sherlock."

"But there is no problem! The singer will be listening to the music instrumental through earphones and will be the only one reading the lyrics!" Lestrade cheered up and clasped his hands together. John also did it. "So, who's first?"

Greg was the first. John was the one who chose the song. That means it were Sherlock and Mycroft who had to find out the artist and the song's name. Lestrade put the earphones and grabbed the microphone. The Holmes sat behind the TV while John was next to the Inspector. Trying not to look embarrassed, the DI observed the music John picked. He just could be fucking kidding him…

Big blue eyes,

pointy nose,

chasing mice,

and digging holes.

Tiny paws,

up the hill,

suddenly

you're standing still.

Your fur is red,

so beautiful,

like an angel in disguise.

But if you meet

a friendly horse,

will you communicate by mo-o-o-o-orse, mo-o-o-o-orse, mo-o-o-o-orse?

How will you speak to that h-o-o-orse, h-o-o-orse h-o-o-orse?

WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?!

Jacha-chacha-chacha-chow!

WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?

Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!

WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?

A-hee-ahee ha-hee!

WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?

A-oo-oo-oo-ooo!

WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?!

The part of the song John chose reached its end. Greg stopped singing and looked hopefully at Sherlock and Mycroft. However, all the hope vanished as soon as he saw the mouths gaped and eyes widen. John started laughing and fell from the couch. "Oh, come on! It wasn't that bad! Mycroft, who sings the song?" Lestrade gave a smirk.

"I don't know. A dying cat?" John laughed louder, his hands on his stomach.

"Please! Stop! I can't hold too much longer!" The cameras were all pointed at him. Best episode ever.

"Hold what? It's your fault! You picked this song because of what I texted you yesterday!"

"GOD! I CAN'T ANYMORE!" John crawled to the kitchen, pouring water in a glass. Sherlock seemed to wake up from the trance on that moment. He got the remote and gave it to Lestrade. Picking it, the DI observed as the young man got the microphone.

"I'm next."

When John came back, everyone was waiting for him. He looked astonished at Sherlock, seeing that he was next. The doctor sat next to Mycroft and waited for the show to begin. Man, that was a hell of a show.

Don't do love, don't do friends

I'm only after success

Don't need a relationship

I'll never soften my grip

Don't want cash, don't want car

Want it fast, want it hard

Don't need money, don't need fame

I just want to make a change

I just wanna change

I know exactly what I want and who I want to be

I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine

I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy

Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no

One track mind, one track heart

If I fail, I'll fall apart

Maybe it is all a test

'Cause I feel like I'm the worst

So I always act like I'm the best

If you are not very careful

Your possessions will possess you

TV taught me how to feel

Now real life has no appeal

It has no appeal

Once again, the song ended and this time there was no laughing, just silence. Everyone was shocked. If they thought Sherlock was a good musician, he was a thousand times better singer! That deep voice mixed with the music notes was something special. Lestrade got up and clapped. Suddenly, the rest of the people (including TV team) did the same and whistle. As every good artist, Sherlock bowed, a wide smile plastered on the face. In the end, no one said who was the artist or the name. He passed the mike to Mycroft, whishing good luck. He was the one who was going to choose the song. It was going to be anything but priceless…

As soon as he started reading the lyrics, Mycroft sighed. Sherlock was gonna pay.

Talk to corporate (like a boss)

Approve memos (like a boss)

Lead a workshop (like a boss)

Remember birthdays (like a boss)

Direct workflow (like a boss)

My own bathroom (like a boss)

Micromanage (like a boss)

Promote Synergy (like a boss)

Hit on Debra (like a boss)

Get rejected (like a boss)

Sallow sadness (like a boss)

Send some faxes (like a boss)

Call a sex line (like a boss)

Cry deeply (like a boss)

Demand a refund (like a boss)

Eat a bagel (like a boss)

Harrassment lawsuit (like a boss)

No promotion (like a boss)

Fifth of vodka (like a boss)

Shit on Debra's desk (like a boss)

Buy a gun (like a boss)

In my mouth (like a boss)

Mycroft finished the song, Sherlock showing his teeth with a big smile. Moving closer, the dark-haired man grabbed his brother's shoulders, shaking them slightly. The smile grew more. "If you want, I can give an end to the music. The 'boss' ends up dea-" Mycroft put a hand on Sherlock's mouth, pushing the young man far away from him. Though, he turned again at his little brother and gave him a maleficent grin. He picked the remote and aimed at the TV.

