To start with I just wanted to say that I've only just realized that if I don't put anything on a line then fanfiction deletes it. This whole time I thought that I was leaving big gaps between parts of the story and therefore it all made completely sense when I shifted from one. Anyway, I'm fixing it on this chapter, and if I get the inclination I'll try to do it on the others.
So here it is. Eriol is pretty much based on a Philosophy lecturer I once had who was completely and utterly obsessed with everything Hitchhikers - I think this explains some things. Any quotes are probably from Douglas Adam's himself or at the very least, one of the Hitchhikers books (I think there was just the one quote anyway and that is from the Primary Stage/Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy/the movie (it's really a universal quote)). Also, I wanted to thank everybody for their reviews and everybody who added this story to their favourites. Finally, I just wanted to ask for some help in maybe writing the THINGEE for some of the minor characters - I'm not really familiar enough with a lot of the minor characters to write them convincingly so any help would be much appreciated. With that said, I guess I'll begin.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own CCS. I don't own Hitchhikers. I don't own THINGEE's. I don't own anything else in this that may possibly be owned by anybody . . . except maybe Venn diagrams but I'll have to get back to you on that.
Not What You Think - Madly 'Musing
Syaoran rushed to the computer screen as he had many times before in the past two weeks as the words 'You've got mail' echoed through his house.
Every time he heard those very same words he would drop everything – including a heavy antique paper weight with a wolf sitting under a cherry tree on his foot – just to race to his computer. He didn't care that he had to jump over his couch half the time to do so, or that he had walked – actually more like ran – into the kitchen counter seven times in the last day alone, or that getting to the computer in ten seconds rather than thirty was not going to make it any more likely to be her.
He wanted so badly for it to be her that he was struck with a heart wrenching disappointment when it wasn't her.
Syaoran just couldn't believe how naïve he was being about this whole thing. I mean, why would she reply to an e-mail from some random guy who was replying to an e-mail he was never meant to get in the first place? He knew if he was in her place he wouldn't, but then again, he already had.
Syaoran panted slightly after his sudden burst of energy which meant running from the bathroom to the study. Half his face was still covered in shaving cream, no prizes for guessing what he had been doing at the time or what he was wearing. Nothing but a porcelain white towel for all those who wanted to know.
Anyway, after his fastest yet sprint from the bathroom to the study clocking in at 11.25 seconds Syaoran was disappointed to find that yet again it wasn't from her.
He sighed sadly as he began his lonely walk back to his original task ignoring the computer as it repeated the same phrase in its soulless voice. After about 55 e-mails from someone else he wasn't going to check this time, he was already too discouraged to check twice in the span of a minute.
Syaoran carefully finished shaving and once dressed he finally went back to check up on the email that came in a few minutes earlier only to find that it was the one he was waiting for all along.
Sakura had replied and he couldn't think of anything that could have him more happy as he read through her essay length e-mail. That was of course until he came to the end of the e-mail and he couldn't help but smile.
'Love Sakura,' Syaoran thought to himself. 'How can two simple words have such an effect on me? How can she, some mystery girl I have never met, have such an effect on me?'
Syaoran sighed happily as he began typing his reply email unable to think about anything but the goddess that would receive it in the near future.
TELL US ABOUT YOU
What time is it? The time, my friends, is not applicable. It is merely an idea that you have been conditioned to accept as monotonous, restricted reality. "All time is an illusion; lunch time doubly so . . ."
*Name*: Eriol Hiiragizawa of the Hiiragizawa's from that place with the tree . . . you know.
*Nicknames*: Eli, I'm not sure where it came from but it is apparently very popular
*Parent's Names*: Yue and Ruby (A/N: I was desperate)
*Siblings*: Bouyah! Only child ness rocks! You get spoiled by your parents and spend you entire childhood getting everything you want from everyone around you. And that's why I plan to have a biggish family. No child of mine is going to be subjected to that kind of lifestyle.
*Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake*: I've made the conscious decision not to have a birthday cake (in spite of my fondness for all kinds of cake) for the next few years so as to avoid candles and so as to safe guard myself against any attempts of vengeance. I think things worked out for the best.
*Date that you regularly blow them out (birthday):* Oh, I get it now. That was your subtle way of asking how old I am, wasn't it Mr. Quiz Master? Well if you must know I'm 22, and my birthday is March 23.
*Pets*: You know, those dogs are mine by association. I had a pet, for a while at least, but I kept losing it so Tomoyo made me give it away. I'm going to miss that Iguana.
*Height*: I always find it interesting that people tend to give their height in inches in spite of America being the only country not to accept the metric system and all its glory. I'm about 182 cm and for those of you wondering it's about 6 ft.
*Eye colour*: Dazzlingly blue, don't you think Mr. Quiz Master? Oh go on you.
*Piercing*: The only holes in my body are the ones that were there when I was born.
HAVE YOU EVER...?
*Had the drink Calypso Breeze*? Yes, a bit too fruity for my tastes, but I guess some people like it that way. I was never much a fan of pineapple juice.
*Been in love*? Oh, how does the love of my life scorn me? Oh my breaking heart. How coulds't thou do this to me? Dost it not pain thee to say it? Oh love, why dost thou abuseth me so?
