I know I promised this sooner – forgive me! A/N after the chapter. Oh, and please note – this story is rated MATURE for a reason. Keep that in mind whilst reading.

Chapter Ten: Parabol

We barely remember what came before this precious moment,
Choosing to be here right now. Hold on, stay inside...
This body holding me, reminding me that I am not alone in
This body makes me feel eternal. All this pain is an illusion.(mjk)

EPOV:

It was the tattoo that did me in. Well, not really the tattoo itself, as I'm usually not really partial to girls going out and getting themselves inked. It was the actual lifting of her shirt and lowering of her jeans that unraveled me. It was the exposing of her hip bone that sent a rush of blood first to my head, leaving me a bit stunned, and then lower until it reached my crotch.

And I thought: I am done for. This girl will be the end of me, and that is it.

There was no turning back after that; after learning about her losing her parents; after discovering that she was in fact, not chaste or innocent in the slightest. She had been through shit, maybe as much as I had. She had come through it, in one way or another. And now she was drunk, as was I, and leaning with her elbows propped up on her knees and her chin resting lazily on her palm. I liked this side of Bella, and I liked it because it unveiled another a side of me, a side that I very carefully and secretly tuck away so as not to accidentally expose it to anyone. This side of Bella was fun and flirty, and it made me feel fun and flirtatious as well. Suddenly, everything was not all morbid and cynical as it usually had to be. It was simple, and even obvious: I was sitting next to a girl I liked, I was flirting with her, and I was getting drunk. Life really couldn't get much better.

Except I had to get all honest on her. Who knows if she could read between the lines, but suddenly in that stupid little game we were playing, the topic of "love" came up, and I was unable to say that I hadn't been in love before. How the fuck does a person know if they're in love anyway? I sure as hell didn't feel like I was, and I wasn't going to fuck around and try to pretend that the love that I was claiming to have felt had been directed from Rosalie. But fucking tequila – it always makes me all lopsided, and maybe even a smidge introspective, and in that moment saying that I had never been in love before would have been like saying I'd never smoked a cigarette. A downright lie, regardless of how much bullshit I would really have to make an effort to muddle through before I got there.

I wasn't in love with Bella Swan. But the thing was, I also wasn't NOT in love with her. What a mess of an otherwise manageable situation. Maybe it was Mr. Patron talking, but admitting that I had been in love before was the easy part. Not so easy would be thinking about the implications of it after the buzz wore off.

But that would all have to come later. At that moment, Bella Swan's hipbone was still very much on my mind, as were the loose chestnut curls that fell between her fingers as she leaned comfortably against her hand. Her eyes were glassy and a bit red from all the drinking, yet they were still warm, still so goddamn inviting. My senses felt extremely heightened, and her scent was fucking intoxicating. It was calling to me, inviting me in; a fucking swan song. I would have laughed if I wasn't so goddamn turned on.

We had both just silently admitted that we'd never made love with anyone before, and I wanted to smack myself and pour the tequila out for letting myself be so fucking open. Why were we talking about this? Why had I brought it up? I had never even thought about the act of "making love" before, not until now. Fucking had worked just fine for me. But making myself push Rose away and abandon that situation probably unearthed a whole other multitude of unconscious thoughts that were pertinent to my sex life. I stopped fucking Rose because I was sick of fucking. It was really as simple as that.

I wanted to know what it would be like to sleep with someone I really liked. To be intimate with a girl I was growing to care about, a girl that I was finding quite beautiful, a girl that there was a possibility of being in love with.

But I didn't really have time to really make any sort of decision, because Bella was leaning in, her elbows now off of her knees and her palms on the carpet, and her lips were suddenly pressing against mine.

The reaction was innate and primal. All the thoughts about possibly loving Bella went right out the window. I wanted to feel her, really fucking feel her, and not any of the "feel her heart" or "feel her mind" bullshit. I was hungry for her in a way that I'd never felt before, a way that not even Rose had managed to drag out of me. The contemplation of this fact was quite simple and straightforward: as much as I wanted to get to know Bella Swan, I also wanted to have sex with her. And do a few more little things along the way.

