Author- Luna P aka Nikki
Rating- R/M, still don't get the new rating system --U
Warnings- Wincest, angst, language, I think the incest is the major thing here, oh and there's slash n.n enjoy.
Disclaimer- Ah, not again, nope I don't own Supernatural or any of the characters, infact the only thing I own is the plot, I hope that's something n.n
Summary- What exactly did Sam say to Dr Ellicot and what if Dean somehow found out?
Thanks to all reviewers, you guys made my day, glad you liked n.n
A/N- sorry this took so long for me to get up, computer troubles n.n
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Suffocating Silence…
Dean sighed as he fell against the wood of the bathroom door, tears burning the backs of his eyes just begging to be shed. He bit his lip and forced them away, Dean Winchester wouldn't be weak, couldn't be. He took a deep breath and walked over to the sink, staring at his reflection for the briefest of moments before his hand moved to the red shirt he was wearing over the grey T-shirt. He removed it slowly, trying not to move his shoulder too much, when the shirt was discarded on the floor he turned his attention to the grey T-shirt, that one soon following the red button down shirt lying on the floor.
He stared at what was quickly becoming an angry looking dark purple bruise covering his entire shoulder. He touched it gingerly, hissing at the pain caused by the sudden pressure. It was just a bruise, it would heal by itself in a few days, he'd known that straight away but it had been a great way to slip away from Sam. To hide from him, which is what he needed to do right now. His head pounded and he pushed the heels of his hands against his eyes, trying to dull the pain. It didn't work it never worked,
"He doesn't like to have serious conversations, hates to talk about his emotions or emotions of any kind, he's egotistical, kind of a slut." The words echoed inside his skull, Sam's voice telling some stranger how much of a screw up his older brother was. How much he hated him. How little he thought of him. Dean swayed slightly and braced his hands against the sink basin, steadying himself. "He's kind of a slut," He shivered and glanced up, staring at his reflection, the deep purple bruise the first thing that caught his gaze. Then he locked eyes with his reflection. Hazel eyes narrowed,
"It's understandable though, isn't it?" Dean questioned himself, eyes dark, "you are a slut, a hunting dog, everything Sammy said is true it just hurts so goddamned much because it was Sam who said it. And he said it with such contempt." There was a gentle knock on the door, closely followed by a hesitant voice.
"Dean… are you ok?" Sam asked through the wood, but Dean didn't respond, he wasn't ok he knew it and Sam knew it too. He was far from being ok, had been for a long time, he was breaking and he didn't think he could stop it anymore.
"Slut," had he said that or had it been the reflection, the reflection of his fucked up soul, "slut," Sam's voice whispered inside his head, and that one stung more. It repeated inside his head over and over again, the reflections eyes narrowed, its head turned to the left and a smirk appeared on its lips. It wasn't Dean anymore, it was something else, but Dean was too out of it to notice. "You're a slut Dean Winchester and you're not worth anything to anyone, you're a weak pathetic little brat who whores himself away because he can't do anything else." The reflection explained, flickering slightly, "slut" he pressed his hands against his ears trying to block everything out. It wouldn't work against the voices inside his head though.
"Dean!" The knocking had become more frantic but Dean couldn't hear that anymore, couldn't hear Sam screaming his name, could only hear the Sam inside his head.
"Come on Dean, don't tell me you haven't noticed, you're a slut, just ask Sammy," he snapped, simple as that. He couldn't listen to it anymore, with a low growl he struck out, hitting the mirror and watching as it shattered into a thousand pieces due to the force. He sighed and ran his hands over his face as the last few remaining shards of glass rained down onto the floor.
"Dean! Dean open the fucking door NOW!" Sam ordered, Dean sighed, turning on the tap and running his now blood-covered hand under the cold water. "Dean come on, I'm serious, open the door, Dean…" Sam begged and something in his voice made Dean turn around and walk towards the door, unlocking the door and stepping out into the bedroom. Standing right infront of Sam and smiling softly.
