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Disclaimer: Anna Lyn Connor and other unknown characters belong to me. Everyone else (who is NOT in the movie) is real. Any of the enjoyable characters of James Cameron's movie belongs to him, along with all of the legalities and technicalities.
Author's note (March 2009): I. AM. SO. SORRY. If you want me to grovel at your feet, I will! It has been such a long time since I gave an update and I do sincerely apologise! It was a busy semester at school and life's trivialities have been keeping me occupied. I will finish this story for those who think I will not. I've outlined every detail in my journal so one way or another, Anna Lyn Connor and William Murdoch will have their story! So as an apology, I give you three chapters!
Truly, I want to thank those who have been reading and reviewing. Your profound support is what drives me to update and it constantly motivates me to share my story with you. I hope I didn't loose anyone in the delay and if I did, I hope you come back!
Asides from that, enjoy!
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11 April 1912 Late-Afternoon
"Mrs. Lyons is a dear friend of my wife so she was more than willing to accept the request..." Andrews took a moment to observe the woman beside him, trying to guess what she was thinking about.
She turned up to meet his gaze. He offered a kind smile to hide his curiosity. Blast him for intruding!
"Truly, Mr. Andrews. Along with bridge crew, the Marconi boys and the cordiality offered, it is more than I can ever repay back in one lifetime. I'm afraid I would be in debt with everyone forever!"
"Perhaps I cannot say anything for the rest of the bridge crew. However, Miss Connor, you owe me absolutely nothing."
Her eyes sparkled with a sense of confusion and astonishment that would never leave her.
A part of her feared that this was just a dream. At any moment, she would be awaken to tend to her domestic early morning duties, with her abusive husband waiting by her feet ready to whip her with his leather belt. She quickly turned her eyes away to not betray any emotions. "M-Mr. Andrews."
Andrews turned back to look at the corridor before them. "Now ma'am, 'tis best to save your energy rather than wasting it all on me trying to argue your point," he finished with a chuckle, trying to ease her tension. He felt a brick wall emanating from Anna, blocking from him her true thoughts and feelings. "Besides, you can never win!"
Anna let out a small laugh, despite her momentarily fear of being reminded of her other life. The laughter echoed in the space around them which caused a few of the passengers to look up at the strange visitor.
The rumours have spread like wild fire through the decks. So many tales were concocted on her behalf and most of them not exactly in the greatest light. Anna, however, protected by the warmth of the bridge was not harmed by any of the comments they secretly threw at her. Oh, the treachery of the first class and their privilege to paint other people's histories as they please.
Anna had seen the grand stairwell as well as the polished banister before, just a few hours ago on her own tour. Even the onlookers were the same. The same questionable looks. The same atrocious answers.
"I see you have taken a fancy of our officer," Andrews started off slyly, hoping she would not catch the tail end of the last word; it not being plural, implying that he was talking about only one officer and not all of them.
The corner of his eyes caught the blush creeping up her neck and settling in hotly on her cheeks. Andrews cursed himself for his lack of inconspicuousness! "W-what was it, Mr. Andrews?" Well, her flustering did confirm what he wanted to learn for himself: her affections for that certain officer.
"I'd said, I see you have taken a fancy of our officers," Andrews made sure to hiss the last 'S' for her to know that he was not a part of Lightoller's mischief.
Anna's blush never went away. "Oh..." she still fumbled with something to say. "They are very nice..." she finished lamely.
"Just nice?" He continued.
"And kind, amiable..." They stopped at a door and Andrews knocked on it before turning to her.
She furrowed her eyebrows tightly as a thought dawned on her. Was Thomas Andrews a part of Lightoller's band of mischief? She turned to meet him squarely in the eyes. Anna was hoping she would have Mr. Andrews, in the very least, Mr. Andrews, as her ally. "What are you trying to get at, Mr. Andrews?" She asked very frankly, so pointedly that he was thrown off balance for a quick second. However, Thomas Andrews was quick on his thoughts and gave her a gentle smile that told her nothing of his involvement. A smile that she could almost believe. Almost!
