Ten's Lament

Clara

"You know he didn't mean it," Clara all but whispered as they walked toward the flats. "You understand that, surely. You've all just lost the TARDIS, the last remnant of Gallifrey, other than the fact it' in a pocket universe. But you're the only one that knows that, they don't. Doctor, you're all hurting, you don't blame him for speaking out of turn, right?"

Eleven turned to glance at her, a small half smile on his face. "I don't blame him," he stated, shaking his head slightly. "I went through a lot at that time in my life, but Ten needs help more right now."

"You're not usually this nice to yourself," Clara remarked.

"Yeah, I know. But we might have to live here for a little while, and if that's the case, I want to have people that I know can help figure this out," The Doctor explained, giving her hand a light squeeze.

"Speaking of that, we were brought here when you were about to regenerate. What happens when we go back, does that process start again?"

The Doctor sighed before planting a small kiss to the top of Clara's head. "I think so, whatever did this is suspending my regeneration, which in itself should be completely impossible, when it ends so do I."

Clara felt the tears build up behind her eyes, "I don't want..."

"Clara, please. Let's just... The time we have together, now, it's extra time. That's how I'm looking at it. Impossible, miraculous, extra time. Make the most of it while we can, eh?" Eleven whispered, letting his arm drape over Clara's shoulders before pulling her tightly to his side as they walked.

The inside of the flats bottom floor smelled badly of urine, and there were a few puddles on the floor that Clara and Eleven tried very hard to steer clear of. The sounds of Tens sobs were clear for the both of them to hear. Clara nudged Eleven in the side and pushed her slightly over to the other man before leaning up against the wall of the lobby area to observe them. Eleven gave her a small huff, as if he really did not want to have to approach his younger form, especially not to offer some form of romantic consultation. Clara rolled her eyes and shooed him away with one hand. Ten needed help, and having been through the pain that he was experiencing before, Eleven was the one most qualified to give it to him.

"It's not fair," Ten mumbled as Eleven approached, the latter of the two wringing his hands together slightly.

"Get's easier with time," Eleven stated sombrely, patting his younger selves shoulder lightly. "We move on, find new people. Trust me, Doctor, in time you will find it easier."

"But she doesn't even know me yet. I can't even talk to her, ask how her life in Pete's world is. Can't even..." Ten trailed off, shaking his head before yanking his shoulder out of the older Time Lords grasp. Eleven let out a long breath of air.

"You know, I don't remember any of this happening, and I'm sure you don't remember it from big ears point of view either. Do you know what that means?" Eleven questioned, leaning against the metal door of the elevator.

"The time lines... they're out of synch?" Ten retorted with his own question, narrowing his eyes slightly. Eleven nodded, a slight smile building on his face.

"Don't tell big ears. But after this, we don't retain it. Well, you two won't. I will being the latest in the line and all, but you, the other one and Rose. You won't be able to retain it." Eleven explained, the smile on his face widening as Ten's own face grew lighter in a smile of his own.

"But that means... Anything that happens here... I can talk to Rose? Tell her anything at all?"

Before Eleven could answer Ten's questions the door to the elevator that he was leaning on pinged open, his gangly legs couldn't stop him from falling over and much to Clara and Ten's amusement he toppled onto his bottom. Clara couldn't help the giggle, but she quickly rushed over to help him back up none the less. Eleven shot her a smile and kissed her on the forehead, Clara pulled him into a hug.

"Are you two?" Ten asked, clearing his throat noisily. The two broke apart instantly, blushes creeping up on both of their faces.

"Well... We... I mean..." Eleven babbled, his hands shooting this way and that in his confusion.

"No, why would you even think that?" Clara scoffed, knowing that the blush that was on her cheeks was betraying her immensely.

"Well you know, I guess you could always give it a shot, you never know, you two might not retain this either," Ten smiled, backing out of the elevator. "I'll take the stairs, who knows, might bump into Rose. There's a lot we need to talk about."

"Good luck, Doctor," Clara beamed, waving to the man. Eleven thumbed their floor, number three, and the doors slid shut smoothly.

Clara made sure to keep a step away from the Eleventh Doctor when they were inside the elevator. She couldn't have him getting any ideas about what the tenth Doctor had said, she wouldn't let that sort of thing happen between them. It wasn't that she didn't want to be with the Doctor, it wasn't that at all. On the contrary, she would have loved to have given it a go with the man. He was incredible, an alien that flew around time and space in a blue box and lived forever. But in that was the problem. He lived forever.

Whilst she would give him her forever, it was something that he would never be able to return. Inevitably she would wither, grow old, and die whilst he was still young He had made that point back on Trenzalore when he had sent her away the first time. He was almost eternal, living for thousands of years in a youthful state. Before he showed a grey hair she would already be long gone, the latest in a long line of companions that would never end. Clara Oswald would not let herself become just another star struck girl that the Doctor could leave behind in his wake, it wasn't fair on her and it wasn't fair on him. But when the Doctor took her hand, squeezing it lightly, she couldn't help but want to throw her sentiments away absolutely.