"Calm down Sammy," he muttered, trying to keep his hand hidden from his younger brother, Sam wasn't stupid though and caught sight of the blood. He moved quickly seizing Dean's hand in his and staring into his eyes.
"What the fuck did you do?" Sam growled,
"Took out some frustration, let it go Sammy,"
"It's Sam and no, what the fuck is wrong with you? Since when do you care what I think of you Dean?" Dean growled slightly and stepped closer to Sam, eyes narrowing dangerously.
"I've always cared about what you thought of me Sam, I never cared what anyone else thought or said but you I expected, I needed you to understand." Dean explained through clenched teeth, his eyes locking with those of his baby brother's. Sam's forehead creased in confusion slightly,
"Dean, I… what I said, I was mad at you for always ordering me around, I didn't mean it, Dean… I… I'm sorry…" Sam explained, voice soft, and the look in Dean's eyes told him that his apology hadn't been enough. There was a long silence before Sam glanced back down at Dean's hand, "does it hurt,"
"More than you know," And Sam knew that he wasn't talking about his hand but the proverbial knife now lodged inbetween his shoulder blades.
"Come on, I'll take care of that for you," Sam explained gesturing towards the cuts on Dean's hand. Dean just allowed Sam to lead him to the bed where he sat down on the edge, it didn't take long for Sam to clean and bandage the wounds and he did so in silence, because what could he say? He finished wrapping Dean's hand and stood from the bed staring down at his brother. "How's your shoulder?"
"Just a little bruised it'll be fine," Dean sighed glancing up to meet his younger brothers gaze, "did you find anything out about the Asylum?" Dean asked, changing the subject for the sake of both of their sanity's. Sam sighed and sat down next to Dean on the edge of the bed the gap between them, minimal though it was, seemed massive.
"Uh… not a lot. I couldn't find anything about what had happened there originally but I did find this blog that one of the kids in the town put up a while ago. It said about how several kids had ended up dead a few weeks ago and that there was no explanation for their deaths. The kid thought that something paranormal might have happened there." Sam explained running a hand through his hair as he leant back on his elbows, staring up at the ceiling.
"Smart kid know who is he, might be a good idea to talk to him, find out what he knows," Dean suggested softly.
"Uh… from what I gathered he's the son of the local sheriff," Sam said with a yawn, Dean chuckled slightly, running his hand over his face.
"Kid could have a lot of important information at his fingertips, we definitely have to go pay him a visit." Dean noted, after all being the son of the sheriff meant that he could have access to thousands of files, even those dating back to the time when Rosenkreuz was up and swinging. Of course if the kid were playing the role of the obedient son then it would be extremely hard to convince him to betray his fathers trust and get them the files they needed.
"That's what I thought, we can swing round tomorrow, apparently schools out and being Sheriff his dad will probably be at the station all day meaning that we can talk to the kid without his father standing over him. I figure that he'll be more willing to talk with us that way." Sam explained, lying down on the bed and staring at Dean's back.
"Yeah, after that we'll check out the Asylum, I want to get a look at the place during daylight hours first." Dean voiced, "hopefully they'll fix that fucking mirror before we get back," Dean half joked as he continued to stare at the patch of carpet that had captivated him for the past few minutes. Sam reached out, going to place his hand on Dean's bare back, he stopped halfway there, his hand pausing mid-air, never actually coming into contact with his older brother's skin.
"They'll clean it up at least, you'll have to pay for it you know," Dean shrugged
"Whatever, it's not my name on the credit card anyway," and Sam couldn't help but smile because that was such a Dean thing to say. "Well it's late, or early, I don't know about you but I want to get some sleep," Dean announced, standing from the edge of the bed and stripping down to his boxers. Sam didn't want to have to get up and go back to his own bed, but he was fairly certain that that's what Dean was hinting that he do. He had liked the other night, sleeping in the same bed as his older brother. Feeling Dean's body against his own, it had just felt so right and for the first time in God knows how long Sam had actually had a good nights sleep.
