A/N: I'm back! I also can tell that this is going to be a rather long author's note. Be prepared! But please do read it, everything I write has a purpose—amazingly enough.

Has anyone else noticed the noticeable drop in reviews. I mean not that I am complaining, I mean I do have 76 terrific reviews. But, I just find it odd that I am writing and updating faster than I ever have and my chapters are much longer than usual and not too many people are reviewing! I mean wow, talk about backward.

But, this just makes me appreciate those of you that do review that much more. I love you guys! Thank you so incredibly much!

I would like to take this time and dedicate this chapter to two of my readers—Empress and LeopardDance! Both have become rather sick over my story and you have no idea how much that makes me feel loved. LeopardDance has threatened to send me a doctor's bill for all of the damage that I have caused. Mentally I believe. Empress was reading my story while she was sick and now I am assuming that it is not exactly helping. Maybe I should cut you off for a while to let you recover. The laughing can NOT be good for a sore throat. Thanks to both of you and everyone else!

Now, don't go getting down on me for the title of this chapter, I know I ripped it off of Harry Potter. Shamelessly I might add. Well, duh, it is supposed to be funny and I thought that this was a very fitting title to this chapter. History-wise and all. I have my reasons for everything that I say that is not very intelligent and I have my reasons for those few and far between moments when I do say something that can be considered intelligent. (Evil mastermind laugh here…)

Anyway, here's another one of my oh so perfect chapters. Let's see what trouble Emily can get into again, shall we? Muhaha, its called writer's prerogative my dears! I think those are now my two favorite words….

*~*~*

A rather large shadow fell across my sun, and I was not happy about it.

"Hey! Move ya ass! This is my piece of sun, get your own!"

After I had finally gotten most of the shine off of my body, (damn soap!) I went back to shore and flopped out on the beach. I decided this was definitely the best way to dry off, just lying in the sun and letting it do the work. Ahhh…

But then, being the people that they are someone decided to go stand in front of my sun and what? THEY WERE DRIPPING ON ME! The humanity!

I leapt to my feet and saw that it was Pippin that was taking my sun away.

"What is the meaning of this, pipsqueak? I was relaxing minding my own business and then you decide to drip on me!"

He looked nervous and then said in a nervous voice, "Gandalf told me to tell you that soon we will have to get out of the water and if you wanted to swim again that this was you last chance to do so." He gave me a tentative smile.

I looked at him, "Oh, well why didn't you say so? All right, I will be in shortly. I just want to go check something out." He nodded and turned to run back into the water, "Pippin!" I called.

He turned back and faced me, "Do me a favor, dunk the geezer for me!"

Pippin giggled evilly and went tearing into the water. Watch out old fart, Pippin is on the loose!

I glanced over at the waterfall and tried to figure how high it was. While I had been dozing, I had gotten a brief idea that I should go see what was on top of the waterfall. You know shits and giggles.

I finally figured that it was roughly about twenty-five feet of stone wall. Not that big of a deal. I walked over to it and looked, sure enough! On either side of the actually falls the stone was chipped up, so there were tons of handholds. This was going to be fun!

I bent down and rubbed sand onto my hands. I had actually never been rock climbing. The closest I had ever gotten was the climbing wall at the gym back home. But, I had climbed trees, so maybe that would help me?

Well, my hands were dry so the only place left to go was up! I reached above me and grabbed the nearest handhold and levered myself up and kept going. I was about half way up when the guys finally saw me.

"Emily! What in the Valor are you doing?"

I glanced back over my shoulder and almost threw up. It is true. You don't want to look down.

"Um, falling to my death if you don't shut the hell up!" I said this last part a little hysterically. But, they didn't say anything to me either.

I finally reached above me and felt grass. I looked up and saw that I was at the top. Go me! I carefully climbed up and stood up. I glanced back down at the guys and they all started to clap. I did a few mock bows and did the 'your too kind's. I then turned around and looked to see what I had come up here for. I think I literally need to pick up my jaw.