"Nothing, Miss Connor. Simply curiosity at its finest!"
Before she could reply, the door pulled open and a tiny maid stood, beckoning them into the room. She was expecting them.
"Mrs. Lyons," the young mousey maid turned on her polished heels to find her mistress. Anna looked at the clean and pressed maid and looked at herself. She was a poor comparison even to a maid! How gruesome she must look! The dirt and grim and...wait, did she smell? Inconspicuously, she bent her head close to her chest and sniffed. There was a scent, but nothing too bad. Did Andrews, Lightoller, Lowe, Moody or...or...Or! Did William Murdoch notice it? What if he did? What did he think? She sniffed again.
"Are you all right, Miss Connor?" Andrews asked with one eyebrow raised, looking questioningly at her.
Her head shot up as she was caught red handed sniffing herself.
"Dust, Mr. Andrews! Dust got into my nose!" Her voice rose a pitch, betraying her.
"Hmm...Dust, I see..." Andrews wasn't buying it.
"So, this is the girl?" The voice made Anna look around Andrews's body to the elderly woman standing poised in front of them. Her face was wrinkled with wisdom, her eyes judgemental, but kind in their demeanour.
"I'm hardly a girl, ma'am," Anna defended herself.
The woman chose to ignore her and waited for a proper introduction.
"This is Anna Lyn Connor, Mrs. Lyons."
"Of the Connors in Leeds perhaps?" She asked with a splash of surprise laced in her voice.
Anna looked up quickly to match the woman's eyes. She had not heard anyone refer to her family's association and heritage in such a long time. So much so that it frightened her. The history was now so foreign and old to her that she hardly remembered her life before her marriage.
Andrews looked to Anna at this new information. She never mentioned herself being a part of a prominent family. That would explain her sense of speech and manners.
"Yes, ma'am. We are no longer the known Connors of Leeds. Our legacy has tarnished and faded with time."
Mrs. Lyons made a click of her tongue. Something Anna had learned that was one of her signature traits. "A legacy, no doubt!"
Anna could only offer a kind smile, but she looked away from the woman, not being able to form a reply. It was too difficult to pull up the good of her past without reminding her of the bad of the present she just managed to escape from.
Andrews saw that and came to her rescue. "I leave you in good hands, Miss Connor!"
"I promise you, Thomas, the next time you see her, she will look like the Connor that she truly is!" Mrs. Lyons cheered while keeping her eyes on the frail and ill-formed Miss Anna Lyn Connor.
The guest of the two stepped forward to the master shipbuilder and smiled in gratefulness. "Mr. Andrews, I--"
"Please say no more, Miss Connor! Your appreciation is felt wholeheartedly. My only concern with you now is if you can find your way back to the bridge if you ever need to! I believe the officers would not mind if you would join them for a quick dinner."
"She does not need to go back to the bridge, Thomas! That is no place a woman!"
Andrews looked up at Mrs. Lyons and smiled pleasantly, giving no hints of what he was truly trying to do. "Just a mere concern if she had forgotten an article, perhaps!" Mrs. Lyons waved him off with her clicking tongue and waited for their exchange to be over.
Anna Lyn Connor narrowed her eyes. "Mr. Andrews, I sus--"
He cut her off again. "You know that bridge is always open to you. I'm sure the officer will not mind your return."
The woman blinked. Did he just do it again? "Come again, sir?" She played as if she could not hear him, but Andrews was always the quicker one!
"I'm sure the officers will not mind your return," Andrews again made sure the 's' after the word 'officers' was as pronounced as possible so she couldn't catch on to what he was trying to imply. Anna was trying to see beyond that carefree, pleasant smile, but nothing was there to prove to her that Mr. Thomas Andrews had a hand in Lightoller's matchmaking-headache-of-a-fun!