Dean turned to face Sam looking down at his baby brother who was staring up at the ceiling with a faraway look in his eyes. He sighed, running a hand through his hair, he wished that things weren't so fucked up between them, really wished it, but they were and he had no idea what to do about it or how to make things right between them again. All he knew was that they couldn't go on pretending that everything was ok when it so clearly wasn't.
"Do you want me to take the other bed?" Dean asked quietly causing Sam to snap out of his internal musings, and the hurt in Sam's eyes at that moment made Dean feel like such a bastard. Sam had always had that ability, to make Dean feel guilty over the smallest of things.
"No," he had said it with such sadness and then he had not said anything else. Dean just stared down at him wanting so desperately to say 'I can't do this Sammy.' But the words never made it past his lips because he knew that Sam always slept better when they slept in the same bed and no matter how much Sam had hurt him; Dean would always give his baby brother whatever he wanted. Dean would always put Sam before himself no matter how much it hurt him, because he loved him. It was as simple as that.
"Fine, fine, whatever," Dean sighed sliding underneath the covers as Sam stood up to get undressed, a few seconds later Sam slid in beside his brother. Staring at Dean's back once again, he shifted as close to his older brother as possible without actually touching him. Dean was allowing him to share his bed but Sam knew that the physical aspect would be too much for him deal with right now. So, as much as he wanted to hold Dean, as much as he wanted to comfort him, to comfort himself, he repressed the urge to reach out and wrap his arms round his older brother, to hold him close.
"Thank you Dean," Sam whispered, watching as Dean's shoulder's moved, indicating that he had just shrugged.
"Stop being such a girl and go to sleep Sammy," Dean ordered, then cringed, Sam didn't like it when he ordered him to do things did he? He sighed, shaking the thought away before glancing over at the empty bed, "and if you're going to be sleeping in my bed all the time then stop making me pay for two fucking beds." Dean half joked, trying to lighten the mood despite himself and how he was currently feeling. Sam just smiled softly, allowing his eyes to fall closed and for sleep to consume him.
XxxxxX
Sam woke up the next morning to see Dean sat at the edge of the bed, cradling his head in his hands. He slowly sat up, leaning against the bed's headboard, unsure of what to say to Dean. All he really wanted to do was to hold him but Dean wouldn't allow that, least of all now. So for what felt like an eternity he just resigned himself to sitting there and staring at his older brother's back. Eventually he broke the silence, though hesitantly,
"Dean… is… is everything ok?" He asked then frowned at the way that had sounded, not only had he sounded pathetic but he had asked a stupid question. Of course Dean wasn't ok, he knew what Sam had said about him to Dr Ellicott and no matter how much Sam wished he could take those words back, he knew that he would never be able to. He knew that Dean would never forget them, that Dean would never forget that Sam had shot him in that Asylum, shot him with rock salt but shot to kill. He had pulled the trigger on his brother twice, once being fully aware that the bullet would kill his brother. He was grateful that Dean had given him an unloaded pistol and not trusted him to not shoot him, because if he had then he would be dead now. "Dean?"
"I'm fine Sam, just thinking," Dean explained, voice harsh, he didn't want things to be the way they were between him and Sam, so distant, so clinical, but he didn't know how to get things back to the way they had once been. He didn't know how to stop Sam's voice from echoing in his head, screaming out every little fault that Dean possessed, didn't know how to stop seeing Sam stood over him, gun pointed at his heart, ready to kill, wanting to kill. His hand shook and he clenched it into a fist, noting the sensation of his nails biting into the soft flesh coating his palm. Sam screamed inside his head and he winced, why wouldn't it just stop? What would it take to make it stop?
"Do you want to go get something to eat?" Sam asked, standing from the bed and beginning to change, Dean didn't respond, just gave a shrug, Sam couldn't recall a time when Dean had been so silent, when Dean hadn't had an answer or a witty comeback for everything. "I saw a diner not so far from here, afterwards we can swing round to that kid's," Sam explained, buttoning up his shirt and grabbing his jacket from the chair over in the corner.