It was the same stream and obviously the same waterfall that my backpack went over! I had walked in a complete circle! But, then I got another idea. Maybe all of my stuff was in my backpack at the bottom of the lake—where I could get to it!

I scrambled back to the edge and started to climb down a lot faster then when I was going up. I finally got to the bottom and the instant my feet hit the beach I was running for the water. I got to the water's edge and ran in and dove. Just as I was about to hit the water I saw that all of the guys were staring open mouthed at me. Great, now they think I am crazy!

I pushed that out of my mind and dove still further down into the water. I swam around for a moment but I still didn't see anything. I was running out of air fast so I pushed off from the bottom and shot to the surface. I took a whooping breath and dove once again. This time I tried slightly off to my left and went down, still nothing.

I surfaced again and tried to the right. The first thing I saw was a very large mass of weeds. They were everywhere. I was seriously going to be pissed if my backpack was in there! Those weeds really creep me out. Ugh!

I didn't see anything again so I went to the surface. I stayed up there for more than a split second this time. The lack of oxygen was making me feel severely lightheaded. I was just about to go back when someone grabbed my arm.

"What are you doing?" asked a very puzzled Boromir.

"Give me a minute and I can hopefully show you." With that I dove again. This time I was rewarded. There it was in all its soggy glory!

Damn!

There was my backpack, just as I figured. One itty-bitty problem though. It was seriously tangled in the weeds. You just can't win!

I swam over to it while I was trying to ignore the weeds' slimy touch. Yuck! I finally got over to it and I was once again out of air so up to the surface I went. My head broke the surface and down again. Is anyone else sensing a pattern?

I pulled and pulled I even tried shoving the damn thing over to the sides. Nothing, that thing was stuck tight. All because of those goddamn weeds! I feel an idea coming on here…

I went back up and looked at Aragorn, "Do you have a knife I can use?"

He nodded and swam back to the shore. When he came back he handed me a little knife.

"Thanks, I'll be right up."

I went back down and started to saw at the nasty weeds. One after another they fell to my sword! After I had finally vanquished my 'foes' I grabbed the so-called treasure and lugged it up with me.

"Booyah! What do you say to that?" I shoved the bag in all of their faces and all I got for my trouble was curious stares.

"Well?" asked Aragorn.

"What! You mean to tell me that after tying me to a tree and hanging me upside down that you do not recognize my backpack?!" I screamed.

"So that is where it went, I was curious to its fate when you found us the other night."

"Damn you!" I swam to the shore and hauled the back up after me. When it was water logged that thing was heavy!

I plopped down and started to fight with the zippers. They were so tangled up with weeds that I had to claw my way into the stupid bag. After I finally opened it I got to get up to my armpits with stale water. What fun…

(A/N: There are extra things in the bag from what I said earlier in the story. Sorry!)

The first thing I pulled out was the first-aid kit. I opened it up and drained out all of the water. The only thing that I would possibly be able to salvage was the case it's self and the gauze, if I could dry it out. I wrinkled my nose and kept digging.

I pulled out a bunch of very soggy energy bars. I just tossed those aside. Next was my canteen. That I could use! I set that off to my left where I had started a pile of everything that I could use.

Here came the compass, I looked it over and sat deciding for a moment. The glass was cracked in places and it did have a lot of water in it, but after you drained out the water it might be usable. I put it off to my left.

Next came my hairbrush! Thank God! That was definitely still usable! Someone was looking out for me!

I then dug out my car keys, yeah I suppose I will have to keep those. I put them to my left and saw that Merry promptly picked them up again. As I had been digging through my stuff, all of the guys had come out of the water and were now watching me intently. I just ignored them and continued on my quest.

I came across the matches finally and man were they soggy! I shook open the box and every single one of them were beyond use. Well, I guess I would worry if some of them were dry. I mean the entire bag was under water for about a week and a half!

