Sorry this took a while :L
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To Hear
Severus
"Almost, you're not quite, but nearly, there, it just needs a little more concentration and practice, you're letting out thoughts."
"I'm trying" I growled out.
"I know" Lara said "and you're doing very well, it just takes time"
I gritted my teeth and calmed my thoughts again. I could almost feel the fog-like shape around my thoughts but I kept slipping, getting bored or something.
"Clear your mind and let the thoughts that come to the front of your mind sink away. Don't stop them from coming but don't acknowledge them. That's how you stop them from being visible." She said calmingly and I sighed and tried again.
It was relaxing, even if it was in the library with many people hidden around corners.
"Good, now when you feel my presence just lightly push it past you, raising a wall around you, as if you're redirecting a floating stick when it meets you as it comes to you on a river" her voice came to me through the haze.
Then I felt it, the gently prod on my thoughts, the unwelcome intrusion. I pulled my thoughts up around me and pushed it away with a grunt.
"Good" Lara said as I opened my eyes.
She was grinning at me and I rolled my eyes.
"You were being easy on me" I complained and she chuckled.
"Starting small and building up, better that way" she said "you did good, usually even that's pretty hard for a beginner"
"But I've been doing it for months!" I gapped at her.
"Yep" she smiled with a glint in her eye "and you're still an ickle newbie"
I grumbled.
Lara
Time moved with the speed of a train, flying past the days, unhesitant and unyielding. Weekends came then started again in what felt like hours till you couldn't recall which week was which because of the way they were wedged together. The weather got warmer without us noticing, the first years grew taller and more gangly as we watched, the exam preparations started before we realised they were coming.
Alex and Sirius had become gooey in their sweetness and I found more time in my full timetable to be with Remus.
Nothing had changed between me and Alex, we were still the same confusing joint personality and we still talked silently throughout the day but it felt different. It was like we really were two people now (almost), like there was something that distinguished ourselves as just us. Alex was engaged to Sirius, I was in a committed relationship with Remus. Alex and Sirius, Lara and Remus: that was us now, the separation we'd never had. Before, it had always been Alex and Lara, the Grey twins, us, we.
Remus and Sirius had noticed, I was sure, though it was hard enough for us to notice.
I still met up with Severus, sometimes dragging an unwilling Remus who would sit with us we studied. Severus was more conserved, cooler, when Remus came but he still bickered like he did before. He just never called me Lara or Larissa when he was there.
"Honestly Lara, are you thick?" He said with a scowl "it's spelt I.T.U.S not I.N.T.U.R"
"Sorry, Mr. Perfectionist, I've been at this essay for two hours" I bit back.
"At least I actually care about my grades. If you're bored go waste someone else's time"
"Humph"
He smirked.
"What's with Black and his girlfriend? They expecting a baby or something? They are absolutely disgusting these days" he asked with the customary sneer.
I lifted an eye brow and chuckled.
"Not exactly" I replied vaguely.
He rolled his eyes but I saw a small – oh so tiny – smile on his lips.
"They're just... going through a... transition" I added.
He snorted.
"Looks like they've been overdosed on Amortentia to me"
"Yes... they do seem to have that appearance don't they" I said thoughtfully with a fond smile.
One day Regulus came to me as I was walking to see Umbra. I had nearly forgotten about the younger Black after our engagement became null but it occurred to me now that he wouldn't know that. We hadn't let Sirius and Alex's engagement become public so of course Regulus would believe we were still being forced to wed.
"Larissa" He called and I looked up to see his dark figure in front of me.
He looked exhausted, large shadows under his eyes and his hair becoming slightly greasy. I frowned and slowed to a stop before him.
"Regulus Black" I said and he cringed slightly.
"We need to talk" he said, gritting his teeth.
I chewed my lip and stared out over the lake.
"Do we?"
He growled slightly and rubbed his face.
"Of course we do, think about it"
"I am"
"So you know we need to talk. If we're going to do this thi-"
"Which we're not" I said flatly and he looked up in annoyance.
"It's not like we have a choice" he said and his voice was oddly angered as his weird blocked thoughts buzzed like suppressed lightning.
I sighed. I could feel in my heart that I couldn't tell him about why we didn't have to; something just tingled in my chest at the idea. It had to stay secret... at least for a while. I didn't know why.
"We'll discuss this after the summer; I'm not going to argue about this. I have things to do" I said steely and he frowned, confused.
"After summer" he muttered as if something had laid heavily on his shoulders in an instance.