Her lips were soft and supple against mine as they met with the lightest pressure. Though drunk, I could tell she was hesitant, and I immediately wanted to embrace her and soothe all and any of her insecurities away and compliment her on being brave enough to have made the first move. I sucked her bottom lip softly, and then harder, which made an elicit moan escape feverishly from her lips.

So really, I guess you could say the tattoo really wasn't the end of me after all. It was that moan, that tender yet zealous moan, that made me lose control of all my senses and sent my desire spinning radically over the edge.

BPOV:

Everything went very quickly after that.

Though I went with my instincts and leaned in to kiss Edward, as soon as my lips touched his, I felt slight hesitation coarse through me. All the "what ifs" started spinning through me, and my drunken haze seemed to glaze over when I considered the consequences of kissing a person who may not want to kiss me back.

But Edward reacted just the way I'd hoped; better even, as he parted his mouth open, overwhelming my senses with his honey-sweet breath, and took my bottom lip into his teeth. His lips and tongue were soft and wet and velvet everywhere, and feeling all that contrasted with the surprisingly sharp pressure of his straight white teeth sent me over the edge. Unwillingly, I moaned.

With that Edward's soft supple kisses suddenly turned into quick and desperate ones, as his mouth and tongue and teeth were seemingly everywhere: my lips, my throat, my chin, my ears. His passion initiated my passion, and I returned the kisses in the same exact manner.

His head bent to suck the curve of my neck, which caused another moan to escape from my lips. This made Edward growl with excitement, and his teeth scraped the hollow base where my neck and shoulder meet, and I bent my head back to give him better access. Edward seized this as an opportunity to journey his mouth upwards against the length of my neck, and so I stretched further. The sensations were unlike any I'd ever experienced, and a wave of drunkenness hit me hard and fast, though I couldn't tell if I was drunk off the alcohol or simply off of Edward himself.

I was still sitting cross-legged at this point, with Edward leaning into me, his knees on the floor and his arms extended to support himself as he licked me up with fervor. He made his way up to the curve of my chin, and he extended his tongue, trailing the tip lighting across my jaw-line. He made his way to my ear again and took it into his mouth, his tongue flicking my ear-lobe with both tenderness and passion. He released it and moved his tongue up to the tip of my ear and lingered there for a second. I half expected him to whisper something to me, but his hesitation broke, and his mouth was back against mine, our tongues clashing and reeling and reveling in the explicit wonders of heated embrace and exchanged saliva.

I wanted more of Edward, and I peeked my eyes open and lowered them to his crotch. His pants were much more than just blissfully snug now: they were fucking ready to pop. My mouth twitched upwards with excitement and I put my hands against his chest and pushed him down, making him lie fully extended against the lovely Persian rug. His eyebrows raised with surprise, but he bit his lip in anticipation. His eyes were hooded but still permeating luscious green waves, and I wanted to melt within them, as corny and as ridiculous as that sounds.

I straddled Edward, folding my knees down on either side of him, placing my crotch in perfect residence right upon his. I wondered if he could feel the wetness and heat that was exuding from me down there, but then I thought that that was stupid, as we were both wearing jeans.

Regardless of our attire, though, I wanted to feel him, and I wanted him to feel me, so I moved myself slowly back and forth over his bulge. I watched as Edward's eyes rolled back and his mouth opened, and this time it was he who moaned.

I placed my hands on his chest and rubbed them lightly over his muscled counters, my fingers lingering in momentary admiration of his physique. I grinded my hips further, moving back and forth with no trepidation, and Edward reached his arms over and put his hands under my shirt, pressing against the small of my back.

I leaned down and kissed him, my hair spilling over and getting in the way. He put one hand on my head and tangled his fingers in my hair, rubbing one thumb underneath my ear affectionately in the process.

The kisses were deep and lusty now, no longer sweet and hesitant or quick with adrenaline. Our mouths worked in effortless unison, so unlike the kisses I'd shared with men before. There was no question of where to turn a head or when to caress a tongue; we were so physically in tune that I had to ask myself if it was just my drunken mind and sexual frustration playing tricks on me.

"I want to feel you," Edward groaned, his hands against my back again, pressing with slight aggression. "I want to feel all of you."