*Been toilet-papering*? I swear I only did it once after that. Ok, maybe there was that other time and yesterday but that wasn't a real house.
THE FUTURE:
*School*: would you believe that Oxford let me in? I mean me of all people.
*Where you want to live*: Wherever Tomoyo goes, that's where I want to be. Oh, my sweet, I would follow thee to the ends of the earth.
*How Many Kids You Want*: At least six.
*Girl names*: Aerial, Sakura, and Ra . . . wait, why am I even writing this? Did you not read Tomoyo's list Mr. Quiz Master sir? I have no say in the names of my children and it's a fact I must face sooner or later.
*Boy names*: I'm hoping she'll permit me an Eriol Junior, but at least some of the names she had down weren't too bad.
*What Kind Of Job you want*: I'd love to be teacher. I'm not sure why, but I think I'd actually be good at that. Better still, a Philosophy Lecturer or English Professor. I'd be perfect for the part.
*You want to get married*: If that wasn't a hint then I don't know what is. I shall refrain from answering this question just to spite you my sweet.
WHO:
*Makes you laugh The Most*: Everybody and everything. You are all equals in the Venn diagram of my joviality.
*Do You Go To For Advice or to talk About Things*: Myself. I give some excellent advice you know, but nobody ever seems to appreciate it.
*Who Do You Hate*: I have reached a stage of enlightenment where to deal with my anger I simply ensure that the feelings mutual. If you hate me, I probably hated you first.
*Knows The Most about You*: No one, I'm a secret. A man of mystery even. A riddle wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a puzzle wrapped in a conundrum wrapped in . . . Fine, Tomoyo it is but only if she admits that I know the most about her too.
*Is Your Best Friend*: Tomoyo of course, and not just because she's looming behind me as I write this. *waits for Tomoyo to leave the room* Yeah man, it's you.
*Has It Easier, Guys or Girls*: Guys, I've seen what it takes to make you look like that. It's not pretty and you wouldn't recognise them without it . . .
WHICH ONE?
*Croutons or Bacon Bits*: I finally worked out what this question was about. I always thought it was weird having bacon bits in salad, but its not about salad is it? It's about soup and bacon bits are apparently very acceptable in soup as opposed to being rather ironic in salad. Either way I'd still pick croutons, all I'm saying is that the questions not as stupid as I once thought it was. (A/N: I was tempted to put something in here about it being kosher because he seems the type to be Jewish but decided not to)
*2 doors or 4 (on a car)*: How many doors on an SUV?
Mr. Pibb or Dr. Pepper*: Well one of them is a doctor and the other is only a mister so obviously the doctors going to win given his qualifications. I find Dr. Pepper highly qualified for serving me beverages although to be honest I don't really like the taste of either.
*Coffee or Ice-cream*: The answer to this really depends on the skill of the barista and the flavour of the icecream. Is it hokey pokey? Please say its Goody-Goody Gumdrops.
*Shampoo or Conditioner*: I think its one of that two in one kind. Not that I know what conditioner is or anything.
*Bridges or Tunnels*: Brunnels. Now I'm not saying that they exist, but if they did, don't you reckon they'd be way cooler than those freakin' tridges?
*One pillow or two*: Two and I am not a pussy. There isn't anything under there, and if there was I'm sure it would have killed itself by now.
*Adidas or Nike*: Adidas, I'm not going to say it, but I think you know why.
*Nike or Reebok*: Nike, you know it comes from the ancient Greek word meaning . . . I forget but I'm sure it was really important.
*Adidas or Reebok*: I go back to my first choice here. I think you all know why. Yeah, Reebok's a girly brand.
WORD ASSOCIATION (FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND)
*Rock*: Pro-wrestling. As in the Rock. Or as he is now commonly known as these days, Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson.
*Green*: Grass, and by grass I mean the stuff that animals eat, not the illegal kind before anybody misconstrues and tries to arrest my ass. Who do you think I am? Harry Pothead? Just cos I wear glasses and talk in riddles. Geez people, talk about getting the wrong idea.
*Wet*: Rain, that stuff that gives life to grass. The legal kind. The other kind tends to use hydroponic systems, that while still essentially relying on rain for their sustenance, the causal chain is much longer and not particularly relevant and I am suddenly starting to understand a little bit of why so many people seem to think that I am on drugs.
*Cry*: Baby
*Peanut Butter*: Paddington. I'm not sure why it makes me think of him, cos I'm sure his vice was marmalade.
FAVORITES:
*Salad Dressing*: What's wrong with plain old Mayonnaise? I mean what's with all these fancy new kinds, though I must admit I do like Ranch dressing.
*Colour of socks*: Black
*Memory*: Remember that time with the sheep? And you were like woah, and I was like huh? And then you were all . . . ok maybe it's just me.
*Toothpaste*: The three-in-one kind. I do like to economise with hygiene, and I'm not even sure what the three things are it's supposed to do.
