Kid leaned against the wall, eyes opened, and though it didn't appear to be a prayerful position, he was praying all the same on the inside. "God, I have no right to ask you for a miracle, but I've seen you grant them often enough traveling with Ruth. I don't want to live without her and I don't want to die without her either. I would rather be shot down than waste away to a pile of dried up bones. I guess there ain't no better time to ask for a miracle than Christmas Eve. Please, give me a sign that the consumption won't come back. I need a sign."

"You far away. Talk to great Father?" Nitis asked.

"Well, I was until you interrupted me," Kid said dryly.

Nitis didn't look sorry he'd interrupted. "Good. Need much help."

"Do I? Why would you say that?"

"Trouble in spirit."

He snorted. "That's about the size of it."

"You feel better if share what feel with Ruth."

"No, I wouldn't. I'm dying." It felt good to admit it to another living soul even if it may have been risky. "She can't fix that. A doctor can't fix it. Only God can and I have a feeling He's not going to. It wouldn't be right to subject her to what I'm going to go through. I'm going to become as helpless as a little baby before the disease is done with me. It ain't fair to ask her to stick with me through that."

Nitis didn't look surprised, which Kid thought odd, but maybe he was just good at hiding emotion. "I think you afraid."

"I am. I'm afraid for Ruth. She's a good woman and she didn't deserve this, but the annulment is going to be what's easiest on her."

"No, I think you afraid for you. So you leave. Not have to deal with hard things."

"You're crazy."

"I know love of woman. You not trust that love. Not trust Ruth. Not trust God."

"What do you know about God or any of it? Do me a favor, will you, and mind your own business." He left on that note. He didn't know where his feet was going to take him, but as long as it took him away from the crazy Indian, he didn't care.

sss

Ruth passed the day learning how to make ramilletes, paper flowers, from Señora Martinez. She enjoyed it because it took her mind off of Kid for awhile. Then she went down to the church with her chaperone to place the finished flowers in the church. The altar in the church was covered with other handmade flowers, all made by all the women in town. It felt less like a courtroom with the decorations and more like the house of God that it was, a fact Ruth was grateful for.

3 musicians played outside the church beside a lovely nativity that was surrounded by bright red poinsettias. Just two mandolins and a guitar, so nothing too fancy, but they made the sweetest Christmas music. Ruth could have stood and listened to them all day, but it was too chilly.

Supper was a spicy stew.

"It's a traditional Christmas meal," Señora Martinez explained, "but if you need something a little easier on your stomach."

"Nah, I'll give it a go. I ain't been sick any today, so my chances are good."

Ruth ate the stew though she didn't care for the level of spiciness. She knew Kid would love the dish if he were here. Señor Martinez, who showed up to the meal about halfway through, certainly shoveled it in.

She ate about half and finished up with bread. She didn't want to push it.

"You eat like a bird," Señor Martinez remarked.

"I make up for it at lunch. I don't think I'm likely to lose any weight anytime soon," Ruth said, patting her stomach.

Señora Martinez hid her smile behind a linen napkin.

A celebration called Las Posadas could be heard not long after the meal was over and she went out with the Matinezes to see it. She'd heard them singing the previous nights since coming to the Martinezes, but had avoided the festivities thus far, too upset to join in. Instead she had gone to her room to pray and study the Word, so this was the first night she'd come outside to see it for herself.

Ruth was dressed warmly with multiple layers. She even had her woolen shawl around her. She still bounced a little in the frosty air to keep warm.

She saw a candle in a paper lampshade leading the procession first. Then "María", played by an older girl, rode on a donkey with Joseph walking beside and guiding the burro. There were also plenty of angel and shepherds following and just general revelers.

Mary and Joseph spoke and though they spoke in Spanish, she could tell they were "asking" for a place to stay.

The Martinezes acting as innkeepers let them in for refreshments and prayer time. Afterwards, they joined the procession that ended at the church about an hour later.

There was more caroling as the crowd warmed themselves by the big bonfire outside the church until they would be let in for midnight Mass.

The Martinezes socialized with the other adults. Ruth knew they would have translated for her if she had wanted to join in the conversations, but she didn't feel up to it because she knew the whole town was aware of the case by now and there would be either pitying looks or looks of censure; it was bad enough seeing the looks from a distance without seeing them close too. And besides that, she was just feeling low and pessimistic and there was no need to be sharing that with others on what was supposed to be a joyous holiday to her way of thinking. It was also kind of nice standing off by herself because it felt like a breath of fresh air and freedom after basically being under house arrest.

Even though it was cold, she took off her glove to see the ring it hid underneath. She supposed she should take it off, she thought, as the firelight dancing on the metal, reminding her of the first Christmas she'd celebrated with Kid, but it was also her grandmother's ring, so she didn't. She put the glove back on and studied the crowd.

It was one of the most beautiful Christmas celebrations she'd ever witnessed even if it was one of the saddest for her personally.

She didn't expect to spot Kid there, but he was practically on top of her before he noticed her.

"I was just taking a walk. I didn't come to see you," he made clear to her right away. He didn't want her getting mixed signals, although after that kiss it was probably too late for that.

"I didn't think you had, but now that you're here I need to talk to you."

"I told you-"

"I know what you told me, but this ain't about us and it's not something you say between lawyers."

A child ran right in between them before Kid could respond.

"Lo siento," the boy called with a backwards glance, his feet still running. Another one followed the same path in pursuit of the first kid, jostling them again, and this boy didn't even bother to shout back an apology. Ruth smiled over it. Kid glowered.

"Those kids should be in bed," Kid complained. "They're just making nuisances of themselves."

"Oh, they're just having fun. What child wouldn't be wound up on Christmas?"

"I don't know about that, but I know it makes me doubly glad we never had any of our own."

"I wish you wouldn't say that."

"Why? Because you actually want one of those sticky, disobedient dwarves?"

"Because you're going to be a father."