"Didn't you just say--"
"Never mind that, Miss Connor! You can't keep Mrs. Lyons waiting." Thomas Andrews bowed to both of the females in the room, donned his hat and stepped to the door gallantly, not allowing Anna to finish any of her sentences. She furrowed her eyebrows at him momentarily but eased into a smile. Maybe he was just in a haste to go to tea or to the water closet!
Maybe Thomas Andrews wasn't involved in the hoopla of the bridge--actually, the hoopla of Charles Lightoller. Anna decided that he was an ally she could count on and smiled even more firmly as he was saying his final good byes.
She watched him pull the door close but without one final statement that shattered her hopes of ever escaping Lightoller's mischief cleanly. "Don't keep him waiting..." And instantly, she knew that Thomas Andrews was in on the games also.
- - -
"Do you think she is ever going to come back to the bridge, Lights?" Murdoch asked nonchalantly as he was 'leisurely' enjoying his off-watch with his old friend.
Lightoller smirked before turning his head slightly. "Why? You miss her already, Will?" Lightoller teased, but before his friend could argue, he pushed on forward. "Perhaps! Knowing Miss Connor like we know her for the few hours we had with her, the company she would like to keep is perhaps that of us. Besides, we need another hand at the poker table any ways..." he faded off into his own thoughts while Murdoch was stuck in his. "I wonder if she can play," Lightoller mumbled, scanning the blue horizon.
Even though Lightoller may seem absent from their conversation, he was alert to what Murdoch may say next. He wanted to prompt Murdoch into saying something. However, after being caught red handed eavesdropping on his cabin door had already betrayed Murdoch's trust in him. Lightoller could not afford another misstep if he ever wanted to continue bringing these two together!
"You don't think the first class hospitality would appeal to her more than the bridge's hospitality?" Murdoch asked his friend with a small smile, knowing Lightoller would come up with some type of joke to take his mind off Anna Lyn Connor; something he shouldn't have his mind on in the first place. It was for two reasons: one, he was a naval officer and two, they'd just met a few hours ago! Too soon for even a proper friendship! It took years of struggle to form a friendship with Lights! Struggle, pain, humiliation, and a few good laughs here and there, but more of the pain and humiliation though. Oh the pranks...They bring back a dark past.
"Why, Mr. Murdoch! I'm surprised at you..." Lightoller laughed. "I think the finest hospitality there is, is from the bridge crew of the RMS Titanic! We officers are amiable, honourable, and even for the jaded, fashionable! Even our young Mr. Moody looks dashing!" Moody turned around to rise a questionable eyebrow. "We are definitely hospitable enough to welcome Miss Connor and you, Will." That caused Murdoch to narrow his eyes at his friend. "are definitely more willing to--"
"Oh, just shut it, Lights. I've heard it all before," Murdoch groaned before walking away with a small smile at the thought.
"You can't hide what you can't deny!"
- - -
"You are a mess, young lady," Mr. Lyons said so frankly that it made Anna feel so ashamed of her appearance. "A corset?"
"N-not a proper one, ma'am." Mr. Lyons clicked her infamous tongue again. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.
"That will not do at all!" She turned on her heels to leave poor Anna Lyn Connor to stand shabbily in the middle of the lush room. "Jane! Run the bath!"
All in one breath, Mrs. Lyons whisk Anna into the bath, ordered her to strip down to barebones, step into the bath and left without another word or request. Anna was left awestruck with the mousey maid. She waited for Anna with a kind smile.
"I-I can wash myself, thank you." Anna didn't like the thought of people babying her. It was already strange being waited upon to help with the bath.
The mousey maid's expressions changed so violently that it surprised Anna. "Mrs. Lyons would scold me, Miss! She is very old fashioned and she expects me to help you in washing and dressing."
"That's absurd!" cried Anna with a smile of disbelief. She never remembered any part about her maid waiting to help her bathe from her life before her marriage. Her old maid Bertha never even picked up a bar of soap for Anna, let alone help her lather and rinse! How the times have changed....not forward, but backwards?