"Yeah, whatever, where does the kid even live?" Dean asked, running a hand through his hair as he stood from the bed and began to change himself. Sam just stared over at Dean, noting the angry looking purple bruise on his shoulder; the gash on his forehead had begun to heal nicely though. The skin around the wound had lost the reddish tint that it had held last night and the bandages on Dean's hand were only lightly spotted with blood. All in all he looked like he had been in a fight somewhere, and perhaps he had, a fight with himself and the inner turmoil he was trying so desperately to hide.
"Um… in the woods actually, just on the edge of the town,"
"Near the Asylum?"
"Uh, no, quite some distance from it actually," Sam explained as he watched Dean slide on a blue shirt over the black T-shirt and sit on the edge of the motel bed, unwrapping the bandages and staring at the wound. He had several gashes running across his knuckles, and the skin that lay around the wound there still looked sore. He slowly began to flex his hand, curling it into a fist and then uncurling it.
"Ok then, let's go," Dean explained, grabbing his leather jacket and slipping it on before heading towards the door. Sam caught up with his brother before he had the chance to leave the room, placing his hand on his shoulder gently. Dean glanced back at him, eyes slightly narrowed though he forced them to soften. He didn't want to hurt Sam.
"Do you want me to re-bandage your hand before we go?" Dean just sighed and shook his head, glancing down at the cuts scattered across his fist.
"No, it's stopped bleeding, it'll be fine, come on, I want to go see the Asylum some time this morning." Dean explained as he slipped out of the door and headed towards the Impala, considering he's crashed it yesterday it didn't look too bad. Only a scratch running along the side and a slight dent in the bumper, both his car and he himself could have come off a lot worse at the speed he was going. With a slight sigh he unlocked the doors and slid into the driver's seat. As Sam slid in beside him he placed the keys in the ignition, turning them until the car roared to life. He placed the car into drive and sped out of the parking lot.
They didn't speak much driving to the diner or when they were actually eating and it wasn't a comfortable silence either. It was the kind of silence that began to eat away at you with each minute that you spent in it, nipping at your soul and telling you that you should say something to fill the void, as you just sit there and ponder what exactly you could say. Sam had several things that he could say, but he didn't think that it was the right time to say them. Dean just didn't want to speak, everything he said to Sam at the moment seemed to sound choked or forced and he for one would rather sit in the suffocating silence than try to express how he was feeling at that precise moment in time.
They paid and left the diner, Sam biting his lip as they walked to the car, still in that insatiable silence. He had never wished for Dean to start picking on him for being too feminine more in his life. Right now he probably would have kissed Dean for calling him a bitch, for quipping about his 'psychic tendencies.' Dean didn't speak though and as Sam slid into the car the Metallica tape began playing to cover the almost deafening silence that seemed to hang over them wherever they went recently.
He wanted to grab Dean by the collar and scream for him to just get over this whole situation to try to make him understand that he hadn't really meant what he said. Sure Dean pissed him off sometimes but they were brothers it was to be expected. He was angry at Dean sometimes but he loved him constantly. Surely Dean knew that. He just sat there, staring silently at his brother and contemplating this thought and Dean drove away from the diner. He turned to look at Sam, their gazes locking for the briefest of minutes before Dean pulled away to look at the road ahead.
"So, what's the kids name?" Dean asked, breaking the silence at long last, Sam's sigh of relief however was drowned out by the Metallica tape.
"Uh… Alex, Alex Macabre,"
"Nice name," Dean said softly, turning away from the main road and onto a smaller one that led off into the forest. "Sheriff Macabre has a sort of ring to it don't you think?" Sam nodded; chuckling softly as the trees shielded the minimal light from them, leaving them in darkness. The day was unpleasant again, cloudy and drizzling with rain, still, both brothers couldn't help but prefer this sort of weather to bright blue skies and scorching heat, it just seemed to suit them.
"Why do you think they're covering all of this up Dean?" Sam asked, afraid to lose the conversation and be plunged into silence once again. Dean shrugged, hands tightening around the wheel as he turned onto another road.
