A thanks to my reviewers and special thanks to wRiTeR'S bLoCK is AWFUL for giving me the spring boards for this chapter and the previous :) plot bunnies from you lot mean that I can write chapters faster, not that I can't get my own ideas but if you have ideas you like don't hesitate to mention them :)

To Chance

Alex

After Lily stopped crying into Lara's shoulder she simply looked at everyone around her. Her eyes when she had come in had been hollow and her thoughts distance and flat. I've never met anyone like that, it had scared me. It was like she was completely unaware of everything except a numbing fog around her. Lara could not stand that and had run at the poor girl and wrapped her arms around her best friend. Lily had simply broken down and collapsed on my sister.

Now though her eyes had some life in them, she was still recovering but there was the essential word. Recovering. She would get better. Her eyes took in all of us; we were all here, Lara, me, Sirius, James, Peter, Remus, Alice, Tabby and Amy. She simply looked around at us, with her puffy grieving eyes, and then she smiled a small smile. It was a sincere, grateful smile that said as clearly as her mind did that she was relieved we were here.

I looked around at my eyes rested on James. He hadn't moved, hadn't said a word. It was coming to my mind now that he had changed lately. I hadn't noticed, being so preoccupied with how I had changed and my new relationship with Siri, but it was there. Before Christmas he had practically skipped everywhere, or at least he had strutted everywhere but hell, they were hard to separate when it came to him. Sirius had been the same, him with his stupid little smirks and that look. He still did that now but this time it was an annoying smirk for me and that look, the one that had every bone in my body jumping, was directed at me...

Anyway...

James: that was what I was thinking about before.

He had changed. Something in him had hardened, had realised the reality of what was going on outside the walls of Hogwarts. He had always been an idiot when it came to Lily. I mean seriously, how hard is it to see that asking the girl out every single day is obviously not working? It didn't take a genius to work out that a steadfast person like Lily Evens didn't want to date a boy who was as immature as James pretended to be. It wasn't hard, was it? Now though I think something else had hit the boy, he hadn't asked her out once but settled to staring at her hour after hour as if thinking she would suddenly disappear. I knew very well what could happen when you realised living wasn't a guarantee. That one moment when I had believed Lara to be dead had shaken my whole perspective of the opportunities around me, of the fact we only had so many chances. Yes, that's what I think might be going around Prongs' head.

He stared at Lily as if he only had so much time.

It was clear to my senses that all he wanted to do right now was to be the one to comfort her. He would, that's what he would do. Lily needed someone right now, needed someone other than my sister. She needed us all. James would show her that he wasn't just an immature bloated head suspended on a strut.

At least he better... or I was going to stick said head into a bush, antlers and all...

Peter

I stood in the doorway of our dorm and ran my eyes over each bed in turn. To my left nearest to me was my bed, the covers bunched up at the end of the bed and all my clothes thrown carelessly into my trunk underneath. On my wall I had stuck various pictures of us Marauders, a proud statement that I was a part of their group despite everything. Next to my bed was Remus' which was as spotless as ever with all of his many books neatly lined up on the shelve he'd put up in second year. His bed was made flawlessly and even his shoes were all lined up at the foot. Impeccable, I had no idea how he kept it up. Next, in the middle of the room, though it wasn't always so, was James' bed. Basically, it was as messy as his hair on a Saturday morning before a planned Lily ambush. All of his clothes, books, shoes – everything – was everywhere. How he ever managed to find anything was a wonder to me but I suppose it didn't really matter to him if he couldn't find his homework or school books or the correct uniform. He was James Potter, rules slid of him like jelly on a spoon. He too had a photo of the four of us pinned to his wall, next to the one of Lily. Sirius' bed was pretty much the same as his brother in all but blood, only with the added mess of all the variety of hair products. That guy was vanity incarnate. All these beds were familiar to me; I had seen them every day for five and a half years, not including holidays. The same could not be said for the last bed.

Alex's bed was just as neat as Remus' though his own extensive book collection was in a large stack next to his bed in the corner which had to be balanced by magic. It wasn't tidy though, not really, because covering every wall and floor space was sheets and sheets of paper. It was an odd habit of his to sit in his bed writing and drawing in this sketchpad of his then ripping out the paper and sliding it onto the floor. I know my other friends had already asked him about it but he hadn't given much of an answer. I walked up to them cautiously. I had seen him in the mornings carelessly trampling over the layers of parchment; he didn't seem to notice them but I didn't want to walk over them in case he somehow knew. Who knew how that guy's mind actually worked...

I knelt down and studied them carefully. Most of them were random notes written in German like 'heißes Messer im Eis' and 'Ich brauche einen neuen Schal bekommen', who knew what they meant. Others were lists of random stuff in English, shopping lists or homework. In addition to the written stuff there were sketches: a candle, a house, an eye, the school hall. One was a long empty stone room which had long thin windows down one side which let in stripes of light. I picked up a detailed sketch of his sister in profile staring out of a window and overleaf was one of Sirius. It was incredible realistic, I could almost see the cheeky glint in his eye. I threw them to the floor again.

I was about to get up when I saw another sketch, this one pinned to the wall. Without thinking I walked to it and studied it closely. Like many of the note in the room this one was titled in German, something that kept sending distrust to my heart. Why did he use German? What was it that he wanted to hide? This one was elegantly noted with 'Wärme in den Kälte'.

"Do you like it?"

I span around and saw the man himself leaning against the door frame eyeing me. It sent shivers down my spine. There was something about the way he looked at me that made me feel he didn't trust me. Who was he to judge, he might have stolen my space in our group but he didn't know me.