"Please ma'am," the maid named Jane looked towards the door in fear.
Anna instantly felt pity for her and semi-nodded, giving in slightly, complying with her benefactor's rules. "In the very least, can you please turn around so I can undress and get into the tub?"
The maid understood and turned. Anna sighed deeply while unbuttoning her dirty blouse. The only other person who had ever seen her naked grown body was her husband. But then again, that was a past that she was more than willing to erase. From the way he stared at her (whether it was lust or hatred) and the way he ran his grimy, hungry hands across her skin, she wanted to scrub every bit away until she felt her skin stinging raw.
She dropped her once beautiful chocolate brown skit which was now grey, to the floor. Even her pantaloons had seen better days. Though the lace on it was well preserved and taken care so deeply for. To Anna, it was one of her most prized possessions. It was the only present she had from the life before her marriage. A present from her mother...
Uncertain of when she was supposed to turn, the maid turned prematurely and caught a glimpse of the freckle dotted skin of the experienced Anna Lyn Connor. She was so skinny that you could see each vertebrae and her shoulder blades shaped like wings. The maid turned away shyly, in fear of getting caught.
Anna stepped into the warm water and felt her muscles unravel at its knots and the years of hardship left her body instantly. She gave an approved sigh.
"M-may I turn around now, Miss?" the maid asked.
"Yes, if you must."
Jane the maid turned to see Anna submersed dreamily into the frothy goodness of the first class bath. Her hair fanned out like seaweed on the foam.
"How is the life here on the Titanic?" Anna asked as Jane poured a jug of water over her head to rid of the shampoo lather.
"As the same as the life on any other ocean liner," the maid replied pointedly as if it was the most common knowledge in the world, momentarily ignorant of Anna's background. "I've had the privileged to be on the Olympic and to me, even her sister is not as grand as the Titanic!" She then giggled in the young girl type of way. A giggle Anna no longer could conjure up even in the presence of a certain officer! Even if she tried her hardest at flirting! "I know the crew well and many of them I've met before."
"It sounds like you have an acquaintance of your admiration?"
"Just an acquaintance, Miss Connor," the maid said hurriedly. She was caught in her secret. She was eager to change the subject. "And what of yourself, Miss Connor?"
Anna, who was playing with the bubbles, smiled gently at the gleaming orb in her hands. Her reflection came off the thousands of bubbles that were floating in the water. "I'm enjoying what is permitted of me."
The maid was confused. "What do you mean?"
"The people that I've met so far, the bridge--her officers and crew--have been so kind to me and not to mention, Mr. Andrews! And then, there are also the novelty things I have not experience for years, such as a leisure stroll with an officer! Imagine me, Jane, things of that nature so regal and grand for a woman who have fallen so drastically to the lower class!"
"Though you speak so eloquently, Miss Connor!"
Anna turned around and smiled mysteriously at the maid who clearly saw a memory passing in the older woman's eyes. "When the Lusitania and the Majestic were in their prime, Jane." The maid gave Anna a confused look at her cryptic message.
"Jane!" Mrs. Lyons voice shot into the bath loudly, breaking the intensity that was filling the room.
"Ma'am..."Jane hurriedly removed her hands from the water and stood up as the majestic Mrs. Lyons swept into the room.
"Miss Connor, are you clean now to your liking?" Mrs. Lyons ended with a smile that told Anna that she was merely teasing.
Anna smiled grandly and nodded. Jane quickly fetched a large white towel for her as she rose out of the water, her hair sleek against her back. Mrs. Lyons took an approving look at her. Anna's green eyes sparkled and intensified in the light.
Mrs. Lyons didn't click her tongue this time. "You are a Connor, indeed..."