"Maybe because they're afraid of what people will think if they know, maybe because they don't know how to explain what's going on up there and don't want to scare the locals. Or maybe they do know what's going on up there and simply don't want to admit to it." Dean explained softly, almost philosophically, and he'd looked so distant as he'd said it, as if lost in his own little world. He'd looked untouchable in that instant, cold, almost dead… Sam shivered at that thought… he hadn't held a gun since… since he'd tried to put a real bullet in his brother's heart with one back at the Asylum. He didn't ever want to be in that situation again, he didn't ever want to think, 'what if…' again but he couldn't help it.
"Dean…" he began, almost begging for his brother's attention Dean gave it to him with a quick turn of his head, staring at Sam, the distance seemed to dissipate leaving a very much alive Dean sat beside him. "We have to talk after this, we have to find a way to get over it," Sam practically whispered, Dean nodded softly turning his attention back to the road.
"I know Sammy, but it's going to take some time," Dean explained, noting the house ahead of them, "looks like we're here." He stated, pulling up on the drive and removing the keys, turning the car off. They just sat there in silence for a while staring up at the house. Before Dean opened the door and stepped out onto the driveway, "come on," he ordered softly as he slammed the door shut behind him and began to make his way towards the house. Sam followed suit, stepping out of the car and running to catch up with his older brother.
With a sigh and using his uninjured hand Dean knocked on the wooden door several times, a while layer the door was opened to reveal a teenage boy, roughly seventeen or eighteen, stood in the doorway. He glanced at the two men stood before him as they smiled down at him and crossed his arms across his chest, perfectly shaped eyebrow raising in a silent question that somehow both Dean and Sam managed to understand.
"Hey, Alex isn't it? We're old friends of your fathers and were just in the neighbourhood, thought we'd drop by, is he in?" Sam asked, Alex narrowed his eyes slightly as a soft smile tugged at his lips.
"Friends of my fathers?" He asked, Dean nodded softly, smiling back at the boy with that boyish smile of his.
"Yeah, is he in?" Dean inquired once again; the teen just smirked and shook his head, leaning against the doorframe.
"No, he went out to work a few hours ago," Alex explained, falling silent,
"Really, damn, it would have been nice to catch up with him," before Dean could hint at the boy letting them come in, Alex pushed himself away from the doorframe, standing aside and smiling softly as he motioned inside the house.
"Please come in, I don't know how long he'll be but I'm here on my own and bored out of my fucking wits you two look like fun, why don't you stay for a while." Dean looked over at Sam with a look that clearly said, 'well that makes our job a hell of a lot easier' before he nodded and stepped inside brushing against Alex on the way who merely smirked and looked him up and down, nodding almost appreciably. Sam stepped in next, watching the boy out of the corner of his eye as he continued to watch Dean walk away. Sam bit his lip and narrowed his eyes as he followed Dean into the lounge, hearing the soft click of the door being shut and locked as he went.
"He doesn't believe a word we said does he?" Sam whispered, standing just infront of Dean, Dean just chuckled and shrugged.
"I don't think so but the kid let us in, we may aswell see what we can find out, something's telling me he's not chasing after the award for 'best son,'" Dean explained as he sat down on the couch Sam sitting beside him. Alex entered the room a second later, sitting in the armchair opposite of the two.
"Sorry I didn't catch your names," Alex stated softly, leaning back in the chair, Dean smirked, glancing the boy over he was thin with a slight muscular build, an attractive slightly effeminate figure. He was about an inch or two shorter than Dean with long black hair that fell just past his shoulders and fell messily into his deep blue eyes. He was dressed casually in a tight black T-shirt and faded, ripped, denim jeans. An interesting clown pendant hanging from his neck. Silver with a smiling clown face stuck on a sort of thin pointed cross that hang from a silver chain to rest on his chest.
"That's because we didn't give them," Dean gibed softly, smirking at the teen who merely smirked back. "I'm Dean, this is Sam," Dean said, Alex smiled and nodded, as if in some way approving their names. He then frowned and leant forward,
"It's strange though my father's never mentioned you before, and I think you're a bit young to be friends with my fuck head of a father," Alex explained licking his lips, Dean smirked and shrugged placing his feet on the coffee table before them and leaning back into the couch.
