This one is for the Lulz.
Edward vs. Chuck Norris!
One day, a fan announced that Edward Cullen could beat Chuck Norris in a fight. Chuck took the poor, deluded, girl to his house and showed her all of the Cullens stuffed heads. Oh, and Jacob was a rug.
Moral of Story: Chuck Norris makes furniture out of emo kids who think he could beat Chuck in a fight.