I reached in again and pulled out this slimy, shapeless blob. Hence, the park map! I didn't even need to think about not being able to not use it. That was just disgusting!

The last thing in the bag at the very bottom was an old sweatshirt I threw in there just incase I got cold. I opened it up and wrung out all the water that I could. It was a soggy muddy mess.

"Oh, yeah that's hot." I said to no one in particular with a grimace. But, never the less, I did put it off to my left. I may get cold. You don't want to throw away good clothing for nothing.

I looked up at the group that was surrounding me, "Well, tha-tt-tt-t's all folks!" I did my best impression of Porky Pig, hoping for a laugh. They all just stared at me like I was crazy.

I tried again, "That's all I have in my bag and the only things I can use again are the sweatshirt, the compass, and part of the first-aid kit."

"You forgot about these!" Merry held out the car keys to me.

"Ha! I highly doubt I am going to need those anytime soon."

"What are they?"

"My car keys." They all just looked at me. "They start my car at home, it's a transportation device that we use."

They all just nodded, they still didn't have a clue but they weren't going to admit it.

"What's this?" asked Frodo as he pointed to my key ring.

It was a purple heart with a picture of my parents and my standing together under a tree in our back yard when I was fifteen.

"It's just to make sure that I don't lose my keys."

"No, I mean who are these people?"

"Me, my mom and my dad when I was younger."

"Oh, where are they now?"

"Dead." I said shortly.

"I'm sorry I didn't know." He said sympathetically.

"Yeah, I know. Don't worry about it."

"How did they pass?" asked Merry.

"Car accident. Another good thing about cars, you can use them to kill others. It was a couple of years ago. I didn't still live with them, but you know, it still hit hard."

"How was their death caused by a 'car accident'?" Boromir wanted to know.

"Some asshole that was so drunk that he didn't even know his own name ran a stop sign and broadsided them. My dad was killed instantly, the guy hit them on the driver's side, and my mom died two days after him. She was in a coma so she didn't even know that I was with her." I stopped and blinked back tears.

I took a deep breath, "Well, that's enough of that. Let's get going, I'm hungry and it is getting dark."

In fact it had gotten very dark while we were going through my bag and now everyone's stomachs were practically roaring. We all started to head back to our camp.

"Do you think that Gimli started a meal for us?"

"I certainly hope not, he can't cook at all," Legolas informed me. "We made him cook once and almost were poisoned for his troubles. You are better off with some of Sam's cooking later then some of Gimli's now."

"Ugh, sounds like my roomy from college. She couldn't even boil water with out that burning."

Sam looked at me, "I thought that was impossible, to burn water I mean."

"Well, she sure succeeded with it. It is going to feel so good to be in front of the fire!"

It had slowly been getting cooler and now almost everyone was shivering, they were all still damp. That is, except for Legolas.

I looked at him, "Damn elf!"

He just laughed. Aragorn came up beside me, "When we get back to the fire we had best look at your injuries. I am still concerned about them."

"Sure."

"I was also going to ask you, why did you not use your sword that we gave you against the beast instead of running?"

I looked at him, "Well, for starters, I barely know what end is sharp and what is not on a sword, let alone how to use it. And, I was panicking. When you are panicking you don't just think 'hey, I think I will grab my sword that I don't know how to use and slay the thing that is chasing me.' I mean it is just not practical."

Aragorn looked at me very surprised, "So you mean to tell me that we sent you off with a sword and you did not even know how to use it?"

"Yep, that about sums it all up."

"We must teach you how to wield one, for your own safety."

"Emily, Warrior Princess, here I come!"

*~*~*

A/N: Well tell me, how was it? Am I loosing my touch?

I hope that was sufficient to all of you that wanted to know about Emily's past. I wasn't going for the whole guilt thing. But, I just wanted to let all of you know that for other than the people that she works with, she is alone in the world.

In other words, no one is going to be looking for her that much. In other words, more time for my story to take place in.

I love the way I think!

Abskii

PS:

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