Then he had walked away and I had watched after him utterly confused.
Later as I sat feeding Umbra and stroking his leathery, but soft, head I found myself muttering to the large flying foal.
"What is it with him, Umbra, which makes me feel so damn uneasy?"
Severus
Lara fell into her seat but this time she was frowning, a lot. I cocked an eyebrow, unwilling to let her know of my concern – no, not concern – just... curiosity. It didn't take long to realise what was troubling her though when I saw the prophet sticking out of her bag.
Today had not been a good day for the resistance, there was a reason many of my fellow Slytherins were being particularly malicious today of all days.
"Why did you choose the losing side?" I found myself blurting out unceremoniously, I winced at the rudeness but Lara didn't seem to be offended as she should have been.
That was the think with Larissa; she never reacted quite the way you would expect, even now when I considered myself to be someone who knew the strange girl at least a little.
"Why shouldn't I have?" she asked - her voice entirely curious and sincere.
"… Because it's loosing?" I said slowly, well duh.
She studied my face for a moment but I had felt none of the mental probes I may have used had our places been reversed. Another thing about Lara.
"But what would I have gained by joining?" she said and the way she said it made me pause.
I knew the answer to that question, it was obvious, but when she said it she made me think I didn't really understand.
"Well... freedom... the control to do as you chose and responsibility in our society... and power" I replied slowly.
She cocked her head and perched her chin on her hands.
"Freedom? Freedom from what? Why am I not free now?"
I grunted and gritted my teeth.
"Because you have to stay in hiding from the Muggles. We all have to cower away from them even though we have the more power"
"But if you win then I will be under the power of the Dark Lord" she argued calmly and I admired her determination and surety. Even if it was all wrong.
"You wouldn't have to do anything" I said earnestly.
This time she levelled me off with a cool gaze that was as powerful as it was controlled.
"Apart from give up many people who I'm close to?" she said brusquely in the form of a question and a half concealed sneer.
"They don't belong" I clenched my jaw.
Damn her, damn this witch with her voice and opinion.
"Why not?" was her answer, fast and definite.
"They knew nothing about magic-"
"Knew. You said knew because they know now, they, the muggle borns you hate, know what it is to wield magic, sometimes better than the pure-bloods. I am pure-blood but there are muggle borns who know more magic than I, know more about a world I grew up in" she paused "Tell me, if the Dark Lord were to win then what would happen to Remus? He grew up in this world as much as you. What would happen to my brother, to Sirius, simply for their sexuality? They are both as pure blooded as you get. Tell me that they do not belong Severus... you can't. So what makes them the ones who would fall?"
We were silent and I twisted my tie under my fingers. This was stupid, I had my path, it's not like I could even join the supposedly 'light' side even if I wanted to (which I don't) because I knew firsthand the prejudice of Gryffindors. I glanced up at the girl before me who had sat opposite me countless times. No. No, that was not my path. Their side would lose, they would crash under the power of the dark lord and only those who had shown loyalty would be able to live at the top. It was not a matter of who was right, we had to do what we could for ourselves. They did what they needed and I did what I needed.
"We all have our own paths" I said coming to my conclusion and I saw something shift over Larissa's face.
She rose from her seat and slung her bag over her shoulder. She turned from me as I stared at her in confusion. Then she paused and turned to me. Her face was thoughtful and she met my eyes full on.
"Do you ever wonder why I approached you?" she asked and I blinked at the abrupt question.
"Yes, many times" though, I thought, I have not really paid it much mind.
She nodded slowly then her voice began and there was something poignant and slow, not quite hesitant for her voice was strong and sure, it would stick in my thoughts for weeks after I was sure.
"I would have saved you Severus, even had I not got to know you, if for no other reason than every person deserves to be saved" she paused and a pair of pale fingers reached up to twirl a strand of hair "I would save you, if I believed you wished to be saved"
I frowned.
"Saved from what?" I asked indignantly at the suggestion I was weak.
She stared at me hard and then blinked with the smallest smile.
"That, Severus Snape, is a question only you can answer"
Then she turned away and I was left sitting in more confusion than she had ever left me with.
Remus
"What are you doing this summer?" I asked Lara suddenly.
She looked up at me surprised, her lips forming a small O.
"Did I not tell you?" she asked shocked and I shook my head.
"Dumbledore arranged for Alex and me to stay with our cousin Andy ages ago" she said and I blinked.