I wasn't sure if this meant that we were moving forward in the sexual stages of a hookup or not, but I didn't give a fuck. I wanted to feel him—all of him—too.

"Okay," I whispered into his mouth. I pulled myself back into a sitting position, my crotch and his still perfectly aligned. Our eyes caught, and if I'd had just one more shot I would have had the gall to wink at him. I pulled my shirt over my head, tossing it carelessly to the side. His eyes left mine as I watched him scan my near-naked body. His eyes became even more glazed over with lust, though I hadn't thought it possible.

He raised his hands upwards, as if begging for mercy. "May I ?" he asked, and I almost laughed at his overt politeness. As if I wasn't fucking begging for it already. I didn't want to answer him; I felt my voice would crack and bubble with obvious sexual desire, so I took his hands and firmly pressed them on my breasts. His eyes widened but his palms spread, and I left my hands on top of his.

My nipples hardened at the touch of his warm hands, and Edward's dick shifted underneath me. Our bodies were reacting in place of our minds, but I didn't care. Drunk or not, Edward's hands on my breasts and his dick under me was the best goddamn thing I had ever felt in my life.

His hands contracted and cupped the swell of my breasts, and my hands left his as I threw my head back again, moaning without caring this time. My moans really seemed to excite him, because he thrust his hips upwards, and as we were positioned his bulge rubbed just right against my clit. Of course, this really excited me, and I rubbed back up against him.

I leaned forward against his hands, willing him cup my breasts with all his strength. His fingers moved in circles around my nipples, and I could feel the tips of them pressing anxiously against my bra. My breasts wanted out of my bra and I wanted my bra off of my breasts. I knew Mr. Proper wouldn't take it off himself, at least not without a little encouragement.

I nuzzled my head against his neck and pressed my mouth against his ear. "Take it off," I whispered, the tequila highly improving my seduction techniques. He groaned again, his hips jerking and his dick pressing even harder against my clit.

"Fuck, Bella," he sighed, his words sending shivers down my spine. My heat below flared again.

His hands reached behind me and he unclasped my bra with the ease of a guy who certainly knows what he's doing. His hands moved slowly toward my shoulders, his fingers intertwining in the straps as he pulled my bra down, the trail of his fingers leaving sparks against my skin. He looked deeply into my eyes before he casts the bra aside. I felt like he was trying to tell me something, but I can't imagine what it is. But there was a pained look in his eyes, not quite sad, but not quite purely sexual either. I wondered what expression he was reading from my eyes, and I hoped the fact that I am so enamored with this situation and with the presence and smell of him was not too obvious.

No matter though, really; we were here, we were in this moment, and I wanted Edward Cullen more than I've wanted anything in my life.

Once the bra is gone his hands moved up my sides, lightly pressing against my ribs, until his fingers meet the bottom curve of my breasts. He tucked his thumb under the weight of my breast and my ribs, and my breathing comes out rapid and uneven, the heat of everything almost becoming far too much for me to bear.

His eyes finally leave mine as his eyes move downward to take in the sight of my naked chest. Soon enough his breathing came out to match mine exactly. He spread his hands over my breasts, my nipples hard between his fingers.

His eyes flickered up to mine momentarily, and I could barely make out their green from underneath his deep set and heavily hooded lids. Then his mouth was on my breast, and the sound that left my mouth was unlike any that I'd ever made before. His tongue flicked against my nipples tenderly, and then his mouth and teeth were sucking, sucking. He moaned between mouthfuls of my breasts, sending goose bumps all over my flesh.

He came up and his tongue was against mine again; the kisses heated and intense as though any second either of us might very well erupt. I knew I was just a second from exploding. But I wanted Edward closer, closer still; I hadn't nearly felt enough of him yet, and here he was, all muscles and arms and flesh and mouth and I felt as if I would die if I didn't have all of him that very second.

I lifted his shirt above his head, briefly wondering when his jacket had come off in the middle of it all. I almost gasped at the wonder that was Edward's naked chest; he was thin and yet heavenly toned, the curves of his chest and the slight trail of hair that led down into the waistband of his jeans almost sending me completely over the edge.

