Middle Earth Virtual Tours
Thank you for your reviews, Mirlasse, Aria Breuer and OneSizeFitsAll, icprncss2, deelzy and Lily Lindsey-Aubrey!
To Mirlasse: Thank you for your review! I hope you enjoyed your tea in the library!
To Aria Breuer: The Author is pleased you have said that, because Timon and Pumbaa have been her favorite characters since young.
To OneSizeFitsAll: The Author is not a Gondorian and does not speak Westron and is hence unable to convince the King that she is not a Mary Sue. She is thus not allowed inside. To the hair problem, The Author believes the main problem lies not in the hair length but in the shampoo they use, because she likes the silky hair of elves, and has suggested to the elves to at least give them tips on proper hair care. Denethor's chair is still there, but The Author would like to point out that it looks incredibly pointy to hug well. There is no base jumping because that has been banned, according to a certain rumour on fanfiction :)
To icprncss: Ah, a Silmarillion reader! You raised possible destinations that The Author will seriously consider, as The Author did contemplate visiting Gondolin once if not for the amount of trouble she has to go through to reach the place. The Author shall have to read more up before she starts organizing tours there, however, and she asks for your forgiveness for that.
To deelzy: Thank you for enjoying the story. Now that you put it this way, The Author is itching to bring people there. With safety gear of course.
To Lily Lindsey-Aubrey: I am glad you liked this story! Mordor will probably be soon. I know how many people enjoy reading about Mordor these days :)
For now, The Author shall drop the third person and introduce the next destination,
The Shire
Ahhhh, the relaxing green hills, extremely peaceful scenery and comfortable chatter, all found here in this quaint little countryside known as the Shire. Known for loving food and hating adventures, this countryside has surprisingly produced quite a number of heroes, some of who are unacknowledged. As we walk about later, we will be able to hear a song that curiously resembles that in a certain movie. I have been told that that song is the Anthem of the Shire, but they sold its copyrights to a producer in exchange for good food. I hope you brought a lot of good food for this journey, for they can be used as currency if necessary, as deduced from above.
Southfarthing
A long walk from the city, the Southfarthing is nevertheless home to the best pipeweed in the whole if Middle Earth, so good that even Wizards, angels in disguise, crave desperately for it. Reviews such as 'Out of this world' have been given by an addicted Gandalf and Saruman, though the latter insists he isn't (yeah, sure, and have barrows of it half a world away?). However, the fact that the Wizards remain alive after smoking it for so many years does not mean that pipeweed is healthier than tobacco- they are not afflicted with health hazards in the same way as us. Remember: Gandalf can come back to living world as his old self. We can't.
Frodo's house
A very familiar house, is it not? This is Bag End, Frodo's and Bilbo's house that is extremely well hidden, what with the green door that complements the wooden walls. It currently belongs to the actual but often overlooked hero of the story, Samwise Gamgee. We regret that we are unable to enter the hobbit hole as there are simply too many of us here, and the latest inhabitants do not wish to have their chandelier destroyed as the Big People (and Wizards) bump into them. And no, you are not allowed to throw rings into the fireplace and see if it will melt or come out cool. The Ring That Must Not Be Named is destroyed, and the family has enough rings already.
A particular tree that you can see from here in the nearby fields may seem different to you, and indeed it is. This is the Mallorn tree, the same one seen in Lothlorien. Contrary to popular beliefs, Lady Galadriel did not specially give a rope to Sam because obviously the Lothlorien elves will give ropes to the fellowship- there is no need for the Lady to give one to him as her special gift. However, this brings us to the question of why no one got extra ropes back in Rivendell before they set off, which no one has yet answered. Anyway, the Mallorn tree you see here sprouted from the Seed and Earth the Lady had bestowed to Sam as The Gift (though, considering the circumstances then, perhaps not the most practical thing) and is most precious to the hobbits here, though not as precious as good food.
Frodo, by the way, is not a young hobbit, nor did not leave his hobbit hole immediately. The 'Frodo' that left was merely an illusion created by Gandalf to differentiate between readers and non-re- I mean, to confuse the servants of Evil. Oh and did I say that Frodo is actually about 50 years old? The nineteen year old look was a glitch in Mithrandir's magic.
We will take a 15 minutes stop here to take photos. We regret, however, that there is no toilet stop here, because I assure you that getting to the toilet in the first place is a very difficult job for us Big People. The effort is not worth it.
Woody Hall
This is the exact spot where Frodo and his company of hobbits met the elves passing West to Valinor, and where Sam fan-hobbited upon seeing the Elves. The general surprised reaction of the elves to the hobbits indicate that hobbits are a rare species on Middle Earth and therefore is to be treasured- and four of them were sent on a near suicidal quest? No idea. Well at least they managed to return and save this pretty place from falling to Evil eventually, no small thanks to Gildor, the leader of the elves, who sent word about Frodo's plight to Tom Bombadil and Aragorn, thus indirectly saving the hobbits before they set off to Mordor. Who is Gildor? Please consult the Red Book you should already have. He is but one character the movie has missed out.
Brandywine river
This is the river that borders the Shire and which the hobbits had to cross to get out of the Shire. Contrary to popular beliefs, they were not chased by a Ringwraith whilst crossing the Bridge- if they were, I highly doubt that that river itself would stop a Ringwraith from the ring. The hobbits were actually ferried to the opposite bank by Farmer Maggot after they met with danger. The more exciting account is possibly a rumour to enliven the whole story of the hobbits' journey and to show how well hobbits can jump.
We will now stride quickly to the nearest inn, The Prancing Pony. To get there, we will be passing by numerous places. There may be another tour introducing these places separately because it does not do them justice to have only a short snappy introduction to them, which the hungry and tired Author will start giving if she is asked to describe any more places before she is served lunch. However, the Author cannot resist herself and shall specifically point out Tom Bombadil's house which everyone is passing by now because it houses a powerful character Tom Bombadil, who, although playing an important role in saving Frodo, has never been featured on films before, when even a non existing character like Tauriel did.
We are now at The Prancing Pony. Food that was served to the hobbits then, but in larger portions, will be served soon. Please note that children are not allowed to drink alcoholic drinks, so please do not claim that you are travelling with a hobbit to get alcohol for them. The chair which Strider (now the King of Gondor and technically also of the Shire should he wished to claim it) once sat is still where it once was, though you will have to pay the barman one silver piece to borrow a coat, sit on it and pose as him. I hope you enjoy your meal, and should you still wish to visit more places in Middle Earth, please leave a review to make a booking.
Middle Earth Virtual Tours: the only tour that is fast, free, and 100% safe. Maybe.