"… Cousin Andy? As in Andromeda Black – Tonks, I mean?" I asked, remembering Sirius talking about her once or twice.
"Yeah"
"Isn't she Sirius' cousin too?"
She nodded.
"He's through Andy's dad, we're through her mum" She said as if this made perfect sense.
"Oh… okay…"
Darien
Regulus strolled over to my table in the common room and sat in the seat opposite me. The others watched him shrewdly as he crossed the room and I saw several whisper. Matthias Greengrass, who had been talking to me, clenched his jaw and stiffly turned away with a nod to me and Black.
"Well?" I asked tiredly.
"It's done, I tested it on Emma Tarner and it did exactly what we thought it would but we still don't know if-"
"There's no way to test that, either it will work or it won't" I cut in lazily.
I rubbed my temple discreetly. I'd been having the worst headaches these days, unable to sleep and constantly thinking of one of two things – or both at the same time sometimes.
"And if doesn't?" Regulus asked tensely.
"Then I won't go in and we hope nobody comes looking" I replied sternly and the boy worried his lip.
"They all think I'm going to fail, you can see it in their eyes" He said quietly.
"Yes but you won't" I said, trying to keep what bitterness I could out of my voice.
He caught it, knowing too much already, and smiled grimly in agreement.
Sirius
I grinned as I left the examining room with James, having just taken the Charms practical exam – our last exam. That had been easy! Honestly, you'd think they'd actually try and give some challenging spells but no – avis! Ha! Talk about easy! Take that Flitwick– you said my birds were too purple!
"That's it! We're free! A year until anymore exams Paddy!" Prongs cried letting out a whoop.
I looked around and saw Alex leaning up against the marble staircase. I smiled when he saw me and I paused, sticking my hands in my pocket to survey the handsome silver head.
"HEY! Lils, are you going to the lake? Can I come-?" James called like a loon, disappearing into a group of people.
I shook my head as I watched the messy head of my best friend bob through the other people.
I strolled over to my waiting fiancé and he immediately wrapped an arm around my waist. He rested his forehead to mine and I shut my eyes happily.
"Hey" Al whispered.
"Hey"
He chuckled.
"Good exam?"
"Avis, Aguamenti and Imperturbable: easy"
"Of course, what could get in the way of the O student if a total disregard for rules and homework doesn't do the job?" Al teased and I gently hit him over the head.
"And what about you?" I asked curiously.
Alex and Lara had been in separate rooms in a different part of the castle due to the fact they were Legilimenatus. A ministry official had to come in to put Occlumency charms around them for the duration of all of their exams so they couldn't cheat by hearing the answers from other students, the examiners or each other. I hadn't seen him all day.
"Okay" he said shrugging but I knew he must have done brilliantly, him and that sister of his were stupidly intelligent.
"Hmm... how about we go up to the dorm and celebrate?" I whispered, pressing a kiss to his lips (ignoring the sound of sighing girls behind me).
I heard him take in a harsh breath, something he'd been doing more often. I grinned.
"Hmm... I'm sure we could fit that into our tight schedule" he breathed back.
I chuckled.
"I hope you know your schedule is going to be very full once I have a proper ring on that finger of yours" I replied, nibbling his bottom lip.
He chuckled and I felt the very vibrations travel through our connecting chests.
"Not as full as yours, lover boy"
Severus
I approached my dorm room slowly that evening. Everybody was downstairs at dinner but I wasn't hungry, I was thinking. I was thinking about the offer. That offer that many of us got in this house of snakes. It was an honour, something I had been planning for this for years. We were all going to do this, Nott, Rosier, Avery, Wilkes… all of them. I had been waiting and finally, this morning, I had been given the message. I had almost grinned there and then at the table but as I thought to something fell on my heart like ice.
It was always the same.
I had never cared about the things I had done to my fellow students till I saw the frown that crossed Lily's face. I had never felt any guilt for the spells I had created till that time Lily had taken my potions and note books and deciphered the meanings behind the darkest. I had never doubted my path in life till I remember it was Lily who stood on the other side. I had been sure I would become just the same as the others if it hadn't been for her.
Then she'd pushed me away and nothing was there to make my choices. I was ready, I was willing.
Wasn't I?
"Your opinion was not based on the facts but prejudices"
I scowled because there was the second route of my problem.
Lara Grey…
I had thought of that quote so many times in the most annoying occasions. Your opinion… prejudices…
"What makes them the ones who would fall?"