I wanted to lick ever inch of him, but Edward had other ideas, as he wrapped his arms tightly around me and pressed my breasts against his chest. He sucked my shoulder and I moaned in pleasure, as his hands moved upwards and downwards on my back.

"I want you so fucking bad," he moaned in my ear, and I swear I purred in satisfaction.

"I'm right here," I whispered back, my hands pulling his soft bronze hair while his mouth went back to intensely working on my neck.

"What do you want to do, Bella?" he asked softly. Didn't he already know? I thought I had a pretty good idea of what HE wanted to do, as my very swollen clit was still pressed up against his dick.

"I want you," I said.

"But is this too fast, too soon? I need to know … I've never done this before."

And those words almost stopped me cold. I pushed his chest away and looked him directly in the eye, a second away from kicking him in the balls instead of what I had been planning to do to them just moments ago.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I've fucking heard you and Rosalie, Edward! And the game … you just told me …"

"Stop," he said, pressing a finger against my lips. "I meant I've never done this before, with someone I have feelings for."

A wave of shock slammed over me as I realized the magnitude of what Edward was telling me. Not only was he saying that all or any of the girls he'd slept with before hadn't meant a thing to him, but he was also admitting that he had a thing for me. Which, sad as it may seemed, was still surprising even considering the situation we were now in.

Most surprisingly of it all, I hadn't expected Edward to actually admit anything like that to me. After all, he always played the cold and distant card. Maybe Drunkward was someone I'd like to talk to more often …

But all I could say was: "Oh." But I smiled against his finger, and his hand moved to my chin, and he cupped it lightly while bringing my face to meet his. This kiss was tender and soft, almost like the first, but more honest, as if he were trying to convince me of his confession with lips and tongue.

Well, it worked.

"So, is this too fast, Bella? I need to know …"

"No," I sighed into his mouth. I grinded against his dick as if to prove my point.

He moaned again, laying back against the rug and writhing upwards to match my movements. Though I knew Edward already wanted me, I wanted him to really want me … I wanted to make him cry out my name and beg for more. The tequila made my blood soar, and I felt giddy with sexual power, the excitement of dominating over him too thrilling to bear.

"Tell me what you want," I whispered into his ear, licking my lips in satisfaction as his eyes rolled back with those words.

"I want you," he said helplessly.

"No, baby. Not good enough. Tell me what you want."

"I want to see if your pussy tastes as good as you smell," he said. His eyes widened at his own honesty, and I supposed the words just leaked right out of him. Edward winced as if embarrassed, but I only smiled at him.

"We'll get there," I said, reaching my fingers into the waistband of his jeans. I found his tip and stroked it lightly with my fingernail. I felt that some wetness from his dick had already leaked out. I unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them down, leaving him only in his heather grey boxers that clearly outlined the massive length of Edward Cullen. I sighed in satisfaction. This was in no way going to be disappointing.

I cupped my hand against his cotton covered bulge, squeezing his balls gently and rolling them between my forefingers. I couldn't tell one moan from the next with him, as he was letting them all fly out.

When I caught his eye I lowered my head down and pressed my face against his bulge, breathing hotly into it. He threw his head back with exponential force. I nuzzled my mouth in his boxers, taking one of his balls in between my teeth and rolling it lightly back and forth.

"Oh, fuck, baby," he moaned. I knew I was probably being evil at this point, so I finally pulled his boxers off, revealing Edward in all his glory. And oh, was it ever glorious.

I took his thick width and held it tightly in my hand, relishing in the touch of his velvety skin.

"Now, what do you want?" I asked, knowing very well the answer would be much different this time.

"I want my dick in your mouth," he trembled. His eyes averted to mine, worried again that he had gone too far. But I was probably more far gone than he; I was so heated and in the moment.

So, I put his dick in my mouth. He was much wider and longer than anyone I'd been with before, and because I hadn't performed such an act in a very long time, it took me a moment to get the rhythm down just right. But quickly enough, I got it, and I sucked and dove while fingering his balls at the same time.