"Well actually he's one of our fathers friends, we used to see him from time to time when we were kids, just thought that we could come and say hi, was all," Dean said matter of factly, Alex nodded, either pretending to, or actually buying into, the story. "So where's your mother?" Dean asked,
"My parents got divorced two years ago, she lives in California with her new husband and her new kids, she didn't want to take the old crap with her so I had to stay in this shit hole with father dearest." Alex explained placidly, as if he didn't care about it at all, Dean locked gazes with him and his smile fell. What a wonderful mask this boy had created for himself and how alike they were.
"Sorry," Dean almost whispered, Alex shook his head, smiling softly,
"Don't worry about it, that's life for you, you love someone with everything you've got never knowing that one day they'll turn around and shoot you in the heart." Sam froze at what the black-haired teen had just said and hazarded a look over at Dean who just sat there nodding.
"How philosophical of you," Dean said, Alex just shrugged and smiled,
"Neh, I'm a philosophy student or was, I dropped out, couldn't be fucked, I was always far more interested in music and stuff anyway. School was just an annoyance to me." Alex explained, Dean smirked and nodded,
"A boy after my own heart, what kind of music you into?" Sam rolled his eyes, they were not going to find anything out this way.
"Mainly rock, I love the classics, Nirvana, Led Zeppelin, Alice in Chains, Metallica,"
"God you have great taste, hear that Sam, someone with appreciation for the legends," Dean nudged Sam as he smiled over at Alex as if the boy had just told him the secret to the universe. Sam wasn't entirely sure why but he suddenly had the urge to punch Alex's face in.
"Can I ask you two something?" Alex asked, Sam and Dean just nodded, Alex smirked once again, "you are obviously not here to talk to my father so please, tell me, why are you two really here?" Dean glanced over at Sam and nodded, Sam sighed, leaning forward on the couch.
"Have you ever heard of a place called Rosenkreuz Asylum?" Alex stared at them for a while, silently, before he chuckled and shook his head.
"Nope, never heard of a Rosenkreuz Asylum," both Dean and Sam frowned slightly causing Alex to chuckle once again. "However I have heard of Rosenkreuz Orphanage, on the very edge of the town, is that what you two are talking about?" Sam and Dean glanced at each other in confusion before turning back to look at Alex?
"Orphanage?"
"Yeah, Rosenkreuz used to be an Orphanage, most people just refer to it as Rosenkreuz though, I guess over time people believed it to be an Asylum, as no one in this god forsaken place will talk about it no one ever set them straight. Interesting how things like that happen isn't it?"
"Yeah," Dean and Sam chorused, "I don't suppose you know what happened there?" Sam asked, Alex looked at him with a soft smile.
"Bits and pieces, I don't know the original story but I know that a lot of kids ended up dead there and that kids from the town have been showing up there dead. No explanation for how they got there or what happened to them." Alex explained matter of factly,
"How come no one's talking about this?" Dean asked, Alex shrugged,
"I don't know, my dad and his minions are trying their best to keep it a secret, the town elders don't want to go public with it. I'm guessing that they think it'll reflect badly on the town. Especially because they don't know how to explain any of it,"
"What about the children's parents?" Sam asked,
"No one really knows, they just seem to vanish, no ones ever sees them again, everyone who knew them is too afraid to talk about it. Eventually it just became this horrible secret carried around by half of the town; most of the people my age don't know a thing about it. I only know as much as I do from going through the files in my dad's office." Alex explained,
"Why are you telling us all of this?" Sam wondered aloud, Alex smiled,
"Because I don't care if people know, these things happen, I had nothing to do with them, why should I keep it a secret? I'm not taken the burdens of this town to my grave, I don't care enough to." Alex explained, "now that I've answered that, you two answer me this, what are you really doing here, and don't say that you were just passing through, I may have dropped out of school but I am not an idiot." Alex snarled, voice low, eyes narrowed,
"We're trying to find out what is happening at Rosenkreuz and put a stop to it, stuff like this, it's kind of our job." Dean said with a slight yawn, God he was tired, one of these nights he was going to take a bottle of sleeping pills and get a good nights rest.
