I open my eyes to find him staring at me in the same way that he did that night. He still held this power over me that told me that even though we aren't married it's okay. So I do the unthinkable and kiss him.
My hands automatically go to his hair to hold him where he is. Though it isn't necessary because he is kissing me right back. His body is stiff and rigid. But he kisses me with such a passion it made me dizzy. My body relaxes when I feel his relax and he lets some of his weight on me. I enjoy the feeling of his warm body on top of me. He pulls back much to my dismay but he looks at me with an emotion that I had almost forgotten existed. Love. There he was. There was my Ben, the man that I loved and adored with all of my heart, the man who was always there to hold my hand or let me cry in his arms. For this brief moment in time I feel as if I was in his barbershop sitting in his chair talking to him with the sun shining through his window. The small kisses that we would share in the backyard in the rain when everyone was running inside to take cover.
I couldn't help but smile and pull him all the way on me in a hug that didn't last long because he stood up and stared down at me with that you're the craziest woman I know look. With his overpowering sent and warmth gone I smelled something very wrong something that didn't belong, the sent of blood and the sent of death! I gasped my hands making their way to my lips to cover them but I stop and look at them and see that they are covered in the red liquid. I suddenly become very aware of what was happening. I was lying in the middle of my bedroom kissing the man who killed all the men I knew. They were still here surrounding me covering me in their blood that had covered the entire floor and was now probably in the hall.
I take another look at Ben, no Sweeney and take in what he looks like. His shins are covered in blood as well as his hands and beautiful razor. The razor seemed to be smirking at me as a few drops roll of it. I feel the hair that is on the back of my head sticking to my neck and my dress sticking to my back and legs. It felt like I was lying in a blood bath. I look at Sweeney and I see a smug look on his face. Ben is gone again and I don't know where he is. I wish I had him with me so I could cry in his arms like I used to. I wished that he would sit there and hold me kiss the top of my head and sides of my neck to calm me down but that was all in the past.
I sit up and take in my surroundings I barley notice that I bring my legs up to my chest and hug them there. I rest my head on my knees and start to sob. Now that I finally have complete control of my body I don't want it. I don't want this creature in front of me to see me cry. I hated the man he was but I knew that somewhere in him Ben still lived. The thought killed me inside knowing the beautiful man that I once loved was being held captive in his own body by a mad man. I have to save him, and somehow I will.
I fell his eyes on me. I looked up at him through reddened eyes. He has a blank face but I could tell there was something going through his mind.
"What do you want with me?" I ask quietly. There is no response. "What in Hell's name do you want with me?" I yell getting impatient. Silence still surrounds us causing my eyes to start tearing up again.
He kneels down in front of me face as hard as ever. But his eyes, his eyes are like liquid onyx filled with warmth and adventure. He whispers a single word as he reaches for my hand.
"You"
I feel adrenaline shoot through me from the hand he touches with a gentleness that I didn't think a murderer could contain to the rest of my body. The shock of how he said the word made me shiver. I let it sink in for a minuet not even looking at him but more through him. When it sinks in I manage to form a single sentence.
"Who wants me?"
"Both of us." He whispers again almost to quietly for me to hear passed the never-ending pounding in my head. The shock was too much for me to handle. First every man I ever knew from my French home was dead. Then I find out that my friend from many years ago is still alive after being taken away by the law in England. Then I discover that his body has two completely different men inside. And to top it all off they both want me. Not my sister or any other woman me, ME! The smell of blood came wafting into my nose as I tried to calm down.
The next thing I know is its black. I still hear everything, can still feel the world around my body. I can feel myself breathing. I feel those arms that I've dreamed so much about wrap themselves around me. They lift me up bridal style I feel him tilt my head toward his chest. I feel him start moving the simple wave back and forth was calming at a time like this. His smell is all I smell as he carries me away, where I have no idea but I don't care. I feel cold and I know that I'm outside. I start to panic but my body refuses to wake. I hear him open a door and I hear a gasp. It sounds like a woman. He shifts a little most likely from lack of being social for so many years. I hear him ask if the woman had a washroom that he could wash me in.
She started yelling in French. He didn't understand but he let her yell. When she calmed down she said that she would take care of my needs if he washed himself and his clothes. He agreed to this after what felt like forever. We were moving again upstairs it feels like. He stops outside the door and I hear running water. He starts to walk in and sets me in a tub of warm water still clothed. I hear the woman shoo him out. The last thing I hear is her slamming the door and storming over to me. That's when my mind slipped into the blackness.