"You made a great mistake, dear brother. Now, John Watson will have to truckle to the consequences." John began to sweat. Cursing Sherlock, he faced the naked true. It was his turn.

The doctor put the earphones on. He then took the microphone from the flatmate and stared at the TV. There was no way it could be happening to him. The reputation of an era would suddenly be reduced to nothing more but ashes. Although he knew the song was describing him, John also knew people would not see it that way. It was going to look like he was jumping on Sherlock this time.

Superstar, where you from? How's it going?

I know you, got a clue, what you're doing

You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here

But I know what you are, what you are, baby

Look at you, gettin' more than just a re-up

Baby you, got all the puppets with their strings up

Fakin' like a good one, but I call 'em like I see 'em

I know what you are, what you are, baby

Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer

Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer, baby

You, you, you are. You, you, you are

Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer (Womanizer)

Boy, don't try to front

I, I know just-just what you are, are, are

Boy, don't try to front

I, I know just-just what you are, are, are

(You) You got me going

(You) You're oh so charming

(You) But I can't do it

(You) You womanizer

Boy, don't try to front

I, I know just-just what you are, are, are

Boy, don't try to front

I, I know just-just what you are, are, are

(You) You say I'm crazy

(You) I got you crazy

(You) You're nothing but a

(You) Womanizer

Daddy-O, you got the swagger of a champion

Too bad for you, you just can't find the right companion

I guess when you have one too many, makes it hard, it could be easy

Who you are, that's just who you are, baby

Lollipop, must mistake me you're the sucker

To think that I, would be a victim not another

Say it, play it how you want it

But no way I'm never gonna fall for you, never you, baby

Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer

Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer, baby

You, you, you are. You, you, you are

Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer (Womanizer)

None of the reactions in the room was the same. Mycroft got his revenge and he made no question in hiding so. All his body was clearly showing how enjoyable the situation has been. Lestrade couldn't decide he should be on his lover's side or John's. Sherlock was so red it was extraordinary he hadn't melted yet. The TV people had all sorts of responses. But any of them was as good as the blogger's. His face was a complete mixture of colours.

"Perhaps we should change game?" Lestrade got up and reached for the bags for the third time. And it was still three…

Battleship

"Well, as we are four and the game is just for two, we'll take turns." The DI placed the game on the coffee table in the middle of the room. The group sat on the floor, the table small enough so they could be sat on the old fuzzy rug. "You all know the rules. Take down all the opponent's ships. I bet I'll regret it but who wants to play first?" Both brothers raised their hands at the same time. John pinched his nose.

"If you knew, why ask it in the same?"

Sherlock pulled the game closer to him, so he could place the ships. Mycroft sat across the younger Holmes and waited for him to finish putting the watercrafts. The detective only allowed his sibling to do it after him because he knew Mycroft was not a cheater. Many people would do this so they could take a glance at the other's strategy, but not him. Why would he? If he did so, there would be no fun beating Sherlock. When everything was ready, Mycroft made the first move.

"C3."

"Water. E5."

"Water. G4" Sherlock's hand was already grabbing a red piece when he listened to what his brother said. That was not right.

"What?"

"Water again? I really hate this game." Mycroft stretched an arm to get a white piece. He was debating with the hole where the piece should be put when Sherlock shout at him. The piece fell of his hand and the elder brother gave a disapproval look to the younger one. "Yes, it's my fault. What did I do this time?"

"First of all, I didn't say 'water' but 'what'. Second of all, you sharper!"

"Who, me?" Mycroft actually sounded and looked offended. "Why?"

"You're lying! I am damn sure I hit your freaking ship!"

"Oi! You know I do not cheat!"

"Not sure anymore!"

"You missed! You did not hit my ship!"

"Oh really?!" Sherlock got up and bended over so he could check Mycroft's game board. He couldn't believe his eyes. He missed completely! The closest ship was three lines above the spot he 'shot a missile'. Of course, Sherlock being Sherlock would not allow people to see him failing miserably and let his brother give him a see-I-told-you look. He would be dead before that happens. So he did what any person would do in a situation like this. Especially if that person's age is around eight years. He took one of Mycroft's watercrafts and placed it on the E5 hole. Sherlock shook his arms up and down once in front of his sibling's face "BOOM!" He then kicked the board of the table, the game flying through the living room and landing on the fireplace. "I want more biscuits. Anyone wants some too?"