*Food*: I'm going to say sushi, and not because I'm trying to be funny or something, but because I actually do like sushi and am not specially partial to any particular type. And yes, Mr. Quiz Master, I know you thought that I was going to say sweets here but that's not so much of a food as a food group and not so much of a food group as an essential part of my Eriol-ness.
*Song at the moment*: Darkness 'I Believe in a Thing Called Love'.
*TV show*: The Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy, although I did prefer the radio serial.
*Toothbrush*: The three headed kind or the kind with the tongue scraper on the back.
*Subject in School*: Philosophy, it makes me all teary eyed just thinking about it.
*Flower*: Orchards.
*Colour*: Now, I really tried here, but there are only so many words to describe the colour black and only one of them was really any good. And so, my favourite colour is . . . Black. Although 'Onyx' is quite a good one. And I know that black isn't technically a colour – philosophically speaking it is the absorption of all colour which makes it not so much a single colour but all colours – but I googled myself and apparently that is in fact my favourite colour. And Tomoyo, darling, having black as your favourite colour doesn't automatically make you Emo, although I suspect some of my nesting habits may.
*NON-ALOHOLIC DRINK*: Apple juice.
*Sport to Watch*: Is cheerleading a sport?
*Country Song*: I'm starting to think that maybe this is actually asking for a song done by a country artist, as opposed to a national anthem. For anthems I'd have to go with the Royal Britannia ditty, even if it isn't the 'official' anthem, or even the 'non-official' anthem, but boy is it catchy. For country song by country artist I'd have to go with that ditty about the walking boots – that counts right?
*Sesame Street Character*: Definitely Count. I was always so impressed by his unique sense of style.
*Disney Character*: I'm a bit of a traditionalist here so I'm going to have to go with Donald Duck.
*Warner Brothers*: And now, in distinct contrast, my favourite Warner Bro's character is Daffy Duck. I like the way his head spins around when you shoot him LOL.
RANDOM QUESTIONS
*When was your last hospital check in*: I don't remember but that doesn't mean it wasn't recently.
*Do you drink*: only when I'm thirsty. Damn my mortal body, so many needs! If only I could go without liquid and water.
*How many times did you fail your permit and Drivers License Test?*: Once, but don't tell Tomoyo. I've got her believing I did it in one go and so far it seems to be working.
*Where do you see yourself in 10 years?*: About five steps to the left.
*Who is the last person that you got mail from before this one*? Just a nasty letter from Sports Illustrated. They said they'll revoke my subscription if I don't stop sending them the joke about the elephant in the microwave. These people have no sense of humour.
*Have you ever been convicted of a crime*? Nothing I care to admit to.
*Which single store would you choose to max your credit card*? The second had book shop around the corner. They have a first edition, in near mint condition, of the first Hitch Hikers book. It's practically priceless.
*What type of car you drive now*? Not that I actually end up driving it much, but when I do drive it's my SUV. I do love that car.
*What do you do most often when you are bored*? Think about driving my car. Philosophise about the end of the world. Re-read 'The Restaurant at the End of the Universe' in order to verify philosophical hypothesis'. That sort of cheery thing.
*Name the person that you are friends with that lives the farthest away from you*: Everyone. Ohhhhh, you're never too far away!!!!
*Are You in A Gang or Club*: Yes, but it's the kind of secret club that I'm not allowed to tell you about. Oh no, I've said too much.
*What Is Your Favourite Kind Of Clothes*: Ralph Laurens new fall line. Not that I know specifics or anything. Page 4 of the catalogue, you'll see what I mean.
*Are you Close Minded*: I'm closed minded about being closed minded.
*Are You Open Minded*: Yeah, closed minded people suck!
*Are You a Player*: Yes, I'm a player of many things. Of sports, or board games, of video games. A player indeed!
*Can u be in love with 2 people at the same time*? God, how could you? It's enough work just to keep one of them in check, imagine having two. Who would have the time or energy to be in love with two women at the same time?
*Humiliating Moment*: You remember, that time with the sheep and you were like woah and I was like huh and . . . never mind.
*Who do you think will respond to this fastest*? Still waiting on Naoko.
*Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to send back*? You, whoever you are, I doubt you'll reply. Damn piss head.
*what time is it now*: Time to party, that's what time it is. It's party time. Wooh!
*who's most likely not going to read this*: Blind people and people who don't like to read the crazed writings of lunatics. I pity those blind people, who on the other hand, do enjoy reading the crazed ramblings of mad men and are unable to do so. This is for you man!
*goals for this year*: have crazed writings taken out in Braille. Have a dictionary of Eriol-isms published – it should be a hit. Will also be available in Braille and audio book form narrated by William Shatner and Tori Spelling.
~ to be continued ~
I am suddenly aware of the fact that there isn't really much story to this chapter and that most of the word count is taken up by Eriol's made ramblings. Although, it's still shorter than Takashi (I was inspired) so that's something. I think I'm making good progress on this story. I've pretty much writer the last chapter (bar the epilogue, just to bring things to a nice close and bring it all back down after the climax) and it's all really a matter of getting to that point which isn't too bad.
So please, all of you review to tell me how good I am to actually update a story twice within the same month. I haven't done that since my first epic so it really is more incredible than you realize at first.