Pre-interview jitters were a constant in his life. Since people started interviewing him after Katniss made it to the top 8 of the 74th hunger games he hadn't been able to shake these things.
He had received the job of rewiring and redesigning Panem's security system. And as usual the capitol press was hell bent on filming every moment of his life in so-called celebration. His PR manager had granted them an interview to get them off his back. He didn't want to but it was for the greater good.
The bright spotlights hit his face, and there on the beanbagesque chair sat Caesar Flickerman in all his glory. Gale approached him and as he was revealed to the audience, the ear-deafening cheers became roars.
"Ahhh. Gale Hawthorne. It's such a pleasure to see u again!" Flickerman remarked in his usual manner. "Yes, Yes, Caesar. It's a relief to see a familiar face in the changing times of Panem!" I replied with a fake smile plastered on my face. "Thank you for gracing us with your presence at Caesar Flickerman: Celebrity Tell-Alls". "Tell-All!" I mentally screamed. "I am going to kill Beatrice". "My pleasure, Caesar, my pleasure" I replied.
"I hear that you bagged the big job, Gale". "It is indeed my honour, Caesar to serve the citizens of this noble nation, and god willing I shall succeed in this endeavour". I was saying what my manager, Beatrice had instructed me to. How could it be in an honour for me to serve the very Capitol citizens who had drawn entertainment from the suffering of my neighbours, my friends and… my best friend.
I only took the job because the districts were in dire need of better security, because the rebellion may have improved governance but infrastructure had been majorly damaged. And many people had been left unemployed and crime rates had seen a major increase.
"I sure hope so, Gale. But, tell me is it all work and no play with a job like yours?" Caesar quirked an eyebrow. My mouth moved of it's own accord when I replied "It's not the job, Caesar. I don't want to have fun." "Such a handsome and intelligent lad like you doesn't want to have fun! C'mon, Gale. Tell us the truth" he pressed. I don't know why but my mouth had gone into auto-pilot now, something about Caesar's easy-going nature was making me say things I never dreamt of saying to anyone before. "I only ever wanted to have fun with one person and I could never have her" I replied quietly.
What had I just blurted out on National Television! Had I lost my mind!
"Am I right in assuming, Gale, that the person in question is Panem's very own Mockingjay?"
Mocking jay. The very word that lay at the foundation of the destruction of my relationship with Katniss. I hadn't talked about her or two her in one year, yet she was the reason nothing in life held any deep value to me anymore. The feelings and emotions of hurt and depression- that I sought to avoid at all costs by throwing myself into work—hit with full-force. I needed to talk, I realized, bottling up my emotions was not doing me any good. Thus the rarely seen irrational and emotional side of Gale Hawthorne decided to talk. On National Television.
"Is that even a question, Caesar? " I muttered quietly, but the capitol mike managed to pick it up.
He nodded understandingly. "You know, Gale, we never got to hear about you and Katniss. Tell us, did you guys start out as friends or," he paused to smile "or something more?"
"Neither. We barely could tolerate each other in the beginning. We just went with it because the daily haul was better and two's always better than one. But somewhere in the middle we started building a certain trust, an ease that I haven't been able to recreate with anyone else, till date. And she was such a great friend. Fiercely loyal, and unique in every aspect. "
"So what drove you to fall in love with her?"
"I'm sure the entire country knows about all the different kinds of beauty Katniss Everdeen possesses. Her outer beauty though, is nothing comapared to how beautiful she is on the inside. Caesar, I think the question is not "what drove me to fall in love with her" but "what didn't".
"I agree. That young lady is one of a kind."
"So what are your feelings towards Peeta Mellark?"
"If I could've then I would've hated Peeta with a passion. But Mellark's so overtly nice that it is exceedingly difficult to do so. So I guess envy is what I feel I feel towards him"
"Do u ever feel like you have somehow been wronged?"
"As much as I would like to believe so, Caesar, I can't blame anyone for the end of my friendship with Catnip, other than myself of course. I don't know the person she's become, let alone understand it."
The next few hours are a blur, soon I'm in my bed wondering if Catnip had watched the interview. Haunting dreams of grey-eyed, brown haired children consume me that night.