Detective

Sherlock came from the kitchen with a plate full of almonds biscuits. He handed them to John, who declined. Shrugging, he buried on the brown leather couch, biting another one. Lestrade, already fuming from his ears, got a deck of cards, separating the ace of spades, the king of spades, the queen of hearts and the eight of hearts. He put the rest of the cards back in the box and shuffled the remaining ones. While he did it, Greg tried to explain in what the game consisted in. "This is a game I learned when I was little an-."

"BORING! Skipping to the part where you explain the rules…" Sherlock interrupted the inspector, the biscuits still on his hands and crumbs all over his clothes.

"I was getting there! Well, the ace is the thief, the king is the cop, the queen is the lady kisser and the eight is the victim. If you have the ace, you wink at anyone you want to 'kill'. Careful, if you wink at the cop you get arrested and the game's over; if you are the cop you need to find out who's the thief. In case the ace kills the queen and the eight before you can arrest him, the game's over; if you have the queen, you have to resurrect the victim, throwing a kiss toward him, but you can't revive the thief, no pouting Sherlock, nor the cop; and if you are the victim, you just stay there, waiting for the ace to kill you."

"Hold on. The ace shouldn't be a murder? He doesn't rob anything."

"Sherlock, the ace is a burglar. Period."

"But it's wrong an-"

"Shall we begin?"

Lestrade gave a card to each one and the men observed their cards. John was the cop, Greg the thief, Mycroft the victim and Sherlock… Sherlock was the lady kisser. Barely restraining his displeasure, the detective put his card down, not showing the front of it. The four men started looking at one another, Mycroft and Sherlock clearly knowing who was who. Apparently, the other two knew it too. Greg twinkled at Mycroft. The Holmes also put the card on the floor, displaying unnecessarily at everyone his card. The DI and the John blinked their eyes slowly at Sherlock, waiting for him to make a move.

"No way." He crossed his arms over his chest and closed the eyes. If he couldn't see them, they couldn't force him. Wrong Sherlock…

They pinched his arms and legs. Not working. Both thinking the same, they moved closer and closer. Time for the secret weapon. The grown men started to tickle Sherlock, the younger one breaking into a fit of laugher. How could it be possible so nice people being so bad people also? Feeling it was harder and harder to breath and finally remembering cameras were filming all of his moves, Sherlock gave up, and sent a small brief kiss to his brother through the air.

"Next game?"

Domino

It ended up with the pieces thrown out of the window, a closed and now broken window.

Mrs. Hudson threatened to increase the rent, again.

Chess

Holmes winners. John and Lestrade defeated. Cliché.

Three paws missing. A king without a crown. Two towers which are ruins now.

Twister

The so expected game.

Pure disaster.

The Royal Game of Goose

Only two hours after Sherlock eating a plate full of biscuits, John understood the food was drugged with amphetamines. Thence the detective being so out of himself. And so was the doctor. He whispered angrily at Lestrade, so that the cameras couldn't listen to them. The DI said it was for Sherlock to loosen up a bit. It would have been a bit if he didn't have eaten all of the biscuits.

John eventually congratulated Greg for what he did. Between mad Sherlock and sassy Sherlock, there was no doubt in which one to choose. Or so he thought so. By the end of the game, with the younger man's complete failure, perhaps a mad and not-so-bustling detective would have been a good an idea.

Stop

The TV team played it.

The four men completely exhausted, fell asleep fifteen minutes before. Mycroft and Greg were cuddled with each other on the big couch. John was snoring on his armchair, head resting on the cushion with the Union Jack. Sherlock was also sleeping on his black armchair, a huge grin on his face.

I had so much fun writing this chapter! Perhaps I'll write another one similar to this one, there are so many games! Any suggestions? I wanna hear everyone, even you, there in the darkness.

What about the songs? Got them right? Here's the list:

-Ylvis - What Does the Fox Say?

-Oh No! - Marina and the Diamonds

-Like a Boss (ft. Seth Rogen) - Thelonelyisland

-Womanizer - Britney Spears

Advice: read again while the music's on. Double fun!

Once again, I'm very, very sorrry. Hope this chapter compensates the delay. I think it is the biggest chapter so far!