I frowned. Lupin, he was a werewolf, a monster who could kill – had nearly killed me – of course he could not becoming a part of this society. The other werewolves knew what they were, they didn't try to hide it, and they were useful to the Dark Lord. And Gray and Black? They were gay. They wouldn't help further the pure blood line; they were helping the decease of the great family names...
"Every person deserves to be saved"
No, some people didn't deserve to be...
Anyway, it was impossible to save everyone and sometimes saving someone was not for the good of the people...
"I would save you, if I believed you wished to be saved"
She hadn't approached me again, I had left her seat empty and had returned to the library at the undeclared times we met up.
It was funny... that it was we now. She still annoyed me... I think, but I had got used to the presence of the girl, the friendly banters. Yes... you could say we were friends...
That was even stranger, Slytherin's didn't have friends, as a rule, it was too risky. I had had Lily yes, but I was different. Yet Lara Grey had become my... close friend.
I rubbed my head.
"I would save you"
Cynthia
The house elf named Cyndi came to me one evening as I sat in the chair by the window watching the sun set. She, who I had grown up with, whispered frantically in my ear as she tried not to twist her ears in punishment, though really she'd done nothing. No, because Cyndi was different. Cyndi was my elf, she was a Rosier elf, not a Grey elf, something Alexander had forgotten. I listened to her squeaky voice impassively, calmly, without changing a muscle in my face.
When she finished I rose from my seat and my eyes narrowed as my hands clenched at my side.
"Thank you Cyndi. This weekend, we'll do it this weekend, you know the plan" I said coolly.
The elf nodded rapidly and her large ears flapped before she hurried away with a pop.
"This weekend…" I whispered to myself and, despite the anger boiling in my chest and the fear I had for my daughter, I smiled a small wicked smirk.
I looked up now at the blooming stars and they glinted down to me: Yes. Yes, they whispered in confirmation, yessss….
"Here I come, ready or not"
Sirius
I was awake; the sheets were warm around me but not as warm as the body of my fiancé next to me. He was still sleeping, which was odd because usually my very being awake would draw him into the realm of waking. Usually his innate ability to hear other's thoughts would mean that any buzzing mind would draw him out of his own dreams. Usually... but it had been an hour, at least, or so I thought, and still he slept in my arms.
He was wrapped up in his dreams tightly and he squirmed slightly in my arms. He was beautiful, truly beautiful, this man. His silver, fine and weightless, hair was tousled and his lips softly parted. He groaned and I stilled with a frown.
He shook his head and his face creased into a frown, his face was pink... flushed.
Suddenly his eyes were snapped open and his hand sprung to his lips before I could even utter an exclamation of shock he was tumbling out of the bed and staggering away. I blinked, mouth agape, then quickly jumped up, grabbing both mine and his sleeping gown before running after him.
I followed him into the bathroom and saw him on his knees emptying his stomach into the toilet. I rushed without faltering to his side and lifted his hair from his face as he continued to puke. My thoughts were running a hundred miles an hour, worry being the most predominant.
Eventual he calmed and slumped, exhausted, against me. I held him close and rubbed his back, my heart thrumming with concern.
"Ugh..." he groaned and he lifted a hand to press against his temple "S...Siri...? Is that you?"
I froze in shock, though I knew not why such a statement had me feeling so scared.
"Yeah Al... it's me. We need to get you to the Hospital wing... you probably ate something..." I replied, frowning in scrutiny.
"Ugh... my head Siri... there's something..." he blinked and moaned in pain, lifting another hand to grasp his head.
I bit my lip and shifted so I had an arm around his waist. Pomfrey, she'd know what to do, she had to... we were going home today...
Thank Merlin Al is organised and is already packed.
"C'mon Al... hospital... Pomfrey..." I gasped out as I pulled him to his feet.
Damn this boy was heavy.
He was an almost dead weight in my arms, seeming to be unable to hold his own weight. I grunted but luckily help was at hand because not long after the door swung open and Lara stood in the door way with a worried expression.
"Alex?" she said in confusion and Al jumped nearly out of my arms in shock... well... he nearly fell out of my arms more like.
"L-L-Lara?" he stuttered in fear and my brow puckered in confusion.
Lara ran forward and took Alex's face in her hands so they were staring eye to eye, both in shock.
"Oh Merlin Alex. Oh Godric" Lara said and my head whipped between the two, completely confused.
"Sis- Sister?" he voice was fearful "Why? Why c-cant I hear you? Why... Wh-why can't a he-hear anything?"