"So you're what, like paranormal investigators or something?" Alex asked suspiciously, Dean chuckled and nodded.
"Yeah that's it, but we don't call ourselves that, sounds way too fucking geeky," Dean explained, "we're more, hunters, and our prey is the stuff that goes bump in the night,"
"Cool, so does this mean that all that supernatural stuff really exists, ghosts, demons, the bogeyman?" Alex asked looking intrigued and with an almost sadistic smile on his face.
"I hate to say but yeah, it does," Dean said, Alex nodded,
"Hold on, if you're investigating Rosenkreuz why the fuck are you talking to me, shouldn't you be checking the place out or something?" Alex asked, flicking a few strands of hair out of his eyes.
"We will, at the moment we're doing background checks, trying to find out what happened so that we're not walking in blind. Unfortunately we're not getting anywhere, no one who wants to talk knows anything and the people who don't want to talk definitely know something they're not willing to share." Dean explained, "that's where we were hoping you could help, you said earlier that you had access to your father's office and his files. We need those files Alex." Dean explained,
"So what, you want me to break into my father's office, steal the files and give them to you so that you can go and blast the evil spirits or whatever's in there to hell?" Alex asked
"In a nutshell, you willing?" Alex rose from his seat walking over to the couch and sitting down on the table infront of the Winchester brothers.
"I'm willing and able, of course you'll have to do something for me," Alex said with a smirk, Dean raised an eyebrow staring at the teen inquisitively.
"And what would that be?" Sam asked, Alex smiled and shrugged,
"I want Dean to kiss me," Sam blinked several times and Dean coughed nervously, normally he would have no hesitations about a deal like that. After all Alex was an amazingly attractive boy, but Sam thought that Dean was a slut for this exact reason. This would just be whoring himself away again, and what would Sammy think of him then? "Well?" Alex prompted, gently tapping at the wood of the table. Dean glanced over at Sam who was merely staring at Alex as if he had just grown another head.
"Why?" Dean asked trying to stall as the thoughts thumped within his head,
"Because I think you're incredibly good looking," Alex answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, God; did this kid never get embarrassed? "Come on, a kiss for the files, I'm not asking for the world," Alex explained, twirling a strand of hair around his finger, Alex casually glanced out of the window and smirked. "Make your mind up soon because this offer will become void in roughly three minutes," the teen explained, folding his arms across his chest. Dean glanced over at Sam once again to see that he was still staring at Alex, rolling his eyes he chased all of the annoying thoughts away and rose to his feet.
"Fine, after all it's only a kiss right," Alex smirked and also rose to his feet, yet he did not moved, stayed stood infront of the coffee table, with a smirk Dean moved towards him, leaning in and whispering slightly. "I know what you're doing," Dean whispered into Alex's ear, he chuckled and threw his head back, chuckling softly,
"Good, then hurry up," Alex whispered back, Dean just smirked and rolled his eyes, he could feel Sam's eyes on them, on him burning into him with such a force it was unsettling. What did Sam expect? Sometimes he didn't have a choice, sometimes, a kiss, or his body, was simply a bargaining chip and why couldn't he use that to his advantage, why did that make him a slut? Surely Sam could understand that it didn't. With a slight growl Dean grabbed hold of Alex, slamming his lips against those of the raven-haired males. Alex responded eagerly his hands cupping Dean's face, running through his hair.
They both smirked before resuming the kiss once again, their tongue's battling for dominance, to say that Sam was livid as he sat there watching the scene unfold was an understatement. Sam had never been so fucking angry, never been so jealous, and he was more than acceptant of the fact that he wasn't jealous of Dean. Sam didn't want to kiss Alex, he wanted Dean. He was so deep in his rage that he didn't notice when the door opened, or when the man walked into the room saying something about being home for lunch. He didn't notice anything until they stopped and Dean looked down at him with a smirk.