Because there had been so much build up leading up to this, I expected that Edward wouldn't last very long, so when his dick began trembling in my mouth, I knew it would be only a moment or two. He groaned and tried to lift my head up, but I shook it slightly, letting him know that I was well aware of what to expect.

"Fuck, Bella … I'm gonna cum." And with one final shudder, Edward exploded into my mouth, and the taste was oddly reminiscent of honey, which almost made me laugh between swallows.

When I was finished, I sat up slowly, looking at Edward completely naked. His head lulled off into his shoulder, and he looked utterly exhausted. He opened his eyes and smiled crookedly at me, and my heart swelled suddenly, and I knew that I wanted him in so many other ways than just this. And maybe … maybe he wanted me too.

EPOV:

"You are a fucking goddess," I groaned, not caring how fucking far gone I was at this point and not caring how despicably honest I had been this entire evening. Bella had just given me the best goddamn blowjob of my life, something so outrageously fantastic even my wildest wet dreams couldn't have schemed something that hot. She was crazy sexy, especially now, with her hair all wild and her lips still pink from sucking me off. She was coy, but I wasn't about to let her off that easy. No way in hell.

"I still want what I said before." I propped myself up and spun her around, so now it was her lying on her back on top of the rug and me straddling her. She looked so fucking beautiful lying there, the swell of her tits fucking beckoning me to take them in my mouth. Patience, I told myself. There are bigger fish to fry.

She smiled lazily at me, her warm brown eyes all hooded and sex ridden as she looked at me. The tattoo, the moan, the eyes … they all would be the end of me. And I didn't fucking care, it could all end right now, and I would be happy. I would savor this, savor all of this. If I never fucked another girl in my life I wouldn't care. This could be enough.

I expertly unbuttoned her jeans and slid them down, revealing satin black boy cut panties underneath. And just like that, I was hard as a fucking rock again. Figures.

I placed my hand against her pussy, and it just radiated fucking heat and warmth and wetness. With my thumb against her clit, I rubbed gently, moving in paced circular motions, and I watched as her eyes lulled back and her head rolled around on the carpet. Good. It was her turn to moan.

Using both hands I slid her panties down and threw them to the side. I reveled in the fucking beauty that was Bella's naked pussy for a moment. There was not one centimeter of her that wasn't fucking gorgeous. I took my hand and pressed it lightly against the soft folds of her pussy. She was more wet than any girl I'd ever been with.

I rubbed my palm back and forth against her folds and wetness and rubbed some of the wetness against her bare thigh, wanting to make everything as wet and delicious as I knew her pussy would be. I lowered my head, and who would have thought – her pussy was fucking peonies and sage too. I would have laughed if it wasn't so predictable.

I lowered my mouth and licked my tongue lightly against her clit, making her squirm and sigh with both excitement and pleasure. It was swollen and pink and delicious. I kissed her folds and sucked her thighs, which made her twitch and moan even more.

But I knew what she wanted, and I was going to give it to her. I stroked my finger against her clit a little more, and then inserted them into the heavenly center that was Bella's pussy.

"Oh, FUCK, Edward," she cried, biting her lip and writhing around. She was so soft and wet and beautiful inside, and I thought of feeling her insides around my dick, and at that thought my dick was fucking throbbing and twitching around, too.

I pounded my fingers into Bella while rubbing her clit simultaneously. I couldn't help it, I had to cup my dick in my hands, it was getting pretty ridiculous, so I stroked myself while I thrust my fingers into Bella, her juices and scent and sounds illuminating all of my senses.

"Oh, baby, I'm gonna cum," she cried. Those were probably the most amazing words I'd ever heard, and as she came I came right along with her; her pussy contracting around my right hand as my cum spilled over my left. Our juices were both everywhere. I found my shirt and wiped my left hand up, while taking my right hand and putting it into my mouth.

Fucking divine.

Oh my GAH.

I totally just lost my virginity to you guys (or, at least made it to third) because this is my first explicit sex scene EVER. I've done some variations for short story classes, but nothing this overtly sexual. What do you think? Too much? Am I a detail hoarder? I'm very nervous about this, so feedback would ease the pain. 

Anyway, I left it at this point for a reason, though I know you guys want to know how they parted. I think it's better this way. Don't hate me …