Welcome back to No Simple Thing. Ellie and Alex are in love, except for a few small problems. 1. Jasper and the others hate the wolves. 2. Jake, Leah and the others hate the vampires. And 3. Alec wants to take Ellie to the Volturi forever. Problems is an understatement.

As the curtain rises on Act III, an old character comes to the stage. Charlie Swan, Bella's father, is as sick of the fighting as Chief Roberts, and will do anything to help…

And so we continue into the play. Enjoy.

Act II, Scene III

Enter CHARLIE SWAN, talking on the phone to old friend Billy Black…

"Yeah, I dunno either, Billy," the old man said as he washed the dishes that had accumulated in his sink. "You'd think that now that they're older, they'd be past all this. I can't imagine what keeps setting 'em off."

He paused, then added, "Not to mention Leah isn't letting Bella be much of an emissary. That girl is something else. Jake must have the patience of a saint!" He laughed at something Billy said, then resumed his washing.

He was happy Bella was back. After traveling for all those years with Edward on business, then coming back with a baby girl in tow! Well, not a baby. Ellie was 16 now. Where had the years gone? It seemed like only the other day Bella was standing in his living room, newly arrived from Phoenix. She looked so different now, but then, the Cullens had to have some impact on her and her style.

He looked up from scrubbing a particularly stubborn piece of food when the doorbell rang. "Hang on, Billy, someone's at the door." Charlie, now well into his late 70's, walked slowly over to the front door of the house he had lived in for over 40 years.

Enter ALEX BLACK, here for advice on love and a plan of action from Charlie…

To his surprise, it was Alex at the door. Charlie looked him up and down. He was wearing what looked like a very torn up Army uniform, with dirt and leaves stuck into his floppy black hair. "Er, Billy?" he said slowly. "I gotta go, but I'll call you back later. Bye." Charlie hung up, then turned to Alex with a smile. "Alex, my boy," he said cheerfully. "Bit early for visiting, eh? Where's your dad?" He looked around Alex's bulk for Jake and (though he hoped not) Leah.

"I'm on my own today, Charlie," Alex said quietly. Charlie gave him an analytical stare. "You okay? You look like you haven't been home at all," he said disapprovingly. Alex smiled sheepishly. "Were you with that Katie girl?" he asked, still suspicious. Charlie was not a fan of Katie Newton. She had been caught one too many times getting into trouble with boys for a nice kid like Alex to be hung up on her.

Alex looked insulted. "No! Katie's just an old crush now, not her," he insisted. "Not her? Then who?" Charlie said, noticing Alex's slip of tongue. When Alex blushed, Charlie smirked. So it was a girl. But who?

Alex rubbed the back of his neck. "Well…" he said slowly, then very fast, "it's your granddaughter, to tell the truth."

Charlie blinked once. Twice. Three times. Then said, "Edward… will not be happy." The two of them laughed, and Alex grinned. "No, I didn't think he would be," he said. Charlie had a happy vision of Edward freaking out before Alex added, "But this could fix things."

Charlie narrowed his eyes. "How so?"

"Think about it!" Alex said enthusiastically. "Edward and Dad can't kill each other if Ellie and I are together. If we're married there has to be-"

"Married!?" Charlie yelped. The M-word! He and Renee's fatal mistake! "What do you mean, married!? She's 16!" "Which," Alex interceded, "is legal age to be married without parental consent." Charlie ground his teeth. He couldn't argue with that, not with being a retired police chief. He could still argue one point, though. "But you're so young!"

"Charlie," Alex said firmly. "I love her, and we can get some peace between Dad and the Cullens. Isn't this what you want?" Alex crossed his arms, and Charlie was reminded irresistibly of Jake defending his love for Bella in Edward's face in that very yard.

Charlie spluttered a bit. "But… you were all 'in love' with Katie Newton a week ago! If your affections are so fickle, why should I let you even touch my grandbaby!?" he bellowed. "Because it's different!" Alex defended himself. "You're 16, you have no idea what love is!" Charlie yelled. "Look, Charlie," Alex snapped. "I came to you for help for three reasons. One, you're a reasonable man and can see the advantages of me and Ellie doing this. Two, you love us both, and this is what would make us both happy. And three, you're a registered justice of the peace and won't rat us out to Edward." Smirking slightly, he added, "Can't you imagine the look on his face when he finds out?"

Alex knew he had Charlie when his face grew contemplative on the last sentence. Charlie could not deny that foiling the seemingly omniscient Edward would make him happy. After all, he owed Mr. Cullen one for taking his Bella away for so many years.

He weighed his options. Get back at Edward and make Ellie happy, or try to protect her like he tried to protect Bella. Because that second option worked out to well. He heaved a sigh. "If you break her heart, kid, I'll break you," he muttered, but nodded once and turned on the TV. "Any good games on?"

I love Charlie. Really, I do. Short but important ;). Yayness!