- - -
"How about dinner? Do you think she would come back for dinner?" Murdoch asked. "I'm asking too much. At least one dinner?" He and Lightoller were sitting on a bench near the bridge, gazing out into the sea. They started talking about other things. Trivial things such as the taxes they might have to pay next year; what Sylvia had said about the gifts from America; their past ships; their current route and yet, somehow they had managed to circle back to the topic of everyone's conversation: Anna Lyn Connor.
Well, at least Lightoller was content in knowing that he might actually win the bet that was going around the bridge and other unnamed patrons. He was a bad hand in cards, but perhaps his luck was finally changing. Make me some money, Will. Sylvia needs a new garter!
"Oh Goodness, Will" He then turned the on-duty third officer. "Mr. Pitman, there is no escaping his inferno questioning!"
Pitman smiled. "It seems like you have all the answers, Mr. Lightoller."
"Maybe so!" Lightoller cheered in an agreement.
"Lights, you'd started this mess and you will end it!" Murdoch sighed, shaking his head.
Lightoller whipped his head around and grinned. "Of course, just make love to her!"
"Lights!" Murdoch hissed in disbelief. His face wasn't twisted in any type of humour.
"I'm merely stating a solution, Mr. Murdoch!"
- - -
Jane worked at Anna's long hair as Mrs. Lyons brought out a few boxes from her closet.
"Mrs. Lyons has a daughter in London. She goes through clothes as quickly as she does with tea," Jane whispered when she was pinning a braid. Anna gave a slight nod as she continued to watch Mrs. Lyons rummage through the boxes.
"I can't let you go out in dark blue, neither can I allow you to--"
Anna smiled at the fussing woman and allowed her thoughts to drift. She wondered what Thomas Andrews was doing at this moment? Or Jack and Fabrizio and Tommy, were they causing mischief? Speaking of mischief what about Mr. Charles Lightoller? Was he doing something to annoy the other officers at this moment? Poor Mr. Lowe and Mr. Moody, how they must put up with the seniority that Mr. Lightoller was capable of! But doesn't Mr. Wilde have the authority to at least tame--well is tame the proper word for it? --Mr. Lightoller from torturing the boys so harshly. What about Mr. Murdoch? Being his dearest friend, could he do something to stop Lightoller's games...
Mr. Murdoch, he should--
Anna's eyes flickered back to her reflection at the thought of him. The reflection that stared back at her: this woman in a dressing gown, her hair pinned intricately above her head was not the same woman he had seen before. She was no longer the dirty and atrociously smelling Anna Lyn Connor they had caught down in the holds. Will he like her the same? No, no no, she meant they--all of the officers! Will they like her all the same? Not him. But, what will he think about her appearance now? Did William Murdoch have a preference? Was it her? Copper brown hair and green eyes? Thin?
"Anna?"
After hearing her name, her attention snapped back to Mrs Lyons. "Yes?"
"I've been calling your name for quite a while now. What are you thinking about?" The two women behind her gazed at her curiously. A blush crawled up her neck and onto her cheeks. "J-just about..." she faded off, fearing her words would betray her thoughts. She can't have, 'I'm thinking about William Murdoch--the first officer of the Titanic's--preference on women!' coming out of her mouth.
"I'll leave it to you then," Mrs. Lyons concluded, not wanting to hear anything else. She was old enough to know which personal thoughts should be left unspoken. "Jane will help you with the corset."
Anna's face darkened at the word corset. Jane saw the look on her face and smiled. "I promise not to do it too tight.
With each tug of the corset and each painful yelp from Anna, her feminine figure that was hidden away by neglect was pulled into place. Mr. Lyons came back with a dress in hand. A cream and shady blue one with divine lace and pearl buttons. The elderly woman with the most pristine Gibson hairstyle showed it to Anna who had to fight the temptation to touch what didn't belong to her.
"Give this a try..."
The silk reawakened memories that were familiar to her and it still felt like gentle fingertips running across her skin. The lace tickled the top of her neck as she buttoned the last pearl to the top. Jane brushed the bottom of the skirt down before standing up to admire this woman. She did not look like the same woman who came through the cabin door about an hour ago with Mr. Thomas Andrews.
