Alright! Time for Emmett's list to Rosalie! Keep the reviews coming until you guys hit 1,000!

Chapter 4

Rosalie's List

Emmett put on Rosalie's clothes for effect. Rosalie was growling at him, but Esme told her to quiet down, so we could listen to Emmett talking, which made Emmett feel good about himself. Idiot.

"Alright, Rosalie has to obey all these rules!"

1. No punching Emmett.

Rosalie was next to him, and she punched him. "What are you going to do about it?" Esme sprayed her with the window cleaner bottle. She shrieked in surprise, "I'm not a bad dog!"

"Well, you're close to it, so settle down, or I'll spray you again!"

Emmett cleared his throat.

2. You have to listen to Emmett's ideas.

Rosalie growled, "That doesn't mean I'm going to agree with them."

3. You are not allowed to pull Emmett's ear when you don't like his ideas. It hurts!

Rosalie pulled his ear, and Esme sprayed her again. Emmett laughed like a hyena, and Esme sprayed his as well. "Behave!"

4. You will laugh at Emmett's jokes.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Wait, was that a joke?"

Esme groaned and snatched the list from Emmett, who was now mimicking Rosalie, by walking and shaking his butt at the same time. Esme sprayed him.

5. If Emmett wants a french kiss, then you will kiss him.

"Actually, let's change that rule. If Emmett wants a french kiss, then he can make-out with my butt for all he wants!" I laughed at her as she stuck her butt out towards him. Esme sprayed both of them.

6. You must hunt with Emmett, not Alice and Jasper.

Nothing.

7. You have to kiss Emmett at least twenty times a day.

A muffled giggle filled the room, though I wasn't sure who it was from. Esme sprayed the room, and it was gone.

8. You have to hug Emmett at least fifty times a day.

Emmett smiled evilly. I don't think a hug would satisfy him as much as the next thing would.

9. You have to make love to Emmett at least four times a week.

"I think once every month will be enough."

Emmett groaned, but quickly covered, for Esme sprayed him. "What was that for?" She glared at him and glanced back the list.

"Let's hurry up with this!"

10. You have to say, "Oh, Emmett! I love you!" everyday.

Emmett ignored Esme and mimicked a lovey-dovey face and got sprayed.

11. You have to call Carlisle Gramps and Esme Grammy.

Gasps escpaed Carlisle's and Esme's mouths as Emmett burst into laughter. He held his stomach, fell on the floor, smashed into Jasper, and got sprayed mercilessly.

"Emmett, enough with the interruptions!"

12. You have to call Emmett 'handsome' every day.

13. You have to make love to Emmett at least FIVE times a week.

"Wha-"

Rosalie quickly shut her mouth as Esme glared at her.

14. You have to tell every living thing in this house how much you love Emmett at least once evry day.

15. You have to make love to Emmett at least SIX times a week.

16. Bottom line, you have to make love to Emmett at least once a day.

"I'll start now!"

She got up and kicked him in the private, "There's today's love. Wait until tomorrow." He fell to the floor painfully, and Esme sighed, not bothering to spray her anymore. It wasn't helping.

"You kids are so off today."

17. Ummm... follow the rules 1-4.

18. Ugh... follow the rules 5-8?

19. Hmmm... I guess follow the rules 9-12.

20. Follow the most important rule, which is sixteen.

Rosalie sighed in relief, happy that it was over.

"Who has Emmet's list?"

"I do!"

It was Alice?

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