I shrugged.

"You're a very good drawer"

I glanced at the picture again, seeing the four smiling faces looking up at me. He had worked a charm into it so that they waved back at the viewer. It was odd that he hadn't included himself, I'd always felt he had wormed himself into our group. So why did he not include himself in it?

"You think I am making myself a part of your group?"

I glared at him for stealing my thoughts but he simply shrugged as if it were nothing.

"You think I am taking your place"

I didn't answer but this didn't seem to surprise him. He studied me closely and I felt unnerved at his clear sharp gaze. It reminded me of Dumbledore.

"I am no Marauder Peter. I have no intention of breaking up your group - that is the last thing I want"

"You already have" I muttered against my will but it was out now so why shouldn't I continue "You and your sister, you've already broken us up. It used to be just us but now you've taken Padfoot and Lara's taken Moony and even Prongs will soon be with Lily. I am nothing, just the singleton in an odd number. That picture" I waved my hand at the drawing "That's not how it is anymore"

He continued to stare at me with his calculating gaze. I had never really liked him and his sister. That first time we'd met their eyes had skimmed over me as if I were nothing. The others had been so absorbed on new arrivals that they'd hardly spoken a word to me. I had never really felt that important, apart as a spare part or something, but now I was nothing. Then they'd found out Remus' secret and suddenly they were all over the others.

"If there is anything I've learnt about you lot" He interrupted my thoughts, he voice was hard now and almost irritated "It's that the most important thing to them is their friendship. You are right in some senses, me and Lara have perhaps broken down the time you lot spend as a group. Except you are also wrong because we can never become Marauders - that is a bond that has been formed over years. Just because they have found it in their heart to become friends with more than just their select group, Peter, doesn't mean the friendship you lot have as a group has diminished. James, Sirius and Remus will always be loyal to you if you are loyal to them."

Those words felt like a threat to my ears and I bristled myself but he had nothing more to say or hear as he stalked out of the room.

What did he know? When we left this school I would be on my own, just you wait and see. He and Sirius will go off and be all cosy and queer in their own apartment. Lara and Remus will move in together, getting married the week we leave. James and Lily will do the same and have about twenty kids. Me? I'll be there on my own with nobody to watch my back, nobody. They will all start fighting as a part of the resistance and probably get themselves blown up. Ha! Me fighting, yeah right. I've seen how Slytherins play it; we'd never stand a chance.

I looked back at the drawing of the four of us. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs.

It was a game.

Just a game...

Lily

People had been giving me the sympathy look. I had given them to others many many times and I had seen people give them to others. I hadn't realised how annoying they were. It was like they were coming up to me and saying "I know your parents are dead. I can't do anything about it but I feel sad on your behalf" it was a constant reminder that I was one of those people now that people felt sorry for. That there was something for them to feel sorry for.

I had escaped to the lake. Lara and Alice were a god send of course but sometimes I just felt like I needed space. Lara always knew when I wanted to be on my own and she always pulled Alice away who seemed to think that constant company was better for me. Bless her sugar coated heart.

It was still cold so that meant very few people were wondering around to give me the look. Now I was here though with the black expanse of the crystalline lake before me I felt unbearably lonely. Everything seemed to remind me of my loss. In the mornings the postal service reminded me that nobody outside school would ever contact me again. The way they made the scrambled eggs was completely different to how mum made them. That boy had exactly the same shade of hair as daddy. That girl was wearing a hair clip similar to the one Mum bought me. The carpet in the common room was exactly like the ones mum had dreamed of getting. Daddy always used to enjoy cracking the ice in puddle like that...

I saw Jam- Potter – walking along on the other side of the lake.

I remember mum saying...

He hadn't seen me and for once I wasn't sure if I didn't want him to...

"Oh, you must introduce me to that boy, you remember the one who..."

He had his hand stuffed in his jean pockets and he wasn't constantly ruffling that mess he called hair.

"The one who wouldn't stop annoying me at the station, yeah"

He was dressed in a simple dark blue turtle neck jumper that hugged his form. His eyes were down cast as he trudged through the frost grass.

"He was very sweet and awfully attractive, clearly love sick, I don't suppose-"

He looked up at the school and his face was pensive and cheerless, I wondered what was wrong.

"Mum! James Potter is an annoying little-"

He hadn't asked me out once since Lara and Alex got back. I remember the way he had sat in the medical wing staring at me as if...

"Ah but that's the thing with boys. Oh you should have seen what your father used to get up to..."

His eyes turned in my direction and I could see from his body language that he had noticed me. Usually at this point he would mess up his hair and give me a jolty grin before strutting towards me as if he owned the ground he walked on.

"No Mum. He never leaves me alone and every girl in the school thinks he's good looking"

He stood and looked at me. I waited for him to walk to me but he just seemed to become more depressed. Then he uncertainly raised a hand in greeting and sent a very small smile.

"I'd give him a chance; he's obviously doing it for your attention, not the others"

I thought of my mum's words then slowly waved back. Even from here I saw him blink in surprise and for the first time since I'd found out about my parents I felt the urge to laugh. Instead I grinned widely. James looked around uncertainly as if I were grinning at someone else and his denial that I might be acting towards him in a positive manner made me grin wider. He returned with a slow smile and then pulled his hands out of his pockets and then made a semi step forward but halted making him rock on his feet and nearly fall over. I couldn't help it this time I laughed joyfully at his indecision. He replied with his trademark smug smile but I could see there was a difference in this one; it was warmer, more genuine.

"After all, you don't know what you'll get till you give him ago"