"Well? Don't just stare at me like that, Miss Jane. How do I look?"
"I believe you look magnificent, Miss Connor."
"And I concur!" Mrs. Lyons came back out with a pair of gemstone earrings. "I will order some dinner in for you, so you will not have to suffer the initiation of the first class on your first night. Also I don't exactly know if Thomas had informed you that I only have the sofa, a few pillows and a blanket to offer you."
Anna was silent for a moment as she situated the earrings on and thought for an appropriate reply. She would have been happy with a bench on the deck, but something was weighing heavily on mind. Actually, it was weighing a lot more heavily on her heart.
A fear gripped her as she thought herself as a prisoner, not being able to receive a headache from Charles Lightoller or a riveting argument with Harold Lowe or sharing childhood stories with James Moody and the best part of being around the bridge from what she'd learned from her short time, was having her heart flutter fervently at the thought of the one and only William Murdoch. But was she at a privilege to choose? After all, she did illegally earn a place on board the ship.
"Is that going to be all right, Miss Connor? I imagine you have nothing else to choose but the floor!"
"The sofa is fine, Mrs. Lyons. I thank you wholeheartedly. But may I make a request?" Both the maid and the elderly Dame looked at her expectantly. Neither of them beckoned her to go on. Anna cleared her throat before continuing, not knowing how to phrase her request as lightly as possible. "May I attend dinner with the officers?" Mrs. Lyons was about to open her mouth to protest but Anna hurried on. "To thank them properly for all that they have done for me. Considering the situation that I am placed in and the kindness they had offered for an unwelcoming recipient such as myself!"
Mrs. Lyons looked at the younger woman sternly. With her eyes wide, Anna looked like a girl in her teens begging her grandmama if she could attend a party. She wavered for a few moments before turning to Jane with a defeated look. "Fetch a steward, please Jane."
The maid curtsied. She was excited for Anna to have her wish concurred to. The maid as well as Mrs. Lyons (who wished to ignore it) had a notion that Anna had an admiration for one of the said officers of the bridge. Mrs. Lyons would only humour her because she knows who Anna Lyn Connor truly is and who her family is. It was almost up to Lady Catherine Lyons to protect Anna until they reach New York.
"Thank you, Mrs. Lyons!" Anna smiled her grandest that even the old Dame could not resist.
"I shall send word to the officers to be expecting you. The Lord only knows if they can receive a woman properly." With that, Mrs. Lyons retreated to her writing table and penned the quick note. Anna sat back in her chair and smiled at her reflection, checking if it was appropriate for that one said officer.
- - -
"Mr Murdoch, sir..." Murdoch turned around to see the pleasant young steward standing there with a note in his hand.
"Mr. George, what can I do for you, sir?"
George handed him the crisped note and smiled. "Compliments of a Lady Catherine Lyons."
"Thank you." Murdoch took the note that was handed to him and looked at it curiously. He doesn't know any of the passengers yet and he had not heard of a Lady Lyons before on his previous posts. Then it dawned on him that it must be the patron who took Annie in.
He quickly ripped the envelope open and read the contents on the small note card.
"Have your prayers been answer?" Lightoller asked nonchalantly coming up beside his friend.
"She's coming to dine with us," Murdoch said lightly but with a smile plastered heavily on his face.
"I don't understand why she would want to dine with us, because compared to the first class dining options, we lack the finesse." Murdoch didn't answer, but shook his head to his friend, telling Lightoller that he was still listening.
"What? You don't think so, Chap, that we can be getting better dinners than what we are being served everyday? You are quite the modest White Star Line employee!"
"Besides the food, Lights, I believe her company would make our dinner much better!"
Lightoller couldn't help but smile in an agreement. Dinner was about to be served in an hour or so. "I can only imagine, Will."
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