Middle Earth Virtual Tours
Disclaimer: See first chapter.
Author's Note: Thank you for the reviews, Mirlasse, Aria Breuer, horseyyay and OneSizeFitsAll!
To Mirlasse: Erestor is unfortunately stuck with the horrible job of informing Thranduil and Denethor of what their sons had been chosen to do and is getting a headache from it. He gives his thanks for specifically wishing to see him, and invites you to the library for a cup of tea. The Author would like to tell you that she has indeed read the story you mentioned and enjoyed it thoroughly, though the idea firstly came to her because she was lazy to invent another minstrel's name. However, she has always been influenced by the fanfiction writer Erestor whenever she attempts humour stories because Erestor is just so good.
To Aria Breuer: The Author thinks so too! But The she guesses that it won't hurt to purposely impress upon this stereotype from the movie here, seeing as it is a parody. Thank you for your kind review!
To horseyyay: Thank you! You are very kind :)
To OneSizeFitsAll: The Rivendell cooks are extremely sorry for the slow speed; your meal will be served soon. To compensate for this, a special Rivendell cookie will be sent to you shortly. All destinations are available as long as three criteria are fulfilled: enough reservations, available on standard ME map and that The Author is free to bring all of you there.
The Author will now stop referring to herself in the third person to adopt a more consumer friendly first person in the next destination:
Minas Tirith (a part of Gondor)
Here we are, just outside the city of Gondor. If you look upwards, the tip of the entire pyramid shape thing is the palace, where the Royal family of Gondor lives. The only way to enter the city from the plains where we are standing is from the lowest level; and yes, we are going to the tip eventually. I hope you brought hiking boots or sports shoes.
Attraction 1: The City
No doubt you find this city very pretty, but as the building that borders the East, it is a wonder that the city has not yet been demolished by Evil. You may especially note that the city can be easily demolished by firing stones from the top so that they crush everything at the bottom as they roll down the mountain side- not that The Author is encouraging any attempts to do so, of course. According to experts, the building was much stronger in the past, but weathering has apparently weakened the stones, which was why a large part of it was so easily destroyed in the war, as recorded by a journalist on video. The cliff that protrudes out is part of the natural stone upon which the city is built, and the lack of railings once again shows the lack of regard for safety by the builders of the Second Age- indeed, it is a popular belief that the last Steward lost his life by falling off the cliff, burning. There have apparently been complains about the vulnerability of the city and its safety hazards, and the new King of Gondor has promised that something will be done about it soon, although nothing has been done about it for the past hundreds of years.
Attraction 2: Inside the City
We will be spending fifteen minutes at the base for those who would like to buy some local produce or local delicacies. You are also advised to buy water because the hike up there is going to take more than one hour, and the roads are rather bumpy. What did you ask? How did Lord Faramir survive being dragged by a horse when he was almost dead from the bottom of the city to the tip? A miracle, definitely. No wonder Lord Denethor was so sure he was dead.
Attraction 3: Houses of Healing
Almost. There. Allow me to stop on the sixth level to introduce you to the famous Houses of Healing, where Lord Faramir met and fell in love with Lady Eowyn. Nothing really worth noting here, except that it may be a bit dark and depressing for a place that is supposed to resemble a modern day hospital. However, that might have contributed to the romance between these two, though this is still questionable.
Attraction 4: Courtyard/ The White Tree of Gondor
This. This is the White Tree of Gondor, the miracle tree that is able to survive without having any chlorophyll to make food. This is also the national symbol of Gondor and is the only one left in the world. Take many pictures of this Tree, though with any luck, the Tree will be here for many years, for it is said that it lives as long as the line of Kings is strong. From here, you will be able to see the city of Ithilien, ruled by Lord Faramir. The fairest place in the city you can see from here is the small colony established by Prince Legolas. Both lords are frequently seen about in the city (indeed, they can be seen now; please do not hyperventilate), however, due to the recent incident involving a Mary Sue escaping into the city, a new rule has been set by the King of Gondor that bans foreign tour groups from entering. We regret that this rule also applies to us, and we can go no further.
Attraction 5: The Throne Room
Welcome to the Throne Room of Gondor. It is certainly majestic, but it is an utter pain to clean every corner of the room such as the tall arches and domes. The huge size of the room serves two purposes: for the King's subjects during their weekly meetings and as the meeting point for large travel groups like ours. The King gives his regrets that he is unable to meet you in person, but points you to the various statues in the room depicting the past rulers of Gondor. Should you like a portrait of him and his family on an A5 paper, please purchase them at any stall in Gondor. As none of us is the King, we are not allowed to sit on the Throne; however, you may take a picture with it. Fangirls of the King, please refrain from kissing the Throne. It is most unhygienic and creepy. Weapon lovers, however, will be instantly drawn to the sword hanging near the Throne on the wall. This is a model of the sword Anduril, the King's heirloom, as the sword is current still in the King's possession.
We have now come to the end of the short trip, and you may now proceed to the dining halls for lunch. However, please do not eat too much for lunch, as we will be descending the city later by either hot air balloons or gliders from said cliff in Attraction One, unless you would like to take a one hour walk down again. Adventure lovers are encouraged to buy gliders as this is the only place in Middle Earth where you can glide down to the Pelennor Fields without much fear of crashing into anything. Take note, though, that you are expected to return the glider at the first level of the city, for gliders are extremely hard to make with their current technology. I hope you have enjoyed your stay here, and do click on the review button to make a reservation for the next venue.
Middle Earth Virtual Tours: the only tour that is free, fast and 100% safe. Maybe.