Before Sam could do or say anything the man he presumed to be Sheriff Macabre had grabbed hold of Dean's collar and was snarling down at him. Sam was stood in seconds, grabbing hold of the older man's wrists and trying to force him off of his brother before either he did Dean, or Dean did him, any harm.
"What the fuck is going on here, who are you two, what are you doing in my house and why were you kissing my son?" The Sheriff growled lowly as Sam finally managed to remove the elder's hands from his brother's collar. Pushing Dean back and protecting him from any further assault.
"Because I wanted him to," Alex snarled, eyes narrowing dangerously, "and even though it is none of your business father they are my friends, come on guys, I'll show you out," Alex said, smiling satisfactorily as he led Sam and Dean towards the door. Alex walked them both out to the Impala, passing Dean his phone number when they reached it. "Call me tomorrow, I should have the files by then," Alex explained, Dean nodded and slipped the number into his jacket pocket.
"Right, thanks for doing this for us," Dean said, Alex just smiled and shrugged,
"It's ok, thanks for that back there, I was wondering how I could break it to him that I was gay, that was the perfect way, he'll be seething for weeks." Alex said, laughing softly,
"Will you be ok with him?" Dean asked, Alex nodded and smiled,
"Don't worry about it, he can't touch me, I'll see you guys tomorrow ok," Alex said as he walked away disappearing into the house. Dean sighed and slipped into the car, Sam sliding in beside him.
"What the hell was that all about Dean?" Sam practically growled
"What was what about?" Dean asked, genuinely seeming confused, Sam just sighed and rolled his eyes,
"You and Alex in there, you barely even know the kid," the younger muttered, glaring at his older brother. Dean's eyes narrowed and he couldn't help but chuckle softly.
"What are you on about Sam, it was a kiss, just one little kiss, for all of that information. He could have asked me to do a lot more Sam,"
"Yeah and you would have done it, wouldn't you Dean? No matter what it had been, if he would have asked to fuck you, you would have got down on you hands and knees, with that stupid grin on your face because…" before Sam could finish his sentence Dean butted in. Eyes dark and shimmering with, hurt… with betrayal… with immense emotional pain, and Sam wished that he could take back all of what he had just said,
"Because I'm a slut right Sammy? Because all I'm good at is whoring myself off? Well sometimes I have no choice but to do that. If I wouldn't have kissed him then we wouldn't have got the information we needed, which would have slowed us down leaving another kid to be killed in the meantime. Now maybe it's just me but if I had the choice between being fucked by Alex or an innocent child being killed by something up in that Orphanage. Then I'd chose being fucked any day." Dean growled, "If that makes me a slut, then so be it,"
"Dean, I didn't mean it… I was just mad…"
"It's fine Sam, let's just go to the Asylum, sort all of this out and then get the hell out of here." Dean turned the key in the ignition Metallica immediately blasting out of the radio. Sam sighed heavily letting his head fall against the window, he hadn't meant to say all of that, he had just been… well… he'd been jealous. Which was strange because Dean was his brother and technically he shouldn't have been jealous of some guy kissing his brother. That didn't change the fact that he was though. Sam sighed once again and closed his eyes tightly, it didn't make any sense, he wasn't making any sense.
Dean took a deep breath to try and calm himself down as he drove away from the woods and back onto the main road. He couldn't work out why Sam didn't understand, wasn't it obvious by now, did Dean have to draw little diagrams to explain why he had done the things he had? Then again he was so angry that Sam couldn't understand without the fucking diagrams, wasn't he supposed to be his brother, wasn't he supposed to love him despite all of his faults. Dean growled softly, his head was pounding.
He didn't want to have to think about all of this any more, he wished that he hadn't listened to that tape, wished that he could just forget it all and everything could go back to normal. Yet he knew that, that couldn't happen. Things weren't going to be normal between him and Sam for a long time. No matter how much either of them wanted it to be…
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Ok well that's the third chapter forth will be on it's way soon, please review and tell me what you thought n.n Oh and I love 'Alice in chains' even though they were completely overshadowed by Nirvana, who I do love aswell, so I just thought I'd mention them here because their music is REALLY good n.n anyhoo please review n.n
XXX